Rabbit Troop Sucks

The Nice Guys

Fri, 22 May 2026 06:00:12 +0000

In 1977, through a strange series of events, tough guy for hire, Jackson Healy (Russell Crowe), and PI Holland March (Ryan Gosling) team up to find a missing girl, Amelia (Margaret Qualley), and to unravel a mystery with a dead porn star. Somehow these two manage to get things done – most likely because Holland’s daughter, Holly (Angourie Rice), is the most sensible amongst them. In the background there are fights, conspiracies, acts of government corruption, strange protests against the air, John Boy (Matt Bomer) is gun happy and on the loose and there are glamorous porn star parties in mansions. RTS avoids falling from balconies, rooftops, etc… Jeremy cracks open a nice cold Yoohoo. It puts a slight dance in his step. La-Mar makes sure his cookie jar is full of bullets. You never know. Collin learns that all cars drive themselves. Just let go. If things get out of control, grab the ankle gun in your dreams.

Welcome to Collinwood

Fri, 15 May 2026 06:00:00 +0000

How could we not check this film out? Collin has welcomed us all – to his wooden ways. Cosimo (Greendale Community College Alum, Luis Guzmán) gets locked up and learns about the perfect heist from his cellmate. He just needs to get out to do it. He confides in his gal pal Rosalind (Patricia Clarkson) which leads to everyone knowing and wanting a piece for themselves. This includes Pero (Sam Rockwell), Riley (William H. Macy), Leon (Isaiah Washington) and Toto (Michael Jeter). This makes Cosimo angry, and he has a lot to say about everyone’s mothers. In the background, there’s a bit of romance between Pero and Carmela (Jennifer Esposito). Will anyone care? George Clooney is even doing some stuff here. RTS knows when there’s a real Bellini on the table. This isn’t it. Jeremy considers being a Mullinski but the price has to be just right. La-Mar finds hidden treasures in the cookie jar. Collin has already given you everything. He has welcomed you. Isn’t that enough for you? Don’t let this turn into a real Kapuchnik.

The Barbarians

Fri, 08 May 2026 06:00:59 +0000

In a fantasy land, it all comes down to who can control a magic ruby. You know a bunch of villains want this thing! Canary (Virgina Bryant) is taken captive by Kadar (Richard Lynch), and her band of traveling entertainers are either killed, or they have scattered into the woods. Luckily, Canary has hidden the ruby, but for how long will it stay secure? Enter the twin hunky boy glisten show! Gore (David Paul) and Kutchek (Peter Paul) traveled with Canary and were separated as kids. Once they reconnect and fight it out a bit, they decide to escape and to become do-gooders. Along the way, they meet up with Ismene (Eva LaRue) who has her own backstory going on. As the three travel together, evil beware! RTS loves obtaining magical weapons to fight a swamp dragon. GOO! Jeremy does and doesn’t want you to know about his mini crossbow. La-Mar develops a plan with China (Sheeba Alahani) to get the ruby for themselves. Get your swamp boots ready! Collin starts putting the ruby everywhere and on everyone to see if it glows. Eventually, it does! See ya at the harem.

Passenger 57

Fri, 01 May 2026 06:00:19 +0000

Authorities have finally caught international terrorist Charles Rane (Bruce Payne). The best thing to do is book him on a nice first-class flight to L.A. Seems like this guy needs a steak and a fun in-flight film. John Cutter (Wesley Snipes) has just accepted a new position in an anti-terrorism unit, and he is undercover on this flight. So, inevitably when this all goes bonkers quickly, Cutter will be on the case. He will also bicker with Marti (Alex Datcher) while terrorism runs rampant. It’s all about priorities. Sly Delvecchio (Tom Sizemore) looms in the background. RTS deboards the plane and immediately heads to the fairgrounds with Elizabeth Hurley. Let’s win her an oversized stuffed animal. Jeremy has a corndog and some funnel cake on a Ferris wheel. If there’s room, he might have a beer and a bratwurst later. La-Mar makes sure to order his airline sirloin bloody. It becomes questionable. Brendt goes reverse-Commando on a plane. He also updates his turquoise earring collection. Do you think most of this film will be on a plane? You’ll be betting on red if that is the case.

Cobra

Fri, 24 Apr 2026 06:00:29 +0000

A gang of hoodlums is being led by the infamous Night Slasher (Brian Thompson). They all seem directionless in their crime plans. There are a lot of axes clinking to signify their unity. Kind of a weird scene here. Nevertheless, there is only one man who can save this city – maybe even the nation, Marion Cobretti (Sylvester Stallone). “Call the Cobra.” If you’ve seen this guy cut a slice of pizza with some scissors, then you know what is needed. Now, Cobra must protect a witness, Ingrid (Brigitte Nielsen) to end the crimes. All the crimes! Along the way, you will learn where the law stops and Cobra starts. He’ll even tell people that! RTS learns that Cobra doesn’t like lousy shots, diseases, profanity in public or poor manners. Respect! La-Mar goes on many candy runs with Cobra’s partner, Gonzales (Reni Santoni). We’re going to get some Whatchamacallits and ZAGNUTs up in here. Collin starts constructing a little book of puns and snappy one-liners. Cobra pays him handsomely for this work. Do these baddies even have a plan? The answer to that is no. We’ll see you all at the fire factory.

New York Ninja

Fri, 17 Apr 2026 06:00:51 +0000

This film was shot in 1984. When it was retrieved, there was no sound or script. Vinegar Syndrome found this film and put it back together. A new cast has dubbed this film, and this was then released in 2021. What we are given as an audience is pure New York Ninja awesomeness! RTS even takes a field trip to view this one. John Liu (played by John Liu and dubbed by Don Wilson) is just a fella living his life. A bunch of street thugs kill his pregnant wife, and then John becomes sad. Very forlorn! Only one thing to do! Become a ninja and seek vengeance upon all criminals in New York. Good thing because The Plutonium Killer (voiced by Michael Berryman) is melting people (and himself), women are being abducted and fear is sweeping through New York. Along the way, John will befriend a kid and unify a city with their love of the ninja! RTS appreciates monogrammed throwing stars. We need to update our merch. Jeremy tosses powder bags into everyone’s face – guilty or not! BAM! Powder bag! Collin picks up roller-skating based on this film. We didn’t see that coming. And you won’t see a ninja in white coming either! That’s just a cloud.

Big Trouble in Little China

Fri, 10 Apr 2026 06:00:47 +0000

A sweet, elderly gentleman, David Lo Pan (James Hong), simply wants a date. He has a reasonable kink, green eyes. People laugh at him. Can’t a (evil sorcerer) romantic find happiness? Meanwhile, Jack Burton (Kurt Russell) hangs out with his friend Wang (Dennis Dun) for a long night of drinking and an early airport run. Wang loses his love. Jack also loses his love, his truck. So much trouble! Is this story more about Chinese mysticism and world ending consequences or an old man’s attempt at love? RTS learns that there might not be an “off switch” on the Lo Pan lamp. It’s a thing! Jeremy saddles up and rustles up a “firm” howdy to Gracie Law (Kim Cattrall). La-Mar samples the cuisine over at Uncle Chu’s (Chao Li Chi). Positive reviews! Collin teams up with Egg Shen (Victor Wong) and uses five out of the six demons in the bag. You better watch out; he’s got one left for you! Brent brews and serves some gourd juice. You will now become smoke and dream. It will get, um, interesting. Check out this amazing John Carpenter flick! You need to remember that “you were not brought upon this world to ‘get it’” and listen to the Porkchop Express. Green flames!

Night of the Lepus

Fri, 03 Apr 2026 06:00:53 +0000

Easter is upon us! Everybody, run! Cole Hillman (Rory Calhoun) is getting sick and tired of bunnies (yes, cute and amazing bunnies) digging up his ranch. He is directed to get some help from a researcher at the local college. When researcher Roy Bennett (Stuart Whitman) isn’t harassing bats in a cage, he’s injecting rabbits with serums. Crazy serums! Things go wrong, and, now, these mutated rabbits are large and in charge! Roy’s wife, Gerry (Janet Leigh), at least has a road flare for defense. RTS befriends all the rabbits. It was destiny! Mike somehow got lepused! Jeremy hangs out with captain Billy in a fun shack. La-Mar plans to “blow three holes” with the help of Elgin Clark (DeForest Kelley). It’s the only way to get the job done! Collin creates an electric train track trap. It’s like Mouse Trap but for giant, angry buns. Don’t let the mutant Lepus get you this Easter. Make it more about hidden egg scavenger hunts and marshmallow and chocolate goodies.

Blind Fury

Fri, 27 Mar 2026 06:00:16 +0000

Frank Devereaux (Terry O’Quinn) loves betting on stuff. Don’t really know why and with what funds, but he’s dug himself into a debt hole. Now, a bunch of drug dealing Reno bad guys kidnap his son, Billy (Brandon Call), and force Frank to make ground up Smurf dust. Kinda like Gargamel’s Breaking Bad. Enter: Nick Parker (Rutger Hauer). He served in Vietnam with Frank. Nick lost his sight there, but he has been spending his time training as a swordsman. Acorn squash beware! Now, he’s back in the states with his sword cane, and he’s going to knock around plenty of skulls as he rides around on buses with Billy. RTS learns how to clean up your eyebrows and neck beard with a gentle swish of a sword. Jeremy electrifies us all with his sparking death hot tub. La-Mar was told that his “butter knife ain’t gonna stop no bullet.” Oddly, it does. It stops many bullets – and it helps butter his bread. Is Bruce Lee’s brother showing up to this?

Role Models

Fri, 20 Mar 2026 06:00:39 +0000

Danny (Paul Rudd) and Wheeler (Seann William Scott) work together pimping out some sweet energy juice. Danny is in a rut, asks his long-term girlfriend, Beth (Elizabeth Banks), to marry him and completely fails. He then totally freaks out and winds himself and Wheeler into some serious community service/probation time at a big brother program, Sturdy Wings. This program is directed by the amazing Gayle (Jane Lynch). Danny is unenthusiastically thrust into a world of LARPing with Augie (Christopher Mintz-Plasse). Wheeler and Ronnie (Robb’e J. Thompson) learn to bond over shared obsessions. Better than prison, right? Right!? RTS would NEVER BS a BSer. Jeremy demands that everyone “gingerly touch our tips.” La-Mar learns that Monopoly is “based on true events.” Collin observes the hotdog trick. Boop! Compliment a loved one’s “whispering eye” before slumber. Maybe you need a re-role here. Let’s wreck shop in the name of Kiss-My-Anthia!

Sidekicks

Fri, 13 Mar 2026 06:00:19 +0000

Barry, Barry. Why ya buggin? Barry Gabrewski (Jonathan Brandis) lives in his fantasies. Although creative, these dreams interfere with his real life. In all of these daydreams, Barry is the sidekick to Chuck Norris. Seems like some normal stuff there. Because of this, Barry has a hard time at school. His teacher, Noreen Chan (Julia Nickson), assists Barry and his dad, Jerry (Beau Bridges), and introduces them to her spirited uncle, Mr. Lee (Mako). Lee takes Barry on for Karate instruction, and we are treated to an array of training montages, awkward conversations with Lauren (Danica McKellar) and wild faces from Kelly Stone (Joe Piscopo). RTS discovers that all cures come from kitchen sink potions. Jeremey falls in love with this film and is now actively training in Karate. La-Mar takes his metal nunchucks and chucks everything! Collin will make sure that you “respect the wood.” When we break a bunch of bricks, we’ll make sure they’re on fire! Everyone seems cool with that.

Dogma

Fri, 06 Mar 2026 07:00:24 +0000

It’s our 200^th episode! Thank you for listening along the way. Two rogue angels, Bartleby (Ben Affleck) and Loki (Matt Damon) have been banned from heaven. Now, through a loophole that Cardinal Glick (George Carlin) has accidentally created, these angles might re-enter heaven and put an end to everything and everyone. Because of Bethany’s (Linda Fiorentino) bloodline, she is sent on a mission to save us all. Thankfully, she is aided by the holiest of duos, Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Kevin Smith). RTS starts changing water into wine. You’re not even ready to see what they change Kool-Aid into. Serendipity (Salma Hayek) approves. Jeremy searches for fun religious artifacts. In the end, he comes to collect on the $12 JC owes Rufus (Chris Rock). Collin buys some fancy pants for the rapture. He’s looking stylish. Brent and Metatron (Alan Rickman) get mouthy with some shots of tequila. Swish, swish! Let’s get another round! Thanks, again, for listening to our fun. We’ll keep it going even after the apocalypse. Here’s to 200 more!

Overlord

Fri, 27 Feb 2026 07:00:49 +0000

This comes to us as a listener request from Yung Cazzy! Great choice! On the eve of D-Day, several paratrooper survivors assemble and set forward to take down a radio tower that’s jamming up their airwaves. Led by Cpl. Ford (Wyatt Russell) and driven by PFC Boyce (Jovan Adepo), they team up with a local, Chloe (Mathilde Ollivier), to sneak around the village and take down a bunch of scum sucking Nazis. Along the way, they capture Captain Wafner (Pilou Asbæk) and learn of horrific secret experiments being conducted. RTS likes sticking to the original plan of blowing up the tower from the outside. They are also digging on these fresh baguettes. Jeremy injects everyone with mysterious serums and asks questions later. Later, as in he is on a bus going far, far away. Collin quickly realizes that he’ll have to explode everyone. He does! They have all been exploded! Get him a baguette! Thank you, again, for suggesting this fun, dark and adventurous tale.

The Last of Sheila

Fri, 20 Feb 2026 07:00:55 +0000

Who did it? Did you? You’ve gone and done it!? We think you should watch this film before you listen – if you’re into things like that. A year after his wife, Sheila (Yvonne Romain), is killed in a hit-and-run, Clinton (James Coburn) gets all toothy and wild and gathers some “friends” together on his big ol’ yacht. Tom (Richard Benjamin), Philip (James Mason), Christine (Dyan Cannon), Lee (Joan Hackett), Anthony (Ian McShane) and Alice (Raquel Welch) are all willing to do whatever it takes to work on Clinton’s next project. Once they all assemble, Clinton crafts a scavenger hunt that reveals many secrets and the killer. RTS trusts no one from the start but enjoys the view. Mike is missing! What have you all done? Jeremy floats around with Christine but away from the death propellers. La-Mar samples the many luxuries of the yacht. He may be calling this place home. Collin tries to match each drink Tom and Philip have. It’s impossible! We all need to work on our boat fortitude. Next time you’re on a yacht with a bunch of money-grubbing weirdos, let us know. We like to party!

City Hunter

Fri, 13 Feb 2026 07:00:19 +0000

Happy Lunar New Year! It’s the year of the horse. Let your ventures and transformations lead you to accomplishing your goals that you have been reflecting upon. Let’s celebrate with Jackie Chan and some Hong Kong cinema fun. Ryo Saeba (Jackie Chan) is known as City Hunter. He swore to his now deceased partner that he would look after his sister Kaori (Joey Wang). No funny business! City Hunter is hired to find a client’s missing daughter, Kiyoko (Kumiko Goto). Once located, everyone conveniently finds their way to a cruise. The dance number is AMAZING! You’ll love Hard and Soft! Unfortunately, there are a bunch of terrorists on board. They are led by “Big Mac” MacDonald (Richard Norton), and now City Hunter has to shut that nonsense down. RTS learns baccarat and the art of throwing deadly playing cards. Jeremy contemplates the many bowls of rice he has eaten over the years. So much rice and continuous hunger! La-Mar wonders if everything Street Fighter in this film was a fever dream. Yoga Flame! Collin helps City Hunter find a meal. It’s a decent meal. No one eats goo bread! This film is based on the manga work of Tsukasa Hojo. Have fun with this zany adaptation. City Hunter!

