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In this episode, I sit down with Stephen Cervantes to explore the deepest desires of the human heart — to be fully known, loved, forgiven, enjoyed, and celebrated. We discuss how these beautiful, God-given desires can become problematic when we turn them into demands on other people. 

While humans can love and forgive abundantly, only God can do so fully. We also reflect on how concepts like the Five Love Languages can unintentionally create unrealistic expectations in relationships. Ultimately, we're reminded that true fulfillment comes from delighting in God, who meets our heart's desires perfectly.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of deep human desires: being fully known, loved, forgiven, enjoyed, and celebrated.
• Distinction between desires and needs, emphasizing the potential for disappointment when desires are treated as needs.
• Discussion on the limitations of human relationships in fulfilling these deep desires.
• The spiritual versus earthly realms and how they relate to human experiences of love and forgiveness.
• Consequences of placing unrealistic expectations on others based on concepts like the Five Love Languages.
• The idea that only God can fully meet these desires, while humans can only offer love and forgiveness abundantly.
• The importance of accepting human limitations in relationships to avoid disappointment and anger.
• Encouragement to seek fulfillment of desires through God rather than through others.
• Recognition of the growth potential in human relationships as individuals learn to love more abundantly.
• The role of earthly relationships in reflecting God's love and grace, while acknowledging their inherent limitations.

More Resources:

• Resources for Men
• Resources for Wives
• Resources for Family

Related Podcasts:

• Why Jesus?
• I Want to Be Known
• Knowing Your True Identity Beyond Sexual Brokenness

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In this episode of Family Time, I sit down with Norma Q-Brown, our Family Care Director, to discuss the fourth of our six “Critical Conversations” for parents: Dealing with Temptation. We explore how to help kids recognize and respond to temptation without shame, emphasizing grace, honesty, and open communication. 

Norma shares practical tips for building trust, normalizing temptation as a human experience, and equipping children with lifelong skills for integrity. We also talk about common barriers parents face and offer resources to support families on this journey. It’s all about progress, not perfection!

For all of our Family resources, including our free Critical Conversations online course, visit Bebroken.org/family.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of discussing sex and sexuality with children in a sexualized culture.
• Overview of the "Critical Conversations" series for parents.
• Focus on "Dealing with Temptation" as a key conversation topic.
• Understanding temptation as a universal human experience.
• Strategies for parents to help children recognize and resist temptation.
• The significance of approaching conversations with grace rather than shame.
• Common barriers parents face in discussing temptation with their children.
• The role of parental honesty and sharing personal experiences in building trust.
• Practical exercises for parents to engage children in conversations about temptation.
• Resources available for parents to further support these discussions.

Resources for Next Steps:

• Critical Conversation Online Course (free)
• Father-Son Accountability* by John Fort
• Girl Talk by Ashley Jameson

For more parenting podcasts, go to Bebroken.org/tp-pods and scroll to Family Bundles.

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with Linda McDonald, a licensed marriage and family therapist, to discuss her personal journey through betrayal, divorce, and healing on her own after her husband’s affair. Linda shares how her experience inspired her new book, “Redeeming the Post-Affair Divorce,” and introduces the term “betrandoned” to describe the unique, compounded grief of betrayal and abandonment. 

We explore the stigma, shame, and lack of closure in post-affair divorce, and Linda offers honest, faith-filled advice for finding hope, support, and true forgiveness after deep relational trauma.

To learn more about Linda and get her book, visit LindaJMacDonald.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal experiences of betrayal and divorce
• The concept of "betrandoned" (betrayal + abandon) and its implications
• Compounded grief associated with infidelity and divorce
• Differences in societal perceptions of widows versus divorcees
• The stigma and shame surrounding divorce due to infidelity
• The lack of rituals and support for those experiencing divorce from infidelity
• The process of recovery and the importance of brutal honesty
• The role of forgiveness in healing from betrayal
• The significance of finding supportive communities and resources
• The potential for redemption and hope after trauma and loss

More Resources:

• Redeeming the Post-Affair Divorce* by Linda MacDonald
• Redeeming the Post-Affair Divorce Workbook*
• "Betrandoned" YouTube Playlist

Related Podcasts:

• Betrayed and Abandoned on Affair Healing Podcast
• Dealing with Divorce, Betrayal Trauma, and Hope
• Is There Hope After Divorce Due to Sexual Betrayal?

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I welcome back Kristin Cary to explore the mind-body connection, especially how our bodies respond to trauma and betrayal. Kristin shares insights from her ministry, Living Truth, explaining how God designed our nervous systems to protect us through natural responses like fight, flight, or freeze. 

We discuss the importance of compassion over shame, practical grounding techniques (like the butterfly hug; even walking or jogging), and the vital role of community in healing. Kristin encourages us to honor our bodies as God’s creation and to approach trauma recovery with patience, curiosity, and faith.

To learn more about Kristin and her ministry, visit Living-Truth.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The mind-body connection and its relevance to trauma.
• Physiological responses to trauma, including the activation of the vagus nerve and the release of stress hormones.
• The fight, flight, or freeze responses as natural protective mechanisms.
• The impact of betrayal trauma on individuals, particularly betrayed spouses.
• The importance of reframing bodily trauma responses as positive warning systems rather than signs of weakness.
• The experience of shame among Christians regarding trauma responses and faith.
• The significance of understanding the body's signals and their role in emotional and spiritual health.
• Grounding techniques and self-soothing methods to regulate the nervous system.
• The role of community and relational support in healing from trauma.
• The necessity of practicing regulation strategies in calm states to prepare for stressful situations.

More Resources:

• Women in the Battle
• Wives Care Online Groups
• Going Deeper for Betrayed Partners* by Eddie & Teri Capparucci

Related Podcasts:

• The Need for Safety in Betrayal Trauma Healing
• Emotional Transformation Therapy for Betrayed Wives
• Online Care Groups for Wives Facing Betrayal Trauma

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with my friend and decades-long colleague, Dr. Stephen Cervantes, to explore our shared struggles with seeking approval and what it means to be an “approval junkie.” Together, we reflect on why we crave affirmation—from childhood to adulthood—and how this shapes our sense of belonging and self-worth. 

We discuss the dangers of letting approval define us, the role of leaders in fostering healthy communities, and ultimately, how true acceptance comes from God’s unconditional love. Join us as we unpack these honest, relatable experiences and encourage one another toward deeper healing and authentic connection.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org. 

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of the human need for approval and the concept of being an "approval junkie."
• Discussion on the origins of approval-seeking behavior rooted in early childhood development.
• Examination of the impact of seeking approval on self-worth and identity.
• Analysis of the different sources of approval, including peers, leaders, and spiritual figures.
• Consideration of the unhealthy aspects of excessive approval-seeking and its potential to become an addiction.
• Reflection on the role of leaders in affirming others and fostering healthy community dynamics.
• Insights into the emotional struggles associated with conditional approval and feelings of inadequacy.
• Discussion of "image building" and the conflict between external validation and internal acceptance.
• Emphasis on the importance of belonging and the safety it provides in community settings.
• Encouragement for listeners to seek true healing and identity through divine approval rather than human affirmation.

More Resources:

• Going Deeper by Dr. Eddie Capparucci
• Unwanted by Jay Stringer
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Going Deeper: How Your Inner Child Impacts Your Sex Addiction
• The Key to Real and Lasting Freedom from Porn
• Overcoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity

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In today’s Family Time episode, I sit down with Norma Q-Brown, our Family Care Director, to unpack the third critical conversation every parent needs to have with their child: preparing kids for exposure to sexualized content. We talk about why this comes after building trust and discussing God’s design for sex, and share practical ways to equip children for what they’ll inevitably see online or from peers. 

Norma offers encouragement, tips for open communication, and resources to help parents feel confident—not fearful—as they guide their kids through a sex-saturated culture with grace and understanding.

For all of our Family resources, visit Bebroken.org/family.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of discussing feelings and emotions with children as a foundation for trust.
• Understanding God's design for sex and its relevance in today's culture.
• Preparing children for exposure to sexualized content in various media.
• Common sources of sexualized content that children may encounter.
• Barriers parents face in initiating conversations about exposure.
• Consequences of avoiding discussions about sexual content with children.
• Key principles for parents to communicate regarding exposure and boundaries.
• Strategies for keeping communication open and non-judgmental.
• Practical exercises, such as role-playing, to prepare children for potential exposure.
• Resources and next steps for parents to engage in these critical conversations.

More Resources:

• Good Pictures Bad Pictures by Kristen Jenson
• A Family Game Plan for Discussing Porn (online course)
• Family Integrity Trio Bundle (online courses)

Related Podcasts:

• Helping Your Kids Know God's Good Design
• Better Screen Time for You and Your Family
• Brain Defense Digital Safety for Kids

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In this episode, I sit down with Stephen Cervantes, AKA "Doctor Marriage," to explore the journey of awakening from addiction. Together, we discuss how addiction numbs pain and stunts emotional and spiritual growth, and why facing our pain—rather than running from it—is key to healing. 

Stephen shares personal insights about slowing down, self-reflection, and finding freedom in Christ. If you’re fighting an addiction, we encourage you to embrace courage, seek support, and trust God’s grace as you move from darkness and disconnection into light, connection, and true emotional freedom.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Awakening from addiction and its emotional and spiritual dimensions.
• The role of addiction as a form of numbness and escape from pain.
• The impact of addiction on emotional growth and personal relationships.
• The importance of facing pain rather than avoiding it through addiction.
• The connection between childhood wounds and the onset of addiction.
• The process of self-examination and slowing down to confront personal pain.
• The significance of community, accountability, and spiritual support in recovery.
• The concept of courage in the face of fear and the journey of healing.
• The ongoing nature of awakening and spiritual growth beyond initial recovery.
• The hope and possibility of healing through faith and honest self-reflection.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• 40 Days of Purity online course
• Grace-Based Recovery* by Jonathan Daugherty

Related Podcasts:

• Inviting Men to Wake Up Emotionally and Spiritually
• Maxims that Help Us Go Beyond Sobriety in Recovery
• Are You on an Emotional and Spiritual Growth Mission?

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with Karla Summey, an APSATS coach and couples recovery specialist, to explore the “messy middle” couples face after sexual betrayal. Karla shares her personal and professional insights on navigating the emotional ups and downs, rebuilding trust, and redefining relationships. 

We discuss the importance of emotional regulation, transparency, and patience, emphasizing that recovery isn’t linear. Karla offers hope and practical advice for couples feeling stuck, highlighting the value of community, self-care, and taking small steps forward. It’s an honest, encouraging conversation for any couple walking this difficult road. 

To learn more about Karla and her resources, visit KarlaSummey.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The concept of "the messy middle" in recovery after sexual betrayal.
• The emotional and relational challenges couples face during the recovery process.
• The importance of individual and couple growth in navigating betrayal trauma.
• The role of emotional regulation and communication in rebuilding trust.
• Common assumptions couples have about returning to their previous relationship dynamics.
• The significance of transparency and initiative from the betrayer in the recovery journey.
• The non-linear nature of recovery, including setbacks and progress.
• Strategies for emotional co-regulation and support between partners.
• The vision for couples beyond the messy middle, focusing on security and intimacy.
• The importance of community and shared experiences in the healing process.

More Resources:

• Messy Middle Couple's Recovery Group
• Online Care Groups for Wives
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model
• The Three Phases of Couples Recovery
• The Recovery Process for Couples

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In today’s episode, I sit down with Mary DeMuth, author of Restory Your Life, to talk about her powerful journey from childhood trauma and sexual abuse to healing and restoration through faith in Jesus. Mary shares how storytelling, community, and embracing our identity in Christ help us move from brokenness to wholeness. 

We discuss the ongoing nature of healing, the importance of safe spaces to share our unfiltered stories, and how God can re-story our lives for hope and purpose. Mary’s honesty and wisdom offer encouragement for anyone seeking restoration and a new chapter in their story. 

To learn more about Mary and get her books, visit MaryDeMuth.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Mary Demuth's personal journey of healing from childhood trauma and sexual abuse.
• The role of faith in Jesus in the healing process.
• The concept of restoration as a journey from brokenness to wholeness.
• The importance of storytelling and community in healing.
• The idea of "re-storying" one's life and redefining identity through faith.
• The ongoing nature of healing and the layers involved in trauma recovery.
• The significance of expressing thoughts and sharing experiences to break cycles of pain.
• The distinction between healing and maturing in the context of personal growth.
• Practical tools for restoration, including journaling and reflecting on one's story.
• The need for safe spaces in communities, particularly churches, to discuss and address issues of sexual abuse.

More Resources:

• Restory Your Life* by Mary DeMuth
• The Wall Around Your Heart* by Mary DeMuth
• Sex & Anxiety (online course)

Related Podcasts:

• Help and Hope for Women to Heal from Sexual Abuse
• Lord Be Near: Finding Hope in Suffering through Prayer
• Freedom and Healing from Shame, Addiction, and Abuse

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with Drs. Matt and Laura Burton to talk about rebuilding a marriage after sexual betrayal. We explore their personal recovery and healing journeys, the challenges of rebuilding trust, and why true recovery goes beyond just sobriety. 

The Burtons share insights on the importance of involving both partners, the process of compassionate disclosure, and how addressing deeper wounds is key to restoring relationships. Their warmth and expertise offer hope and practical guidance for any couple navigating the difficult path toward renewed connection and trust after infidelity or addiction.

To learn more about Matt and Laura and their resources for couples, visit MyBecomingWell.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Counseling for couples and individuals dealing with sexual addiction and infidelity.
• Personal recovery journeys of the speakers and their professional experiences.
• Challenges in rebuilding trust after sexual betrayal.
• The importance of involving both partners in the recovery process.
• Complexities of recovery beyond mere sobriety, including intimacy and attachment issues.
• The significance of relational healing in the recovery journey.
• The concept of "gentle disclosure" in the context of rebuilding trust.
• The emotional realities and fears faced by both partners after betrayal.
• The necessity of addressing underlying issues and pre-existing wounds in recovery.
• Resources and support available for couples navigating the aftermath of sexual betrayal.

More Resources:

• 3-Day Couple's Group Intensives
• Rebuilding Trust* by Matt & Laura Burton
• More Books and Workbooks by Matt & Laura Burton

Related Podcasts:

• The Three Phases of Couples Recovery
• Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal
• The Journey to Stay (with Steve and Lisa Goldberg)

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode of "Family Time," I sit down with Norma Q-Brown, our Family Care Director, to discuss how parents can confidently guide their kids through a sex-saturated culture. We focus on the second critical conversation: teaching children about God’s design for sex. Norma shares practical advice for having ongoing, honest, and grace-filled talks, addressing common barriers and emphasizing the importance of building trust.

We encourage parents to be vulnerable, seek God’s wisdom, and create a safe space for questions—reminding everyone that these conversations are a journey we take together as families.

For all our Family Care resources, visit Bebroken.org/family.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Introduction of the "Family Time" segment aimed at helping parents engage with their children.
• Discussion on the importance of proactive conversations about sex from a biblical perspective.
• Emphasis on the foundational elements of family care ministry, particularly "God's Design for Sex."
• The significance of teaching children about authority and God's design in a sex-saturated culture.
• Explanation of covenant relationships and the boundaries set by God regarding sex.
• Challenges parents face in discussing sex, including personal trauma and cultural pressures.
• The importance of ongoing, age-appropriate conversations about sex and sexuality.
• Strategies for parents to foster open dialogue, including asking questions and being honest.
• Resources and tools available for parents to aid in these discussions.
• Encouragement for parents to seek God's wisdom and guidance in navigating these conversations.

Resources for Next Steps:

• Critical Conversation Online Course (free)
• God Made Your Body* by Jim Burns
• Honest Talk: The Game

For more parenting podcasts, go to Bebroken.org/tp-pods and scroll to Family Bundles.

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with Anne Edward, who shares her powerful journey from childhood trauma and same-sex attraction to finding hope, healing, and her true identity in Jesus Christ. Anne opens up about her struggles, the process of forgiveness, and how embracing her God-given identity led to transformation. 

We discuss why true change goes deeper than behavior—it's about understanding who we are in Christ. Anne now leads Restored Hope Network, helping others find freedom from sexual brokenness. Our conversation is honest, compassionate, and full of encouragement for anyone wrestling with identity or seeking wholeness in faith.

To learn more about Anne and Restored Hope Network, visit RestoredHopeNetwork.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Anne's personal story of overcoming sexual brokenness and trauma.
• The impact of childhood trauma on identity and sexual attraction.
• The journey to faith in Jesus Christ and the challenges faced post-conversion.
• The importance of forgiveness and inner healing in personal growth.
• The role of identity, particularly sexual identity, in struggles with sexual brokenness.
• The distinction between behavior modification and addressing core identity issues.
• The dangers of defining identity solely by sexual attractions and behaviors.
• The significance of understanding identity as rooted in God's design and purpose.
• Approaches for Christians to engage compassionately with those struggling with identity issues.
• A message of hope and healing through God's grace and the importance of trusting in Him.

More Resources:

• Hope 2026 Conference
• Such Were Some of You (Documentary)
• Changed Movement

Related Podcasts:

• Am I Gay? (with Garry Ingraham)
• Helping Parents Respond with Truth and Love to their LGBTQ-Identifying Child
• Changed: The Amazing Transformation of a Former Lesbian Pastor

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In this episode, I chat with Elizabeth Urbanowicz about her book, Helping Your Kids Know God’s Good Design: 40 Questions and Answers on Sexuality and Gender. Elizabeth shares her journey as a Christian educator and how she equips parents to teach kids about sexuality and gender from a biblical perspective.

We discuss God’s design for sex, the importance of ongoing conversations, how to address tough topics like pornography and gender confusion, and how to love others with grace and truth. Elizabeth offers practical advice for parents navigating today’s culture, always pointing back to the sufficiency of God’s Word and a thriving relationship with Jesus.

To learn more about Elizabeth and get her book, visit FoundationWorldview.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Biblical design for sexuality and marriage as a lifelong covenant between one man and one woman.
• Understanding sex as a gift within marriage for intimacy and procreation.
• Importance of focusing on the relationship with Christ rather than idolizing marriage.
• Strategies for parents to educate children about sexuality and gender in a culturally saturated environment.
• Addressing the topic of pornography and preparing children for potential exposure.
• The significance of teaching children about God's design for sex from a young age.
• Navigating conversations about sexual brokenness and honesty with children.
• Teaching children to love others while maintaining biblical truth without affirming sin.
• Guidelines for media consumption and discernment regarding content.
• Encouraging ongoing growth and reliance on God's grace in discussions about sexuality.

More Resources:

• Helping Your Kids Know God's Good Design by Elizabeth Urbanowicz
• Family Integrity: Curiosity (online course)
• 7 Tips to Help You Address Sexual Issues with Your Kids

Related Podcasts:

• Parenting in a Hyper-Sexualized and Identity-Confused Culture
• Navigating Identity and Sexuality: A Compassionate Approach for Parents
• How Parents Can Effectively Engage in Sexual Discipleship with their Kids

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In today’s episode, I sit down with Clinton and Nikki Mitchell, who bravely share their 31-year marriage journey through addiction, infidelity, and ultimately, healing. We talk about the pain of secrecy, the power of full disclosure, and how faith, therapy, and community helped them rebuild trust and spiritual intimacy. 

Their story is raw and honest, showing that even in the darkest moments, hope and restoration are possible. I’m inspired by their courage and grateful for their wisdom, and I hope their journey encourages and emboldens anyone facing similar struggles.

Learn more about Clinton and Nikki and get their book at DWN4.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal story of marriage and struggles with addiction and infidelity.
• Impact of pornography addiction on relationships and faith.
• The cycle of avoidance and denial in addressing marital issues.
• The significance of seeking help through therapy and accountability.
• The concept of "fresh start" thinking in marriage and its pitfalls.
• The journey toward healing and restoration through spiritual intimacy.
• The importance of honesty and vulnerability in rebuilding trust.
• The role of community support in overcoming personal struggles.
• Practical ways to cultivate spiritual intimacy in a relationship.
• The hope and possibility of redemption in the face of betrayal.

More Resources:

• Glory from the Ashes* by Clinton and Nikki Mitchell
• More Resources from DWN4
• Building True Intimacy* by Drake and Raabsmith

Related Podcasts:

• The Role of Boundaries in Marriage Restoration
• Beyond Broken Vows: Rebuilding Marriage After Sexual Betrayal
• PSR Podcast Bundle: Marriage Testimonies

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with friend and former guest, Tammy Gustafson, a counselor and author of "Broken to Brave," to talk about healing after betrayal trauma. Tammy shares why wives often get stuck in their recovery—especially when pressured to trust or forgive too soon—and explains the importance of grieving and processing emotions like anger and sadness. 

We discuss how true healing requires safety, honesty, and support, and Tammy offers practical advice for wives and their loved ones. Whether you’re feeling stuck or wondering when it’s safe to trust again, this conversation brings hope and encouragement for your journey.

To learn more about Tammy and get her new book, visit TammyGustafson.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Healing from betrayal trauma, particularly for betrayed wives.
• Common challenges faced by wives during the healing process.
• The concept of feeling "stuck" in the healing journey.
• The importance of processing grief and emotions like anger and sadness.
• The role of trust and forgiveness in the healing process.
• The significance of establishing safety before rebuilding intimacy.
• The need for emotional safety and understanding in relationships post-betrayal.
• The impact of fear and doubt on a wife's readiness to trust again.
• The importance of support from loved ones during the healing journey.
• Insights from the book Broken to Brave: Your Courageous Act of Healing After Intimate Betrayals.

More Resources:

• Broken to Brave* by Tammy Gustafson
• Online Care Groups for Wives
• Wives Care Basics Webinar (free)

Related Podcasts:

• Betrayal Healing Phases
• The Need for Boundaries After Betrayal
• Self-Care and Rest for Wives Healing from Betrayal Trauma

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode of our new “Family Time” segment, I chat with Norma Brown, our Family Care Director, about the first of six “critical conversations” parents should have with their kids: Feelings and Emotions. We focus on the importance of talking about feelings and emotions as the foundation for deeper topics like sex. 

Norma shares practical tips, resources like the “Honest Talk Game,” and encouragement for parents to build trust and emotional connection. Together, we explore how modeling vulnerability and emotional honesty can help families create a safe space for open, ongoing conversations.

For all our Family Care resources, visit Bebroken.org/family.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Introduction of the "Family Time" segment focused on parenting in a sex-saturated culture.
• Importance of having "critical conversations" with children.
• First critical conversation centered on feelings and emotions.
• Building trust and emotional expression as foundational elements in parent-child communication.
• The role of parents in modeling emotional regulation and expression.
• Strategies for parents to connect with their children emotionally.
• Tools and resources to facilitate discussions about emotions, such as emotion wheels and the "Honest Talk Game."
• Encouragement for parents to embark on their own emotional growth journey.
• The significance of vulnerability and humility in parenting.
• Reassurance that it's never too late to start building emotional connections with children.

Resources for Next Steps:

• Just Between Us Journal*
• Honest Talk* by John Fort
• Honest Talk: The Game

For more parenting podcasts, go to Bebroken.org/tp-pods and scroll to Family Bundles.

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, Stephen Cervantes and I roll up our sleeves to explore the journey of recovery from unwanted sexual behaviors. We discuss the deeper transformation needed beyond just sobriety, sharing over a dozen practical maxims and spiritual insights that will help you aim for life beyond recovery. 

We reflect on aging, grief, and the challenges of change, emphasizing honesty, community, and trusting God. Through personal stories and recovery wisdom, we encourage listeners to take small, consistent steps, embrace vulnerability, and remember that lasting change is a process—one day, and one choice, at a time.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Recovery from unwanted sexual behaviors and addiction
• Importance of foundational change and emotional work in recovery
• The role of honesty and obedience in personal transformation
• Reflections on aging, grief, and spiritual growth
• Application of common recovery sayings to foster progress
• The necessity of genuine behavioral and mindset changes
• The significance of patience and persistence in the recovery process
• The relationship between knowledge and lived experience in transformation
• The metaphor of the "hallway" as a space for learning during uncertain times
• Emphasis on community support and accountability in the recovery journey

More Resources:

• Maxims that Help Us Through Change (blog post mentioned in episode)
• Grace-Based Recovery* by Jonathan Daugherty
• Transformation Pathway Journal for Men*

Related Podcasts:

• 3 Levels of Sobriety
• Beyond Sobriety: How to Truly Heal from Compulsive Sexual Behaviors
• Keys to Long-Term Freedom from Unwanted Behaviors

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Stephen Cervantes from DoctorMarriage.org to explore how we see ourselves, others, and how Jesus sees us all. We dive into the impact of shame, addiction, and early life experiences on our identity, and discuss the healing power of viewing ourselves through Jesus’s compassionate eyes. 

Together, we reflect on practical ways to break free from self-judgment and embrace a more loving, connected life—reminding ourselves that we’re all on a journey toward growth, healing, and deeper relationships, with God, ourselves, and others.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of self-perception and its impact on personal growth.
• Examination of how individuals perceive others and the implications of these views.
• Discussion of Jesus's perspective on individuals and others.
• The role of early life experiences in shaping self and other perceptions.
• The influence of shame and guilt in addiction and identity struggles.
• The transformative potential of understanding Jesus's compassionate view.
• The connection between self-acceptance and recovery from addiction.
• The impact of pain on self-view and behavior patterns.
• The relationship between self-identity and social connections.
• The importance of compassion and community in healing and personal development.

More Resources:

• Identity* by John Fort
• Daily Thoughts from Doctor Marriage
• Gentle and Lowly* by Dane Ortlund

Related Podcasts:

• Overcoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity
• Breaking Free from Shame: Knowing Your Identity in Christ
• How to Be at Peace in Aloneness

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In today’s episode, our guest is Noah Filipiak, a pastor, author, and podcaster who is passionate about applying the reality of the gospel to the real struggles and challenges of life, especially struggles with porn and sexual brokenness. Noah opens up about his personal struggles with pornography addiction, which began in his teenage years despite growing up in a Christian home. He shares how vulnerability, community, and a deeper relationship with Christ were key to his recovery. 

We discuss the importance of addressing these issues of sexual brokenness openly within the church and fostering supportive communities. A big part of the conversation is helping men understand what the true bullseye is for recovery from unwanted sexual behaviors. Noah emphasizes that true healing comes from understanding one's identity in Christ, not just behavior modification. The good news is that there is hope for truly overcoming any unwanted sexual behaviors through the power of God’s grace and vulnerable community.

To learn more about Noah and his resources, visit BeyondtheBattle.net.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Men's sexual integrity journeys
• Personal experiences with pornography addiction
• Challenges faced growing up in a Christian environment
• The role of vulnerability and community in recovery
• The impact of marriage on sexual desires and relationships
• Understanding identity in Christ as a foundation for healing
• The importance of addressing sexual integrity within the church
• Overcoming shame and fear of vulnerability in discussions
• The significance of community support in the recovery process
• Practical steps for engaging in deeper transformation and discipleship

More Resources:

• Beyond the Battle Online Groups
• Needed Navigation Teen Guide
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Porn Addiction Recovery for Men Podcast Bundle
• Recovery Discovery 002: Identity
• How Can Recovery Lead to a New Growth Mission?

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In this episode, we dive into the dynamics of "loners" and "connectors" in relationships. Everyone falls into one of these categories. As we explore this topic, my friend and co-host Stephen Cervantes discusses how loners tend to be independent and process internally, while connectors thrive on dialogue and emotional exchange. We examine how these differences impact communication and emotional connection, particularly in marriages. 

We share insights on personal growth, emphasizing the importance of understanding and appreciating each other's communication styles; we aren’t out to change a loner into a connector or vice versa. We give lots of personal anecdotes and practical advice, aiming to help you navigate these differences to foster deeper connections and build stronger, more fulfilling relationships.

For daily thoughts from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

To read the Thought on Loners and Connectors, go to DoctorMarriage.org/loners-and-connectors.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Distinction between "loners" and "connectors" in personal relationships.
• Characteristics of loners: independence, introspection, and internal processing.
• Characteristics of connectors: relational, expressive, and dialogue-oriented.
• Impact of communication styles on relationships, particularly in marriage.
• Importance of emotional connection and its role in relationship dynamics.
• Challenges faced by loners in engaging with emotional exchanges.
• The necessity of active listening in fostering trust and connection.
• Strategies for navigating differences between loners and connectors.
• The role of personal growth in improving relationship dynamics.
• Encouragement for couples to discuss and understand their connection styles for deeper intimacy.

More Resources:

• 40 Days to Oneness by Stephen Cervantes
• The 40 Day Relationship Builder* by Stephen Cervantes
• Building True Intimacy* by Matthew & Joanna Raabsmith

Related Podcasts:

• Dealing with Conflict Podcast Bundle
• Working Through Emotional Disconnection in Marriage
• About Your Emotional Connecting Skills

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

----------

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Year-End Matching Gift Opportunity!

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Thank you for your support!

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In this episode, I sit down with the incredible volunteer team behind the Wives Care groups, which is our eight-week online support group for wives healing from betrayal trauma. Together, we walk through the heart and structure of the program, sharing personal motivations and a week-by-week overview of what participants can expect. 

From emotional care and boundaries to rediscovering identity in Christ, we highlight the power of community, faith, and practical tools for healing. If you’re seeking hope and connection after betrayal, this episode offers encouragement, insight, and a warm invitation to join a caring community.

To learn more about the Wives Care Groups – and all our resources for wives, visit Bebroken.org/wives.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Overview of the Wives Care program and its purpose in supporting wives healing from betrayal trauma.
• Structure and evolution of the program, including its transition from a six-week to an eight-week format.
• Personal motivations and experiences of the volunteer team involved in the program.
• Week-by-week breakdown of the program's curriculum, highlighting key themes and activities.
• Importance of creating a safe and confidential space for participants to share their stories.
• Focus on emotional care, self-regulation, and the grieving process in the early weeks.
• Discussion on healthy detachment, boundary-setting, and communication tools for navigating relationships post-betrayal.
• Emphasis on rediscovering identity in Christ and addressing the impact of betrayal on self-worth.
• Community building and ongoing support opportunities beyond the initial program duration.
• Encouragement for women to seek help and connect with others for healing and restoration.

More Resources:

• Wives Care Basics Webinar (FREE!)
• 40 Days of Healing for Wives (eCourse)
• 6 Stages of Recovery for Partners of Sex Addicts

Related Podcasts:

• Wives Care Podcast Bundle - Betrayal Trauma Healing
• Helping Wives Restore Hope After Betrayal Trauma in Marriage
• Helping Wives Navigate the Emotional Rollercoaster of Incomplete Recovery After Betrayal Trauma

----------

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Year-End Matching Gift Opportunity!

Now through December 31, 2025 your gift will be DOUBLED, up to $71,500! Please help us reach this match in order to keep all our programs and services running strong into the New Year.

Partner with us at BeBroken.org/donate.

Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, I sit down with my good friend and colleague Dr. Stephen Cervantes—Doctor Marriage—to explore the vital roles of empathy, attunement, and responsiveness in relationships. We share personal stories and practical tips for husbands who want to connect more deeply with their wives. 

Dr. Cervantes explains how empathy means “practicing sadness with someone,” and we discuss how attunement and responsiveness help build emotional closeness. Whether you’re new to these skills or looking to grow, this conversation offers encouragement and real-life tools for nurturing a more compassionate, Christ-centered marriage.

To get daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of empathy, attunement, and responsiveness in marriage counseling.
• Definition of empathy as "practicing sadness with someone" and its role in emotional connection.
• The significance of being present with a partner during their emotional struggles.
• Clarification of empathy in a Christian context, equating it with compassion.
• The necessity of having the right emotional tools for genuine connection in relationships.
• The concept of attunement as matching a partner's mood and emotional state.
• The role of nonverbal communication in attunement and emotional connection.
• The importance of responsiveness after attuning to a partner's emotional state.
• The impact of emotional presence on healing and deeper connection in relationships.
• The ongoing nature of learning and practicing these skills for emotional growth in marriage.

More Resources:

• Daily Thoughts from Doctor Marriage
• Building True Intimacy* by Drake and Raabsmith
• Help Her Heal* by Carol J. Sheets

Related Podcasts:

• Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model
• Emotional Insights for Men
• The Three Phases of Couples Recovery

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

----------

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Year-End Matching Gift Opportunity!

Now through December 31, 2025 your gift will be DOUBLED, up to $71,500! Please help us reach this match in order to keep all our programs and services running strong into the New Year.

Partner with us at BeBroken.org/donate.

Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, our guest is Amber Albee Swenson—mom, Bible teacher, and author—to talk about her book, The Key to Confidence. Amber shares her personal journey from shame and brokenness to finding true confidence in Christ. 

We discuss the importance of understanding our identity as God’s children, the power of honest confession, and the vital role of prayer and community in healing. Amber’s transparency and wisdom offer hope for anyone struggling with feeling “not enough.” Join us for a raw, real, and uplifting conversation about grace, faith, and walking confidently in God’s love.

To learn more about Amber and her book, visit AmberAlbeeSwenson.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Amber Albee Swenson's personal journey and struggles with shame and sexual brokenness.
• The role of faith and identity in overcoming feelings of inadequacy.
• The distinction between self-confidence and confidence in God.
• The importance of understanding one's identity as a child of God.
• The significance of prayer in building confidence and healing.
• The concept of confession and its role in breaking the power of shame.
• The idea that past mistakes do not define one's identity in Christ.
• The transformative power of communal prayer and support within the Christian community.
• The focus of Amber's book as a spiritual resource rather than a self-help guide.
• Encouragement to trust in God's faithfulness and power, regardless of personal limitations.

More Resources:

• The Key to Confidence* by Amber Albee Swenson
• Getting Past the Past* by Amber Albee Swenson
• The Bondage Breaker* by Neil T. Anderson

Related Podcasts:

• PSR Podcast Bundle: Overcoming Shame
• Your True Identity: The Journey from Head Knowledge to Heart Belief in Christ
• How to Embrace Jesus-Centered Sexuality in a Broken World

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

----------

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Year-End Matching Gift Opportunity!

Now through December 31, 2025 your gift will be DOUBLED, up to $71,500! Please help us reach this match in order to keep all our programs and services running strong into the New Year.

Partner with us at BeBroken.org/donate.

Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, I sit down with Sean Maney, director of First Light in St. Louis, to discuss sexual recovery ministry. Sean shares how First Light supports men and women struggling with compulsive sexual behavior through community, therapy, and discipleship. 

We then explore the importance of holistic healing and transformation, the cultural normalization of pornography, and how the church’s response has changed over the years. Sean offers hope and encouragement for anyone feeling stuck or ashamed, reminding us that real transformation is possible through grace, community, and a multi-dimensional approach to recovery.

To learn more about Sean and his ministry, visit FirstLightStLouis.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Overview of First Light, a sexual discipleship ministry in St. Louis.
• Comprehensive recovery programs for individuals struggling with compulsive sexual behavior.
• Importance of community support and accountability in recovery.
• Role of therapy and counseling in addressing deeper emotional wounds.
• Discussion on the normalization of pornography in society and its impact on individuals and the church.
• Cultural shifts in attitudes towards pornography over the past 15 years.
• The progression of sexual behaviors from pornography to more severe actions.
• The need for a multi-dimensional recovery approach combining groups, counseling, and intensive care.
• Challenges faced by the church in addressing sexual brokenness and providing adequate support.
• Encouragement for individuals struggling with sexual issues to seek help and embrace community.

More Resources:

• Help for Men
• Help for Wives
• Help for Church Leaders

Related Podcasts:

• Can the Church Be a Safe Place for Healing and Transformation?
• Going Deeper: How Your Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction
• The Power of Vulnerability: How Group Support Transformed Mike's Recovery Journey

----------

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Year-End Matching Gift Opportunity!

Now through December 31, 2025 your gift will be DOUBLED, up to $71,500! Please help us reach this match in order to keep all our programs and services running strong into the New Year.

Partner with us at BeBroken.org/donate.

Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, I sit down with Drew Boa to discuss his new book, Outgrow Porn: Find Lasting Freedom Without Fighting an Exhausting Battle. Drew shares his personal journey and explains why traditional purity culture and military-style approaches often fall short. 

We then explore his compassionate, holistic method that focuses on healing childhood wounds, understanding emotional triggers, and embracing inner child work. Drew encourages viewing relapses as feedback, not failure, and highlights the importance of grace and self-compassion in recovery. If you’re a man seeking hope and lasting change, this conversation offers fresh insight and encouragement.

To get the book, visit OutgrowPorn.com. To learn more about Drew and his ministry, visit HusbandMaterial.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of pornography addiction, particularly among men.
• Critique of traditional purity culture and its limitations.
• Introduction of the "outgrow porn" approach to recovery.
• Emphasis on healing childhood wounds and inner child work.
• Exploration of core emotional triggers such as fear, shame, and loss.
• Importance of viewing relapses as feedback rather than failure.
• Promotion of a growth mindset in the recovery process.
• Connection between triggers and childhood experiences.
• The role of grace and self-compassion in recovery.
• Resources and support available through Husband Material Ministries.

More Resources:

• Outgrow Porn* by Drew Boa
• Husband Material Resources
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Outgrowing the Porn Pacifier
• Navigating the 3 Stages of Recovery from Porn Addiction
• The Key to Real and Lasting Freedom from Porn

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

----------

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Follow us on our Vimeo Channel.

Year-End Matching Gift Opportunity!

Now through December 31, 2025 your gift will be DOUBLED, up to $71,500! Please help us reach this match in order to keep all our programs and services running strong into the New Year.

Partner with us at BeBroken.org/donate.

Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, I sit down with returning guest Ashley Jameson, a sex educator and author of the new book "Girl Talk." We dive into why it’s so important for moms to have honest, ongoing conversations with their daughters about sex, even when it feels awkward or scary. 

Ashley shares personal stories, up-to-date research, and practical tips for starting these talks early, addressing common fears, and becoming a safe, trusted source for your kids—especially as they face pressures from peers, social media, and early exposure to pornography. If you’re a mom of a daughter, you won’t want to miss this conversation.

For more info on Ashley and the book, go to PureDesire.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of open communication between mothers and daughters about sexuality.
• Challenges and fears mothers face when discussing sex with their daughters.
• The risks of not addressing sexual topics early in a child's life.
• Insights from personal experiences and research on youth exposure to pornography.
• The role of parents as primary sources of information regarding sexual topics.
• The significance of starting conversations about sex at a young age.
• The impact of societal pressures and media on children's understanding of sexuality.
• Strategies for creating a safe environment for discussions about sex.
• The need for resources like the book "Girl Talk" to guide these conversations.
• The universal nature of curiosity and struggles related to sexuality among youth.

More Resources:

• Girl Talk* by Ashley Jameson
• Critical Conversations FREE online course
• 7 Tips for Parents (free download in English and Spanish)

Related Podcasts:

• Helping Your Kids Apply the Gospel to Sex and Sexuality
• Parenting in a Hypersexualized and Identity Confused Culture
• Helping the Next Generation Navigate Healthy Relationships

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

----------

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In this episode, I sit down with Stephen Cervantes to explore why so many of us feel stuck in our personal growth, especially men facing addiction and relational struggles. We share honest stories about excuses, limiting beliefs, and the deep fears that hold us back—like failure, rejection, and not feeling good enough. 

Together, we unpack how faith, hope, and community can help us move forward, break old cycles, and embrace the growth God has for us. We were created for “abundant life” and this means we all need a growth mission throughout life.