Devil's Express

Fri, 06 Feb 2026 07:00:04 +0000

A long time ago, a demon was trapped in a medallion and that medallion was then buried. While two martial artists, Luke Curtis (Warhawk Tanzania) and Rodan (Wilfredo Roldan), vacation in Hong Kong, Rodan finds It and brings it back to the U.S. That demon, now loose, does NOT like that business! So, it tracks these fellas back to New York City (where you get picante sauce). This monster then takes residence in the subway system where it starts attacking people. Between gang fights, inept policing and friends doing weird things, Luke is juggling a lot! Now, he has to take care of some smelly (we assume) subway monster. Good luck, buddy! RTS grabs some lunch with the Red Dragons. It’s amazing! Jeremy paints on some eyes and roams the streets. Another day on Colfax! La-Mar gets questionable spiritual assistance from a man whose face is falling apart. The real takeaway from this film (also known as Gang Wars) is: put all of your problems in an ancient, magical amulet and bury it deep! You’ll be fine.

Out Cold

Fri, 30 Jan 2026 07:00:36 +0000

A group of fun-loving snowboarders are about to lose their jobs when the resort they work at is being sold to John Major (Lee Majors). Rick Rambis (Jason London), Luke (Zach Galifianakis), Jenny (A.J. Cook), and others band together to make sure the Bull Mountain party in Alaska never ends. You know the story. We’ve been here before, but can Rick win over the woman he’s yearning for? Does he even want to? The life of Ram-man Rambis is strange. Can we celebrate Papa Muntz (Lewis Arquette) properly? There is a Playboy Playmate (Victoria Silvstedt) on set!? RTS shreds with Majors. A cocktail tail in one hand/a dream in another. Jeremy investigates the entire backlog of the original The Fall Guy series. He is now working as a bounty hunter by night. La-Mar tests the freshness of the mountain pow. It is and isn’t exactly what you think it is. Collin is delighted to high-five after evicting others and receiving security duty. Let’s get some snow here in real life. Snow gods, dump thee snow upon us!

Memoirs of an Invisible Man

Fri, 23 Jan 2026 07:00:35 +0000

Nick Halloway (Chevy Chase) is a stock market executive. Through his colleague/maybe friend George (Michael McKean,) Nick meets Alice Monroe (Daryl Hannah) and they bang it out in a bathroom at a restaurant. True love! Nick keeps his party going, drinks himself silly and then attends a client’s conference the next day. Hungover as hell, he sneaks off and takes a lil’ catnap in an office bathroom/sauna. Also, some high-level science stuff is going on and going wrong. Through a coffee spill accident, everything goes bonks and all that was in the building (including Nick) turns invisible. Now, the government, especially CIA official David Jenkins (Sam Neill), wants Nick so they can harness his molecules. RTS shacks up at George’s beach house and goes on the new all clear food fad diet. Jeremy uses this newfound power for nefarious purposes. La-Mar teaches us that playing the stocks is always a guaranteed success. Collin reveals himself, watches this film and then decides to go ghost-invisible again. Rami immediately goes to Switzerland. It has always been the only choice. What would you do with the power of invisibility?

I Bought A Vampire Motorcycle

Fri, 16 Jan 2026 07:00:06 +0000

Buyer beware in this story! A biker gang kills an occult leader trying to summon a demon. This demon then fuses itself into a motorcycle (duh!). Noddy (Neil Morrissey) purchases this motorcycle from a friend (for a questionable price). It becomes quickly apparent that this bike is an evil vampire demon force that thirsts for blood. Noddy just wants to fondle his girlfriend Kim (Amanda Noar) and have a good time at the local pub. It’s not going to happen! Inspector Cleaver (Michael Elphick) and his garlic breath will be checking into all of this. RTS teams up with Priest (Anthony Daniels) to fight the forces of evil and to decipher “the binary language of moisture vaporators.” Jeremy does things with a crossbow that will tantalize and haunt you. La-Mar causally watches a group of jocks explode at the gym. Collin successfully orders and receives the coveted bag of crisps. Rami gets a galaxy of garlic prawns. “Three prawns are hardly a galaxy.” At least the garlic helps! After this flick, let’s all grab a bite to eat.

Zapped!

Fri, 09 Jan 2026 07:00:34 +0000

Two high schoolers are up to some standard fantasy youthful stuff. Barney Springboro (Scott Baio) is a science pro! While working in the lab, he accidentally concocts a formula that gives him telekinesis. His buddy, Peyton Nichols (Willie Aames), wants to harness that power to get women out of their tops and to win some serious money betting. Barney doesn’t seem to like that idea all too much, but he doesn’t have a better one of his own. Really, there doesn’t seem to be a plan to use any of these powers. Bernadette (Felice Schachter) is trying to study these unique abilities – and all of Barney. Principal Coolidge (Robert Mandan) is just trying to get a date. RTS accompanies Dexter (Scatman Crothers) in the boiler room. That’s where the real party is. There’s A LOT of salami talk. Jeremy chugs some beers and heads to the Tilt-a-Whirl. La-Mar goes full Zap at the prom. Watch out for flying fruit and the firehose. Collin wields true ultimate power; everyone now thinks he’s possessed. Teens with undefined powers and lofty dreams! What could go wrong?

Highlander

Fri, 02 Jan 2026 07:00:49 +0000

Through a series of moments in time, we learn about Connor MacLeod (Christopher Lambert) who was born in the highlands of Scotland. He is an immortal swordsman who has been trained by Ramirez (Sean Connery) and prepares for “The Gathering” in NYC. The winner will obtain “The Prize.” As the end battle approaches, the Kurgan (Clancy Brown) is going on a murderous rampage – immortals or not. He is determined to be the only one, “there can be only one.” In addition to this immortal battle, Brenda (Roxanne Hart) is working forensics and is trying to get a peek at Connor’s mythical sword (all puns intended). RTS sets up an amazing multilevel antique shop/home. You never know where the elevators will take you. Jeremy starts calling everyone a “haggis.” La-Mar hangs out with Macleod’s cousin Dougal. That guy knows where to get a drink. Collin whips up some baked goods for “The Gathering.” It’s nice to have refreshments at a time like this. Sharpen your blades, watch your necks and let Queen drive the music in this 80s fantasy adventure. “Who wants to live forever?”

Commando

Fri, 26 Dec 2025 07:00:26 +0000

John Matrix (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is a sweet, ex-military man trying to live his retired life with his daughter, Jenny (Alyssa Milano). When he’s not logging or walking around with logs, he’s eating ice cream and feeding wild deer. Now, Arius (Dan Hedaya) and his number one thug, Bennett (Vernon Wells), pull John back into the game by kidnapping Jenny. John is all Command-NO about it! He somehow teams up with Cindy (Rae Dawn Chong) to fly planes and get things done. Is Cindy the new mom? RTS checks out some brochures to Val Verde. Between the warlords, plotting and potential alien monsters, this place has something for everyone. La-Mar tells a bunch of people they’ll die last. He lied about it. They’re taken out rather quickly. Collin starts wearing his own chainmail vest. The trend has started to take off. Brent makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut by jumping out of a plane and leaving bodies along the way. Also, he’s going full commando! ‘Tis the season!

Office Christmas Party

Tue, 23 Dec 2025 07:00:07 +0000

We’ve got a bonus episode, birthday boy Jeremy and more Christmas Fun! Carol Vanstone (Jennifer Aniston) is going full Grinch and is planning to shut down the Chicago branch of the tech company her brother Clay (T.J. Miller) runs. To combat this, Clay, with his CTO Josh (Jason Bateman), tries to land one big client, Walter Davis (Courtney B. Vance), to save the day, the jobs, the spirit of the season, the world, etc… A real Christmas miracle is that Tracey (Olivia Munn) develops magical internet technology that connects to the power grid. While all of this is happening, there is one hell of an office party going on in the city. RTS straps on some cash and makes it a party to remember. Jeremy swings from strands of lights and does obscene things to laser printers. La-Mar finds out that Cronuts are a “bastard pastry.” Collin learns that God drives a Kia just like Mary (Kate McKinnon). Buckle up! There are MANY amazing cameos throughout this film. Jillian Bell and Randall Park are tying this season together! Happy Holidays!

The Night Before

Fri, 19 Dec 2025 07:00:08 +0000

Happy Holidays! We have exclusive tickets to the Nutcracker Ball for you and your loved ones. Just don’t let Miley Cyrus talk you into anything you don’t want to do. In 2001, Ethan Miller (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) loses his parents in a tragic car accident. Ever since, his two best friends, Isaac (Seth Rogan) and Chris (Anthony Mackie), celebrate the holidays so Ethan isn’t alone. Now, as the trio have grown and have more life obligations, they decide this is the last year for their traditions. And, they have tickets to the mythical Nutcracker Ball. On the surface, the rest of the night is a drink/drug-fueled series of shenanigans. At its core, the night is about rediscovering what real friendship is. Can Ethan figure things out with Diana (Lizzy Caplan)? Is Isaac ready to be a father? Can Chris find himself amongst his growing fame? RTS rolls around with Mr. Green (Michael Shannon) and healthily maintains within the “Christmas present.” Jeremy crucifies the “messiah.” Whoops! La-Mar starts Home Alone-ing people on the streets. Collin befriends all the statues at a nativity scene. Rami, after a church debacle, earns his wings. Be merry! Be safe, and have fun! Remember to appreciate the family you have made along the way.

Dollman

Fri, 12 Dec 2025 07:00:29 +0000

Brick Bardo (Tim Thomerson) is a tough cop living on some trash world of Arturos. After proving, yet again, how rad he is, he tells the mayor to shove it. Rules be damned! Crime doesn’t take a day off. Unfortunately, Bardo’s long-time and now disassembled baddie-rival, Sprug (Frank Collison), zaps them both to the Bronx on Earth. In comparison, Bardo is only thirteen inches in height to average Earth adults. Good thing he has his "Groger Blaster.” Once on Earth, Bardo meets and helps out Debi (Kamala Lopez). He realizes that her and her son are up against Braxton Red (Jackie Earle Haley) and his local neighborhood gang, and he shows everyone how they do it from Arturos. RTS smashes a floating space head upon sight. Most didn’t realize that was an option. Jeremy refuses to take his sunglasses off – even at night! “Tell me size doesn’t count.”

Young Sherlock Holmes

Fri, 05 Dec 2025 07:00:59 +0000

In a sort of what if, youthful versions of Sherlock Holmes (Nicholas Rowe) and John Watson (Alan Cox) meet at an English boarding school. After quick introductions, Holmes demonstrates his legendary sleuthing abilities (based on the writings of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle). We see a tender side of Holmes as well. Elizabeth (Sophie Ward) lives on the school grounds with her uncle. When the game is not afoot, Holmes is usually, flirtatiously, hanging with her. Unfortunately, the game is afoot! People are getting blow darted! There is a string of recent deaths that may be related. A cloaked Jawa is lurking around. There is an Egyptian cult! RTS takes on a stained-glass knight come to life. We’re all poker pals now. Jeremy checks out the Egyptian wrap and wax. It isn’t for him. La-Mar relies on “perception, intelligence, and imagination [and whiskey].” Collin fights some crazed cream puffs in a graveyard. “Life is infinitely stranger than anything which the mind of man could invent." Let’s solve a mystery together in this winter tale written by Chris Columbus.

The Brass Teapot

Fri, 28 Nov 2025 07:00:41 +0000

Combat Black Friday! You have all that you need. Learn from this couple. You don’t need excess when you have each other. Alice (Juno Temple) and John (Michael Angarano) are trying to improve their lives. Unfortunately, it seems no matter what they do, they’re more or less stuck. But, they do love each other. After Alice makes off with a teapot from an antique shop, she quickly learns that pain, in all forms, causes the teapot to spill out cash. John has lost his job. Arnie (Billy Magnussen) is demanding the rent. Payton (Alexis Bledel) is making everyone feel as if they are in high school. How far will this couple go to buy the lives they desire? Dr. Ling (Steve Park) cautions them against this. RTS joins a local fight club to fill that teapot. Jeremy rides the lightning! That’s a real cash generator! La-Mar cartwheels down a flight of steps. Collin does things with candle wax that will occupy your dreams for weeks to come. In the end, you don’t need to buy anything. Also, we are currently accepting your donations. <3

Tango & Cash

Wed, 26 Nov 2025 07:00:41 +0000

T-Grande! Let us lend you a helping hand this year. While you are prepping your heart out or chowing down all hog wild, let us share with you a very fantastical tale on this very special T-Grande episode. Everything is getting mashed, and there will be gravy! Tango (Sylvester Stallone) and Cash (Kurt Russell) are supposed to be the best in the LAPD. There are newspaper articles coming out every few moments indicating this. And, when these two get framed by Perret (Jack Pallance) and sent to prison, oh boy! There will most certainly be newspaper montages! These two are able to escape and then go on a series of adventures to clear their names, seek justice, get a souped-up RV and we all get to meet Kiki (Teri Hatcher), and we see why “they’re real and they’re spectacular.” RTS dresses by the rules but doesn’t play by them. Jeremy learns what can be achieved when you tape a hand grenade to someone’s mouth. La-Mar builds and displays an elaborate mouse maze. Thanks to everyone who suggested this film over the years. We are grateful for you! Enjoy some T-Grande trivia and our offtrack/on brand discussions of pies and all things seasonal.

The Boneyard

Fri, 21 Nov 2025 07:00:29 +0000

Kids these days! Out causing trouble! Always involved in some sort of mischief. Resurrecting into ghoul demons and trying to eat everyone around! Hey, don’t blame the kids. Blame the ancient curse. Jersey Callum (Ed Nelson) and his psychic partner with a case of the blues, Alley Oates (Deborah Rose), get caught up in this zombie madness. Can they get out? Shepard (Norman Fell) has a ponytail. Will that assist anyone? RTS casually walks out the front door and drives off. Those cursed demon children never see it coming. Jeremy takes on Miss Pooppinplatz (Phyllis Diller) after she eats some head goo. La-Mar explodes Floofsoms. Collin impales (via a forklift) all who stand in his way. If you get a psychic vision to hang out here, you just got bone-yarded.