To get daily insights from Stephen Cervantes, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Theme of personal growth and overcoming feelings of being "stuck"
• Emotional, spiritual, and relational growth, particularly for men in recovery
• Common barriers to growth, including self-doubt, comparison, overwhelm, and confusion
• The role of personality and perspective in personal development
• Connection between past experiences and current struggles
• The significance of community and accountability in the growth process
• Exploration of limiting beliefs and excuses that hinder progress
• Discussion of core fears that contribute to feeling stuck, such as fear of failure, rejection, and abandonment
• Encouragement to embrace growth through curiosity, faith, and taking action despite discomfort

More Resources:

• 49 Days of Growth* by Stephen Cervantes
• Emotionally Healthy Spirituality* by Peter Scazzero
• Personal Ministry Consultation

Related Podcasts:

• PSR Bundle for Men: Emotional Growth
• How to Turn Emotional Triggers Into Opportunities for Growth
• For Men Who Want to Finish Strong

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I reconnect with KathyGrace Duncan, who briefly shares her remarkable journey of living as a man for 11 years before finding transformation and true identity in Christ. The bulk of our conversation focuses on what it means to move from “head knowledge” of identity in Christ to “heart belief,” exploring how God renews our minds and hearts through Scripture, prayer, and community. 

KathyGrace offers practical wisdom on embracing our true identity in Christ, overcoming old patterns, and living as those who are permanently loved by God. It’s an honest, hope-filled conversation about ongoing transformation and the freedom found in God’s love.

For more info on KathyGrace and navigating identity issues, visit PortlandFellowship.com and ChangedMovement.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Testimony of living as a man for 11 years despite being biologically female.
• Transformation and redemption through faith in Jesus Christ.
• Involvement in ministry work, particularly in women's and transgender ministry.
• Exploration of identity in Christ and its cultural and spiritual significance.
• Biblical perspectives on identity, referencing scriptures from 1 Peter, Ephesians, Galatians, and Romans.
• Concepts of the "old man" and the "new man" in relation to personal transformation.
• The process of renewing the mind and its importance in spiritual growth.
• Distinction between intellectual knowledge and heartfelt belief in God’s truth.
• The role of prayer and community in facilitating ongoing transformation.
• Encouragement to embrace one's identity in Christ and live out that truth.

More Resources:

• Identity: What Foundation Are You Building On?* by John Fort
• Identity in Christ* by Neil T. Anderson
• Love Thy Body* by Nancy Pearcey

Related Podcasts:

• Embracing God's Image in Gender
• Changed: The Amazing Transformation of a Former Lesbian Pastor
• Overcoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I welcome back Matthew  and Joanna Raabsmith to dive into their “Three Phases of Couple Recovery” model for healing from sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Together, we explore the Recovery, Restoration, and Renewal phases—discussing how couples can move from crisis and individual healing to rebuilding trust, intimacy, and shared purpose. 

Joanna and Matthew share practical tips, emphasize the importance of trauma-informed support, and encourage patience with the non-linear journey of recovery. Whether you’re just starting in recovery or seeking restoration and renewal for your relationship, their insights offer hope and guidance for every step of the process.

To learn more about Matthew and Joanna and their marriage resources, visit RaabsmithTeam.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The three phases of couple recovery: Recovery, Restoration, and Renewal.
• The Recovery phase focuses on individual healing and establishing safety after betrayal or addiction.
• The importance of trauma-informed support during the Recovery phase.
• The emotional intensity and relational work involved in the Restoration phase.
• The concept of "couple grieving" as a unified process for both partners.
• The role of forgiveness in the Restoration phase and its timing.
• The ongoing nature of the Restoration phase and the potential for revisiting earlier work.
• The Renewal phase as an opportunity to build a new relationship and shared purpose.
• The significance of designing rituals of connection and exploring shared dreams in the Renewal phase.
• The non-linear nature of recovery, emphasizing patience and awareness throughout the process.

Read Blog Post: The Three Phases of Couples Recovery - and What Kind of Help You Need in Each

More Resources:

• Renewing Us Couples Retreat (Nov 14-16)
• Couples and Individual Coaching
• Couples Group Program

Related Podcasts:

• Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal
• The Role of Boundaries in Marriage Restoration
• Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal

----------

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In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Juli Slattery to talk about sexual discipleship in parenting. Juli shares insights from her new book, "Surrendered Sexuality," and explains how sexual discipleship is an ongoing, grace-filled journey—much deeper than traditional sex education. 

We discuss the unique role parents play in shaping their kids’ understanding of sexuality, the importance of modeling both truth and grace, and how surrender, not perfection, is the goal. Juli encourages parents to embrace their own growth and trust God’s grace in the process. It’s a hopeful, practical conversation for every parent.

To learn more about Juli and get her resources, visit AuthenticIntimacy.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Definition and distinction between sexual discipleship and sex education.
• The role of parents as primary influencers in their children's understanding of sexuality.
• Importance of integrating biblical truth and grace in parenting.
• Goals of parenting from a biblical perspective, including passing on a godly heritage.
• The significance of daily life moments in teaching children about sexuality.
• The impact of cultural views on sexuality and the need for a biblical worldview.
• The concept of surrender in the context of sexual discipleship and parenting.
• The necessity for parents to engage in their own sexual discipleship journey.
• The importance of transparency and humility in parenting.
• Resources available for parents to support their journey in sexual discipleship.

More Resources:

• Surrendered Sexuality* by Dr. Juli Slattery
• Rethinking Sexuality* by Dr. Juli Slattery
• Critical Conversations (FREE online course)

Related Podcasts:

• What is Sexual Discipleship?
• The Sex Talk You Never Got
• Parenting in a Hypersexualized and Identity-Confused Culture

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

----------

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In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Stephen Cervantes to talk about the lifelong journey of emotional growth, especially for men. We introduce a practical tool—the phrase, “The God in me is bigger than the fear in you”—to help you stay centered and respond thoughtfully when facing criticism or negativity. 

We explore how compassion and faith can transform tough interactions, and encourage you to make this simple tool a habit for deeper emotional growth. Remember, you’re not alone on this journey. We’re here to support you as we all grow stronger and more resilient, together.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Emotional growth as a lifelong journey, particularly for men.
• The significance of practical tools for handling criticism and negativity.
• Introduction of the phrase: "The God in me is bigger than the fear in you" as an emotional growth tool.
• The importance of centering oneself and regulating emotions in challenging situations.
• Recognizing fear as a root cause of negative behavior in others.
• Encouraging compassion over combativeness when faced with attacks.
• Application of the emotional growth tool in various scenarios of criticism and insults.
• The effectiveness of the phrase as an internal statement rather than a verbal response.
• The role of faith in managing difficult interactions and emotional responses.
• Building a habit of emotional regulation through repetition of the phrase.

More Resources:

• Emotionally Healthy Spirituality* by Peter Scazzero
• Seven Desires* by Mark & Debra Laaser
• Find a Counselor

Related Podcasts:

• 50 Things to Do When Your Fear Gets Triggered
• How to Learn (and Respond to) Your Fear System
• Unoffendable: How Your Response to Criticism Affects Your Emotional Maturity

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with Garrett Kell, pastor and author of Pure in Heart: Sexual Sin and the Promises of God. Garrett opens up about his journey from struggling with sexual sin—even as a pastor—to finding freedom through confession, restoration, and God’s grace. 

We discuss the biblical meaning of purity, the importance of honesty and community, and practical ways to pursue God’s pleasures over fleeting temptations. Garrett’s story is honest and hope-filled, reminding us that real change is possible when we rely on Christ and walk in the light together.

You can get a copy of Garrett’s book, in English, Spanish, or Thai, at Crossway.org or Amazon.com*.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal journey of faith and struggles with sexual sin, including pornography.
• The process of confession, restoration, and ministry in pastoral leadership.
• Importance of honesty and transparency in overcoming sexual sin.
• Biblical foundation of purity and its definition as a heart orientation.
• Distinction between abstaining from sin and actively pursuing God.
• Practical examples for pursuing God's pleasures in daily life.
• The role of accountability and faith in God's promises.
• Understanding God's design for sex and its significance in marriage.
• Identifying and combating the enemies of purity: the flesh, the world, and the devil.
• The connection between identity in Christ and living a life of purity.

More Resources:

• Pure in Heart: Sexual Sin and the Promises of God* by Garrett Kell
• Help for Men
• Help for Women

Related Podcasts:

• Reframing How the Church Views Sexual Purity
• From Porn Pastor to Pure Desire
• The Heart Cry of an Old Saint: I Want to Be Clean!

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, I sit down with Emmanuel and Samridh, two amazing ministry leaders from India, to talk about their personal journeys of overcoming pornography addiction and how they now help pastors and young church leaders find freedom. 

We discuss the unique cultural challenges of shame and secrecy around sexuality in India, and how their Celebrate Freedom seminar, which is based on our Gateway to Freedom intensive for men, is breaking new ground by creating safe, supportive spaces for honest conversation and healing. Emmanuel and Samridh share practical insights, stories of hope, and invite anyone struggling to reach out for support and community.

To connect with Emmanuel and Samridh, visit their YouTube channel @unaddressed.podcast or Instagram @unaddressed.crew.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal stories of struggle with pornography addiction among ministry leaders.
• The cultural challenges of discussing sexuality and pornography in India, including shame and honor dynamics.
• The lack of practical counseling and support for pastors dealing with sexual sin.
• The importance of creating safe spaces for open discussions about struggles with pornography.
• The adaptation of recovery programs to fit the Indian cultural context, including the use of personal stories and relevant examples.
• The role of community and accountability in the recovery process.
• The impact of societal expectations on pastors' willingness to admit struggles.
• The need for ongoing support and follow-up after initial recovery programs.
• The significance of addressing both male and female perspectives in discussions about pornography and sexual exploitation.
• The message of hope and encouragement for those struggling with addiction, emphasizing connection and transparency.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive for men
• 40 Days of Purity for Men online course
• 40 Days of Purity for Women online course

Related Podcasts:

• Restoring Broken Pastors for Kingdom Use
• Navigating the 3 Stages of Recovery from Porn Addiction
• Can the Church Be a Safe Place for Healing and Transformation?

----------

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In this episode, I welcome back Vern Tompke to discuss the evolving challenges men face in recovering from pornography addiction. We dive into this concept of “edging”—using social media  or other kinds of media for arousal without fully acting out—and how today’s digital landscape complicates recovery. 

Vern shares his personal journey, practical strategies, and the importance of daily connection and removing triggers. Together, we explore the biological, emotional, and spiritual sides of addiction, emphasizing that true recovery isn’t just about avoidance, but about pursuing a richer, more connected life.

To learn more about Vern and the resources he has, visit BandofBrothers.care.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The concept of "edging" in relation to pornography addiction and recovery.
• Vern Tompke's personal journey with pornography addiction and his transition into helping others.
• The impact of social media platforms on recovery and the new challenges they present.
• The biological, emotional, and spiritual dimensions of addiction and recovery.
• The importance of daily connection and accountability in the recovery process.
• The distinction between "red," "yellow," and "green" behaviors in the context of recovery.
• The role of dopamine and intermittent reinforcement in addiction and recovery.
• The necessity of replacing unhealthy behaviors with positive activities.
• The misconception that recovery is solely about avoiding pornography.
• The long-term journey of recovery and the importance of pursuing a fulfilling life beyond addiction.

More Resources:

• Finding Traction Course
• Finding Traction Podcast
• Integrity Webinar for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Navigating the Three Stages of Recovery from Porn Addiction
• The Stopwatch Acting Out Cycle
• A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional Growth

----------

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In this episode, I welcome back Tammy Gustafson, a licensed counselor and betrayal trauma coach, to explore two really tough situations wives face after sexual betrayal: the “roommate scenario,” where the husband isn’t working on recovery, and “incomplete recovery,” where progress is inconsistent. 

Tammy shares heartfelt advice on setting boundaries, focusing on self-care, and shifting attention from the husband’s actions to the wife’s own healing. We discuss the importance of deep character change, not just behavior, and offer practical steps for finding support and reclaiming joy. 

If you can resonate with either (or both) of these scenarios, we want you to know that healing and thriving are possible, even in the midst of these challenging recovery circumstances.

To learn more about Tammy and her resources, visit BetrayalHealing.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of the "roommate scenario" where a wife remains in a marriage despite her husband's lack of commitment to recovery.
• Emotional challenges faced by wives in limbo due to financial dependence, children, or personal beliefs against divorce.
• Importance of establishing healthy boundaries and focusing on self-care for emotional well-being.
• The concept of "incomplete recovery," where the husband shows some effort but remains inconsistent, causing confusion and pain for the wife.
• The emotional toll of navigating uncertainty and mixed signals in the recovery process.
• Distinction between sobriety and deeper character transformation necessary for true healing.
• Encouragement for wives to set high expectations for their husband's recovery, looking for genuine changes in behavior and character.
• The role of curiosity and new language from husbands as indicators of real progress in recovery.
• Practical advice for wives on maintaining clarity, protecting their hearts, and seeking support from safe individuals.
• Resources and support available for women dealing with betrayal and navigating their healing journey.

More Resources:

• Betrayal Healing Coaching with Tammy
• Wives Care Groups for Betrayal Trauma Healing
• Basics Webinar for Wives

Related Podcasts:

• The Need for Safety in Betrayal Trauma Healing
• Identifying and Meeting Needs in a Betrayed Wife
• The Recovery Process for Couples

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In today’s episode, we welcome back Karla Downing for an insightful conversation about healing relationships. Together, we dive into practical ways couples can improve communication, rebuild intimacy, and navigate challenges like addiction and dysfunctional patterns. 

Karla shares wisdom on speaking the truth in love, managing emotions, and fostering empathy and curiosity. We discuss the importance of patience, seeking outside support, and grounding our efforts in grace and compassion. Whether you’re facing tough seasons or just want to grow closer, this episode offers hope, encouragement, and actionable steps for building a healthier, more connected relationship.

To learn more about Karla and her resources, visit ChangeMyRelationship.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Practical advice for couples facing relational struggles
• Importance of communication in building intimacy
• Managing emotions and maintaining patience during healing
• Speaking the truth in love and expressing personal truths
• Challenges such as defensiveness and reactivity in communication
• Role of mutual curiosity and understanding between partners
• Emotional maturity and its impact on relationship dynamics
• Strategies for effective communication and conflict resolution
• The significance of seeking outside help and support
• The process of healing and restoration in relationships affected by addiction and dysfunction

More Resources:

• Nine Keys to Successful Marital Conflict Resolution
• When Love Hurts: 10 Principles to Transform Difficult Relationships
• Speaking the Truth in Love

Related Podcasts:

• Eight Practical Steps of Forgiveness
• Intimacy in Marriage: Why Being Fully Known and Loved Matters
• Working Through Emotional Disconnection in Marriage

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In this episode, Dr. Steven Cervantes and I explore the lifelong mission of personal growth, blending both spiritual and emotional development. We discuss how a vibrant relationship with God brings peace, rest, and joy, and why emotional health is just as vital as spiritual growth. 

Together, we unpack the impact of childhood wounds, the roles we play to cope, and the importance of self-care. Our conversation is honest and encouraging, inviting you to embrace growth as a lifelong journey marked by grace, healing, and authentic connection with God and others.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of the concept of "mission" in personal growth, integrating spiritual and emotional development.
• Importance of a relational connection with God over rigid religious structures.
• Challenges of maintaining spiritual and emotional health and their interconnectedness.
• The impact of loneliness in modern society and the role of faith communities in fostering connection.
• Definition of a spiritual mission rooted in faith, teachings of Jesus, and community participation.
• Recognition of emotional struggles that can undermine spiritual commitments.
• The idea of a "growth mission" as a continuous journey rather than a fixed goal.
• Discussion of emotional wounds from childhood and their impact on present life.
• Examination of coping mechanisms and roles that may hinder genuine emotional growth.
• Emphasis on the importance of self-love and care as foundational to loving others and spiritual growth.

More Resources:

• 49 Days of Growth: Growing in Emotional Skills* by Dr. Stephen Cervantes
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive Workshop
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups

Related Podcasts:

• What Can Stunt Your Emotional Growth Mission?
• Why Must I Learn Me?
• Men's Emotional Self-Awareness Test

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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----------

In this episode, I sit down with Tabitha Westbrook, a licensed therapist and author, to talk about her book Body and Soul, Healed and Whole. Tabitha shares her personal journey as a survivor and her passion for helping others heal from trauma, abuse, and coercive control. 

We explore the impact of purity culture, misconceptions about abuse, and the importance of safety and healthy boundaries. Tabitha offers practical wisdom for individuals and churches, encouraging honest conversations and compassionate support for survivors seeking healing and wholeness.

To learn more about Tabitha, her counseling resources, and book, visit TabithaWestbrook.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of healthy sexuality after trauma and abuse
• Personal experiences of survivors and their healing journeys
• Discussion of complex trauma, domestic abuse, and coercive control
• Impact of purity culture on men and women within the church
• Nuances of female sexual brokenness and addiction
• Definition and implications of coercive control in relationships
• Misconceptions about abuse and the ineffectiveness of common responses
• Importance of prioritizing victim safety over preserving marriages
• Need for church education and accountability programs for abusers
• Emphasis on holistic healing that integrates body and soul in recovery processes

More Resources:

• Body & Soul, Healed & Whole* by Tabitha Westbrook
• Wives Care Online Groups
• Strong Like Water* by Aundi Kolber

Related Podcasts:

• Help and Hope for Women to Heal from Sexual Abuse
• The Need for Safety in Betrayal Trauma Healing
• The Need for Boundaries After Betrayal

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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----------

In this episode, I sit down with Sam Black, Director of Recovery Education at CovenantEyes, to explore the journey of online accountability and recovery from pornography. Sam shares how Covenant Eyes has evolved over 25 years, shifting from simple filtering to a relational, ally-based approach. 

We then dive into CovenantEyes’ Victory app and its features, including emotional check-ins, family management, and supportive courses for men, women, and parents. Sam also announces a special book giveaway and encourages listeners to take the next step toward freedom with these practical, faith-based resources.

To get access to all of CovenantEyes’ resources, visit CovenantEyes.com. (And use code bebroken to try out their services free for 30 days.)

FREE BOOK GIVEAWAY!

Sam agree to give away 10 FREE copies of his book, The Healing Church. To get your free copy, send an email to psr@bebroken.org and put "FREE Healing Church Book" in the subject line. First 10 respondents will get a free copy.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• History and mission of Covenant Eyes, focusing on relational accountability.
• Evolution of terminology from "accountability" to "ally" to foster supportive relationships.
• Development and features of the Victory app as a companion tool for recovery.
• Importance of educational resources and community support in overcoming pornography addiction.
• Challenges faced in app development, including technological and platform guidelines.
• Overview of the app's functionality, including accountability reports and communication features.
• Accessibility of the Victory app for both men and women, addressing diverse needs.
• Introduction of new features like the check-in process for emotional monitoring and progress tracking.
• Emphasis on viewing relapses as learning opportunities rather than failures.
• Availability of additional resources, such as the Strive 21 program and the book The Healing Church.

More Resources:

• Victory App by CovenantEyes
• STRIVE: 21-Day Porn Detox
• Find a Support Group

Related Podcasts:

• Porn, Technology, and Self-Control
• How Group Work Will Transform Your Recovery Journey
• Beyond the Porn Phenomenon: Barna Group Research on Porn Use

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In this episode, we welcome back Lyschel Burket, Executive Director of Hope Redefined, a ministry for wives facing sexual betrayal trauma. Lyschel shares updates about her work, including a new 45-week healing curriculum, and then we dive deep into the complexities of betrayal trauma, misplaced hope, and the journey toward true healing. 

Lyschel offers wisdom from her own story, emphasizing the importance of finding safety, authentic community, and hope in Christ—not just in a spouse’s recovery. It’s an insightful, practical conversation for anyone seeking restoration after deep relational wounds.

To learn more about Lyschel and her ministry resources, visit HopeRedefined.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of sexual betrayal trauma and its impact on wives and women.
• Introduction of the "Abiding in Hope" curriculum aimed at supporting healing in community.
• Definition and exploration of betrayal trauma, particularly in the context of marriage.
• Examination of the complexities of trust and the challenges faced in the healing process.
• Analysis of misplaced hope in husbands' recovery and the implications for personal healing.
• Identification of common coping mechanisms and responses to betrayal trauma.
• Emphasis on the importance of establishing safety and stabilization as foundational for healing.
• Insights on the role of community in the healing journey and the need for authenticity.
• Practical steps for women to rebuild their relationship with God and redefine hope.
• Encouragement for women to embrace their healing journey and recognize progress over time.

More Resources:

• Finding Hope Support Group
• Abiding in Hope Online Group
• Wives Care Online Groups

Related Podcasts:

• Hope After Betrayal
• Liminal Space: Helping Wives Transition from Betrayal to Hope
• The Need for Boundaries After Betrayal

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In this episode, Dr. Stephen Cervantes joins me in our brand-new studio to discuss how couples get stuck in emotional cycles of conflict, drawing on Sue Johnson’s Emotionally Focused Therapy. We explore how triggers, core fears, and attachment styles—like the classic pursuer and withdrawer dynamic—shape our reactions and create distance in marriage. 

Together, we talk about the importance of self-awareness, grace, and integrating emotional and spiritual growth to break these patterns and build deeper connections. We also highlight the 5 stages that happen in conflict, which are: 

1. Trigger
2. Body symptom
3. Emotional response
4. Belief response
5. Action

This is an insightful, practical conversation for anyone wanting healthier, more loving relationships.

For daily thoughts from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of relationship conflict and emotional loops based on Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT).
• Exploration of emotional responses and core fears that contribute to conflict in marriages.
• Explanation of the cycle of triggering events, body responses, emotional reactions, beliefs, and final actions in relationships.
• The impact of attachment theory on adult relationships and the dynamics of pursuer and withdrawer roles.
• Importance of self-awareness and understanding personal emotional patterns to break cycles of conflict.
• The connection between emotional understanding and spiritual growth, emphasizing grace in relationships.
• Encouragement for couples to create new patterns of connection and support each other.
• Closing thoughts on the significance of building a strong, loving attachment in relationships.

More Resources:

• Hold Me Tight* by Dr. Sue Johnson
• Find a Counselor
• Understanding Emotionally Focused Therapy

Related Podcasts:

• Conflict Management for Marriages Healing from Betrayal
• The Harms of Negative Talking
• Assumptions vs. Communication: The Battle for Relational Harmony

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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----------

In this episode, I welcome my friend and colleague, Dr. Stephen Cervantes, to our cozy new “barn office” studio for a real and raw conversation about breaking old, harmful habits—especially those rooted in childhood. Together, we explore how these habits form as coping mechanisms, the emotional battles involved in letting them go, and the importance of kindness toward our younger selves. 

We discuss faith, the power of emotional connection, and practical steps for real change. Our desire is to help men grow in integrity and relationships. So, we invite you to join us as we encourage each other to pursue healthier, more loving ways of living.

For daily thoughts from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of old and potentially harmful habits developed from childhood experiences.
• Exploration of habits as coping mechanisms for emotional and relational challenges.
• The emotional impact of habits on personal growth and relationships.
• The importance of self-compassion and kindness towards one's younger self.
• The struggle involved in breaking free from ingrained habits.
• The role of fear and survival in the formation of bad habits.
• The necessity of replacing bad habits with healthier alternatives.
• The significance of emotional connection and reciprocity in relationships.
• The influence of community and shared experiences in overcoming bad habits.
• Resources for personal growth and emotional development, particularly for men.

More Resources:

• Men's Integrity Webinar (free)
• Critical Conversations online course (free)
• 40 Days of Purity for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Breaking Free from Your Secret Habit
• Replacing Escaping and Hiding with Healthy Thoughts and Behaviors
• Breaking Free with Russell Willingham

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----------

In today’s episode, I chat with Trevor Hanson, a coach and founder of The Art of Healing. He teaches relationship and attachment skills through the Secure Self Club. Trevor opens up about his personal journey, sharing how his own struggles inspired his work. 

We discuss the origins and fluidity of attachment styles, practical steps to move from anxious to secure attachment, and the importance of self-compassion in healing. Trevor introduces his TEMPO framework and offers resources to help you take your next step toward secure attachments. I found it to be an insightful, encouraging conversation for anyone wanting to better understand themselves and build healthier relationships.

To learn more about Trevor and his resources, visit TheArtofHealingbyTrevor.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal journey of Trevor with anxious attachment
• Influence of attachment styles on relationships
• Overview of different attachment styles and their origins
• Importance of understanding attachment dynamics in personal development
• Fluidity of attachment styles and the potential for change
• Signs and symptoms of anxious attachment
• The cycle of anxious attachment and its impact on behavior
• Strategies for moving from anxious to secure attachment
• The role of emotional experiences in healing attachment issues
• Resources and support for individuals seeking to address attachment-related challenges

More Resources:

• From Anxious to Secure (free seminar)
• Sex and Anxiety (online course)
• Know Your Boundaries (free workshop)

Related Podcasts:

• Understanding Your "Flipped Out" Brain
• Moving from Being Fear-Driven to Love-Driven
• How Early Development Trauma Shapes Addiction and Recovery

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In this episode, we have back with us on the program Dr. Eddie Capparucci, counselor and co-author of Going Deeper for the Betrayed Partner.* Our topic of conversation is to explore the journey of healing from betrayal trauma, especially for women who have experienced infidelity. 

Dr. Eddie shares his unique inner child model, helping us understand how past wounds shape our emotional responses today. Together, we discuss practical tools for managing difficult feelings, the importance of self-compassion, and how both partners can support each other on the path to recovery. It’s an honest, hopeful conversation about reclaiming your sense of self and finding healing after deep hurt.

For more information about Dr. Eddie and his resources, visit AbundantLifeCounselingGA.com or search for “Going Deeper books” on Amazon.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Definition and significance of betrayal trauma, particularly in marital relationships.
• The emotional impact of infidelity on individuals, especially women.
• Introduction and explanation of the inner child model as a therapeutic approach.
• The connection between unresolved childhood wounds and adult emotional responses.
• Differentiation between sexual betrayal and other forms of betrayal (e.g., financial, emotional).
• The importance of recognizing and nurturing the inner child for healing.
• Strategies for managing emotions and shifting from emotional responses to rational thinking.
• Addressing common objections and validating emotions while assessing their accuracy.
• Encouragement for both partners in a relationship affected by betrayal to support each other.
• Resources and tools for further exploration of betrayal trauma and inner child work.

More Resources:

• Going Deeper for the Betrayed Partner*
• Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction*
• Wives Care Online Groups

Related Podcasts:

• Emotional Transformation Therapy for Betrayed Wives
• Betrayal Trauma Healing (PSR Podcast Bundle)
• Helping a Wife Heal

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

----------

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----------

In this episode, I sit down with one of our favorite guests, Cat Etherington from the Naked Truth Project to explore how early developmental trauma shapes addiction and relationships. Cat shares her personal recovery story and explains how childhood experiences—both big and small—can impact our sense of self and coping strategies. 

We discuss the importance of understanding both our emotional memories and objective truths, and why healing means digging deep into our pasts. Together, we encourage listeners to move beyond blame and embrace the journey toward genuine healing and freedom.

Visit NakedTruthProject.com for resources from Cat and her team.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Impact of early developmental trauma on addiction and relationships
• Definition and categorization of developmental trauma: "big T" and "little t" traumas
• Coping mechanisms developed in response to unresolved trauma
• Connection between developmental trauma and addiction behaviors
• Importance of identity formation in recovery from addiction
• Navigating subjective versus objective realities in parenting and child development
• The role of emotional experiences in shaping self-perception and behavior
• Healing processes involving revisiting childhood experiences and narratives
• Moving beyond blame to understand personal experiences and emotions
• Encouragement for confronting past traumas as a pathway to healing and recovery

More Resources:

• Find a Counselor
• Intensive for Men
• Intensive for Women

Related Podcasts:

• The Interplay of Body, Mind, and Spirit in Porn Addiction Recovery
• Addressing Childhood Trauma in Men
• The Immanuel Approach in Recovery

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----------

In this episode, I sit down with Matt Cline from Restored Ministries to talk about what it means to have a Jesus-centered sexuality. We explore how inviting Jesus into our struggles with sexual brokenness—like addiction, infidelity, or shame—can lead to real healing and freedom. 

Matt shares practical steps, personal stories, and encouragement for anyone feeling stuck, reminding us that Jesus offers hope, grace, and transformation. We also discuss the importance of open conversations in the church and share resources for those seeking support on their journey to wholeness.

To learn more about Matt and the resources from his ministry, visit RestoredMinistries.ca.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Concept of "Jesus-centered sexuality"
• Importance of placing Jesus at the core of sexual desires and experiences
• Focus on helping individuals overcome sexual brokenness, including pornography addiction and infidelity
• The role of emotional trauma in sexual struggles and the need for healing through a relationship with Jesus
• Spiritual understanding of sexuality versus worldly perspectives
• The significance of inviting Jesus into moments of temptation and desire
• Practical steps for cultivating a Jesus-centered life, particularly in sexuality
• The impact of shame and guilt on pursuing a Jesus-centered approach
• The promise of freedom and hope in overcoming sexual sin
• Resources and support available for individuals seeking healing and wholeness through faith

More Resources:

• 40 Days of Purity for Men (online course)
• 40 Days of Purity for Women (online course)
• Church & Sexuality Survey

Related Podcasts:

• Overcoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity
• Can the Church Be a Safe Place for Healing and Transformation?
• The Power of Community

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----------

In today’s episode, which I think is appropriate to release on Independence Day, I sit down with Mike Mudry as he bravely shares his journey through pornography addiction and its impact on his marriage. We talk openly about the pain of living a double life, the relief that comes with honesty, and the life-changing power of community and accountability. 

Mike’s story is raw and real—he reminds us that healing happens when we’re vulnerable and supported by others. I hope his experience encourages you to seek authentic connection and take your own next step toward wholeness and freedom.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Mike Mudry's personal journey of recovery from pornography addiction.
• Early exposure to pornography and its impact on Mike's understanding of sexuality.
• The emotional challenges faced in marriage due to hidden struggles with addiction.
• The revelation of Mike's secret behaviors and its effect on his relationship with his wife.
• The importance of seeking help and accountability in the recovery process.
• The role of group work and community support in overcoming personal challenges.
• The concept of true accountability and its significance in personal growth.
• The journey from living a double life to embracing authenticity and honesty.
• The necessity of community in the healing process and the dangers of isolation.
• Encouragement for others to seek supportive groups and take risks in their recovery journey.

More Resources:

• Find a Group
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• 40 Days of Purity Online Course

Related Podcasts:

• How Group Work Will Transform Your Recovery Journey
• One Year Later
• Men Helping Men Grow and Mature

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In this episode, Stephen Cervantes and I explore the idea of men being “under sad”—when we struggle to recognize or express sadness. We talk about why grieving is essential for emotional health, not just in big losses but in everyday disappointments. 

Stephen shares some practical ways to support others in their sadness and encourages us to embrace vulnerability, compassion, and even prayer. Together, we explore that facing our sadness leads to deeper connection, healing, and a more restful, authentic life.

For daily thoughts from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The concept of being "under sad" and its implications for emotional awareness, particularly among men.
• The significance of grieving as a necessary process for emotional health and personal growth.
• Societal norms that discourage men from expressing sadness, leading to emotional suppression.
• The dual nature of strength and vulnerability in navigating emotions.
• The importance of integrating grieving into daily life as a means of processing emotions.
• The role of sadness in fostering deeper connections and empathy with others.
• Practical advice for supporting others in their moments of grief and sadness.
• The concept of compassion as "suffering with" someone and its importance in healing.
• The potential of prayer and spiritual connection in processing sadness and finding solace.
• A call to action for individuals to embrace their sadness for emotional wholeness and fulfillment.

More Resources:

• A Sacred Sorrow* by Michael Card
• Gentle and Lowly* by Dane Ortlund
• Emotional Training for Men (Grieving)

Related Podcasts:

• Sadness and Hope - The Dynamic Duo of Personal Growth
• Men's Emotional Self-Awareness Test
• Why Men Need to Practice Sadness

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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----------

In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Carol Tanksley to explore the true meaning of intimacy—beyond just sexuality. Dr. Carol shares updates about her ministry’s amazing new space for healing and intensives, called Transformation Place. 

In our conversation, we discuss the universal need for connection with God and others. Dr. Carol offers practical steps for building deeper relationships, overcoming fear and shame, and embracing vulnerability. 

We also highlight several resources for anyone seeking healing from sexual brokenness. 

To check out some of these resources from Carol, visit DrCarolMinistries.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of the significance of intimacy in human relationships.
• Discussion on the connection between intimacy, sexuality, and sexual brokenness.
• Updates on Dr. Tankersley's ministry and the establishment of a new physical space for events.
• Definition of intimacy as "seeing and being seen, knowing and being known."
• Importance of relational intimacy beyond sexual intimacy.
• Identification of common obstacles to experiencing true intimacy, such as shame and emotional walls.
• Practical steps for cultivating intimacy with God and others.
• Emphasis on the value of vulnerability and authenticity in relationships.
• Discussion of non-sexual aspects of intimacy, including sensory experiences and physical touch.
• Resources and tools for further support in the journey toward intimacy and healing.

More Resources:

• A 5-Step Prescription for Sexual Healing - God's Way
• Online Sexpectations Course
• In-Person Small Group Intensives

Related Podcasts:

• Exploring the Heart of Sexuality with Dr. Carol Tanksley
• What Are Your Sexpectations?
• What is Oneness and Why Does It Matter in Your Life?

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In this episode, I sit down with Nick Stumbo, director of Pure Desire Ministries, for an honest conversation about sexual brokenness and the impact of pornography, especially within the Christian community. We dive into new research from Pure Desire and the Barna Group, titled Beyond the Porn Phenomenon, revealing surprising trends and the ongoing struggle many face in silence. 

Nick shares insights from the research on breaking shame, creating safe spaces in churches, and practical ways parents and leaders can support healthy conversations about sexuality. Together, we explore how compassion and openness can lead to real healing and hope.

To learn more and get a copy of the research mentioned in this episode, visit PureDesire.org/barna.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of sexual brokenness, particularly related to pornography use.
• Personal experiences of a pastor struggling with pornography.
• Overview of the research project "Beyond the Porn Phenomenon" conducted with the Barna Group.
• Examination of updated data on pornography use and its effects on individuals and relationships.
• Challenges faced by churches in addressing sexual brokenness and providing support.
• Development of resources for parents and youth leaders to discuss sexuality with teenagers.
• Insights into the disconnect between spiritual health and sexual behavior among Christians.
• Statistics highlighting the prevalence of pornography use and the lack of support for individuals struggling with it.
• The importance of creating safe spaces in churches for open discussions about sexual issues.
• Encouragement for proactive engagement in conversations about sexuality and support for those in need.

More Resources:

• Beyond the Porn Phenomenon Church Toolkit
• Free eBook: 5 Steps to Freedom from Porn
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men

Related Podcasts:

• New Research on Why Women View Porn
• What Can We Learn from Lust?
• Understanding God's Design for Sex in Today's Confused Culture

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In this episode, I sit down again with Phil and Priscilla Fretwell to explore what true intimacy in marriage really means. Together, we unpack how family backgrounds, vulnerability, and faith shape our ability to be fully known and fully loved. 

Phil and Priscilla share their honest journey through their marriage struggles, healing, and the importance of spiritual and emotional connection—not just physical closeness. 

We also touch on how intimacy matters for everyone, married or single. Join us for an honest, heartfelt conversation about growing closer, supporting each other, and finding wholeness in our relationships.

To learn more about Phil and Priscilla and their resources for couples, visit SavageMarriageMinistries.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The significance of intimacy in marriage and relationships.
• The evolution of understanding intimacy from a religious to a spiritual perspective.
• Misconceptions surrounding intimacy, particularly the equating of intimacy with sexual activity.
• The influence of family backgrounds on perceptions of intimacy.
• The impact of secrets and emotional barriers on relationships.
• The journey of recovery and healing in the context of intimacy.
• The role of vulnerability in fostering deeper connections.
• The purpose of intimacy in modeling love and support within families.
• The relevance of intimacy for singles and its application beyond marriage.
• Resources for further exploration of intimacy and relationship dynamics.

More Resources:

• Savage Marriage* by Phil & Priscilla Fretwell
• Savage Marriage Study Guide* by Phil & Priscilla Fretwell
• Coaching with Phil & Priscilla

Related Podcasts:

• A Journey of Redemption and Healing
• The Deep-Rooted Marriage: Cultivating Intimacy, Healing, and Delight
• God, Sex, and Your Marriage

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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----------

In today’s episode, I welcome back Garry Ingraham from Love and Truth Network to discuss the challenges of parenting in a hypersexualized culture. We dive into the importance of modeling healthy, godly behaviors and values, and how parents can create a nurturing environment for their children. 

Garry shares insights from his ministry, emphasizing the need for open communication and proactive measures in addressing identity and sexuality issues. We also explore the biblical perspective on parenting, encouraging parents to embrace their role with faith and hope, fostering a supportive environment for their children's growth and identity development.

To learn about the resources Garry offers, visit LoveAndTruthNetwork.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Challenges parents face in a hypersexualized culture
• Importance of parental roles in shaping children's identities
• Biblical perspective on parenting and its significance
• Creating a positive family culture and environment
• Navigating identity issues in children
• Open communication between parents and children
• Addressing topics like pornography and sexuality with children
• The role of personal accountability and growth for parents
• Encouragement for overwhelmed parents
• Resources and support for parents from organizations like Love and Truth Network

More Resources:

• Love and Truth Network Summits
• Six Critical Conversations to Have With Your Kids
• God's Design for Sex Series* by Stan and Brenna Jones

Related Podcasts:

• PSR Podcast Bundle for Families on Identity
• Navigating Identity and Sexuality: A Compassionate Approach for Parents
• How Parents Can Leverage their Story of Brokenness to Help Their Kids Pursue Integrity

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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We explore the connection between physical well-being and mental health, emphasizing how activities like exercise and journaling can aid recovery. Sathiya also highlights the importance of understanding one's identity and purpose, offering practical steps for overcoming shame and fostering a healthier lifestyle. Join us for a powerful and inspiring conversation on whole-man healing.

For more information on Sathiya and his resources, visit DeepCleanCoaching.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal journey of recovery from pornography addiction
• Ineffective solutions encountered during the recovery process
• Shift in focus from eliminating pornography to personal growth and spiritual development
• Connection between recovery, physical well-being, and mental health
• Importance of identity and purpose in the recovery journey
• The impact of physical activities on emotional states and lifestyle choices
• Neurochemical aspects of recovery and the concept of "red zone" vs. "green zone"
• Overcoming shame associated with body image and sexuality
• Practical steps for fostering a healthy relationship with one's body
• The significance of valuing one's body for enhancing relationships and personal fulfillment

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Groups
• The Last Relapse* by Sathiya Sam

Related Podcasts:

• The Last Relapse with Sathiya Sam
• Helping Men Overcome Porn and Get Emotionally Fit
• Keys to Long-Term Freedom from Unwanted Behaviors

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, Stephen Cervantes and I dive into the crucial topic of expectations in marriage, focusing on the difference between assumed and discussed expectations. We share lots of personal stories and insights, highlighting how unspoken assumptions can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts. 