Shadowzone

Fri, 14 Nov 2025 07:00:26 +0000

Some people claiming to be scientists (they could be) are experimenting with dreams and deep sleep. They do this in an underground facility (as you do), and they open a parallel dimension (also, as you do). Because a test subject dies (explodes all over the place), Captain Hickock (David Beecroft) is called in to investigate the work of Dr. Erhardt (Louise Fletcher) and Dr. Van Fleet (James Hong). Now, there is an alien from another world running amok. Really, a bunch of stupid stuff is going on. Miguel A. Núñez Jr. is here but not as Dee Jay from Street Fighter. A nude woman is on display! There is a monkey named Bingo! RTS thinks Hickock is Tommy, but they are different people, but it doesn’t really matter. One is “Ginger Beard” with a shotgun! Where is Mike in all of this? Jeremy appreciates how everyone talks as if they have molasses in their mouths. La-Mar feels one droplet of water fall on him and he goes bonks! Between all the slow, nonsensical tech talk, the goo pipes and non-verbal transitions, the length of the movie is felt. How the hell are we getting out of this GD Shadowzone?

Spies Like Us

Fri, 07 Nov 2025 07:00:43 +0000

Emmett Fitz-Hume (Chevy Chase) and Austin Milllbarge (Dan Aykroyd) have been promoted! Congratulations! They will serve as decoys while other CIA agents take down a Soviet nuclear missile launcher. But, not everything in this mission is adding up. Along the way, there will be parachute drops! A metal briefcase with handcuffs is used. There is a secret underground base! Will Sam Raimi let you in? There is mention of codebreaking. There’s a lot of spy stuff happening here! Mr. Ruby (Bruce Davidson) and Mr. Keyes (William Prince) are trying to mastermind it. Karen Boyer (Donna Dixon) “spent the last two and a half years of [her] life preparing for this penetration.” So, there’s that! RTS trains with Colonel Rhombus (Bernie Casey) to become woods ninjas. Jeremy becomes an extra within the Ace Tomato Company. La-Mar smashes the hell out of the SatScram terminal with a rock! Rami hangs with Frank Oz while scrutinizing test takers. B.B. King is here! “Doctor. Doctor. Doctor. Doctor…”

Fright Night

Fri, 31 Oct 2025 06:00:15 +0000

It’s that magical time of year for another SUPER HALLOWEEN SPOOKTACULAR episode! Happy Halloween from everyone at RTS! We have a very spooky trivia quiz as well. Charley Brewster (William Ragsdale) should be grateful for the life he is living. While in his bedroom, between mom-approved sex sessions with his girlfriend, Amy (Amanda Bearse), Charley spies on his new neighbor, Jerry Dandrige (Chris Sarandon). Turns out that ol’ Jerry is a vampire. Instead of being cool about it all, Charley calls the cops and starts a bunch of trouble. He also enlists the aid of a television horror host, Peter Vincent (Roddy McDowall), and his friend with some horror knowledge, Evil Ed (Stephen Geoffreys). Jerry is not thrilled with any of it. He is thrilled with Amy though. RTS does play it cool and now has wealthy, well-connected vampire friends. Jeremy befriends Billy (Jonathan Stark), and they oversee the estate together. La-Mar bewitches us all as he lays down some slick moves at the 80s nightclub. We all hope you’re having a good time. If not, the master might be upset. Have more treats than tricks – but, really, whatever you’re into.

Tucker and Dale vs Evil

Fri, 24 Oct 2025 14:20:43 +0000

Tucker (Alan Tudyk) and his best pal Dale (Tyler Labine) are starting their dream vacation. Tucker just spent his savings by purchasing a fixer-upper cabin in the woods. They want to spend their time fishing, relaxing and drinking some beers. There are stories and rumors of some sort of a woodsy massacre from years past, but that won’t stop these two from living their best lives. What will try to stop them is a bunch of Chad-bros led by Chad (Jesse Moss). They mistake the harmless duo as a pair of backwoods psychos! When Tucker and Dale save Allison (Katrina Bowden) from drowning, Chad and the crew take their paranoia to dangerous levels (for themselves). RTS performs a lovely chainsaw ballet amongst the trees. Jeremy learns how heavy half a guy really is. La-Mar successfully escapes a swarm of bees. Emily sensibly decides to stay at a hotel up the road. It includes a pool and a continental breakfast. Be mindful of the woodchipper!

Cat's Eye

Fri, 17 Oct 2025 06:00:17 +0000

Written by Stephen King, we have three creepy tales guided (sort of) by a cat’s experience and perspective. And, we have our first anthology to discuss on RTS. In our first tale, Dick Morrison (James Woods) is trying his best (maybe) to quit smoking through Quitters, Inc. Dr. Vinny Donatti (Alan King) assures Morrison that he has a 100% success rate, and there will be results or else. In tale two, we meet Johnny Norris (Robert Hays) who has fallen for Cressner’s (Kenneth McMillan) wife. Worst part, he’s a crime boss about to end Norris. Good thing is he bets on everything. If Norris can shimmy around the outer edge of an entire penthouse, riches and love await him. What’s the pigeon have to say about this? Our last story is about a cat! A cat fighting a troll and winning over Amanda’s (Drew Barrymore) affection. RTS feeds the neighborhood cats only the best tuna and goat. Jeremy becomes a plume of smoke at an 80s party. La-Mar successfully circumnavigates the ledge of the first floor. Collin shuts down the troll hole for good. The life of a cat isn’t all playful yarn games and frolicking, at least not this season.

The Babysitter

Fri, 10 Oct 2025 06:00:23 +0000

Cole (Judah Lewis) is a somewhat nerdy but good-natured boy who is turning into a young man. When Cole’s parents leave town for the weekend, he’s beyond excited to spend time with his mega-crush babysitter, Bee (Samara Weaving). Bee is the whole package for Cole. She’s funny, she’s pretty, and she can talk nerd culture with ease. When Cole stays up one night to see what the cool kids do, he is surprised to find out that Bee is dealing with the devil and her friends are crazy as hell killers. Cole, now being hunted down, runs, hides and gets assistance with his friend Melanie (Emily Alyn Lind). Blood and explosions ensue! RTS flips cars and burns demon books. Jeremy is insta-bewitched and spins a bottle. La-Mar shows the world the fat dragon! Collin dances himself out of the way of eggs and BMX bullies. Will we ever figure out why Max (Robbie Amell) is shirtless? Will this be your first question? Are you too old for a babysitter?

Teen Wolf

Fri, 03 Oct 2025 06:45:38 +0000

The struggle of a teen is real. This isn’t the story of a young republican banker to be or of a time traveler avoiding the affections of his mom. This is the howling tale of Scott Howard (Michael J. Fox). He wants to date the girl of his dreams, Pamela (Lorie Griffin), be a high school basketball star and just be popular and liked. Seems like average teen aspirations. He’s also surfing on vans with Stiles (Jerry Levine) and avoiding the affections of a much better local gal, Boof (Susan Ursitti). Wait, Scott is also a werewolf that can summon powers on command! Dad/Harold Howard (James Hampton) thought it could have skipped a generation. The town is super cool with it though. Just got to win some b-ball. RTS searches for Mike in this episode. His body is feeling the change. Jeremy sweats buckets upon buckets. Someone is going to have to clean this up. La-Mar avoids a card game with a guy who has the first name of a city, but he does go out with a lady with a dagger tattoo. Collin learns what really happens in the bleachers at the end of the game. You don’t need a full moon to have a good time here. It’s been inside you this entire time? That seems right. Go FULL WOLF!

Runaway

Fri, 26 Sep 2025 06:14:37 +0000

The mustachioed mythos of Jack Ramsay (Tom Selleck) is revealed and is in full force (full stalk) within this futuristic dream. Ram-Man does NOT like rogue robots. They really twiddle his stache. He also doesn’t like heights, and sometimes he becomes a real grump about it. Luckily, he’s partnered up with Karen Thompson (Cynthia Rhodes) to temper the crank. And, if Ramsay can’t grab a dinner with Jackie (Kirstie Alley), maybe it will work out with Thompson. Getting dinner seems like an integral plot point to this film. That and Dr. Luther (Gene Simmons) brandishing weapons and staring into your eyes like a madman. Well cast! Whatever! Machines are angry or something! Microchip! RTS fights off drones and tries future sushi. Jeremy dodges an array of heat-seeking smart bullets. La-Mar casually knocks around a horde of spider robots. Collin rides the corn-cutter bot to freedom. This future is bonks! And, in many ways, Michael Crichton, you predicted it well. Now, let’s talk dino DNA.

My Science Project

Fri, 19 Sep 2025 06:00:51 +0000

What do you have planned for your science project? Another show stopping volcano? Regrow some vegetable scraps? Solar powered something? How about submitting an unstable device that creates time warps? Let’s go with that! Michael Harlan (John Stockwell) has been told by ex-hippie turned professor, Bob (Dennis Hopper) that he needs to submit a science project or he will fail. Mike takes his friend/date Ellie (Danielle von Zerneck) to a military junkyard of wonders. Classic first date! They find a device that houses a glowing purple orb. Note: these are not sexual allusions. Once Mike and his friend Vince (Fisher Stevens) hook a car battery up to this alien device, time becomes unhinged. Is this project worth an A? What’s Cleopatra doing here? Get ready for Sherman (Raphael Sbarge) to quickly break away from nerdom. RTS outruns electricity! Jeremy makes sure you don’t forget about the school tax, jellyfish. La-Mar gets the device past the fuzzballs. Collin obliterates a dinosaur. History be damned! “In the ozone, blowzone,” make sure everything is “dyno-supreme.”

Encino Man

Fri, 12 Sep 2025 06:00:00 +0000

We received this super fun listener request. Thank you, Mike! In this tale of teenage heroism, viewers will learn the ways of fresh baby nugs and wheezing the juice and/or gigs. Dave Morgan (Sean Astin) is a grump with dreams of becoming the prom king, dating Robyn (Megan Ward) and hosting an epic end of year pool party. This party will be in the current backyard hole he is digging with his bestie, Stoney (Pauly Shore). During this pool-dig turned excavation, these lads find a human popsicle, Link (Brendan Fraser). After thawing him out and giving him a fly 90s look, it’s high school time! For Dave, this could be the path to popularity. Caveman shenanigans ensue. RTS makes their way through all the nugs and cones. Jeremy becomes infected with grooves and learns to “feed the monkey.” La-Mar gives a sincere and direct SHOOOOOOOSH to all the doubters of cave culture. Listen, bud-dy, give this a view and have a good time. “The cheese is old and moldy.”

Captain Ron

Fri, 05 Sep 2025 06:00:34 +0000

The Harvey family from Chicago have inherited a yacht that was once owned by Clark Gable, and they want to give their kids an out-of-city sailing experience that they will remember. Oh, they’re going to remember this! Martin/dad (Martin Short) thinks he can do it all. He cannot. Katherine/mom (Mary Kay Place) is good spirited and skeptical (rightfully so). Leading the family is the fantastical Captain Ron Ricco (Kurt Russell). He might be a bit scruffy, and don’t trust him in Monopoly, but he’ll eventually get the family where they need to be – physically and spiritually. The kids take part in this family adventure. Ben (Benjamin Salisbury) strives to become promoted from swab to mate. Caroline (Meadow Sisto) is engaged but “it’s kind of informal. Like, not a problem.” So, everyone has goals. RTS takes on the pirates of the Caribbean. Jeremy carves out some boat shower time and something to do with a salami. La-Mar learns the way of the revolutionary. Collin dives into the ocean and becomes sea-foam. He is reborn into an air spirit. Hit play on some Bob Marley, grab some rum and come sail away.

Moving Target

Fri, 29 Aug 2025 06:00:38 +0000

This is the legendary story of Toby Kellogg (Jason Bateman), a somewhat questionable musician with an equally questionable future in the music industry and how he handled the mob. Toby wants to hang out with his band and his new lady friend, Megan (Chynna Phillips). Unfortunately, Toby’s parents believe in him and send him to music camp in Interlochen for eight weeks. Halfway through, Toby sneaks out and flies back home. He discovers his parents left, the house is empty and no one probably loves him. Real pity party here. Meanwhile, a mob assassin, Tim (Jack Wagner), is out to get him, and Justice Department Dobbins (John Glover) is trying to save him. What does Tom Skerritt’s mustache think about all of this? RTS packs a radio and a handful of cassette tapes for this adventure. Jeremy helps himself to one of the many sports cars available to all teens in this film. Remember that one time at band camp? If it’s about terrible food and brown water, then, yes, we remember.

Re-Animator

Fri, 22 Aug 2025 06:00:52 +0000

Herbert West (Jeffrey Combs) is a strange, young medical student who will break as many pencils as it takes for you to understand that dead cells can come back. West moves in with another medical student, Dan Cain (Bruce Abbott), and he experiments with green glowing serums and Dan’s dead cat. Dan is dating Megan (Barbara Crampton), who thinks West is a major creep. During these scientific shenanigans, the two doctors-to-be turn Megan’s dad, Dean Halsey (Robert Sampson), into a re-animated ghoul. Whoopsie daisy! In the backdrop of all of this, Dr. Carl Hill (David Gale) loses his head and attempts to steal all of West’s work. Also, Dr. Hill is trying to get mad freaky with Megan! RTS looks into the void and sees Cthulhu, and it looks kind of adorable. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin go on a re-animating spree. Everything is coming back! Where’s the security guard for this? “Cat dead, details later.”

Dead End Drive-In

Fri, 15 Aug 2025 06:00:14 +0000

Kai James of the Australian band Girl and Girl joins us. As an Australian ambassador, he lets us know that this is ALL true. Maybe even based on a true story. In a somewhat near future, things have gone wrong! Australia, the U.S. and North Korea are all that’s left! That’s bizarre. When you’re not thinking of that, go see a film. Jimmy ‘Crabs’ Rossini (Ned Manning) wants that. Oh, and sex with Carmen (Natalie McCurry) in a car. Done and done! But, some cops steal two of his wheels while the pasties are in play. Turns out this drive-in is really a concentration camp for the youths. Thompson (Peter Whitford) is behind some of this. Well, he has a dated computer control panel and Foster’s. Lots of Foster’s. Those rounded up all seem cool with it. They also become a bunch of weird racists rather quickly. Jimmy just wants out! RTS escapes the Rocks Riot and now inquire about joggers selling their shoes. La-Mar is appalled by the snack selection but has been enjoying the films at the drive-in. Kai was going to become a carboy, but he is bewitched by the golden nipples of the future. Who wouldn’t be? Good thing we can still get some Fanta in this dystopia. Music by: Girl and Girl.

Mutant

Fri, 08 Aug 2025 06:00:26 +0000

This is a tale of love. Love and goo! Some of the crazy townsfolk love putting toxic waste into the ground. This just seems like a recipe for mutants! Unfortunately, two brothers, Josh (Wings Hauser) and Mike (Lee Montgomery), drive through town and get caught up in this mess. Josh does meet Holly (Jody Medford), and when she’s not bartending or teaching, she may or may not be down for some fun times. Meanwhile, when sheriff Will Stewart (Bo Hopkins) isn’t hitting the Wild Turkey, he’s trying to convince his superiors that there’s something amiss. RTS avoids the hand goo stigmata. Jeremy joins Holly for some after school tutoring. La-Mar tosses numerous Molotov cocktails into the faces of mutants. They are not fans of that! Collin sits down and gets to really know the mutants and what’s troubling them. After, he face-bombs them, too! If you’re in for a series of bad decisions, boiler room pipe fights and are ready to leap over a pool table during a barroom brawl, then let’s get mutated!

In The Mouth of Madness

Fri, 01 Aug 2025 06:00:17 +0000

John Carpenter directs this eerie tale. A publishing company hires John Trent (Sam Neill), an insurance investigator, to track down a missing author, Sutter Cane (Jürgen Prochnow). Cane’s books seem to drive certain readers to go crazy, but, hey, sales are through the roof! The head of the publishing company, Jackson Harglow (Charlton Heston), sends Linda Styles (Julie Carmen) along with John to the town of Hobb’s End which may or may not exist. Their goal is to find Cane and find out what is happening as the world seems to be falling apart/meshing into hell. Rest assured, there will be plenty of suspense and Lovecraftian horror along the way. RTS attempts to avoid reading Cane’s newest novel. They fail and now live in a demon world. Anyone have a black crayon? Jeremy now resides in an ever-changing nightmare painting. La-Mar rides a bicycle on the endless highway stretch of darkness. Are you just fiction in a story? You better check yourself because “he sees you.”

Joysticks

Fri, 25 Jul 2025 06:00:18 +0000

A bunch of townies playing video games with their joysticks. The metaphors do not run deep here. If you’re looking for a local scene where accruing points makes you royalty, where the vibe is provocative and the women love disrobing freely, then you just found your way to the local arcade, friend. Jefferson Bailey (Scott McGinnis) and his grandfather own and operate the town video-tech. When grandfather gets ill (or something, do we really know?), Jeff has to take on the resident busybody, Joseph Rutter (Joe Don Baker), and his idiot nephews. They want to Footloose the arcade youths! Meanwhile, Rutter’s daughter, Patsy (Corinne Bohrer), is in on the teen delinquency. Jeff will have to battle his on-screen girlfriend's father demon and take on King Vidiot (Jon Gries) to save the day! The arcade? The summer? What the hell is really going on here? Is Eugene (Leif Green) hooking up? Is McDorfus (Jim Greenleaf) going to have a heart attack? RTS loves after hour parties and secret sexy video games. La-Mar shatters records in Moon Patrol and dominates a few rounds of Gorf. Collin gets on a minibike and shows the crowd who the Pole Position champion really is. When you’re not taking off your shirt or having backroom circle-bed sex, just remember, “Totally awesome video games!”

Brewster's Millions

Fri, 18 Jul 2025 06:00:51 +0000

Montgomery Brewster (Richard Pryor) is a minor-league baseball player for the Hackensack Bulls who is approaching the end of his game. Luckily, his recently deceased great uncle, Rupert Horn (Hume Cronyn), left him a heap of cash. But, there’s a caveat and a lesson to be learned. Brewster must spend 30 million dollars in 30 days without gaining anything. If he depletes the funds (in accordance to the spending rules), he will gain his true inheritance of 300 million dollars. If he has anything left over, he loses it all. With the help of his friend Spike (John Candy), he is going to learn to spend hard – and hate every moment of it. Angela Drake (Lonette McKee) will keep track of all of the spending, and she will be giving heavy-handed, disapproving comments along the way. Learn to have some fun, Angela! Angela’s fella, Warren (Stephen Collins), is too busy leaving law to become an overpaid interior decorator. RTS always finds time to hang out with Edward Roundfield (Pat Hingle). He’s always one of the nicest people we see around these parts. Jeremy learns to bring the heat with the assistance of Charley (Jerry Orbach). La-Mar enters the collectable stamp game. Collin makes sure that you won’t vote for anyone. This is worth a watch as there is a rich, memorable cast that has, for the most part, passed away. We miss you all!

The Wizard

Mon, 14 Jul 2025 06:00:56 +0000

It’s our three-year anniversary! Thanks for listening! No one knows what to do or how to diagnose Jimmy (Luke Edwards), so the family puts him in a home. Corey (Fred Savage), his brother, decides to break him out and wander aimlessly into California. California! Along the way, they meet Haley (Jenny Lewis), and together they decide to level up Jimmy’s gaming skills and enter him into Video Game Armageddon to prove that Jimmy has mythical video game skills and the ability to win 50k! In the backdrop, dad/Sam (Beau Bridges) and his other son, Nick (Christian Slater), search for the kids while battling Putnam (Will Seltzer), a sleazy child bounty hunter. RTS gets to the sixth palace of Hyrule and past the river devil. The world learns why Corey is “so thick.” Jeremy learns why the Power Glove is “so bad.” La-Mar finds the scroll weapon and almost beats Mecha-Turtle. Collin waxes your tail in Double Dragon! Don’t get lost in Goblin Valley, and enjoy your adventures. Thank you for listening over these years, and use that flute! It opens a warp. Wink!

Johnny Mnemonic

Fri, 11 Jul 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Johnny, Johnny. Angry Johnny? Maybe not angry but goal oriented. Johnny (Keanu Reeves) has some crucial data stored all up inside his head, and he’s got to get it delivered or the Yakuza or synaptic seepage is going to kill him. Who hasn’t risked massive seepage in a dystopian future? The kicker is that Johnny is someone only concerned with himself, and now his dome contains the cure to save all of humanity. Spider (Henry Rollins) is helping in the good fight. Jane (Dina Meyer) is beating baddies down when she doesn’t have the shakes. An assassin preacher (Dolph Lundgren) looks like He-Man (again). J-Bone (Ice-T) is here! DAMNNN! RTS gets some sweet tech upgrades to their future bods courtesy of Takahashi (Takeshi Kitano). La-Mar and Collin check out the club with Ralfi (Udo Kier). They were never seen again. The world is not ready for Internet-2021!

Psycho Goreman

Fri, 04 Jul 2025 06:00:00 +0000

While playing a game of Crazy ball, siblings, Mimi (Nita-Josée Hanna) and Luke (Owen Myre), find a gem and resurrect an alien monster, Psycho Goreman (Matthew Ninaber/Steven Vlahos), that wants to destroy everything. In a way, these gruesome murders and destruction are an artform. Fortunately, Mimi is able to use this gem to control this being, and it is continuous party time after! Well, the creature, Psycho Goreman (PG), hates everything about it! A bunch of intergalactic baddies are coming to Earth! A child has been turned into a brain blob. An officer is a soulless ghoul. People are exploding! Blood is everywhere! Greg (Adam Brooks), the father, is breaking down hard, but he’s going to prove he isn’t lazy. Susan (Alexis Kara Hancey), the mother, awkwardly transforms into one of these creatures. Even though the world is in peril, Mimi is having fun. RTS joins PG’s rockin’ band. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin fight a blood box demon and learn that monsters can love. Is this film really about all the hunky boys out there? PG says he doesn’t care about those hunky boys, but does he? If you’re not having fun here, “frig off!”

Knock Off

Fri, 27 Jun 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Marcus Ray (Jean-Claude Van Damme) and Tommy Hendricks (Rob Schneider) are fashion designers. Should this summary even continue? You know you’re already in. Well, if that’s not enough, these gents get involved in a terrorist smuggling ring, and now, with the help of Karen Lee (Leia Rochon), they will find out who is behind all of these dastardly deeds. Will they figure it out before fashion week? Also, we have to get ready for the Hong Kong going back to Chinese rule party. Fireworks aplenty! It gets chilly at night. Good thing Harry (Paul Sorvino) has the appropriate evening windbreaker. RTS gets some dim sum and sets fashion trends by day/fight atop cargo containers at night. Please, pass the chili oil. Jeremy finds out about the nano bombs in his counterfeit jeans (trousers). La-Mar chats up detective Ling Ho (Carman Lee). Things seem to be working out. Collin takes a cue from Han (Michel Wong) to jump out of boats and away from grenades. It works well! Lots of attempted twists in this flick, but these fellas wouldn’t knock you off. Would they? Who’s the Jean genie here, Skinny (Glen Chin)?

European Vacation

Fri, 20 Jun 2025 06:00:00 +0000

The Griswolds are back! Through dumb luck, the family wins a European vacation on Pig in a Poke! Is Europe ready? Clark (Chevy Chase) continues to be his well-intended but overbearing self. Ellen (Beverly D’Angelo) makes a splash as she debuts in La Donna Nella Doccia. Audrey (Dana Hill) is homesick and misses her boyfriend, Jack (William Zabka). Rusty (Jason Lively) actually has many things that go right for him. Way to go, Rusty! Through all of the chaos the Griswolds cause along the way, the family also get wrapped up in a murder. RTS upgrades their fashion sense into something Euro-horrific. Jeremy checks out Big Ben and Parliament in an endless loop. La-Mar questions what the right side of the road is. Eric Idle be warned! Collin dominates a slap/fist brawl at the beer gardens. Chicago, represent! Also, Johnny Lawrence forever! Enjoy Gran Disparate Yankee en Europa, and remember that your French waiter hates you.

Kuffs

Fri, 13 Jun 2025 06:00:00 +0000

George Kuffs (Christian Slater) is all smiles and dance steps until he learns his girlfriend, Maya (Milla Jovovich), is pregnant. Like a sleazebag, he immediately leaves town, heads to San Francisco and meets up with his brother, Brad (Bruce Boxleitner), in an attempt to borrow money and to start a new life within the famous Brazilian gold rush. Brad wants more for George, but big thug Kane (Leon Rippy) takes Brad out. George now owns Brad’s patrol district (as you do), and baddies be warned. Or not! George isn’t really trained for anything. He also doesn’t really care about much. He is forced to partner up with Ted (Tony Goldwyn), and together they eventually do things, sort of, and the city rejoices, kind of. RTS checks out the chaos while taking Thunder for a walk. Thunder loves art! Jeremy and Collin put on some shower goggles and take the chief’s Corvette for a spin. What could go wrong? Let’s clean up the neighborhood Kuffs-style!

Pray for Death

Fri, 06 Jun 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Akira Saito (Sho Kosugi) is living a lovely life with his wife, Aiko (Donna Kei Benz), and their two young boys in Japan. Akira does have a secret. Is it that he’s awesome? Yes! One day, Aiko encourages Akira to move the family to the U.S. where she was born. They make the move. This does not go well – and quickly! Some local mob thugs have been storing their secret goods in a hidey hole adjacent to the Saito’s new residence. A cop on the take steals a necklace from the mob and an enforcer, Limehouse (James Booth), goes completely bananas in his own mind. Totally APE here! Limehouse proceeds to go on a series of odd adventures to harass and harm the Saito family. Akira is all, naw man! Then, he unleashes the full ninja – fancy head garb and all. RTS wonders if this was all real. Ninjas aren’t real, right? Wink! Collin takes the time to admire the stunning silk ninja-wear. Jeremy becomes a dock rat. It’s more appealing than one would think. La-Mar heads to Pier 25 for blowtorch games and loose necklace inquiries. Can we ever truly put our shadows behind ourselves?

The Further Adventures of Tennessee Buck

Fri, 30 May 2025 06:00:00 +0000

A rich jackass, Ken Manchester (Brant von Hoffman), and his snooty wife, Barbara Manchester (Kathy Shower), hire a somewhat known adventurer, “Tennessee” Buck Malone (David Keith), to guide them through the Borneo jungle to hunt for a tiger. What this group did not count on is ANYTHING! Everything starts off with some elephant rampage. This then moves onto tin can plane flights and a tribe of hungry cannibals. Be prepared for zany music and lots of monkeying around – all until this becomes ultra dark! RTS casually borrows Buck’s magical amulet and gets out quickly. What was everyone else waiting for? Jeremy and La-Mar successfully take on hordes of cannibals. Nothing takes them down faster than introducing sugar into their diets.

The Blob (1988)

Fri, 23 May 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Goooooooo! In this 1958 remake, some kind of pink craziness comes from space and is hungry. We don’t really know why it’s doing this or what this thing is, but it is growing, and it is everywhere! Meg (Shawnee Smith) is just trying to live her life without her boyfriend dissolving. GOO! Badboy, Brian (Kevin Dillon) isn’t having any luck jumping the gulch with his motorcycle. Mental GOO! Sheriff Herb Geller (Jeffrey DeMunn) has an 11:00 at night date with Fran (Candy Clark)! Can he get there? Mystery GOO! Oh, and Dr. Meddows (Joe Seneca) is going to put you in a van! You’re a van person now! Van GOO! RTS does not go around poking things with sticks/ does not mess around with cosmic stuff. Keep nature in nature! Jeremy and Hazel see everyone get dissolved and immediately leave town. Good luck town, you’re on your own! Anyone got a collapsible bazooka? As you watch, remember that “there’s always room for JELL-O.” It might have room for you, too!

Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins

Fri, 16 May 2025 06:00:00 +0000

After a scuffle over a sandwich at the docks, an officer “dies.” But, they RoboCop this fella good! He is now Remo Williams (Fred Ward). They shave his mustache and make him a shadow assassin within the government. Once he washes the hamburger and hot dog smell from his body, he learns from Chiun (Joel Grey) to complete a series of montage training sequences – including an awesome Statue of Liberty tough guys on scaffolding beatdown! In the background of all of this, some guy is doing stuff with faulty guns and shotty satellites. Seems problematic. Conn MacCleary (J.A. Preston) and Harold Smith (Wilford Brimley) don’t like that and make sure Williams stops him. Major Fleming (Kate Mulgrew) is agreeable along the way. RTS trains to breathe so they can fully live. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin learn that everything is just a feeling. So, master yours and run on the water that’s holding you back. We see the “feeble glint of promise” in your eyes.

Space Truckers

Fri, 09 May 2025 06:00:00 +0000

John Canyon (Dennis Hopper) has it all figured out. He’s going to make some decent cash and marry Cindy (Debi Mazar) by bringing her to Earth to see her mom. Mike Pucci (Stephen Dorff) joins this crew and adds some complications. Shouldn’t be a big deal though. They simply need to deliver a large shipment of sex dolls. Sex dolls? No! 5,000 deadly robots are on this cargo train! If this wasn’t enough, Nabel (Charles Dance) is emitting a “low-amp electrical wang pulse” all over the place. RTS does their best to navigate through black rock asteroids. Collin tries his first square hog. With the proper seasoning, he said it isn’t that bad. Jeremy and La-Mar watch Keller (George Wendt) get sucked out of a window. They both just stand and watch. The life of a space trucker is a storied one for sure. After this, you might need to rebuild your mind.

Eliminators

Fri, 02 May 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Ever since he was a little boy, Abbott Reeves (Roy Dotrice) has dreamed of time travel and conquering his own Roman empire. It’s every boy’s dream. But, is it really? Now, closer to his dreams than ever, he has to deal with an entire team of Eliminators souring his time-party. We have an out of program-control Mandroid (Patrick Reynolds), a scientist, Nora Hunter (Denise Crosby), with all sorts of ideas and a cool mini robot, a riverboat wildcard, Harry Fontana (Andrew Prine) and a freakin’ ninja, Kuji (Conan Lee). Having a ninja in your crew ALWAYS pays off! Once assembled, they will stop at nothing to dash the dreams of Reeves. RTS speedboats around and checks out the local scene – there isn’t much to report outside the constant explosions. Jeremy avoids becoming a stew for a lost neanderthal tribe, La-Mar desperately tries to explain all of this to Harry and Collin masters the art of hand cooking fish with Kuji. Out of all of the things one could do if time travelling, Reeves seems to have it in check. “That’s the power of love!”