Our conversation focuses on the importance of open communication and dialogue to foster a healthier relationship. I reflect on my own marriage, illustrating how discussing expectations can transform a relationship from merely coexisting to truly sharing life. We encourage you, if you’re married, to engage in meaningful discussions about expectations to avoid the pitfalls of unspoken assumptions.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The distinction between assumed expectations and discussed expectations in marriage.
• The impact of unspoken assumptions on misunderstandings and conflicts in relationships.
• The importance of open communication and dialogue in addressing expectations.
• Personal anecdotes illustrating the challenges of navigating expectations in marriage.
• The influence of family backgrounds on partners' expectations and roles.
• The collaborative process of navigating expectations as a couple.
• The necessity of ongoing discussions about expectations as relationships evolve.
• The role of awareness and perception in understanding each other's viewpoints.
• Strategies for initiating meaningful discussions about expectations in marriage.
• The overall message that couples are better together through intentional communication and collaboration.

More Resources:

• The Deep-Rooted Marriage* by Dan Allender and Steve Call
• Renewing Us Couples Retreat
• Find a Counselor or Coach

Related Podcasts:

• Breaking Down Barriers: The Art of Active Listening
• The Deep-Rooted Marriage: Cultivating Intimacy, Healing, and Delight
• 4 Skills to Transform Your Marriage

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, we invite back one of our favorite counselors, Jessica McDaniel, who runs a private practice in Austin, TX with her husband, Ryan. We dive into the crucial collaboration between therapists and pastors, especially when helping couples deal with infidelity and betrayal trauma. 

Jessica shares how both therapeutic and pastoral support are essential for comprehensive healing. We discuss the importance of creating safe environments, clear communication, and breaking down the stigma around mental health in church settings. Jessica also offers practical advice for building strong, collaborative relationships between therapists and church leaders to better support couples in crisis.

To learn more about Jessica and Ryan’s counseling practice, visit McDanielCounseling.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Collaboration between therapists and pastors in addressing infidelity and betrayal trauma.
• The importance of integrating therapeutic and pastoral support for couples.
• Challenges individuals face in choosing between confiding in a pastor or a therapist.
• The divide between "church life" and therapeutic needs, and its impact on seeking help.
• Creating a safe environment for individuals to discuss sensitive issues with church leaders.
• The necessity of dual support from both therapists and pastors for couples in crisis.
• Addressing misconceptions and biases between therapists and pastors.
• The role of communication and regular updates in collaborative support.
• The stigma surrounding mental health issues in church settings and the need for normalization.
• Encouraging proactive relationship-building between therapists and church leaders for better support networks.

More Resources:

• Find a Counselor
• Couples Intensives
• Church Resources

Related Podcasts:

• Becoming a Healing Church
• Talking About Taboo (with Mike Novotny)
• Can the Church Be a Safe Place for Healing and Transformation?

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In this episode, Dr. Stephen Cervantes and I discuss the emotional and spiritual awakening journey for men. We explore the challenges of emotional disconnect and the impact of societal expectations on men's emotional health. 

Stephen shares insights on moving from hiddenness and brokenness to a fuller life in Christ. We emphasize the importance of expressing needs and feelings, and the courage it takes to wake up emotionally. 

We share our own personal stories and practical advice in hopes to inspire men to connect more deeply with their emotions and relationships. Men, we invite you to join us on the journey of emotional and spiritual growth. 

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Emotional and spiritual awakening for men
• The journey from emotional disconnect to deeper engagement
• Coping mechanisms and their impact on emotional health
• The significance of expressing needs and feelings
• Societal expectations and their influence on men's emotional well-being
• The transition from hiddenness and brokenness to a fuller life
• The challenges men face in recognizing and articulating their emotions
• The role of relationships in emotional growth and healing
• The dangers of living in isolation and avoiding vulnerability
• Encouragement for men to embrace their emotions and seek deeper connections

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Groups for Men
• 40 Days of Training for Your Soul

Related Podcasts:

• The Moment of Awakening
• Helping Men Practice Self-Awareness to Build Stronger Relationships
• Mr. Unemotional: Moving from Isolation to Connection

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In this episode, I chat with Hadley Baker, who courageously shares his journey through sexual addiction and its impact on his life as a pastor. Hadley opens up about his childhood trauma as the result of an unwanted pregnancy, believing he was unlovable. Then came the early onset of his addiction to pornography and the eventual internal conflict of living a double life while in ministry. 

He recounts pivotal moments, such as his spiritual awakening, the challenges in his marriage, and his path to healing through counseling and truly understanding God's love. 

We also highlight the importance of authenticity and open discussions within the church to support anyone struggling with unwanted sexual behaviors. Hadley’s story is a powerful reminder of the need for grace, hope, and compassion.

To learn more about Hadley and get his book, No Longer a Slave, visit HadleyBaker.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal journey of sexual addiction and its impact on life as a pastor.
• Importance of discussing sensitive topics like addiction within the church.
• Influence of childhood trauma and family dynamics on self-worth and identity.
• Early exposure to pornography and its role in developing compulsive behaviors.
• Spiritual awakening and commitment to faith as a turning point.
• Struggles with living a double life while in ministry.
• Escalation of addiction and the cycle of shame and secrecy.
• The significance of counseling and understanding God's love in the healing process.
• Transition back into ministry after overcoming addiction and personal struggles.
• Advocacy for creating safe spaces in churches for open discussions about addiction and personal challenges.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• The Healing Church* by Sam Black
• SheRecovery: Porn Addiction Support for Women

Related Podcasts:

• From Porn Pastor to Pure Desire
• Reframing How the Church Views Sexual Purity
• Addressing Childhood Trauma in Men

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, we have back on the program our friend and colleague Andrew Arthur, a mediator specializing in faith-based mediation, to talk about the delicate topic of separation in relationships and how to navigate them with hope. We delve specifically into therapeutic separation, which is a process aimed at healing and potentially reuniting couples facing serious challenges like infidelity and sexual brokenness. 

Andrew highlights the importance of having a support team, including counselors, mediators, and spiritual advisors, to collectively guide this tough journey for couples. We also discuss the emotional and operational aspects of separation, the need for individual care, and the crucial role of safety and trust in working towards reconciliation. It's a hopeful and insightful conversation for anyone facing relational struggles.

For more information about Andrew and his resources, visit GenesisChristianMediation.com.

Topics Covered in the Episode:

• Definition and understanding of therapeutic separation in relationships.
• The role and importance of a support team during separation.
• Common reasons for couples to consider separation, including infidelity and communication breakdown.
• Establishing ground rules and expectations during the separation process.
• Overcoming obstacles to reunification, such as differing parenting styles and conflict patterns.
• The significance of safety and trust in relationships during separation.
• Steps toward reunification and the importance of joint work and assessments.
• The value of commitment to the therapeutic process and early intervention.
• The concept of forgiveness as a personal journey in healing.
• Resources and support available for couples navigating separation and reconciliation.

More Resources:

• Restoration Therapy* by Dr. Terry Hargrave
• DisclosureHope.com
• Find a Counselor

Related Podcasts:

• Conflict Management for Marriages Healing from Betrayal
• The Role of Boundaries in Marriage Restoration
• Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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In this episode, Stephen and I explore the profound concept of "oneness," touching on its dimensions of belonging, connection, unity, and intimacy. We discuss how oneness is essential in relationships with family, spouses, and God, emphasizing the importance of vulnerability and mutual understanding. 

We highlight the very real challenges and rewards of pursuing true oneness; it isn’t like flipping a switch and you will automatically achieve oneness. Oneness is a journey of growth and self-discovery. We invite you to reflect on your own relationships and seek deeper connections in your life. It’s a mission worth the journey.

To get daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of the concept of "oneness" and its complexities.
• Discussion of belonging, connection, unity, and intimacy.
• The significance of personal experiences in understanding oneness.
• The role of vulnerability and mutual understanding in fostering deeper connections.
• The relationship between oneness and one's connection with family, spouses, and God.
• The importance of open communication and trust in relationships.
• The idea of oneness as a love story and a journey of self-awareness.
• The theological perspective on oneness, particularly in relation to marriage and divine connection.
• Reflection on the ongoing journey of growth and understanding in relationships.
• Encouragement for listeners to seek deeper connections and explore barriers to oneness.

More Resources:

• Free Men's Integrity Webinar
• Free Wives Betrayal Trauma Healing Webinar
• Sacred Marriage* by Gary Thomas

Related Podcasts:

• Are You a Loner or Connector in Relationships?
• Unlocking Greatness: Why Emotional Connections Matter More than Success
• Living More than a Love Story

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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Emily shares her perspective, detailing the confusion and pain she experienced, as well as her unwavering faith in their marriage’s potential for healing. Together, they discuss their path to recovery, the importance of honesty, and their mission to help others through their podcast, "Beyond Broken Vows." Their story is a powerful testament to redemption and hope.

If you are in a marriage that has experienced infidelity or other kinds of sexual betrayal, this episode will help you discover hope and insights for healing and restoration.

For more information about Johnny and Emily and their ministry, visit BeyondBrokenVows.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The impact of early exposure to pornography on personal development.
• The struggles and consequences of sex addiction within a marriage.
• The dynamics of anger and emotional turmoil in relationships.
• The process of deception and gaslighting in the context of addiction.
• The journey of healing and recovery from infidelity.
• The importance of open communication and honesty in rebuilding trust.
• The role of faith and spirituality in overcoming personal challenges.
• The significance of support networks and community in recovery.
• The decision to share personal stories to help others facing similar issues.
• The transformation of a relationship through vulnerability and shared experiences.

More Resources:

• Beyond Broken Vows Podcast
• Recovery Coaching with Johnny and Emily
• DisclosureHope.com

Related Podcasts:

• Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal
• Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal
• How Can Therapeutic Disclosure Help Heal Marriages Affected by Sexual Betrayal

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Bret also emphasizes the need for personal vulnerability, authentic connections, and creating safe spaces for men to share their full stories. His own story is an incredible reminder of the transformative power of God’s presence in our lives.

Learn more about Bret on his YouTube channel: @whylivetoday.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Bret Marshall's journey of faith and personal transformation.
• The significance of being known and sharing personal stories.
• Challenges faced in relationships, particularly with a spouse.
• The importance of creating safe environments for men to share their experiences.
• Emotional suppression and its impact on personal well-being.
• The role of communication in fostering intimacy and connection in relationships.
• The necessity of vulnerability and honesty in personal and spiritual growth.
• Building supportive relationships with mentors and peers for spiritual development.
• Encouragement for those struggling with hidden aspects of their lives to seek help and support.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• Mere Christianity* by C.S. Lewis
• Find a Group

Related Podcasts:

• The Story of 3 Men
• Understanding 4 Key Roles in Your Story
• Mr Unemotional: Moving from Isolation to Connection

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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We discuss practical steps for couples to cultivate awareness, the role of play in healing, and strategies for managing triggers. Dr. Call offers hope and resources for couples to nourish their relationships.

To learn more about Dr. Call’s resources and to get the book, visit TheReconnectInstitute.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of the book "The Deep Rooted Marriage: Cultivating Intimacy, Healing, and Delight.*"
• Exploration of how past experiences and traumas influence current marital conflicts.
• Importance of cultivating awareness and curiosity in relationships.
• The role of intensive counseling formats in addressing deep-rooted issues.
• Strategies for couples to develop awareness during conflicts.
• The significance of play in fostering connection and healing in marriage.
• Addressing triggers and shame in relationships, particularly during recovery.
• Practical strategies for emotional regulation and self-care during challenging moments.
• The metaphor of soil amendments to illustrate the need for nurturing relationships.
• Resources and support for couples seeking to deepen their connection and navigate challenges.

More Resources:

• The Deep-Rooted Marriage* by Allender and Call
• Marriage Story Intensive
• Reconnect* by Dr. Steve Call

Related Podcasts:

• 6 Hours that will Transform Your Marriage
• Working Through Emotional Disconnection in Marriage
• Growing a Stronger Marriage Even When it's Difficult

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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We suggest that solitude can be a sanctuary for self-reflection and growth, encouraging you to create a “holy space” for healing. We ultimately want to offer you a compassionate perspective on failure, encouraging gentleness toward yourself and confidence in the transformative power of God's unwavering love. 

We start the episode by saying, “I hate failing.” We end it with, “But God likes me and so do I.” 

For daily thoughts from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The emotional impact of failure on individuals.
• Feelings of rejection, isolation, and shame associated with failure.
• The cycle of shame and loneliness stemming from failure.
• The importance of self-acceptance and kindness in overcoming failure.
• The role of community and support in addressing feelings of inadequacy.
• Generational patterns of failure and their effects on identity.
• The concept of solitude as a sanctuary for self-reflection and growth.
• The relationship between identity, self-worth, and external validation.
• The nature of God's love in relation to failure and self-acceptance.
• Strategies for reframing failure as a part of the human experience rather than a defining characteristic.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• Grace-Based Transformation* by Jonathan Daugherty
• 40 Days of Purity for Men online course

Related Podcasts:

• Understanding Failure in Recovery
• What's Your Failure and Rejection Management Plan
• How to Be at Peace in Aloneness

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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We share insights on personal growth, emphasizing the importance of understanding and appreciating each other's communication styles; we aren’t out to change a loner into a connector or vice versa. We give lots of personal anecdotes and practical advice, aiming to help you navigate these differences to foster deeper connections and build stronger, more fulfilling relationships.

For daily thoughts from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

To read the Thought on Loners and Connectors, go to DoctorMarriage.org/loners-and-connectors.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Distinction between "loners" and "connectors" in personal relationships.
• Characteristics of loners: independence, introspection, and internal processing.
• Characteristics of connectors: relational, expressive, and dialogue-oriented.
• Impact of communication styles on relationships, particularly in marriage.
• Importance of emotional connection and its role in relationship dynamics.
• Challenges faced by loners in engaging with emotional exchanges.
• The necessity of active listening in fostering trust and connection.
• Strategies for navigating differences between loners and connectors.
• The role of personal growth in improving relationship dynamics.
• Encouragement for couples to discuss and understand their connection styles for deeper intimacy.

More Resources:

• 40 Days to Oneness by Stephen Cervantes
• The 40 Day Relationship Builder* by Stephen Cervantes
• Building True Intimacy* by Matthew & Joanna Raabsmith

Related Podcasts:

• Dealing with Conflict Podcast Bundle
• Working Through Emotional Disconnection in Marriage
• About Your Emotional Connecting Skills

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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We delve into defining boundaries as supportive frameworks rather than punishing limitations, avoiding misuse of boundaries for control, and harmonizing them to foster safety and mutual respect. The Raabsmiths highlight the importance of individual responsibility and how boundaries can create a safe space for healing and rebuilding trust.

To download the Raabsmith’s free Honest Connection Guide, visit RenewingUs.com/puresexradio.

Click here for the Raabsmith's full bios

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of boundaries in marriage restoration after betrayal
• Definition and positive framing of boundaries in relationships
• Distinction between healthy boundaries and manipulative or controlling behaviors
• Role of individual responsibility in setting and maintaining boundaries
• Challenges faced by the betrayed spouse in establishing boundaries
• The necessity for the betraying spouse to take accountability and establish their own boundaries
• Navigating fear and emotional responses related to boundary setting
• Strategies for harmonizing boundaries to support both partners and the relationship
• Addressing boundary violations and the importance of introspection
• Establishing new habits and structures to support healthy boundaries in the relationship

More Resources:

• Building True Intimacy* by Matthew & Joanna Raabsmith
• Renewing Us Recovery
• Renewing Us Couples Retreat

Related Podcasts:

• Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal
• The Need for Boundaries After Betrayal
• Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Betrayal

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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Sarah opens up about her upbringing, the pressures she faced, and the lies she believed about her worth. She recounts the painful yet transformative process of rebuilding trust with her husband, JP, and how her faith in Christ played a crucial role in their healing. Sarah's story is a powerful testament to the importance of vulnerability, honesty, and the grace of God in overcoming life's toughest obstacles. 

To learn more about Sarah and get a copy of her book, visit SarahJeanMatzke.com.

Topics Covered in the Episode:

• Personal struggles with body image and eating disorders
• Impact of societal pressures and familial expectations on self-worth
• Challenges faced in marriage, including infidelity
• The process of rebuilding trust after betrayal
• Importance of open communication and transparency in relationships
• Role of faith and spirituality in healing and restoration
• Seeking professional help and therapy for personal issues
• The significance of accountability and honesty in relationships
• The journey of self-discovery and confronting personal lies
• Sharing personal stories as a means of hope and encouragement for others

More Resources:

• Desert Vineyards: A Story of Bulimia, Adultery, and Infertility Redeemed by Truth* by Sarah Matzke
• The Body Revelation* by Keeton and Connolly

Related Podcasts:

• Understanding Female Sexuality and Struggles
• Confession and Disclosure for Couples
• Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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We discuss how recovery goes beyond just stopping harmful behaviors or behavioral sobriety and involves understanding and healing deeper emotional wounds. Carl highlights the stigma around mental health and the need for a holistic approach to recovery. He also provides resources for those seeking support. This episode aims to offer hope and guidance to anyone navigating similar challenges or interested in the recovery process.

To learn more about Carl and the Live Free Ministries resources, visit LiveFreeCommunity.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Recovery from pornography and sexual addiction
• Importance of community in the recovery process
• Personal journey and background of the speaker
• Holistic approach to mental and emotional health in recovery
• Addressing underlying emotional and mental health issues
• The stigma surrounding mental health and seeking help
• The interconnectedness of various aspects of life in recovery
• Coping mechanisms and their relation to addiction
• Encouragement for ongoing growth and development in recovery
• Resources and support available for individuals seeking recovery

More Resources:

• XXXChurch.com
• Gateway to Freedom 3-day Intensive for Men
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups

Related Podcasts:

• The Power of Community
• When Shame Gets Real
• Real Stories of Recovery and Hope

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We discuss the broader implications of infidelity on family relationships and the unique challenges faced by children at all stages of growing up. Melissa offers valuable insights and resources for those navigating this difficult journey.

To learn more about Melissa and her research, visit MelissaMacomber.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Emotional and psychological impact of parental infidelity on adult children
• Personal experiences of discovering a parent's affair
• Family dynamics and their evolution post-infidelity
• Lack of resources and support for adult children dealing with parental betrayal
• Patterns of infidelity in adult relationships stemming from childhood experiences
• The importance of addressing feelings of betrayal and trust issues
• The role of boundaries in the healing process for adult children
• Distinction between forgiveness and rebuilding trust
• Challenges faced by adult children in navigating their parents' conflicts
• The significance of sharing personal stories and seeking therapy for healing

More Resources:

• Help for Adult Children (of any age)
• Help for Therapists
• Ten Research-Based Facts about Parent-Infidelity

Related Podcasts:

• Why Do We Cheat?
• Talking to Your Kids About Sex (Podcast Bundle)
• Rebuilding Your Marriage After Betrayal (Podcast Bundle)

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We explore various conditions that explain certain kinds pain during sex and how to address them. She also highlights the emotional toll painful sex can take, noting that "many women suffer in silence, feeling isolated and ashamed, which only exacerbates the problem."

Throughout our discussion, Dr. Degler underscores the significance of still pursuing intimacy in relationships despite these challenges. She explains, "Intimacy is not just about physical connection; it's about emotional closeness and understanding.” She offers hope and practical advice, encouraging couples to seek professional help and create safe spaces for expressing emotions. 

To learn more about Dr. Degler and her resources, visit JenniferDegler.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of painful sex, particularly from women's perspectives.
• Prevalence of sexual pain disorders among women.
• Emotional and psychological implications of sexual pain.
• Stigma and shame associated with painful sex.
• The impact of societal expectations on women's sexual experiences.
• Importance of open communication in addressing sexual health issues.
• Exploration of various conditions causing sexual pain, such as vaginismus.
• The role of sexual intimacy in fostering emotional bonds within relationships.
• The significance of grieving lost intimacy and processing emotions together.
• Encouragement for seeking professional help and resources for sexual health.