The Quick and the Dead

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 07:00:00 +0000

The Quick Draw Competition is on! This is the only way to seek sanctioned justice, make a lot of cash and/or is a way to make a name for yourself. In this town, everyone’s got a story, and everyone’s got a reason. It’s all kind of a crappy town that nobody really wants to live in. Sam Raimi directs this gunslinger’s paradise. There is an entire cast worthy of checking out here. Ellen (Sharon Stone), Cort (Russell Crowe), Kid (Leonardo DiCaprio), Sgt. Cantrell (Keith David), Ace (Lance Henriksen), etc… make sure they’re all handy with the steel. Overseeing and dominating the competition is Herod (Gene Hackman), a villain with an interesting sense of rivalry and integrity. RTS rustles up a drink or two at the saloon. Ask for Horace (Pat Hingle). La-Mar and Collin bet on all the right brackets – they’re on a money train! All aboard! If you’ve got the grit, see this through.

Men at Work

Fri, 18 Apr 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Carl Taylor (Charlie Sheen) and James St. James (Emilio Estevez) are two sanitation workers who create as much of a mess as they are collecting. Due to their apathetic work ethics, they are now being observed by Louis Fedders (Keith David) to see if they can even do their jobs correctly. Through a series of events, one including Carl peeping on all of his neighbors through binoculars, the mayor is killed, shoved into an industrial barrel and is found on Carl and James’ route. Susan (Leslie Hope) was working for the mayor and now needs to be warned. Carl does just that as he starts to fall for her. A pizza delivery man (Dean Cameron) unwillingly joins this group, and everyone is set on taking down Maxwell Potterdam III (John Getz) and his environmental polluting ways. RTS acknowledges the sacredness of another man’s fries and would not dare to take them. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin check out a taser on the beach. When you recover from that, make sure to provide everyone with a proper golf clap.

Better Off Dead

Fri, 11 Apr 2025 06:00:00 +0000

It’s our 150^th episode! Thanks for listening! Paul acknowledges the unfortunate title and dedicates this episode to the life and birthday of his friend McKenzie. At the end of the episode, there is a song of theirs from many years ago. We hope you give it a listen. Lane Meyer (John Cusack) has been recently dumped by Beth (Amanda Wyss), his dad (David Ogden Stiers) demands he remedies the ‘tasty’ car that lays dominant in an “auto cocoon” in the front yard, his mom (Kim Darby) is boiling bacon until it turns blue, and he can’t make the ski team because Roy Stalin (Aaron Dozier) is giving him the high school bully treatment. Although Lane might feel hopeless and that life is meaningless at the moment, with a bit of encouragement and confidence he finds from Monique (Diane Franklin), Lane will realize “language lessons” are worth fighting for. RTS makes sure to pay their two dollars and eat some “fraunch bread.” Jeremy and La-Mar try "pure snow" with Charles De Mar (Curtis Armstrong). Then they try some “monster eggnog” that’s made with lighter fluid. Emily gets a coat made from real aardvark fur and a stack of TV dinners. Collin hits the K-12 to show us all how it's done! “He’s skiing on one ski!” Music by: Sigh, Growl. Happy Birthday, Kenz! XO

Street Fighter

Fri, 04 Apr 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Street fights to determine true fighting mastery! Traveling country to country to find the best of the best! Fireballs! You aren’t finding any of that here! Instead of what you are used to (and expecting), you get a story about Colonel Guile (Jean-Claude Van Damme) trying to save hostages, a reporter, Chun-Li (Ming-Na Wen), trying to break a story and petty criminals, Ken (Damian Chapa) and Ryu (Byron Mann), doing nonsensical things. Luckily, Cammy (Kylie Minogue) is cheery and willing to see this mission through. Together, they plan to take down the feared warlord M. Bison (Raul Julia) and his genetic testing and ridiculous Bison dollars. RTS harnesses their ki energy and Hadoken blasts all evil. Jeremy, La-Mar and Hazel admire Bison’s leisure attire and bone chandelier. Join us for Zangief’s realizations, wonky sets and Bison’s sad clown painting. Oh, Raul, you deserved better! Sonic Boom!

Old School

Fri, 28 Mar 2025 06:00:00 +0000

Mitch (Luke Wilson) has learned some interesting and startling news about his girlfriend Heidi (Juliette Lewis). Now, working his way through these revelations, he relocates and rents a house near a university. Mitch’s friends, Beanie (Vince Vaughn) and Frank (Will Ferrell), use this as an opportunity to make a party house to escape their adult lives. Snoop shows up! “Snoop-a-loop.” When Dean Pritchard tries to shut it all down, these three form a fraternity and do their best to keep the new pledges from being expelled, and they keep the good times going. RTS plans to go to Home Depot after the party. Maybe they’ll go to Bed, Bath, & Beyond. They don’t know if they’ll have enough time. La-Mar celebrates and honors Joseph “Blue” Pulaski (Patrick Cranshaw). “You’re my boy, Blue!” Jeremy takes a deep listen to The Dan Band. Collin astonishes us all with his ribbon performance. Hazel talks shop and all things tranquilizers with Peppers (Seann William Scott) on this meet cute. If things get too humorous in this fun flick, earmuffs!

Weird Science

Fri, 21 Mar 2025 06:00:00 +0000

John Hughes helms this fun 80s flick. We’ve got a couple of nerds, Gary (Anthony Michael Hall) and Wyatt (Ilan Mitchell-Smith), attending Shermer High School, and they just want to become popular. We know the story. But, did you think Frankenstein would inspire these two to “hack the planet” with their computer and create what they think is the perfect woman, Lisa (Kelly LeBrock)? Well, they do! The plan was simple. They want to shower with a woman, hit the city for drinks and some nightlife, and then they want to party. These two will get exactly what they want, but they are going to be shown some lessons along the way. Do they learn them? Probably not! Wyatt’s brother Chet (Bill Paxton) will try to enforce his own rules as well. RTS hangs out at the Kandy Bar and learns about the “family jewels.” La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy take on a Mad Max horde and make sure their party guests have a night to remember. When you are trying to recreate the “science” at home, make sure not to forget the doll. Also, make sure the water isn’t running all day while combing your hair.

30 Days of Night

Fri, 14 Mar 2025 06:00:00 +0000

In Alaska, amongst rolling snowstorms, the town of Barrow enters their month-long night. Only a fraction of the town stays to stick it out. Soon, a stranger (Ben Foster) arrives and creates havoc – especially with the town’s ability to communicate. If this wasn’t enough, a bunch of vampires in suits show up and just destroy everyone! Sheriff Eben Oleson (Josh Hartnett) and the fire marshal, Stella (Melissa George), round up a handful of survivors in an attempt to hide throughout the town to survive until the sun rises again. Also, Beau Brower (Mark Boone Junior) goes on a much-needed vampire kill-spree. RTS makes the best of this end of winter month of darkness by watching a film about a month of darkness. Very meta! Jeremy and Collin throw a bunch of these blood-sucking demons into a metal masher. La-Mar asks a nice vampire child for a bag of chips at the general store. He gets them! Sometimes, you just have to ask nicely. Nemo and Rami go the old-fashioned route and simply explode vampire heads. That is VERY effective! Eat your can of cherries and stay warm tonight. Nighty night. Don’t let the vampires bite.

Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe

Fri, 07 Mar 2025 07:00:00 +0000

Former governor of Minnesota and now a 10,000-year-old alien law enforcer, Abraxas (Jesse Ventura), is doing his “best” to apprehend Secundus (Sven-Ole Thorsen) because he’s running around Earth trying to impregnate women for a child to produce the Anti-Life Equation. It’s the path to immortality! After Secundus puts his hand on the first woman’s stomach he sees, we have a baby! 5 years later, after this child has grown a bit, these alien goons are back at it on Earth – lots of running through the woods. There are some useless officers with pointless backstories. Secundus orders breakfast. Sonia (Majorie Bransfield) develops feelings that no one cares about. RTS makes sure to disable their Answer Boxes because they want to party. La-Mar and Jeremy make sure no one will harm the Culmator. Our world depends on it. Or it doesn’t. Everything is unclear here. The only thing you might need to guard against is this film.

The Last Dragon

Fri, 28 Feb 2025 07:00:00 +0000

Leroy Green (Taimak) has been dumped by his martial arts master so he can unlock the next level in his training – the Glow. While trying to find his inner power, Laura (Vanity) tries to unlock other inner feelings he has as well. Good thing Leroy is hanging around because Vanity has multiple kidnap attempts from a corrupt music promoter. Meanwhile, Sho’nuff (Julius Carry) will stop at nothing for an epic confrontation and Converse kissing with Leroy. There will be Glow EVERYWHERE! Ah, yes, to be young in NYC in the 80s. This is exactly how it was! RTS masters eating popcorn with chopsticks. La-Mar, Collin and Lucor reminisce over the “King of Colfax” and groove to this awesome soundtrack. We just hope you “jack ‘em up, buddy!”

Star Knight

Fri, 21 Feb 2025 07:00:00 +0000

Cosmic fella who can’t breathe the same air as his love is in a real dilemma. This stellar tale of love is as old as the cosmos. Ix (Miguel Bosé) is not a starman, and he’s not waiting in the sky. He’s collecting the spirits of animals – as you do. When Princess Alba (Maria Lamor) goes swimming in the nude, Star Knight takes her into the “dragon.” Klever (Harvey Keitel) doesn’t like that! And, he wants to be knighted. With the aid of Fray Lupo (Fernando Rey), these two idiots will accomplish nothing along the way. If you can see anything in this film, you just passed an eye exam. RTS tells their doctor, Boetius (Klaus Kinski), that they need some kind of elixir of immortality. Jeremy falls in love with this entire film production. La-Mar takes on the Green Knight. Collin now communicates through a series of hums and beeps. We hope you see your seven spirits.

Blast from the Past

Fri, 14 Feb 2025 07:00:00 +0000

You are cordially invited to an epic Guy-entine’s Day. Fill your cups up with mimosas and grab a handful of chocolate hearts. We did! Adam (Brendon Fraser) has grown up in a fallout shelter. His parents, Calvin (Christopher Walken) and Helen (Sissy Spacek), hid there in what they thought was a nuclear blast. Now, 35 years later, the vault is open, and Adam is sent into the modern world above to gather supplies and information. Adam immediately falls for Eve (Alicia Silverstone), but will she be charmed by his chivalrous ways of the past? It’s a Rom-Com, so you can bet on it! RTS starts an ice-cream cult. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin bathe in cheap perfume and offer plush teddy bears and cardboard-aftertaste candies. Don’t get your heart broken. But, if it happens, we’ll help you put it back together. U R Sweet!

The Longest Yard (1974)

Fri, 07 Feb 2025 07:00:00 +0000

It’s time for an American sporting tradition as old as this tradition itself. Tradition activated! Super Bowl time! Get your favorite snacks and peeps together. We hope your favorite teams do the things you want them to do. No slobberknockers necessary. A disgraced football player, Paul Crewe (Burt Reynolds), spirals out of control and lands himself in prison. Once there, a delusional warden (Eddie Albert) forces Crewe to train a group of inmates to take on the guards led by Captain Knauer (Ed Lauter). The warden wants these inmates to feel the pain of the game and to obey his authority without question. The warden is a metaphor for everyone’s life! Stick it to the warden and live free! RTS lives mustache-shaved lifestyles and shines bright with the radness. Collin and Jeremy have deep conversations over toilet wine and prison cheese. These are bonds that cannot be broken - unlike human bones.

Snakes on a Plane

Fri, 31 Jan 2025 07:00:00 +0000

From the get-go, you need to know there was NO other option than putting a bunch of poisonous snakes on a plane, time releasing them and amping them up with some pheromones. Is Eddie Kim (Byron Lawson) the Joker? Neville Flynn (Samule L. Jackson) is doing his best to protect his key witness, Sean (Nathan Phillips), from these slithering, fanged horrors. Claire (Julianna Margulies) wants to survive her last day at work. The MVP is Troy (Kenan Thompson)! We have a feeling he’s going to get us to L.A. If you’re a passenger not playing games, eating snacks or becoming a member of the Mile High Club, take a nap – it will be your last. RTS just avoids getting on the plane altogether. They hang tight in the control tower with cool drinks in snake-free locations. La-Mar and Jeremy taze snakes and air-blast them out the windows. Sammy J has had it with these snakes and this plane – and something about someone’s mom.

Kung Fu Hustle

Fri, 24 Jan 2025 07:00:00 +0000

Happy Lunar New Year! It’s the year of the snake, and it’s time for reflection, growth and careful decision-making. Sing (Stephen Chow) experiences all of this. In 1940’s Shanghai, Sing and his friend Bone (Tze-Chung Lam) try and fail at grifting their way into a housing complex. They turn to the Axe Gang for assistance and recruitment, and they fail at that as well. The Axe Gang is also extremely unhappy with the powers that Landlord (Wah Yuen) and Landlady (Qiu Yuen) have because they are able to defend where they live. The gang then break an undefeated killer, The Beast (Siu-Lung Leung), out of an asylum to seek vengeance. Once Sing realizes what is right and when he stops robbing Fong (Shengyi Huang) and her ice-cream money, he is able to harness his chi and become the kung fu genius these citizens need. True ultimate power! RTS checks out the local cuisine. La-Mar takes flight and jumps off an eagle. Jeremy attempts to roundhouse his way out of a “class 3 kill storm.” Look inward and find what you need.

Fletch

Fri, 17 Jan 2025 07:00:00 +0000

Irwin “Fletch” Fletcher (Chevy Chase) is an undercover newspaper reporter investigating excess drug trafficking on the beach. The police and high-ranking officials might be involved. What’s going on in this city? While Fletch is sleuthing, Alan Stanwyk (Tim Matheson) offers him 50K to kill him. It’s an insurance thing! Through a series of amazing disguises, one-liners, stealth and a bit of luck, Fletch is going to do his best to put all of these pieces together and to get his story out on time. “Bit by bit. One way or another.” Also, he needs to borrow Gail’s (Dana Wheeler-Nicholson) towel because his car just hit a water buffalo. RTS shows you that it’s all done with ball bearings. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar saw a manure-spreader that jackknifed on the Santa Ana. God awful mess. You should see their shoes. Enjoy this film with “a Bloody Mary, a steak sandwich and a steak sandwich.”

Cabin Boy

Fri, 10 Jan 2025 07:00:00 +0000

When Hazel’s mom, Carolyne, requests Cabin Boy, you get on that! Nathanial Mayweather (Chris Elliot) is a snob and a real jerk. But, he is a fancy lad. After he boards the wrong boat, he is trapped amongst the crew (Ritch Brinkley, James Gammon, Brian Doyle-Murray and Brion James) who despise him. Nathanial desperately wants to get to Hawaii to meet up with his richy-rich father. Along the way, the crew pick up Trina (Melora Walters), and Nathanial is insta-smitten. With a little luck, this cabin boy will become a cabin man. RTS searches the seas for love and wigs. Hazel, Jeremy and Collin fight an ice monster and a giant. When you have a moment of downtime, sample some fish stick kitties.