More Resources:

• Sex Life Resources from Dr. Degler
• What to Do When Sex is Painful
• Worry and Anxiety Management Techniques

Related Podcasts:

• How to Make Sex Pleasurable and Fun Again
• God, Sex, and Your Marriage
• What are Your Sexpectations?

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We discuss the importance of forgiveness, especially Wendy's unique relationship with Reese's ex-wife. Wendy hopes her story offers hope and understanding to others in similar situations, emphasizing that healing and transformation are always possible.

To get the book and learn about coaching services, visit TheSilentAddiction.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Wendy Crane's personal journey and experiences with infidelity
• The emotional process of writing her book, "The Scandal of Virginia Grey"
• Themes of healing and redemption in relationships
• The significance of forgiveness, particularly in blended families
• The allegorical nature of Wendy's book and its connection to her life
• The impact of revisiting painful memories during the writing process
• The concept of confession as a means of healing
• Target audiences for the book, including those in similar situations and readers interested in redemption stories
• The importance of self-forgiveness and compassion towards others
• Messages of hope and transformation in the face of adversity

More Resources:

• The Scandal of Virginia Grey book
• Basics Webinar for Wives
• Wives Care Groups for Betrayal Trauma Healing

Related Podcasts:

• Life and Hope After Divorce: Reese and Sharon's Story
• Dealing with Divorce, Betrayal Trauma, and Hope
• New Course: 40 Days of Healing for Wives

----------

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Norma provides practical strategies for parents to foster a safe environment for open dialogue, ensuring meaningful conversations about online safety and appropriate behavior – and not just over spring break. We discuss the importance of ongoing communication, setting clear expectations, and addressing idleness. We emphasize the value of empathy, vulnerability, and guiding children through their spiritual journeys, both in everyday life as well as times, like spring break, when schedules and routines are disrupted. 

For everything we discussed in today’s episode, visit Bebroken.org/springbreaksuccess.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Preparing parents for spring break and its challenges.
• Managing children's online behavior during unstructured time.
• Importance of ongoing communication about sexuality between parents and children.
• Strategies for setting clear expectations and boundaries.
• Addressing idleness and its impact on children's behavior.
• Encouraging productive activities and family engagement during breaks.
• Importance of pre-spring break, during spring break, and post-spring break conversations.
• Discussing online safety and appropriate behavior with children.
• Sharing personal experiences to foster connection and trust.
• Encouraging a biblical worldview and open dialogue about curiosity and sexuality.

More Resources:

• Critical Conversation Free Webinar
• 7 Tips to Help You Address Sexual Issues with Your Kids
• A Family Game Plan for Discussing Porn (online course)

Related Podcasts:

• Teaching Healthy Tech Habits to Your Kids (Podcast Bundle)
• Talking to Your Kids About Sex (Podcast Bundle)
• A Family Game Plan for Responding to Porn

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Stephen emphasizes the value of men engaging with their wives through simple acts like sharing daily thoughts and curiosity, which can foster meaningful dialogue. We also touch on the challenges of communication, the impact of self-absorption, and the importance of processing disappointment with God first. Ultimately, the episode offers practical tools for men to nurture deeper connections with their wives.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of self-awareness in relationships, especially for husbands.
• Recognizing patterns in interactions with partners.
• The significance of understanding one's own thoughts and feelings.
• Observing and responding to the emotional states of partners.
• Challenges of communication between men and women.
• The impact of sharing ideas and fostering dialogue in relationships.
• The role of self-absorption and its effects on communication.
• The necessity of processing disappointments with God before addressing them with a partner.
• The influence of tone and demeanor on partner perceptions during discussions.
• Strategies for creating a supportive and understanding relationship dynamic.

More Resources:

• Recognizing Patterns
• 40 Days of Training for Your Soul (free download)
• 40 Days to Oneness (marriage devotional)

Related Podcasts:

• Emotional Growth for Men Podcast Bundle
• Dealing with Conflict in Marriage Podcast Bundle
• Understanding Emotionally Detached Men

----------

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She shares the struggles, shame, and guilt she faced, and the redemptive work God has done in their lives over time, even though they are very much in the “messy middle” of the journey. Melinda emphasizes the importance of love, listening, and understanding, offering valuable insights for parents in similar situations. Her story is a testament to the power of compassion and faith in overcoming challenges.

To learn more about Melinda and her resources, visit MelindaPatrick.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Melinda Patrick's journey as a mother dealing with her daughter's same-sex attraction revelation.
• Initial reactions of parents when faced with their child's professed LGBTQ identity.
• The impact of a "fix it" mentality on parent-child relationships.
• Feelings of shame, guilt, and isolation experienced by parents.
• The importance of love, listening, and understanding in difficult family situations.
• The role of faith and spiritual growth in navigating personal struggles.
• The significance of authentic faith and modeling forgiveness in relationships.
• Common pitfalls for parents, such as the urge to control or manipulate situations.
• The power of prayer and seeking God's guidance in parenting.
• Resources for parents, including Melinda's book and podcast focused on supporting LGBTQ-identifying children.

More Resources:

• The Daring Rescue* book
• The Bridge Between Us podcast with Melinda Patrick
• HisWonderfulWorks.com

Related Podcasts:

• Can the Church Be a Safe Place for Healing and Transformation?
• How to Support Without Endorsing
• Loving Your LGBTQ-Identified Child with Grace and Truth

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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We discuss the importance of addressing these issues of sexual brokenness openly within the church and fostering supportive communities. A big part of the conversation is helping men understand what the true bullseye is for recovery from unwanted sexual behaviors. Noah emphasizes that true healing comes from understanding one's identity in Christ, not just behavior modification. The good news is that there is hope for truly overcoming any unwanted sexual behaviors through the power of God’s grace and vulnerable community.

To learn more about Noah and his resources, visit BeyondtheBattle.net.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Men's sexual integrity journeys
• Personal experiences with pornography addiction
• Challenges faced growing up in a Christian environment
• The role of vulnerability and community in recovery
• The impact of marriage on sexual desires and relationships
• Understanding identity in Christ as a foundation for healing
• The importance of addressing sexual integrity within the church
• Overcoming shame and fear of vulnerability in discussions
• The significance of community support in the recovery process
• Practical steps for engaging in deeper transformation and discipleship

More Resources:

• Beyond the Battle Online Groups
• Needed Navigation Teen Guide
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Porn Addiction Recovery for Men Podcast Bundle
• Recovery Discovery 002: Identity
• How Can Recovery Lead to a New Growth Mission?

----------

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We explore the pain of feeling isolated from a spouse and the importance of personal growth, faith, and community support. 

Stephen shares wisdom on enduring suffering, finding joy beyond one’s spouse, and the necessity of a supportive network. We emphasize that personal transformation often happens through discomfort and that God's presence provides comfort and guidance. This episode is a hopeful reminder that growth and resilience can lead to deeper connections and fulfillment, even in challenging times.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Emotional disconnection in marriage
• Personal growth through discomfort and suffering
• The role of faith in navigating relationship challenges
• Importance of community support and accountability
• Strategies for coping with loneliness and isolation
• Transforming perspectives on love and relationships
• Finding contentment and peace in solitude
• Engaging in practices that foster connection with God
• The significance of ongoing dialogue with God
• Encouragement to take actionable steps toward personal transformation

More Resources:

• God is Growing You
• Is Grace Really Enough?
• Dealing with Conflict - Marriage Podcast Bundle

Related Podcasts:

• What Can Stunt Your Emotional Growth Mission?
• Living More than a Love Story
• Grieving to Grow a Great Marriage

----------

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She emphasizes the importance of healing for both mothers and their children, and the need for safety, support, and faith during these challenging times. Casey’s candid reflections on anger, authenticity, and revisiting her faith offer valuable insights and encouragement. She invites listeners to engage in support, reminding us that healing is possible through Christ and connection.

To learn more about Casey and her coaching resources, visit ComeAwakeCoach.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Mothering through betrayal trauma
• Personal experiences of a mother of nine dealing with betrayal
• Impact of betrayal on family dynamics
• Importance of healing for mothers and children
• Emotional complexities of motherhood in the context of betrayal
• Need for safety and healthy boundaries
• Communication strategies with children during difficult times
• Navigating anger and authenticity in motherhood
• Revisiting faith and theological beliefs during struggles
• Offering hope and support for mothers facing betrayal trauma

More Resources:

• Wives Care Online Groups
• 40 Days of Healing for Wives Online Course
• Come Awake Support Groups

Related Podcasts:

• Betrayal Trauma Healing Podcast Bundle
• Identifying and Meeting Needs in a Betrayed Wife
• Emotional Transformation Therapy for Betrayed Wives

----------

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We celebrate you, the community we’ve built together, and encourage you to reflect on your own experiences and the transformative power of God's grace. This episode is both a celebration of a huge milestone and an invitation for you to share your stories and engage deeply with the mission of transformation.

Please share your podcast stories with me directly at jonathan@bebroken.org. 

To get daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Celebration of the 1000th episode milestone of the podcast.
• Reflection on the podcast's history and evolution since its inception in 2005.
• Importance of grace and kindness in personal and professional lives.
• Encouragement for listeners to share their own stories and experiences.
• Discussion on the transformative power of God's grace.
• Emphasis on community building and support among listeners.
• Exploration of personal messages and purpose in life.
• The significance of peace, rest, and joy in emotional and spiritual well-being.
• Recognition of the role of pain in discovering purpose and growth.
• Commitment to providing practical information and inspiring action for listeners.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• Grace-Based Recovery 8-Week Online Study Groups
• FREE Men's Integrity Webinar

Related Podcasts:

• How Can Recovery Lead to a New Growth Mission?
• Back to the Basics of Sexual Integrity
• Three Purposes in Life

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View this episode on YouTube

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How important is trust to emotional health and building strong, mature relationships? It is vital! Yet, many men we have served in our ministry struggle terribly with trust. 

In today’s episode, Stephen and I are going to dig into this important topic of trust through the lens of one man’s story that begins with him not being able to trust his parents with his thoughts and feelings and ends with him finally living a “love plus trust” story. 

We will share the distinction between love and trust and how love plus trust takes us even deeper than love alone. We need to learn how to understand trust in its multilayered dimensions if we want to enjoy strong, healthy relationships.

For resources from Stephen to help you grow and mature emotionally, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

More Resources:

• 40 Days to Oneness
• Growth Map: The Pathway to Peace, Rest, and Joy*
• Untangling Emotions by Groves & Smith*

Related Podcasts:

• Men Helping Men Grow and Mature
• Healing Steps to Rebuild Trust
• Why Men Struggle to Love

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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View this episode on YouTube

-----

HELP REACH THE YEAR-END GOAL TO IMPACT MORE LIVES!

We have a goal of $118,000 to reach even more individuals and families in 2025 through this podcast and all our other ministries.

To partner with us, give at Bebroken.org/donate or call 210-822-8201.

-----

In this episode, we're hanging out with the dynamic duo, Linda Stewart and Linda Noble, who share their journey and collaborative work in the world of sexual education and theology of the body. 

They tell about their work with the Identity Project, aiming to help parents and families chat about sexuality and relationships in a faith-filled, positive way. The Lindas talk about their own lightbulb moments at the Theology of the Body Institute and how they're now passionate about giving parents the tools to paint a beautiful picture of God's design for their kids. 

They're all about tackling the big questions and easing those parent jitters with resources like their books and workbooks. It's all about building trust, having heart-to-hearts, and guiding the little ones through life's big topics. 

Learn more about the Lindas and their work at IdentityProject.tv and TheConversationWorkshop.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Collaboration of Linda Stewart and Linda Noble in sexual education and theology of the body
• The Linda's Involvement in the Identity Project
• Approach to educating parents and families about sexuality and relationships
• Initial reluctance to discuss sexuality and the journey to embracing the theology of the body
• Theology of the body as a comprehensive view of sexuality and Christian sexual ethic
• Importance of understanding God's design for sex in addressing sexual brokenness
• The role of parents in teaching children about God's love and their design
• Addressing the fears and anxieties of parents in discussing sexuality with children
• Providing support and resources for parents to navigate sexuality and relationships with their children

More Resources:

• Before the Sex Talk* by The Lindas
• Honest Talk* by John Fort
• Our Bodies Tell God's Story* by Christopher West

Related Podcasts:

• God's Design for Emotional Growth and Sexuality
• Helping Your Kids Apply the Gospel to Sex and Sexuality
• Keeping Kids Safe in a Digital World

*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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He recounts how early exposure to pornography led to a cycle of hiddenness and shame, and how opening up to his family and seeking therapy marked the beginning of his recovery. Stephen's story is a powerful reminder of the grace of God and the importance of authentic connections and support in overcoming deep personal struggles.

To learn more about Stephen and his coaching services, visit StephenThomasConsulting.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal journey of overcoming struggles with pornography and same-sex attraction.
• Impact of upbringing in a Christian household on sexual identity and shame.
• The significance of vulnerability and honesty in relationships.
• The role of community and support in the healing process.
• The internal conflict between desires and societal expectations.
• The importance of confession and accountability in recovery.
• Addressing underlying emotional issues related to addiction.
• Strategies for maintaining sobriety and fostering meaningful connections.
• Advice for men at different stages of their recovery journey.
• Resources available for further support and coaching in overcoming sexual brokenness.

More Resources:

• Get Free, Stay Free Masterclass
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• Grace-Based Recovery 8-Week Online Study Groups

Related Podcasts:

• The Sex Talk You Never Got
• Am I Gay? (with Garry Ingraham)
• How Group Work Will Transform Your Recovery Journey

----------

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(We are currently at nearly 40% of the goal!)

This ministry continues to reach men and women worldwide through the generous and faithful partnerships of listeners like you. Would you prayerfully consider partnering with us to meet our year-end financial need?

To make your year-end gift or become a monthly partner, visit Bebroken.org/donate. Thank you!

----------

In today’s episode, my guests are Mark and Jill Savage, a couple that understands struggle, betrayal, and restoration. They talk about their incredible journey, betrayal, and the journey to rebuild trust. Mark opens up about his midlife crisis and infidelity after 28 years of marriage, while Jill shares the deep pain and the process of healing. 

They emphasize the importance of personal growth, accountability, and transparent communication. Mark's transformation began with a personal "resurrection" moment one Easter Sunday, leading to consistent efforts to regain Jill's trust. Their story is a testament to the power of God’s faithfulness and commitment in overcoming marital challenges, offering hope and practical insights for couples facing similar struggles.

To learn more about Mark and Jill and their resources, visit JillSavage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The journey of Mark and Jill Savage through marriage challenges, including infidelity.
• The impact of betrayal on family dynamics and emotional well-being.
• The process of rebuilding trust after infidelity and the time it requires.
• The importance of transparency and accountability in restoring trust.
• Individual growth as a crucial element in healing and relationship improvement.
• The role of effective communication and vulnerability in strengthening relationships.
• The nature of trust as a gradual process that cannot be forced.
• The significance of personal responsibility and self-improvement in overcoming marital issues.
• Offering hope and resources for couples facing similar challenges.
• The transformative power of faith and commitment in rebuilding a marriage.

More Resources:

• RebuildingTrust.us
• No More Perfect Marriages* by Mark & Jill Savage
• Marriage 2.0 Intensive

Related Podcasts:

• Rebuilding Your Marriage After Betrayal Podcast Playlist
• A Journey of Redemption and Healing
• How Can Therapeutic Disclosure Help Heal Marriages Affected by Sexual Betrayal?

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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We discuss the common lack of support from the church and the critical need for understanding and compassion. Kim offers practical tools for healing across physical, emotional, spiritual, and relational aspects. This episode is a beacon of hope, reminding women that healing from betrayal and a stronger sense of self and community are within reach.

To learn more about Kim and her resources, visit NotaCasseroleWidow.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Betrayal trauma healing, particularly for women in difficult marriages.
• Personal experiences and professional background of the guest in psychology and counseling.
• The impact of betrayal trauma on women's emotional and spiritual well-being.
• The three main stages of healing from betrayal trauma: 1) safety and stabilization, 2) grief and mourning, and 3) reconnecting with the outside world.
• Challenges faced by women during divorce, including identity loss and lack of community support.
• The role of the church in supporting women experiencing betrayal trauma.
• The importance of self-care and emotional support during the healing process.
• Practical tools for physical, emotional, spiritual, and relational healing.
• The significance of community and shared experiences among women dealing with betrayal trauma.
• Messages of hope and empowerment for women navigating their healing journeys.

More Resources:

• Not a Casserole Widow* by Kim Hansen Petroni
• CoachingHope4U.com
• Online Care Groups for Wives

Related Podcasts:

• Is There Hope After Divorce Due to Sexual Betrayal?
• Life and Hope After Divorce: Reese and Sharon's Story
• New Course: 40 Days of Healing for Wives

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

Please rate and review our podcast: Apple Podcasts

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This ministry continues to reach men and women worldwide through the generous and faithful partnerships of listeners like you. Would you prayerfully consider partnering with us to meet our year-end financial need?

To make your year-end gift or become a monthly partner, visit Bebroken.org/donate. Thank you!

----------

In this episode, Dr. Stephen Cervantes and I dive into the theme of temptation, especially regarding male sexuality and the internal conflicts it sparks. Through a role-playing exercise, we illustrate the dialogue between the mind, body, and spirit during moments of temptation. 

We highlight the struggle between seeking pleasure and maintaining spiritual discipline. Stephen emphasizes the importance of standing firm and seeking peace, while I underscore the role of the Holy Spirit and community support in overcoming temptation. This episode offers valuable insights and practical tools for managing desires and fostering a healthier relationship with yourself.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of temptation, particularly in the context of male sexuality.
• Internal conflict between the mind, body, and spirit during moments of temptation.
• Role-playing exercise to illustrate the dialogue among different parts of the self.
• The cyclical nature of temptation and the struggle for self-control.
• The concept of the "wounded boy" representing emotional pain and longing for comfort.
• The importance of spiritual discipline and self-control in managing desires.
• The role of the Holy Spirit in guiding individuals through temptation.
• The significance of community and connection in overcoming isolation during struggles.
• Encouragement to engage in self-reflection and recognize inner conflicts.
• A call to action for individuals to pursue a healthier relationship with their desires and spiritual journey.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• Sexual Integrity Webinar for Men
• Dealing with Temptation Podcast Bundle

Related Podcasts:

• Going Deeper: How Your Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction
• What to Do in the Moment of Temptation
• Understanding Body, Soul, and Spirit

----------

Please rate and review our podcast: Apple Podcasts

Subscribe to our YouTube channel.

This ministry continues to reach men and women worldwide through the generous and faithful partnerships of listeners like you. Would you prayerfully consider partnering with us to meet our year-end financial need?

To make your year-end gift or become a monthly partner, visit Bebroken.org/donate. Thank you!

----------

In this episode, our guest is Ben Locke, author of "In Our Suffering Lord Be Near: Prayers of Hope for the Hurting." Ben shares his amazing journey from being a dedicated soccer player to facing severe injuries, abuse, and emotional trauma. These experiences led him to a deep exploration of suffering, mental health, and faith.

We discuss the importance of processing emotions, the transformative power of prayer, and the role of therapy in healing. Ben’s story is a testament to finding hope and connection through shared human experiences and Christian faith. Join us for an inspiring conversation on resilience and recovery.

Ben’s book can be found on Amazon or wherever books are sold. If you want to receive Ben’s weekly prayer devotional, visit EvensongJournal.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal journey through suffering, injury, and trauma
• Experiences as a soccer player and the impact of injuries
• Challenges related to mental health and emotional struggles
• The role of prayer in coping with suffering
• Importance of processing emotions and seeking therapy
• Connection between suffering and shared human experiences
• Role of faith and relationship with God through struggles
• The transformative power of prayer and honest communication with God
• The significance of community and support in dealing with suffering
• Hope and healing as outcomes of confronting and sharing struggles

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive for men
• Find a Group
• A Sacred Sorrow* by Michael Card

Related Podcasts:

• Let's Pray
• Recovery Discovery 019: Prayer
• The Immanuel Approach in Recovery

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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Dr. Seiler discusses her book, "Transformation: A Former Transgender's Response to LGBTQ," highlighting her struggles, the power of Christ, and the importance of compassion and truth when addressing such complex and personal struggles. Our conversation emphasizes a clear gospel approach to sexual brokenness, offering hope and understanding for those navigating similar challenges. There is good news in the gospel – Jesus really does transform us!

For more information about Linda and her ministry, visit RestoryMinistries.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Dr. Linda Siler's personal journey with gender identity and sexuality.
• The impact of her conversion to Christianity on her identity and struggles.
• Discussion of her book "Transformation: A Former Transgender's Response to LGBTQ."
• The concept of being "born again" and its implications for identity in Christ.
• Misconceptions surrounding LGBTQ identities and the potential for change.
• The five streams of church responses to LGBTQ issues: condemnation, affirmation, accommodation, mortification, and transformation.
• The importance of compassion and understanding in addressing sexual brokenness.
• The role of the gospel in transforming lives and identities.
• Encouragement for individuals to engage with and support those struggling with their sexuality.
• Resources for further exploration of LGBTQ issues within a faith context.

More Resources:

• TRANS-formation: A Former Transgender Responds to LGBTQ* by Dr. Linda Seiler
• LindaSeiler.com
• Quick Guides

Related Podcasts:

• Exposing the Gender Lie (with Brandon Showalter)
• Navigating Identity & Sexuality - A Compassionate Approach for Parents
• Am I Gay? (with Garry Ingraham)

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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I admire Stephen’s work on DoctorMarriage.org and how he offers practical tools and tips for men wanting to live a full life of integrity. In our conversation, we explore themes of belonging, identity, and the emotional struggles many face. We highlight the coexistence of sadness and hope, encouraging listeners to embrace self-discovery and seek support for healing and transformation. 

To get daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal responsibility and its complexities
• Impact of childhood experiences on adult behavior
• Distinction between personal choices and external influences
• Insights from the "Gateway to Freedom" workshop
• Emotional struggles related to belonging and identity
• The pain of rejection and its lasting effects
• The relationship between sadness and hope
• Coping mechanisms developed in childhood and their consequences
• The journey of self-discovery and healing
• Importance of seeking support and community for personal growth

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive for men
• Sad, but Hopeful post on DoctorMarriage.org
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Groups

Related Podcasts:

• Why Men Need to Practice Sadness
• Whole Man Recovery Pt 3: Emotional
• Navigating Grief, Fear, and Transformation

----------

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We delve into her transformative encounters with God, the challenges of navigating faith within the LGBTQ+ community, and the importance of self-acceptance in light of the gospel. Elizabeth's story highlights the power of experiencing God's love and the ongoing journey of understanding one's true identity. Her insights offer hope and guidance for anyone grappling with similar issues. Join us for this earnest and enlightening conversation!

For more information about Elizabeth and her movement, visit ChangedMovement.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of the intersection between faith and sexuality.
• Personal journey of an openly lesbian woman in a religious context.
• Experiences in seminary and the LGBTQ+ community.
• The impact of transformative encounters with God.
• Reevaluation of beliefs regarding identity and self-acceptance.
• The role of God's love in shaping personal identity.
• Challenges faced by individuals with life-dominating issues related to sexuality.
• Importance of relational understanding of God versus a philosophical approach.
• Strategies for creating safe environments for discussions about identity.
• Encouragement for individuals to seek a deeper communion with God.

More Resources:

• Changed Book: #OnceGayStories
• Navigating LGBTQ video course
• Changed Stories

Related Podcasts:

• From Broken Home to Broken Sexuality to Wholeness in Christ
• Am I Gay? (with Garry Ingraham)
• What is Sexual Discipleship?

----------

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In our conversation, Phil opens up about his long-term struggle with pornography and the devastating impact it had on their relationship. Priscilla shares her raw emotions of betrayal and anger, and how she found the strength to forgive. Together, they highlight the importance of honesty, vulnerability, and seeking help. Their story is a powerful reminder that even in the darkest times, transformation and healing are possible through faith and open communication.

To learn more about Phil and Priscilla and their ministry, visit SavageMarriageMinistries.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal struggles with pornography and its impact on marriage
• The journey of confession and the importance of transparency
• Emotional wounds and their influence on behavior
• The role of accountability and seeking help in recovery
• The process of healing from betrayal and anger
• The significance of communication in rebuilding trust
• The impact of struggles on family dynamics and relationships
• The transformative power of vulnerability and honesty
• The development of a new ministry to support others facing similar challenges
• Encouragement for others to pursue healing and restoration in their relationships

More Resources:

• Savage Marriage* by Phil and Priscilla Fretwell
• Savage Marriage Podcast
• Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive for men
• Wives Care Online Groups

Related Podcasts:

• The Journey to Stay (with Steve & Lisa Goldberg)
• Out of the Dust: One Couple's Story of Radical Redemption
• 4 Skills to Transform Your Marriage

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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We explore the impact of shame and purity culture, and the distinction between normal arousal and lust. Sam highlights the need for competent counseling and open dialogue to foster a healthier understanding of men's sexual formation. This episode is a heartfelt call to reclaim the beauty and complexity of human sexuality as God designed it.

To learn more about Sam and the book, visit SamJolman.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of open conversations about sexuality
• Personal experiences and backstory of the speaker as a therapist and father
• The role of competent counseling in addressing sexual issues
• Impact of shame and purity culture on men's understanding of sexuality
• Distinction between normal arousal and lust
• Concept of the "wow response" to beauty and attraction
• Nature of sexuality as a means for emotional and relational connection
• Influence of generational patterns of shame on sexual education
• Guidance for parents on discussing sexuality with children
• Encouragement for ongoing dialogue about sexuality rather than a single conversation

More Resources:

• The Sex Talk You Never Got* by Sam Jolman
• Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive for men
• Our Bodies Tell God's Story* by Christopher West

Related Podcasts:

• Understanding God's Design for Sex in Today's Confused Culture
• God's Design for Emotional Growth and Sexuality
• What is Sexual Discipleship?

*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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We discuss the unique emotional challenges women face after betrayal and the critical role of support and understanding from both partners and their community. Lyschel also highlights the spiritual aspect of healing, stressing how Christ provides hope and safety during suffering and grief. It’s a heartfelt conversation aimed at offering solace and guidance to those traveling this difficult path. 

To learn more about Lyschel and her resources for wives, visit HopeRedefined.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Healing journey of women experiencing betrayal trauma, particularly in marriages.
• Importance of community support and connection during the healing process.
• Emotional challenges faced by women after discovering betrayal.
• Need for safety and stabilization as foundational aspects of healing.
• Communication between partners to rebuild trust and understanding.
• Unique experiences of betrayal and the necessity for empathy from partners.
• Role of the betraying partner in supporting the healing process.
• Impact of trauma on the grieving process and emotional responses.
• Self-care practices and accountability for betrayed partners.
• Spiritual aspect of healing and finding hope through faith.

More Resources:

• Hope for Wives Podcast
• 40 Days of Healing for Wives online course
• Hope Redefined Online Community

Related Podcasts:

• Sexual Betrayal and Spiritual Battle
• The Need for Safety in Betrayal Trauma Healing
• Forgiveness and Grief in Betrayal Trauma Healing

----------

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Dr. Degler shares her insights on the importance of pleasure within God's design for sex and offers practical steps for re-engaging with intimacy after betrayal. We discuss the necessity of communication, mindfulness, and sensory exploration to rebuild trust and enjoyment in sexual relationships. Jennifer’s tips and insightful anecdotes provide a refreshing perspective on rekindling passion and connection in marriage.

To learn more about Dr. Degler and her resources, visit JenniferDegler.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of pleasure in sexual relationships within a Christian context.
• Challenges couples face in reconnecting after betrayal or brokenness.
• Practical steps for re-engaging with intimacy and pleasure.
• Role of communication in rebuilding trust and intimacy.
• Mindfulness techniques to enhance sensory experiences during intimacy.
• Non-sexual physical affection as a foundation for intimacy.
• Engaging the five senses to deepen connection and pleasure.
• Strategies for managing intrusive thoughts during intimate moments.
• Incorporating spirituality and prayer into the healing process.
• Encouragement for couples to persevere in their journey toward intimacy and fulfillment.

More Resources:

• CWIVES
• Free resources for building healthy marriages
• Find a Counselor

Related Podcasts:

• What Men Need to Know About Female Sexuality
• Understanding Your Flipped Out Brain
• The Journey to Stay

----------

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We dive into the course's development, its structure, and the importance of pacing and journaling. Gigi and Andrea share heartfelt insights on fostering healing, the power of community support, and how faith plays a crucial role in the healing journey for wives.

To learn more and enroll in the course, visit PureLifeAcademy.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Development of the "40 Days of Healing for Wives" course
• Importance of healing for wives dealing with betrayal, especially sexual betrayal
• Structure and key elements of the course, including pacing and journaling
• Role of community support in the healing process
• Emotional regulation and handling triggers during healing
• Incorporation of faith in the healing journey
• Personal growth and transformation through pain
• Goals and aspirations for participants in the course
• Encouragement and hope for women navigating betrayal
• Resources and support available for participants beyond the course

More Resources:

• Free Basics Webinar for Wives
• Wives Care Groups
• Personal Consultation for Wives

Related Podcasts:

• Self-Care and Rest for Wives Healing from Betrayal Trauma
• The Need for Boundaries After Betrayal
• Liminal Space: Helping Wives Transition from Betrayal to Hope

----------

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Stephen Cervantes and I discuss the importance of emotional growth alongside behavioral recovery. We share insights on how men can better understand and articulate their emotions, emphasizing the need for openness and support from partners and friends. The episode highlights the journey toward emotional maturity, encouraging men to embrace change for deeper, more fulfilling relationships.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Emotional health and its significance in addiction recovery for men.
• The concept of "Mr. Unemotional" and its implications for men's emotional development.
• The disconnect between behavioral recovery and emotional growth.
• The impact of childhood emotional training on adult emotional expression.
• The importance of recognizing and acknowledging one's emotional state.
• Tools and strategies for improving emotional awareness, such as the "feelings wheel."
• The role of openness and willingness to learn in emotional growth.
• Challenges in navigating emotional conversations and the tendency to shut down.
• The need for comfort and connection in relationships, particularly during emotional expressions.
• The journey toward emotional maturity and the potential for personal and relational transformation.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive
• 40 Days of Training for Your Soul
• Emotional Training for Men Webinar Series

Related Podcasts:

• Men's Emotional Self-Awareness Test
• Breaking Down Barriers: The Art of Active Listening
• A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional Growth

----------

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We discuss the unique challenges women face with pornography, the importance of understanding God's unconditional love, and the journey toward sexual integrity – which emphasizes the power of truth, engaging community, and sharing one's story to overcome shame and find lifelong healing.

For more info about Joy, the book, and the ministry, visit AuthenticIntimacy.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of the book "Her Freedom Journey: A Guide Out of Porn and Shame to Authentic Intimacy."
• Exploration of the challenges women face regarding pornography.
• The role of the Authentic Intimacy ministry in addressing issues of sexuality and intimacy.
• Personal stories of healing from shame, addiction, and abuse.
• The importance of understanding God's love and sexual integrity.
• The concept of sexual integrity and its integration with spiritual identity.
• The journey of healing as a continuous process rather than a destination.
• The impact of shame and identity on women's struggles with pornography.
• Practical tools for combating lies and embracing truth through scripture.
• Encouragement to share personal stories as a means of healing and breaking free from shame.

More Resources:

• Her Freedom Journey* by Dr. Joy Skarka and Dr. Juli Slattery
• Her Freedom Journey online book study
• SheRecovery.com

Related Podcasts:

• Freedom and Healing from Shame, Addiction, and Abuse
• New Research on Why Women View Porn
• God's Grace for Women Struggling with Porn and Sexual Shame

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Together, we explore the power of faith, personal stories, and cultural context in overcoming addiction and fostering recovery. I trust this conversation will inspire you in your own journey of pursuing greater integrity.

To learn more about Prodigals International, please visit ProdigalsInternational.org.

Topics Covered in Episode:

• Background and mission of Prodigals International
• Programs aimed at helping men with sexual addiction and intimacy disorders
• Personal stories of recovery from addiction
• Cultural influences on addiction and recovery experiences
• The role of community and accountability in overcoming addiction
• The importance of mentorship in the recovery process
• Challenges faced during the journey of recovery
• The impact of faith in the healing process
• Development of resources for Spanish-speaking individuals in recovery
• The significance of sharing personal stories to inspire hope in others

More Resources:

• Passport to Shame* by Sam Louie
• Prodigals in Espanol (Spanish language group for men)
• Online Homecoming Group

Related Podcasts:

• About Recovery and Asian Culture Shame
• Overcoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity
• Helping Men Overcome Porn and Get Emotionally Fit

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Mike shares his personal journey of overcoming pornography addiction and stresses the importance of open discussions in the church. We explore God's design for sex, emphasizing that understanding and obeying biblical truths can lead to healing and transformation. Mike encourages listeners to seek grace, find trustworthy confidants, and take steps toward wholeness in Christ.

To learn more about Mike, his book, and other gospel resources, visit TimeofGrace.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Discussion of taboo topics within the Christian community
• Personal experiences with anxiety, depression, and addiction
• The importance of open conversations about sexuality
• Overcoming struggles with pornography and the role of confession
• Understanding God's design for sex and its significance
• The necessity of obedience to biblical truths for transformation
• The impact of societal views on sexual intimacy within marriage
• The metaphor of sex as a fire, emphasizing boundaries and self-control
• The role of grace in addressing sexual sin and personal struggles
• Encouragement to seek support and build connections within the community

More Resources:

• Taboo: Topics Christians Should Be Talking About But Don't*
• Help for Men
• Help for Families

Related Podcasts:

• Exploring the Heart of Sexuality with Dr. Carol Tanksley
• Masturbation, Emotional Health, and Abundant Living
• God's Design for Emotional Growth and Sexuality

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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We discuss the five phases of tech training: 

1. Modeling
2. Delaying
3. Protecting
4. Monitoring
5. Releasing

Sarah provides practical tips and insights, aiming to empower parents to create a safe and balanced digital environment for their kids. It's a thoughtful conversation filled with valuable advice for modern parenting.

To learn more about Sarah and the resources she offers, visit ParentsWhoFight.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Challenges parents face regarding technology's impact on children
• Importance of modeling healthy technology habits
• Delaying access to devices and social media for children
• Educating parents about online safety and potential dangers
• The role of intentionality in family engagement with technology
• Framework for tech training for parents: modeling, delaying, protecting, monitoring, and releasing
• Strategies for creating a safe digital environment at home
• The significance of open communication and trust between parents and children
• Balancing protection with the need for children to learn responsibility
• Resources and support available for parents navigating technology issues

More Resources:

• PWF Tech Tools
• Free Webinar for Parents: Critical Conversations
• Creating a Tech-Healthy Family* by Andrea Davis

Related Podcasts:

• Better Screen Time for You and Your Family
• Brain Defense Digital Safety for Kids
• Keeping Kids Safe in a Digital World

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Joel opens up about his own history of pornography addiction and the isolating shame that came with it. He highlights how group work was crucial in his healing process, emphasizing the importance of community, grace, and accountability. We explore the essentials of a supportive group environment, the balance between grace and structure, and the need for action in recovery. Joel’s story and insights remind us that recovery thrives in the context of supportive relationships.

To learn more about Joel and his ministry’s resources, visit 423Communities.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of group work in recovery from addiction
• Personal experiences with addiction, particularly pornography
• Impact of isolation and shame on individuals in recovery
• Role of community and grace in the healing process
• Essentials of creating a supportive group environment
• Balancing grace and accountability in recovery
• Dynamics of group therapy and mutual support
• Understanding recovery as a journey beyond mere sobriety
• Concept of "paying it forward" in recovery
• Broader applicability of recovery principles for personal growth and transformation

More Resources:

• Join a 423 Communities group
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• Grace-Based Transformation*

Related Podcasts:

• How Can Recovery Lead to a New Growth Mission?
• A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional Growth
• Men Helping Men Grow and Mature

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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We dive into the transformative power of the Hope Rising Conference, a virtual conference for couples dealing with similar challenges. Brad shares how their recovery led them both to pursue careers in counseling, aiming to help others navigate their paths to healing. This episode is a testament to hope, honesty, and the power of God’s grace.

To learn about the Hope Rising Conference, visit AffairRecovery.com/hope-rising.

To learn more about Brad and Kristen’s counseling practice, visit RestfulMindTherapy.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Personal recovery and transformation from a troubled background
• Struggles with pornography and infidelity in marriage
• The impact of a dysfunctional family environment on personal development
• The journey of honesty and healing in relationships
• The emotional challenges faced by betrayed spouses
• The significance of community and support in the healing process
• The role of the Hope Rising Conference in providing resources for couples
• Understanding sexual addiction and its effects on relationships
• The importance of inclusivity for all forms of betrayal, including pornography addiction
• Vocational shifts towards counseling and helping others navigate similar challenges

More Resources:

• Register for Hope Rising Conference
• Help for Husbands
• Help for Wives

Related Podcasts:

• The Journey to Stay
• Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal
• Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model

----------

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We dive into the complexities of sexuality, intimacy, and how personal and cultural experiences shape these aspects of our lives. Dr. Tanksley shares her personal journey of learning about sexuality and intimacy, emphasizing the importance of addressing heart issues and healing from past wounds. We discuss the difference between intimacy and sexuality, the necessity of community support, and the concept of sexual wholeness. Finally, Dr. Carol offers practical advice on creating an escape plan for temptations and highlights the transformative power of faith and vulnerability.

To learn more about Carol and her resources, visit YourSexpectations.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Exploration of sexuality and intimacy in the context of faith and relationships.
• Personal experiences and motivations behind writing "Sexpectations."
• The distinction between intimacy and sexuality, emphasizing their different roles.
• The importance of addressing emotional wounds and their impact on sexual behavior.
• The concept of sexual wholeness and its three key aspects: releasing the past, right-sizing sexuality, and cultivating intimacy.
• The role of community in fostering intimacy and support for individuals.
• Strategies for creating an escape plan to manage temptations related to sexuality.
• The significance of submitting one's sexuality to Christ for transformation.
• The journey from forgiveness to personal transformation and purpose.
• The potential for healing and redemption from past traumas and experiences.

More Resources:

• Sexpectations* by Dr. Carol Tanksley
• Dr. Carol's Blog
• Rethinking Sexuality* by Dr. Juli Slattery

Related Podcasts:

• God, Sex, and Your Marriage
• What are Your Sexpectations?
• Identity and the Goodness of Sexuality

*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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In this episode, Stephen and I talk about the power of "co," meaning "together" or "jointly," in relationships and recovery. We dive into how collaboration and connection are essential for personal growth and healing, especially in marriage and overcoming addiction. 

Dr. Cervantes shares insights on co-parenting, co-planning, and co-nurturing, emphasizing that love and community are vital for a fulfilling life. We also discuss the church's role in fostering a sense of belonging and unity. Join us as we explore how embracing "co" can transform our lives and relationships.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The significance of the prefix "co" in relationships and community.
• The role of collaboration and partnership in personal growth and healing.
• The impact of addiction on connection and the importance of overcoming isolation.
• Practical applications of "co" in everyday life, such as co-parenting and co-planning.
• The challenges individuals face in embracing a "co" mentality, especially after trauma or addiction.
• The journey of co-expression and the importance of sharing desires and fears.
• The concept of co-nurturing and its relevance in supporting relationships.
• The role of the church in fostering community and addressing emotional and cultural needs.
• The idea of community as "common unity" and the importance of shared goals.
• Encouragement for listeners to actively seek connection and collaboration in their lives.