Real Genius

Fri, 03 Jan 2025 07:00:00 +0000

It’s a new year! Let’s open it by celebrating the 40^th anniversary of Real Genius. You deserve it! Mitch Taylor (Gabriel Jarret) is a 15-year-old prodigy who has been accepted into a university to work on a freakin’ laser. He gets to work with legendary genius (and outlandish) Chris Knight (Val Kilmer) on this project. Mitch wants Chris to focus. Chris wants Mitch to loosen up. It’s like a pair of opposite lasers. That’s a thing, right? Meanwhile, some guy (Jon Gries) has been disappearing in their closet. Psssst. His name is Lazlo. Why were they designing this laser to begin with? HATHAWAY (William Atherton)! He must have a doctorate in being a scamp. He’s been taking military funding for his department and using it for his house renovations. RTS sled down dorm hallways made of ice. Collin and Jeremy swim through mounds of popcorn. “Pop pop!”

Last Action Hero

Fri, 27 Dec 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Do you have a golden ticket? Do you want to sing about it? Danny (Austin O’Brien) has been given a magical one. It was originally from Houdini. While watching a midnight screener of his favorite action star, Jack Slater (Arnold Schwarzenegger), Danny is transported into the film. Now, he serves as a comedic sidekick in a zany fantasy world based on Hollywood tropes. Benedict (Charles Dance) gets his hands on the ticket and uses it for strange and somewhat undefined purposes. All of this spills back into the real world while Jack learns bullets and punching things hurt. There might be other lessons, but that’s not what it’s all about. RTS get some valuable insight from Death (Ian McKellen). He makes a mean Old Fashioned. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar hang with Whiskers (Danny Devito) and get the end of the year party started. Let’s celebrate with this underrated flick everyone has been asking for. Cheers!

Die Hard 2

Tue, 24 Dec 2024 07:00:00 +0000

A bonus holiday episode! What!? Can’t keep a good holiday down! We’ll visit the past to talk in our present, and you can listen in our future. John McClane (Bruce Willis) is back! Back but in D.C. to see the in-laws for Christmas. And he’s now LAPD? But Dulles was actually filmed at the old Stapleton airport in Denver! Baddies are everywhere! Planes are running out of fuel. Reporters are trying to get the inside scoop. A reindeer is supposed to arrive! McClane is just trying to pick up his wife. Between the terrorist acts led by Colonel Stuart (William Sadler), secret soldier missions with Major Grant (John Amos) and shoddy police work with Carmine Lorenzo (Dennis Franz), McClane is going to have to adhere to all of these ghosts’ advice and warnings or he may never change. He also icicle-stabs a guy in the eye! RTS dance it up at Old Fezziwg’s. Jeremy and Collin make sure that there is enough prize turkey for all.“Yippie kayak other buckets.”

Gremlins

Fri, 20 Dec 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Happy holidays, everyone! It’s time for winter, and it’s time for another Joe Dante film. The year of Dante continues on! After daddy/the father (Hoyt Axton) sneaks off with a Mogwai from Chinatown, he gifts it to his son, Billy (Zach Galligan), just before Christmas. There are some rules that need to be followed for Gizmo (the Mogwai). Within a day, Billy amazingly disregards these rules, and now this once adorable cuddle fluff has multiplied into a horde of mischievous monsters running amuck within town. Somehow, Kate (Phoebe Cates) is forced to bartend these creatures. Kinda seems like a fun time. Meanwhile, Pete (Corey Feldman) and the rest of town try to defend themselves. RTS contemplates which gremlin can hang out on the podcast. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin throw gremlins into pools with reckless abandon. These creatures might replace the family dog! Have fun and avoid BRIGHT LIGHT! BRIGHT LIGHT!

Santa's Slay

Fri, 13 Dec 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Santa Claus is coming to town! Also, he hates you, children and all that is good. So, little known fact, Santa (Bill Goldberg) is actually the demon son of Satan and Ericka. After losing a bet to an angel, Santa has been forced to bear gifts and be jolly for a thousand years. Now, that timeline is up! Nicolas (Douglas Smith) is a young, hapless doof in the dating department, but somehow his hot-to-go work friend, Mary/”Mac”(Emilie de Ravin), is going to help him out. ‘Tis the season! As Mac helps Nicolas learn about giving, Grandpa (Robert Culp) will reveal his true past and help take down the red menace. Pastor Timmons (Dave Thomas) will be at Gold Diggers. RTS hang out in the bunker with hot chocolate and holiday cheer. Jeremy, La-Mar, Collin and Hazel Bazooka-blast some flying demon reindeer! Also, Collin wants to remind you that “Christmas can scare the Dickens out of you.”

Strange Brew

Fri, 06 Dec 2024 07:00:00 +0000

A gigantic thank you to our listener, Jim, for requesting this fizzy-comedic flick. Bob (Rick Moranis) and Doug McKenzie (Dave Thomas) somehow obtain jobs at the Elsinore Brewery. Between the free beer and beer-related tasks they are in charge of, these hosers just reached heaven. Unfortunately, Brewmeister Smith (Max von Sydow) is planning to brainwash everyone with his mind-controlling beer serum. It’s time for global domination! Pam (Lynne Griffin) is trying to take over for her dad – her ghost dad? With a little help from Jean LaRose (Angus MacInnes) and a bit of buffoonery from Claude (Paul Dooley), beer might be had! Wait, is that the goal? We’ll figure it out along the way. RTS hangs out with Ted (Brian McConnachie) and plays some gloomy keyboard sequences. La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy are going to have to drink their way out of this mess. Don’t be a knob and join us as we take on some sudsy villainy!

Son in Law

Thu, 28 Nov 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Visit the Shore[s] this Thanksgiving! We hope you all had/are having wonderful holidays! Did you “chow down and munch on some grindage”? Too much food? Too much family? Too much indulgence? Wash it all down with another pie or two. We’ve got a holiday tale to get to. Rebecca Warner (Carla Gugino) leaves her small town in South Dakota for UCLA. School is going well, but, socially, she is having a hard time adjusting. Rebecca befriends strange and erratic Crawl (Pauly Shore), and she decides to invite him home for Thanksgiving break. The Warner family might not be ready for this level of, uh, energy. Hell, the entire town might not be ready. Dad (Lane Smith) is having the hardest time. But, that’s the Shore magic! He brings everyone together. There’s magic and Tracy (Tiffani Thiessen) dancing! Town miracle! RTS avoid getting weezed and look for fresh nugs. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar test out their Steven Tyler pajamas. Don’t let it tweak your melon!

Shoot 'Em Up

Fri, 22 Nov 2024 07:00:00 +0000

A huge thank you to our listener, Jake, for requesting this Gun-Fu epic! Mr. Smith (Clive Owen) doesn’t like that some randos are trying to put a baby mama in the corner – and then the baby in a corner too! Nope! Gun mode level 12! These goons didn’t know Smith is a gun-god! Most of these thugs go down quickly, but these bosses don’t like Smith interfering. Smith, with concerns for the child, seeks the aid of Donna (Monica Bellucci) to keep this newborn safe. While sleuthing together, a bit of a mystery is unraveled. Also, there is a sex shoot-out! Behind the scenes, Hertz (Paul Giamatti) has some other plans going on. RTS join Death (Julian Richings) while driving everyone around. La-Mar makes sure to Home Alone warehouses while taking down hordes of crumb bums for hire. Make sure to grab a bunch of carrots to pregame for this nonstop bullet bonanza!

The Perfect Weapon

Fri, 15 Nov 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Our friend Reg (Cubicle Comrades podcast) requested and joins us for his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut, and you’ll see his distraction knife. Then, it’s too late! Jeff Sanders (Jeff Speakman) has a lot of anger and a lot of flashbacks stored inside himself. So many flashbacks! Snap! “It’s getting’ kinda hectic.” Through his training in Kenpo, he tries to temper all of this. Master Lo (Seth Sakai) sends him on a lifelong quest to become a man. When the Korean mafia kills his friend Kim (Mako), the rage bubbles over. Through the guidance of Yung (James Hong), Jeff tries to seek vengeance. But, is this the way? Jimmy (Dante Basco) is there for the assist! Bangarang! Professor Toru Tanaka is going to try to slowly get you! Oh, and Mariska Hargitay is in this film! RTS make sure to combine the Kenpo sticks, especially at the Croc-Pit Club. You have to! La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin will show you the way of the dragon, but will you see it? Whatever your answer, that’s so tiger of you!

Over The Top

Fri, 08 Nov 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Thank you to our listener, Hillary, for requesting this film that is ripe with the top. Many have taken this as a tutorial on being a power top. Lincoln Hawk (Sylvester Stallone) has been gone, but now he’s back! He’s got the green light from his hospitalized wife, Christina (Susan Blakely), that he can reconnect with his son, Michael (David Mendenhall). Time for an epic father and son road trip! Homies for life! And, Linc shows Mike the ways of the road and the strong arm – truck apparatus and all. You know who doesn’t like any of this? Granpaps! Jason Cutler (Robert Loggia) is going to attempt to shut down the fun all along the way. Only an arm-wrestling competition with major prizes will settle this score. Watch out for Bull (Rick Zumwalt)! Someone is going to have to get the strap. RTS glisten with the best of them. Jeremy swallows a lit cigar and tries to own you. Hazel makes her Rabbit Troop Sucks debut by drinking some motor oil and breaking some wrists. One way or another, get in on this big rig of an adventure!

Iron Eagle

Fri, 01 Nov 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Thank you to our listener, Ryan, for requesting this high-flying amazingness. Doug (Jason Gedrick) dreams of being a fighter pilot just like his father. His father (Tim Thomerson) is shot down and captured, and it seems that the U.S. government isn’t moving quickly enough to rescue him. Now, he’s got three days to live, and Doug will gain the Obi Wan wisdom of Chappy (Louis Gossett Jr.). With the aid of all of Doug’s friends, some light hacking, moving some F-16s and rockets around, they forge a friendship and a rescue plan that just might work. Also, all of this is extremely illegal and seems unlikely. But, hell, it’s time to fly like an eagle. An iron eagle! RTS strap reel-to-reel tape decks to their legs, and they let the rock flow. La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy hot dog every-which-way. When are they not hot doggin’ around? “This one’s for you, Chappy.”

The Frighteners

Wed, 30 Oct 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Welcome back to another SUPER HALLOWEEN SPOOKTACULAR episode! Happy Halloween from RTS! Frank Bannister (Michael J. Fox), after an accident, has the ability to communicate with the deceased. Of course, using these powers to scare up some profits is going to be the first order of business. Lucy (Trini Alvarado) just lost her husband and is open to Frank’s ghost-vibe. Things seem to go well, but now, a death-like apparition is killing the people of Fairwater. It’s truly heart crushing. Agent Milton Dammers (Jeffrey Combs) has his own theories about these mysterious deaths, and he has a lead plated vest. Frank, his ghost pals and his offroad driving might be the way to put a stop to it. RTS need an out-of-body experience right now. La-Mar, Jeremy, Collin and Rami all make sure they’re not another number in the kill spree. Get ready for some spooky film trivia. “What about the guy in the toilet? What did he do to you?”

Silver Bullet

Fri, 25 Oct 2024 06:00:00 +0000

“I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand.” What we are dealing with here is not hunger. People are in danger. You know this small town is not going to let a bunch of violent murders go on. Who is doing this? Human? Animal? Everyone is upset and taking it in their own hands. In the middle of the night, after sneaking out, Marty (Corey Haim) witnesses the truth. This is a monster! Luckily, he escapes, but only barely, after this encounter. With the aid of his sister, Jane (Megan Follows), Marty desperately tries to convince Uncle Red (Gary Busey) of what has been really happening in town. Uncle Red, beyond his better judgement, agrees to assist the duo with their supernatural conspiracies. We’re glad he did. RTS avoids the rolling fog marsh lands during the full moon. Collin, La-Mar and Jeremy meet “a sort of wizard in weapons.” Get this Stephen King work on your list! “I saw a werewolf drinking a pina colada at Trader Vic's. His hair was perfect.”

Death Spa

Fri, 18 Oct 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Everything is very la-di-da – at the death spa. Worry not, if you become cut up or even haunted, you’ll get a few months for free. Michael Evens (William Bumiller) can make all of your dreams come true. Well, your gym dreams. His wife Catherine (Shari Shattuck) died a year ago. He thinks that’s a bummer, but with the comfort of Laura (Brenda Bakke), he’s been doing okay. And, in the gym business in the 80s, things moved fast! Now we have some kind of phantasm going all Scobby-kill-you-do where people want to work out. Or party. Or touch. Twin-sibling of Catherine, David (Merritt Butrick), was at home hacking. It’s all cool. PS: GHOST! RTS take in a nice ethereal soak after their extreme workouts. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar grab some juice mixers and enjoy the party. Too bad the roof is now really on fire! Is this gym membership worth your soul? Probably!

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Fri, 11 Oct 2024 06:00:00 +0000

We thank our listener, Jenna, and their fine request for this film. We all had a lot of fun watching this. Buffy (Kristy Swanson) has been chosen! She has some powers and some past lives, and now it’s time to send these fanged-sob’s right back into the ground! But, she’ll do it while ninja-kicking, heart-stabbing and accessorizing. Everyone wants some of Buffy’s time! Teen drama alert! Pike (Luke Perry) wants some special time. Awww! Lothos (Rutger Hauer) wants bitey-kill time! Merrick (Donald Sutherland) is trying to make up for lost training time. And, Amilyn (Paul Reubens) gets some staby time. There is very little time for cheerleading practice because of this. RTS are likely to accept invitations to graveyards from strangers. Where and when? Collin and La-Mar try not to get “thrashed” and split a hot dog. Cover your necks and be careful who you invite inside – especially if they’re floating. Fulfill your destiny!

Halloween III: Season of the Witch

Fri, 04 Oct 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Welcome to October fun month! No Michael Myers here. Beloved company Silver Shamrock just wants to celebrate Halloween by making the world’s coolest masks. Dr. Daniel Challis/”Dr. Bang” (Tom Atkins) can’t let being a tomcat in the city be enough. So, he takes his dead patient’s daughter, Ellie (Stacey Nelkin), to explore where these masks are coming from. Yes, there are dudes ripping faces off and then dousing themselves in gasoline and exploding themselves. People may or may not have smuggled Stonehenge here. Conal Cochran (Dan O’Herlihy) won’t reveal his tricks but will walk you through everything. And Ellie, She’s old enough for the Doc. “I'm older than I look.” “What's that?” “Who cares?” In the end, a company just wants Halloween to be fun for you and your family. RTS are going to laser button everyone in town! Face melt! Rami, Jeremy and La-Mar sip on the “champagne of beers” while making bad decisions and inappropriate payphone calls. Make sure to investigate your demon microchip masks and get ready for a road trip to “The factory” in Santa Mira.

The Ice Pirates

Fri, 27 Sep 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Attempting to do a line of ice. You’re watching Miami Vice! Doing this thing again, being nice. Failed once. I’ll try it twice. Jason (Robert Urich) and Roscoe (Michael D. Roberts) know exactly how it is. You have to hustle – and maybe do questionable things. Space questionable! They have an entire crew. It includes Maida (Angelica Huston), what!? Zeno (Ron Perlman) whips up some alien Thanksgiving fun! Even Killjoy (John Matuszak), “Sloth Loves Chunk,” comes along for the ride. The “ride” is to get some ice. Water is the currency of the day. Sorry, future currency/future day! Princess Karina (Mary Crosby) just wants to see dad. RTS jump time back and forth. The future is crazy! Have we ever been in the now? La-Mar and Jeremy order a few cold ones at the Pirate’s Den. Make sure your belts aren’t stiff and buckle up for this space adventure.

Explorers

Fri, 20 Sep 2024 06:00:00 +0000

It’s a new season, and it’s time for another Joe Dante film. The year of Dante continues! Also, fall is among us! Hoodies! Warm drinks! Jovial spookiness! Yes! Ben Crandall (Ethan Hawke) has been having some interesting dreams as of late. You know, dreams. He details out what he has seen within these tech-heavy visions and shares it with his friend (and all-round man of science), Wolfgang (River Phoenix). Both boys befriend Darren (Jason Presson) and, together, the three craft a spaceship based on dream science and coding being transmitted to them from beyond the stars. Also, Lori (Amanda Swenson) makes some random appearances. What does it all lead to? The only way to solve this interstellar mystery is to explore. RTS reminisces about 80s technology and why you should NOT jump out at kids in the night. La-Mar helicopters around while determined to figure it all out, but he’ll probably be at the drive-in most of the time. There’s a Starkiller flick to see! Robert Picardo, you’re brilliant! Lately, “you know I’ve been having these weird….” “Dreams?”

Waterworld

Fri, 13 Sep 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Merman wants to go with the wind. Merman wants adventure. Merman needs friends? In the future, the world has become, sigh, a water world. Mariner (Kevin Coster) loves yacht rock and boating. When he’s not exploring the ocean’s depths, he dabbles in herbology. He’s just minding his own business when everyone gets into a liquid fuss. Helen’s (Jeanne Tripplehorn) daughter has a tattoo map on her back, and it leads to dry land. Land seems cool. Deacon (Dennis Hopper) and his gang-o-dudes (Smokers) want that map because dry land promises have been made. Needless to say, this does not go well for Mariner’s rad future boat. RTS explores underwater mysteries and fights off sea monsters. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar make sure to take down a few hordes of Smokers and enjoy a lime or two. It gets strange on the open ocean. Real strange! Take a ride in an upgradable aircraft and decide if this water adventure is for you. Adieu, summer!

Tremors

Fri, 06 Sep 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Val (Kevin Bacon) and Earl (Fred Ward) are tired of their extremely small town, but they just can’t seem to get out. It’s like a Tom Petty song – almost! A few dead bodies bring them back. The road is blocked and that brings them back. A seismologist, Rhonda (Finn Carter), brings them back. And, of course, the subterranean tremor monsters are bringing them back. Town just isn’t safe. They do have fire power though. That’s thanks to Burt (Michael Gross) and Heather (Reba McEntire). It’s time to teach these creatures a lesson when you’re not pole vaulting over them. RTS takes some souvenir photos at Walter’s (Victor Wong) store. Collin, Jeremy and La-Mar feel the “trem” from the beginning. They’re still feeling it now. They have a bad case of the “trem,” and that’s a testament to the fun of the film. Inquiries on cannon fuses are accepted.

Summer Rental

Fri, 30 Aug 2024 06:00:00 +0000

An overworked, burnt-out air-traffic controller, Jack Chester (John Candy) is put on a mandatory summer break. He decides to take his family to Florida for some much-needed rest and relaxation. Things seem positive at first, but as each day passes, things steadily get worse. After a minor boating accident, Jack befriends Scully (Rip Torn) and improves his sailing ability and his self-confidence. When Al Pellet (Richard Crenna) threatens to take the remainder of the Chester’s vacation away, you better bet that this will be settled at the regatta. RTS embraces a four-week beach vacation. Collin and La-Mar use their astute powers of observation to make sure everything looks good and real. They feel real! Don’t be a squid stick and go have some fun with this film. Enjoy it with Scully’s catch of the day.

Chopping Mall

Fri, 23 Aug 2024 06:00:00 +0000

The 80s! What a time to be alive! Technological innovations were regularly being introduced to the public. This includes some sweet kill-bots. We mean security bots. It’s cool! Don’t worry about it. What better place to showcase these than a mall run by sex-crazed teens who can do anything they want? It’s a recipe for fun! When a lightning storm strikes, it converts these adorable droids into cranky death machines. Your security badge isn’t going to help you now. Ferdy Meisel (Tony O’Dell) just met someone special, Allison Parks (Kelli Maroney), and he’s OG Cobra Kai, so he strikes first. Mike (John Terlesky), who is also Deathstalker, sets up a furniture store sex party. It’s all strange. The robots are now on the loose! These metal fuzzies are going to laser beam your heart strings. Beep! Beep! Boop! RTS wanders the mall barefoot at night and contemplates life. La-Mar marvels at the mall’s wood paneling and plush red carpets. Emilio makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut after taking care of some of this robo-trash. See ya at the food court. We do hope you all “have a nice day.”

Lucky Number Slevin

Fri, 16 Aug 2024 06:00:00 +0000

We received this fantastic listener request. Thank you, Trisha! Mistaken identity lands Slevin (Josh Hartnett) in a world of problems. The day was already off to a bad start. Fired! Nowhere to live! Cheated on! Mugged! Meanwhile, crime bosses The Boss (Morgan Freeman) and The Rabbi (Ben Kingsley) have serious beef with each other. Slevin is in the middle of it all because they think he’s someone named Nick. This fella is having a rough go at this thing called life. Luckily, Lindsey (Lucy Liu) is able to shed some light on this mystery and swim into everyone’s heart. You have a heart, right? And when you aren’t a participant in the “Kansas City Shuffle,” you’ll have Mr. Goodkat (Bruce Willis) slipping in and out of the shadows. RTS learns the kinder art of revenge. Collin and Jeremy play both sides and then play them again. Someone is going to be betting on some ponies. Is it Stanley Tucci? The Tucc!

Moving

Fri, 09 Aug 2024 06:00:00 +0000

No one is a fan of a big move, but, after being laid off, Arlo Pear (Richard Pryor) has a chance to make one to Boise and better the lives of his family. His wife, Monica (Beverly Todd), is on board. His twin sons are too. Even his crazed neighbor, Frank (Randy Quaid), wants the move to happen. Unfortunately, his daughter, Casey (Stacey Dash), is not happy about it. Also, there is a fake job/set up by Gary (Dave Thomas) in the works. The movers are from hell. The new house was gutted. His prized car is mutilated by Brad Williams (Dana Carvey). Arlo has had enough of it all! RTS apply some warpaint and settle some scores. Jeremy, La-Mar and Rami drive the streets in their Mad Max battle vehicles and hunt down some movers. We can all agree, no one wants to find out how it’s hanging.

Zombeavers

Fri, 02 Aug 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Sometimes girls just want to have fun, and Mary (Rachel Melvin), Zoe (Cortney Palm) and Jenn (Lexi Atkins) are heading towards a weekend of fun. This trip turns sour fast. First, team No Boys Allowed, Sam (Hutch Dano), Tommy (Jake Weary) and Buck (Peer Gilroy), show up. Then, a foot is chomped off. Leave it to these zombie beavers as they knock down trees and make tunnels. Smyth (Rex Linn) is eating chicken and talking nonsense. RTS wade through the pond and rock with those blue-eyed demon beavers. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar, with the help of Bill Burr and John Mayer, turn this cabin slumber party into an epic weekend to remember forever. Disclaimer: there are radioactive zombie beavers that want to gnaw all of your faces off, but in an angry adorable sort of way.

Raw Force

Fri, 26 Jul 2024 06:00:00 +0000

This movie is a love letter to those truly looking for meaning in the artistic world of film. A bunch of martial arts party boys board an anything goes fun-time boat to achieve maximum enjoyment. Mike (Geoffrey O’Malley) and John (John Dresden) are amongst them. They want jolly fun-fun and to check out Warrior Island for some reason. The brochure clearly indicates that this place is haunted AF! Unfortunately, on top of the disgraced zombie hauntings, a nazi wannnabe, Thomas (Ralph Lombardi) is kill-focused for that jade action! Cookie (Jillian Kesner) deserves better than all these clowns! RTS try to get in on that jade trade for cash program. Collin, Jeremy and La-Mar inquire on how thick that jade is. There is a lot going on! When you aren’t being eaten by demonic monks or stalked by the supernatural, you might get gobbled up by the piranhas! No one signed up for this kind of booze cruise. But, Warrior Island does seem kind of cool.

Heavyweights

Fri, 19 Jul 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Camp was supposed to be fun! Camp was going to be a good time. Gerry (Aaron Schwartz) learns that he is going to Camp Hope, a camp for boys to lose weight for the summer. Luckily, the camp is overseen by the fun and caring Pat Finley (Tom McGowan) and is filled with amazing guys, including many members of The Mighty Ducks – Roy (Kenan Thompson) is among them. At camp, we also have Tim (Paul Feig) who is a cool camp counselor and first year camp nurse, Julie (Leah Lail). The fun ends when Tony Perkis (Ben Stiller) and his workout lackies buy out the place and try to create an infomercial for Tony’s hellish workout program. Someone call Tony’s dad! RTS avoid 20-mile “cleanse” hikes and make sure they’re “packin’” bullet-Pez candy. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin bounce from The Blob and enjoy the lakeside. Make sure to keep your friends close this summer, and don’t be like Lars (Tom Hodges), “farrrr away.”

Clue

Fri, 12 Jul 2024 06:00:00 +0000

It’s our two-year anniversary! Thanks for listening, and make sure to check out this phenomenal film! This is possibly the most fun you’ll have with a whodunit. The cast is brilliant! It includes Mrs. Peacock (Eileen Brennan), Wadsworth (Tim Curry), Mrs. White (Madeline Kahn), Professor Plum (Christopher Lloyd), Mr. Green (Michael McKean), Colonel Mustard (Martin Mull) and Miss Scarlet (Lesley Ann Warren). Guests are invited for dinner in a mansion on a rainy night in New England, 1954. As each guest arrives, a mystery is revealed, and Mr. Boddy (Lee Ving) is dead! Classic! RTS hideout in the study with a bottle of brandy. La-Mar finds a secret passage in the library, Collin grabs a bowl of soup in the kitchen before calling the FBI and Jeremy sells us out for a moment with Yvette (Colleen Camp). We’ll get to the bottom of it. Any way you end it (and there are multiple endings), you are going to be in for a treat. Thanks again for tuning in!

No Holds Barred

Fri, 05 Jul 2024 06:00:00 +0000

It’s time to go full Hulk during this 4^th weekend! Rip (Hulk Hogan) is a complex man doing charitable things when he’s not being the Wrestling Federation champion. Brell (Kurt Fuller) wants to own the best but can’t have Rip. He does not like that one bit, so he starts “The Battle of the Tough Guys” and makes sure Zeus (Tom Lister Jr.) gets Rip in the ring for the event of a lifetime. It’s all about those ratings! Hasn’t it always been? Samantha (Joan Severance) does some stuff and then doesn’t. That doesn’t seem to matter all too much. Randy (Mark Pellegrino) causes an incident because he hasn’t gained his supernatural powers. You’ll see the Hulkster on a motorcycle! In a wrestling tuxedo! And, you’ll see him in attire your imagination cannot comprehend. “A future ballerina pirate.” You’ll see it all! RTS explode! There were too many growls and too much lace. Explode! La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin make sure to keep their cool. It’s what the kids needed! Enjoy your July 4^th weekend, and keep it classy in the ring, brother!

Batman

Fri, 28 Jun 2024 06:00:00 +0000

This Tim Burton directed take on Batman is a must see. You’ll be treated to an epic score by Danny Elfman! There are many fun Prince songs as well. Bruce Wayne (Michael Keaton), who is Batman by night, just wants the city of Gotham to be chill. But, that just can’t happen! After Jack Napier (Jack Nicholson) becomes the Joker and runs the crime world, things get dangerously chaotic. Vicki Vale (Kim Basinger) is trying to get a photo of Batman but is getting distracted by her romantic feelings for Wayne. The Joker also wants Vale’s affections! So many secrets and so much drama! Just don’t forget that Bob (Tracy Walter) is your “number one guy.” RTS explore the Batcave and “love that Joker!” La-Mar and Collin check out the art scene and insist you “never rub another man’s rhubarb.” Davin loads up his utility belt and makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut to clean up Gotham. Make time to check out this trailblazing Batman film. Join us for this extended, batty episode where we discuss all things Batman at the same Bat-time on the same Bat-channel. And, “if you gotta go, go with a smile!”

The Burbs

Fri, 21 Jun 2024 06:00:00 +0000

We are back with more fun from director Joe Dante. Ray Peterson (Tom Hanks) has earned his relaxing summer week off. That’s going to be difficult when strange new neighbors move in amongst a cul-de-sac of gossip and snooping. Carol Peterson (Carrie Fisher) just wants to take the family to the lake. When Princess Leia asks, you go! Unfortunately, Mark Rumsfield (Bruce Dern) and Art Weingartner (Rick Ducommun) have some persuasively strong concerns about the new neighbors. Bonnie Rumsfield (Wendy Schaal) assists in unraveling the mystery of the Klopeks and avoids tan lines. RTS might begin occasionally chanting. Who’s going to kill who? Who is good? Who is our pal? La-Mar and Collin play with some wallpaper and try some lovely sardines. Later, we will all be at Ricky Butler’s (Corey Feldman) awesome party. Pizza is coming! We hope you don’t reach a 9 on the tension scale. Stick with us, Pinocchio! Be warned: these suburbanites are not taking any guff!

Cloak & Dagger

Fri, 14 Jun 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Happy Father’s Day! We hope your weekend includes tasty food, sleuthing and loading up your classified cartridges (tapes). Young Davey Osborne (Henry Thomas) has a wild imagination, and he has an imaginary friend, Jack Flack (Dabney Coleman), who is also the image of his father, Hal (also Dabney). While playing a spy game around town, Davey witnesses a murder and is handed a top-secret cartridge. He and his friend Kim (Christina Nigra) then get caught up in a bonkers situation that only their spy games have prepared them for. Maybe! Their computer friend Morris (William Forsythe) confirms their video game contains government secrets. Now, a bunch of over-eager, wall-breaking goons are after them! Luckily, sweet Eunice (Jeanette Nolan) and George (John McIntire) are able to assist Davey in his mission. Something might not be right though. Trust your instincts! RTS sneaks within the shadows and perfects the “Crossfire Gambit.” La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy learn when to roll the dice and when to get off the boat. There will be a lot of running. Cloaking? Yes! Daggering? You bet! You’ll also discover who the needed father is. We miss you Dabney! We look forward to watching many more of your films.

Hot Rod

Fri, 07 Jun 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Summon your spirit animals and let’s go stunting! Rod Kimble (Andy Samberg) wants to follow in his father’s stuntman footsteps. He has assembled an entire crew! His half-brother Kevin (Jorma Taccone) is the team manager and works on filming. Dave (Bill Hader) is the mechanic when he’s not working at the skating rink. Rico (Danny McBride) builds the ramps and has access to looted goods. And, Denise (Isla Fisher) has recently joined and is there for Taichi training and crushing on. Rod’s stepfather, Frank (Ian McShane) needs a heart transplant but doesn’t have the funds. Only Barry Pasternack (Chris Parnell) and the power of AM radio can help Rod raise the needed money! RTS have been drinking green tea all GD day! La-Mar and Collin make sure to keep their mustaches fresh and to carefully eat all their pies. You’ll be surprised by the cooked goose and the taco vs. grilled cheese fight. Train hard! Believe in yourself! “Stay sweet.”