More Resources:

• Resources for Men
• Resources for Wives
• Resources for Families

Related Podcasts:

• The Goal is Connecting
• The 7 (or More) Pillars of Emotional Growth
• The Power of Community

----------

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Stacey’s healing process involved spiritual, emotional, and physical approaches, including prayer, music, and understanding the mind-body connection. Now, she helps other women navigate similar experiences through her platform, "Becoming Safe." 

To learn more about Stacey and her resources, visit BecomingSafe.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Healing and safety in the context of betrayal trauma
• Personal experiences of betrayal trauma in relationships
• Resurfacing of trauma and its physical symptoms
• The role of spiritual, emotional, and physical approaches in healing
• Importance of feeling safe and regulating the nervous system
• Impact of trauma on mental and physical health
• The concept of holistic healing encompassing spirit, soul, and body
• Tools and resources for women navigating similar experiences
• The significance of community support in the healing journey
• Addressing the interplay between personal healing and external circumstances

More Resources:

• Online Wives Care Groups
• Find a Counselor or Coach
• Free Wives Care Webinar

Related Podcasts:

• Self-Care and Rest for Wives Healing from Betrayal Trauma
• Emotional Transformation Therapy for Betrayed Wives
• Betrayal Healing Phases

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To learn more about Kate and her resources for wives, visit JourneyBeyondBetrayal.com.

To learn more about 423 Men’s groups, visit 423Communities.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The Conwells' journey through betrayal trauma in their marriage.
• Will's struggles with sexual brokenness and infidelity.
• The significance of sharing personal stories for healing and connection.
• The role of faith in overcoming challenges in relationships.
• The impact of early exposure to pornography on men's relationships.
• The process of confronting and addressing infidelity and its aftermath.
• The importance of self-awareness and communication in marriage.
• Messages of hope for individuals facing relationship struggles.
• Resources and support systems available for healing and recovery.

More Resources:

• Wives Care Online Groups
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• Help to Tell Your Story

Related Podcasts:

• Living More than a Love Story
• The Journey to Stay
• Betrayal Healing Phases

A key highlight of this episode features a movie character from our Gateway to Freedom workshop, who realizes his potential after being told, "You could have been great." This statement is loaded with powerful insights for men when they realize their lives are running on the wrong tracks. We want men to experience their full potential as image bearers of God; to know him fully and love others deeply.

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• The significance of emotional growth in men's lives.
• The role of relationships and male connections in personal development.
• The impact of societal expectations on men's focus on productivity and financial success.
• Reflections on personal experiences with fathers and male role models.
• The portrayal of an emotionally stunted character in a movie and its implications.
• The wake-up call of recognizing one's potential and the importance of relationships.
• The concept of greatness and how it relates to emotional and spiritual fulfillment.
• The importance of accountability and honest feedback among male friends.
• The transformative power of truth and listening to others' stories.
• Encouragement for men to prioritize emotional well-being and meaningful connections.

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups
• 49 Days of Growth*

Related Podcasts:

• Men's Emotional Self-Awareness Test
• A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional Growth
• What Can Stunt Your Emotional Growth Mission?

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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• Safety and stabilization, 
• Remembering and mourning, 
• Reconnection 

She emphasizes the importance of forgiveness, not as a pressured obligation but as a personal outcome of healing. We also discuss how friends and family can provide tangible support during this difficult time. 

For more information on Cat and her resources, visit nakedtruthproject.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Impact of betrayal on a wife and the process of healing and forgiveness
• Emotional aspects of navigating betrayal trauma
• Key stages of healing from betrayal trauma
• Importance of forgiveness in the healing process
• Readiness to forgive and precursors in the healing journey
• Differentiating between trauma triggers and grief
• Reconnecting with the world after betrayal trauma
• Support from friends and family for those experiencing betrayal trauma

More Resources:

• Wives Care Groups
• Wives Care Basics Webinar
• Counseling or Coaching

Related Podcasts:

• 8 Practical Steps of Forgiveness
• The Recovery Process for Couples
• Helping Wives Recover from the Aftershock of Sexual Betrayal

----------

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Thanks to a generous donor, we can offer a $75,000 match for gifts given between May 1 through July 31. Every dollar you give, collectively up to $75,000, will be DOUBLED!

Give Today and double your impact. Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, I welcome back Pastor Marty Machowski to discuss the pressing issue of identity, particularly sexual identity. Marty shares his experiences counseling families whose children are grappling with gender and sexual orientation issues. He highlights the rapid acceleration of these challenges and introduces his book, "God Made Boys and Girls," as a resource for parents. 

We delve into the impact of public education on children's understanding of identity, the importance of grounding identity in biblical truth, and the need for compassionate, open conversations between parents and children. 

Marty also shares insights from his support group, "Affirmed," offering hope and practical guidance for families.

To learn more about Marty and his resources for parents, visit MartyMachowski.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Identity and sexual orientation struggles in children
• Impact of public education on children's understanding of identity
• Disconnecting physical reality from emotional and subjective feelings
• Diversity within gender categories and its impact on identity
• Trauma and abuse's impact on individuals struggling with gender identity
• Biblical perspective on identity and being made in the image of God
• Importance of open and honest conversations with children about identity and gender
• Transitioning from being disciplinarians to influencers in children's lives
• Facilitating support groups for families dealing with identity and sexual orientation struggles
• Encouraging parents to build a foundation of relationship and compassion with their children

More Resources:

• God Made Boys and Girls* by Marty Machowski
• Critical Conversations Webinar (Free!)
• Identity* by John Fort

Related Podcasts:

• God Made Boys and Girls
• Exposing the Gender Lie
• Identity and the Goodness of Sexuality

*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Thanks to a generous donor, we can offer a $75,000 match for gifts given between May 1 through July 31. Every dollar you give, collectively up to $75,000, will be DOUBLED!

Give Today and double your impact. Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, I welcome back Carol Juergensen Sheets, better known as Carol the Coach, a certified sex addiction therapist. We reminisce about her last appearance in March 2020, where we focused on empathy for husbands. Carol shares her journey since 2007, emphasizing the importance of empathy in all relationships. 

She introduces her Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model (ERCEM), which involves working with both partners from the start to foster post-traumatic growth. Carol explains the role of empathy in healing from infidelity, highlighting the long-term process and the need for genuine understanding. She also provides resources for couples seeking support and offers a hopeful message for those on their healing journey.

To learn more about Carol and her resources, visit SexHelpWithCarolTheCoach.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Carol's background and expertise in sex addiction therapy
• The importance of empathy in relationships
• Development of the Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model (ERCEM)
• Key elements and focus of ERCEM
• The role of empathy within ERCEM
• Challenges and time required for healing from infidelity
• Common misconceptions about empathy
• Progress and resources available for couples seeking support
• Message of hope and encouragement for couples dealing with infidelity

More Resources:

• Help Them Heal Couples Workshop
• Help Them Heal book
• Help Them Heal online course

Related Podcasts:

• Helping Husbands Learn and Practice Empathy
• 4 Skills to Transform Your Marriage
• The Recovery Process for Couples

----------

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Thanks to a generous donor, we can offer a $75,000 match for gifts given between May 1 through July 31. Every dollar you give, collectively up to $75,000, will be DOUBLED!

Give Today and double your impact. Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, I chat with Crystal Renaud Day about the SHE Virtual Recovery Summit, a transformative event for women battling unwanted sexual behaviors like pornography addiction. Crystal shares her personal journey and insights from years of ministry, emphasizing the importance of surrender, accountability, and community in recovery. 

We discuss the summit's role in providing a safe, supportive space for women and even teens to find healing and resources. Crystal's passion for helping women shines through, and we invite listeners to join the summit and take steps toward wholeness in Christ.

To learn more about the SHE Summit and register, visit SheRecovery.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• SHE Virtual Recovery Summit
• Support and resources for women struggling with unwanted sexual behaviors
• Personal experiences and insights from Crystal Renaud Day
• Importance and topics covered during the event
• Research on women's view of porn
• Training for women in recovery
• Ministry to women dealing with unwanted sexual behaviors
• Stories of transformation and victory
• She Virtual Recovery Summit as a space for learning, growth, and surrender
• The significance of surrender, confession, accountability, responsibility, and sharing in the recovery process

More Resources:

• SHE Virtual Recovery Summit (use affiliate code BEBROKEN for a 10% discount!)
• What Drives Women to Porn? Survey Results
• 90 Days to Wholeness* by Crystal Renaud Day

Related Podcasts:

• New Research on Why Women View Porn
• Total Freedom for Women Struggling with Porn
• God's Grace for Women Struggling with Porn and Sexual Shame

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

----------

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Thanks to a generous donor, we can offer a $75,000 match for gifts given between May 1 through July 31. Every dollar you give, collectively up to $75,000, will be DOUBLED!

Give Today and double your impact. Thank you for your support!

----------

In this episode, Stephen and I dive into the journey of emotional self-awareness, especially for men – and offer a simple test to measure self-awareness. We explore the different levels of self-awareness, from complete unawareness to deep emotional understanding. 

Stephen shares his inspiration for creating this self-awareness test, aiming to help men gauge their emotional awareness so they can continue toward greater awareness and maturity. We discuss how family history shapes emotional patterns and the importance of recognizing triggers. 

Our conversation emphasizes the significance of aligning with the Holy Spirit and striving for emotional maturity. 

For more insight from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Emotional self-awareness and self-awareness test for men
• Different levels of emotional self-awareness
• Connection between triggers and emotional responses
• Impact of family of origin on emotional patterns and behaviors
• Development of a self-awareness test for men
• Challenges men face in understanding and expressing emotions
• Importance of recognizing and acknowledging one's feelings
• Impact of family of origin on emotional development
• Physical and emotional connections, retraining the mind and emotions
• Alignment with the Holy Spirit and emotional program, journey of growth and maturity

More Resources:

• The Men's Emotional Self-Awareness Test
• Growth Map* by Stephen Cervantes
• Grace-Based Transformation* by Jonathan Daugherty

Related Podcasts:

• How Can Recovery Lead to a New Growth Mission?
• 100 Recovery Rules (with Mark Denison)
• A 3-Year Roadmap for Recovery and Emotional Growth

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Stephen and I stress the need for honesty, vulnerability, and self-reflection in achieving emotional growth and maturity. We encourage listeners to embrace uncertainty and seek support, underscoring that emotional maturity is a continuous process of growth and understanding.

For more insights from Dr. Cervantes, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Emotional maturity and self-awareness
• Impact of childhood experiences on adult behavior
• Recognizing and addressing emotional immaturity
• Role of grief in the process of emotional healing
• Impact of critical parenting on self-criticism and judgmental behavior
• Shaping oneness in relationships
• Grief and fear in recognizing emotional patterns and transformation
• Importance of admitting uncertainty and vulnerability
• Embracing the journey of growth and change
• Seeking support and guidance for personal and relational growth

More Resources:

• 49 Days of Growth* by Stephen Cervantes
• Growth Map: The Pathway to Peace, Rest, and Joy* by Stephen Cervantes
• Untangling Emotions* by Groves and Smith

Related Podcasts:

• Moving from Being Fear-Driven to Love-Driven
• Why Men Need to Practice Sadness
• How Brokenness Fits with Wholeness in Christ

*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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In our conversation, Dan and Jaunice walk us through the disclosure process, emphasizing the impact of betrayal, readiness for disclosure, tailored approaches, the “choreography” of disclosure, and the post-disclosure phase that highlights potential obstacles when rebuilding trust. 

To get access to Dan and Janice’s resources, visit KintsugiRecoveryPartners.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Development of resources for disclosure in marriages affected by sexual betrayal
• Availability of resources on Kintsugi Recovery Partners website
• Impact of sexual betrayal on relationships
• Definition of disclosure and its importance in healing
• Importance of readiness for disclosure
• Tailored approaches to disclosure based on each couple's unique situation
• Process and key elements of disclosure
• Choreography of the disclosure process
• Significance of disclosure in healing and rebuilding trust

More Resources:

• Full Disclosure: How to Share the Truth After Betrayal*
• Full Disclosure: Seeking the Truth After Betrayal*
• Disclosure Guide Training

Related Podcasts:

• Understanding Therapeutic Disclosure in Marriage Affected by Sexual Betrayal
• Confession and Disclosure for Couples
• How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Thanks to a generous donor, we can offer a $75,000 match for gifts given between May 1 through July 31. Every dollar you give, collectively up to $75,000, will be DOUBLED!

Give Today and double your impact. Thank you for your support!

----------

In today's episode, I have a heart-to-heart with Stephen Cervantes about the journey of recovery. We dive into how it's more than just getting back on your feet; it's about pausing, finding stability, and reaching out for a helping hand. But that's not the end of the road! 

Recovery is this beautiful bridge to an exciting phase of self-discovery and growth. Together, we unpack the deeper mission that lies ahead—embracing the love of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and getting to know ourselves better. 

So, if you're curious about turning a new leaf and finding purpose post-recovery, this chat is for you. Join us as we explore these transformative steps to a fuller, love-filled life!

For daily insights from Stephen, visit DoctorMarriage.org.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Concept of recovery and transition to a new growth mission
• Importance of stopping and stabilizing in recovery
• Seeking outside help and community support
• Recovery as a bridge to discovery and growth
• Purpose of new growth mission: learning about love of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, understanding oneself
• Different interpretations of recovery
• Role of relationships and community in the recovery process
• Recovery as a journey toward growth and learning
• Shift in focus from negative behaviors to love and personal understanding
• Emphasis on community, outside help, and shift in focus towards love and personal understanding

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups
• Grace-Based Transformation* book

Related Podcasts:

• For Men Who Want to Finish Strong
• What Can Stunt Your Emotional Growth Mission?
• Understanding 4 Key Roles in Your Story

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Thanks to a generous donor, we can offer a $75,000 match for gifts given between May 1 through July 31. Every dollar you give, collectively up to $75,000, will be DOUBLED!

Give Today and double your impact. Thank you for your support!

----------

In today’s episode, we have Vern Tompke back with us. Vern is our Canadian pastor and coach who helps other pastors and men break free from unwanted sexual behaviors. 

We talked about the three key stages of recovery, which are: 

1. Breaking the habit
2. Addressing the deep-seated issues of the heart and mind
3. Recalibrating sexuality to enjoy the abundant life Christ offers

Whether you are just starting your recovery journey or years into it, Vern’s wisdom is a beacon of hope. And we mention lots of really good resources that will help you along the way, which we will include in the show notes. 

To learn more about Vern and his resources, visit BandofBrothers.care.

Topics Covered in This Episode:

• Three stages of recovery from porn addiction
• Breaking the habit
• Dealing with underlying issues
• Redeeming or recalibrating one's sexuality
• Importance of practical tools, boundaries, and grace-filled accountability
• Addressing underlying lies, pain, wounds, attachment issues, and unmet needs
• The ongoing nature of the recovery journey
• Emphasizing the need to move beyond objectification and consumption of beauty
• Encouraging men to engage in real relationships and build healthy social and coping skills
• Advocating for living in the light, engaging in community, and seeking a fuller understanding of recovery

More Resources:

• Willpower Doesn't Work* by Benjamin Hardy
• The Thing Beneath the Thing* by Steve Carter
• The Psychology of Porn* by Andrew Bauman

Related Podcasts:

• The Stopwatch Acting Out Cycle
• Understanding Freedom, Identity, and Creativity in Addiction Recovery
• A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional Growth

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Understanding Freedom – We start by exploring the true meaning of freedom. It's not just about breaking free from unwanted behaviors like porn addiction; it's about finding peace, rest, and joy. We're talking about aligning with the soul's fundamental needs, as taught by Jesus himself.

From Selfish to Selfless – We've all been there, right? Putting ourselves first, fast, and completely. But here's the kicker: the more we focus on ourselves, the less satisfied we feel. It's a paradox that we unpack with humor, honesty, and a touch of humility.

A New Perspective – Imagine realizing that your whole life has been a race to put yourself first, only to end up feeling empty. That's the story of a Christian brother who woke up to his selfishness addiction. It's a powerful moment of vulnerability that might just change the way you see your own life.

Growth and Healing – This episode isn't just about identifying the problem; it's about finding the path to healing. We discuss the importance of taking small steps towards giving, towards others, and towards a life filled with genuine connection.

So, if you've ever felt caught in the cycle of coping and surviving rather than truly living, this episode is for you. It's time to break free from the chains of selfishness and step into a life of selfless joy.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Selfishness addiction and its impact on behavior and relationships
• Understanding the difference between healthy self-care and selfishness
• Selfishness driven by fear and focus on one's own desires and needs
• The concept of freedom and its relation to the deeper needs of individuals
• The importance of aligning with the fundamental needs of the soul
• The distinction between healthy self-awareness and selfishness
• The detrimental impact of selfishness on individuals and their relationships
• The immature and wounded nature of selfishness addiction
• The natural order of relationships and the importance of learning to be selfless while still caring for oneself
• The insight and honesty of admitting and addressing selfishness addiction

More Resources:

• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
• DoctorMarriage.org
• Find a Counselor

Related Podcasts:

• Self-Care vs. Selfishness
• About Your Emotional Connecting Skills
• It's All About Me!

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Please rate and review our podcast: Apple Podcasts

Subscribe to our YouTube channel.

Shawna then shares about setting boundaries, the importance of individual growth, and how she and her husband both worked on themselves to rebuild trust. 

Her story is a testament to the complexities of love and the resilience and faith needed to navigate them. As a result of this journey, Shawna turned her personal trials into a passion for coaching and helping others through their own relationship struggles. 

To learn more about Shawna and her resources, visit LivingStoneCoaching.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Shauna Meek's personal story and experiences
• Navigating neurodiversity challenges in relationships and marriage
• Seeking help and setting boundaries
• Healing and recovery process
• Individual coping strategies and personal growth
• Building trust and safety in a marriage
• Lessons learned about oneself and each other
• Transformation and growth in relationships
• Overcoming communication differences
• Reconciliation and remarriage

More Resources:

• Determined for More* by Shawna Meek
• Neurodiverse Coaching and Mentoring
• Hope Restored

Related Podcasts:

• The Journey to Stay
• Conflict Management for Marriages Healing from Betrayal
• Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.

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Please rate and review our podcast: Apple Podcasts

Subscribe to our YouTube channel.

Danisa has put together an incredible e-course called "The Story of Her," (https://ccicourses.org/thestoryofher) and she's here to share why it's so essential for women to recognize and celebrate their unique design and to confidently step into their womanhood. We're not shying away from the difficult topics either—we discuss how to heal from past wounds and pursue a godly approach to sexual fulfillment. Plus, Danisa’s got some solid, actionable tips for anyone looking for support on this path. 

This episode is all about empowering women and deepening their relationship with God. Make sure you don't miss out on Danisa’s valuable insights—follow her on Instagram for more inspiring talks! @danisasuarezoficial

Topics Covered in this Episode:

• Importance of understanding women's bodies and sexuality
• Influences affecting women's self-image
• Fighting against comparison
• Challenges faced by women who have experienced brokenness, abuse, or sexual violations
• Lack of mentorship and education for women regarding their bodies
• Impact of social media, mass media, and culture on women's self-image
• Women's sexuality and its connection to confidence, knowledge, and attitudes
• Challenges and roadblocks in the journey towards sexual health and wholeness
• Importance of seeking support and guidance in the journey towards sexual health and wholeness
• Empowerment, encouragement, and finding fulfillment in the relationship with God