Can't Hardly Wait

Fri, 31 May 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Congratulations to all of the graduates out there! It’s time for one last bash before the summer kicks off. Preston Meyers (Ethan Embry) has gone near obsessive-gaga over Amanda Beckett (Jennifer Love Hewitt) since freshman year. Now that Mike Dexter (Peter Facinelli) has broken up with her, maybe he can express his feelings to her. It all starts with a frosted strawberry Pop Tart. It’s kismet! Meanwhile, William Lichter (Charlie Korsmo) plots his revenge on Mike for the years of tournament. He’ll try to navigate through “Paradise City.” Also, Denise (Lauren Ambrose) is locked in a bathroom with Kenny (Seth Green) and his backpack of sexiness. RTS attend this soiree with high hopes and Barry Manilow in their hearts. Collin makes it clear that you can buy his flavor, but you can’t waste his flavor. Is everything just fated to happen? Can a letter change it all? When is the band going to start? Jerry O’Connell! What?!

The Golden Child

Fri, 24 May 2024 06:00:00 +0000

A private investigator, Chandler Jarrell (Eddie Murphy), who specializes in finding missing children is requested and destined to find the whereabouts of the kidnapped Golden Child (J.L. Reate). He’s been chosen! The frownie-faced, no no-nonsense villain Sardo Numspa (Charles Dance) and his monster henchman (who are the worst at their jobs) will try to bumble their way in completing their evil plans which is to make the world a hell. Kee (Charlotte Lewis) helps persuade Jarrell to visit Tibet, fight a bone demon and save the world. And when she’s not doing that, she’s flipping and kicking – some of that is into his heart. All of this is under the watchful eye of The Old Goupa (Victor Wong) and assisted by Doctor Hong (James Hong). RTS drinks some filthy water to obtain the Ajanti dagger. Totally worth it! Jeremy and La-Mar avoid eating the blood oatmeal and try out some monastery leaves. Be careful in your dreams, stay true to yourself and we all need to check in on “dear, sweet brother Numsy.”

Romancing the Stone

Fri, 17 May 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Joan Wilder (Kathleen Turner) is a popular romance author who gets a crash course in nonfiction when she has to save her kidnapped sister by delivering a treasure map to the criminal duo Ralph (Danny DeVito) and Ira (Zack Norman) in Columbia. Luckily, somewhat foolhardy, yet trustworthy, Jack Colton (Michael Douglas) shows up and agrees (for money) to guide Joan, which helps her find herself in her own adventure. Oh boy, are there going to be some crocodiles! Romance as well! Romance and crocodiles! Juan (Alfonso Arau) is a huge fan of Joan’s writing! Let’s go jungle-trucking with him! Meanwhile, Zolo (Manuel Ojeda) is going to mustache-knife his way to that treasure. RTS are intrigued by the cave tchotchke and boating in downtown New York. Collin, Jeremy and La-Mar go mud-sliding with the best of them and find secret jungle-plane tequila. Maybe this is where the pudding rings come from. This film is an adventure worthy of everyone’s time! In the end, friends celebrate Mother’s Day/week with some Voodoo Doughnuts, mimosas and a fun flick. You should too!

Hackers

Fri, 10 May 2024 06:00:00 +0000

It’s our 100^th episode! Let’s celebrate! Renoly Santiago (Phantom Phreak) from the film graciously joins us for an interview! How cool is that? Definitely tune in for this! And, thank you for listening! When he was a kid, Dade (Jonny Lee Miller) wrote a computer virus that crashed 1,507 computers and caused a seven-point drop in the New York Stock Exchange. Through court orders, he’s banned from computers until he turns 18. Fast forward, it’s his 18^th birthday and he has just moved to New York with his mom, and he’s going to finish his senior year of high school. Time to hack and meet some friends along the way. Amongst a hacking contest between his crush, Kate/”Acid Burn” (Angelina Jolie), and overseen by “Phreak”(Renoly Santiago), “Cereal” (Matthew Lillard) and “Nikon” (Laurence Mason), this crew forms true bonds that unite a global community, assist Joey (Jesse Bradford) in earning a hacking namesake and attempt to put a stop to The Plague (Fisher Stevens) and his schemes. We’re sorry, “Mr. The Plague.” This is Lillard’s fifth feature with us! Let’s get him the commemorative jacket! RTS embraces this epic soundtrack and wax philosophical hacking at Cyberdelia. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin strap into their rollerblades, check their pagers and zoom out into the city. This is a 90s must watch! Hey, if they’re “trashing your rights” then “hack the planet!”

The Crow

Fri, 03 May 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Based on the cult graphic novel by James O’Barr. After being brutally murdered alongside his fiancée, Eric Draven (Brandon Lee) comes back from the dead one year later. His purpose back on earth is to track down each of these lowlife, murderous garbage people and exact bloody vengeance upon them. In the background we have officer Albrecht (Ernie Hudson) investigating all these crimes while constantly being told to stay out of it. Sarah (Rochelle Davis), a child friend of the deceased couple, is also trying to piece this all together. Meanwhile, crime, led by Michael Wincott, is high, and the rain is relentless. The epic 90s soundtrack and score tie it all together. Hey, is that Candyman? RTS rock out on the rooftops as the sun sets. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin make sure they duck out of the rain to become professional hotdoggers. Emily makes her Rabbit Troop Sucks debut just in time before Motor City burns down on Devil’s Night. It was a tragic loss to lose Brandon Lee and in such a way. For everyone who worked on this film, this must have been emotionally difficult to finish and release. Definitely something that should be considered when viewing it.

Hell Comes to Frogtown

Fri, 26 Apr 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Sam Hell (Roddy Piper) brings us right back to another fallout world to survive in. We never learn much of this alt world outside of a need to breed for manpower, there are wars and there was mutation. Hell has got a rep, and when he gets duped into enlisting into Med-Tech, things get interesting. His mission: procreate “Hell style.” He is being led into the wastelands by Spangle (Sandahl Bergman) who he might create a few sparks with – but this will definitely not be influenced by her dancing. Centinella (Cec Verrell) is handy along the way and always has time for a smoke. Looney Tunes (Rory Calhoun) will be giving out fatherly wisdom, or most likely, he’ll just be shooting off some flares. But, in the darkness looms the mighty croak of Commander Toty (Brian Frank). Be warned! Or not. Dude seems to have a lot of weird things going on. RTS look for good times and possible employment in Frogtown. You think they need a couple of podcasting bartenders? Collin, La-Mar and Jeremy learn to avoid the three-snake dance. Bull (Nicolas Worth) is going to show us all the way of the chainsaw. “Shut your HOLLLLLLLLLE!”

Screamers

Fri, 19 Apr 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Listen, do you think a bunch of razorblade desert robo-vacs are going to stay that way? Oh, friends, we have a lot to tell you. Joe Hendricksson (Peter Weller) is a commander who gets orders to sort of help with peace treaty negotiations. Kind of a bummer because Joe likes his G&Ts and government-issued red cigarettes (which aid in fighting off radiation). This mining planet is absolute garbage. Time to slowly check it out. But, there must be two, so luckily Ace Jefferson (Andy Lauer) crash lands in town, has no more platoon and joins Joe in his wandering of the wastelands and fighting off robots. That’s handy because everything is a robot. What’s not a robot nowadays? RTS check out the local command center and all of their arcade futurism. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin get acquainted with Jessica (Jennifer Rubin) and Jessica (Jennifer Rubin)? Wait a minute! No, no, let this play out. Are you aware there might be a way off this crazy planet? Well, you might want to take that ride. Does anyone know this guy was RoboCop?

A Far Off Place

Fri, 12 Apr 2024 06:00:00 +0000

A true overlooked gem by Disney. A bratty teen, Harry (Ethan Embry), is forced on a trip with his father to meet family friends in Africa. When he meets knowledgeable and passionate Nonnie (Reese Witherspoon), he has to rethink his too cool for school ways. As they both sneak out for the night, they team up with an African bushman, Xhabbo (Sarel Bok), who urges them, based on his prophetic “tapping,” to stay the night in a nearby cave. This saves their lives as their parents are brutally murdered by poachers who are now after them. To survive, these three, with their dog, are forced to do what is thought of as the impossible, cross the Kalahari. It will take real growth and trust to make it happen. The cinematography is alluring all throughout this epic journey and loss of innocence. RTS is slightly altered for the week, and they stock up on all the water – especially the imported Hawaiian water. Mopani (Maximilian Schell) loves it almost as much as he loves hunting down poachers! Nemo takes on some co-hosting duties ninja-style. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar ride all of the elephants to freedom! “Wind can do it; we can do it.”

Over the Edge

Fri, 05 Apr 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Kurt Cobain said he had a good time with this film, and it was “total anarchy.” This smells like disagreement on our end. It’s Matt Dillion’s acting debut as Richie. He teams up with his buddy Carl (Michael Eric Kramer) to complain about business expansion in their neighborhood and their well-to-do boredom. Carl starts falling for Cory (Pamela Ludwig), but Mark (Vincent Spano) can’t go for that! Officer Doberman (Harry Northup) doesn’t like going for anything – especially if it is happening at the rec center. These kids probably need a bit of guidance. It’s definitely not coming from their parents or teachers. Then, these kids go bananas! Full bananas! Drown it all out with Cheap Trick! Fun note: all of this was filmed in Colorado. There are many scenes in Aurora and Greeley. RTS will be rocking out with this killer soundtrack and avoiding the dirt bike swamp track. Jeremy and La-Mar will be at the park mingling and warming themselves over trash can fires. We lost KC 30 years ago. His art and words are still felt today. “Your scent is still here in my place of recovery.”

Silverado

Fri, 29 Mar 2024 06:00:00 +0000

A bunch of rad fellas befriend one another in the Old West and attempt to shut down the corrupt nonsense happening all around. Emmett (Scott Glenn) is being harassed after being released from prison, and he’s not having it! Paden (Kevin Kline) was having it, but all of his belongings have been stolen, so he’s given up, and he has a new view on life. Jake (Kevin Costner) is ready (for anything, really), but he’s behind bars. Let’s bust him out so he can not have it pistoleer style! Mal (Danny Glover) is absolutely NOT having it! If there was an opposite of having it, Mal is living that life. Somehow, these four make it all work together. And, “It” is hunting down and putting a stop to villainy. RTS will be keeping it charming in the saloon with Stella (Linda Hunt). Collin, La-Mar and Jeremy will be at the card table with Slick (Jeff Goldblum) while ditching Hannah (Rosanna Arquette). Where did that boot knife go? Make sure to polish your sheriff’s badge when you have time. We don’t want another Cobb (Brian Dennehy) sullying everything. Not in the decent town of Silverado. Come for the promises. Stay in the grave. But, in all seriousness, this is an excellent film that deserves to be watched.

Small Soldiers

Fri, 22 Mar 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Director Joe Dante leads us into a suburban toy war. There’s more to these gizmos than just plastic. Meanwhile, Alan Abernathy (Gregory Smith) and Christy Fimple (Kristen Dunst) have so much going for them – and so much in their way. Irwin (David Cross) and Larry (Jay Mohr) have created a sentient robo-army for Gil Mars (Denis Leary), and that army is gunning for these wannabe sweethearts. Chip Hazard (Tommy Lee Jones) leads the Commando Elite against Archer (Frank Langella) and the Gorgonites –and everyone who likes the Gorgonites. Combat is inevitable! There are scooter chase scenes! There are explosions! There is terror! Where did Brad go? We say thank you and goodbye to Phil Hartman and his last live action role. RTS joins in on the chaos with the Gwendy Doll army! La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy take shelter when the CE start their home assault rampage. If you know how microchips work, then microchip! MICROCHIP!

Firewalker

Fri, 15 Mar 2024 06:00:00 +0000

What do you do when you catch a bad case of the Firewalker? Oh, wait! This might be for something else. This is all about gold! There is a mix of Aztec, Mayan, Egyptian and Apache gold all in one area! If that seems strange and improbable, maybe that’s the Firewalker talking! Loveable and adventurous scamps, Max Donigan (Chuck Norris) and Leo Porter (Louis Gossett Jr.) team up with Patricia Goodwin (Melody Anderson) to follow a magical dagger and her visions to that sweet, sweet cave of gold. When things seem down, Corky Taylor (John Rhys-Davies) shows up! Is this a bit of DeJa’Vu? YES! Yes it is! RTS chills with Tall Eagle (Will Sampson) and wonders if any of that promised treasure will come his way. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar summon ancestral supernatural powers with El Coyote (Sonny Landham). Between the numerous bar stops and jungle runs, director J. Lee Thompson will get us to that gold! At least we hope.

Solarbabies

Fri, 08 Mar 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Look at those lil’ Solar-Bs go! “There is a Legend.” Smokey Robinson helps shed some light on that legend. But, does he? Daniel (Lukas Haas) uncovers it in an old mine. Jason (Jason Patric), Terra (Jami Gertz) and the rest of the Solarbabies just want freedom – and water. And, they probably want new lives and a lot of other stuff, so they help get this legend going Solar-B style! Grock (Richard Jordan) and his evil M. Bison crew (which includes Fake Johnny) detest the sphere of Longinus. It really grates their orphanage potatoes. They want to laser it! There is a lot of Bohdai glow-fun nonetheless, and cousin Chodai makes many appearances. RTS goes pathfinding with Darstar (Adrian Pasdar) and his cool-as-hell owl. La-Mar affixes sturdy plastic flashlights to his boot-skates and zooms into the desert land. Later at night, let’s all hold hands and orb-circ - at least until the water is free for all. “There is a legend.”

Cliffhanger

Fri, 01 Mar 2024 07:00:00 +0000

It feels good (for us) to be home. Welcome to the Rocky Mountains! Gabe Walker (Sylvester Stallone), aka Cliff Hanger, doesn’t own decent gloves and doesn’t have his strong hands, so when he drops Hal’s (Michael Rooker) gal pal, they become a couple of grumps towards each other. He’s been working in Denver ever since, but now he’s back. When Jessie (Janine Turner) isn’t complicating the life of Dr. Joel Fleischman or brushing horses, she’s flying a rescue helicopter and trying to make things work with Gabe. All of this takes another turn when it rains thousand-dollar bills and Eric Qualen (John Lithgow) and his villainous accent create more than just avalanches. Richard Travers (Rex Linn) cannot swear his way out of any of this! RTS will be creating art with Frank (Ralph Waite) and smiling all along the way. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar burn stacks of money to stay warm and to prove that they can. Get your drinks ready with “Damn-a-ta with a twist of impalement.” That’s right! For every utterance of “damn,” and for any impalement, drink! We hope you can HANG in there! You get it! Cliff believes in you! So does gravity!

The Cable Guy

Fri, 23 Feb 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Kicked out after asking his girlfriend to marry him, Steven Kovacs (Matthew Broderick) is just looking for some kind of win. Trying to bribe his cable guy (Jim Carry) for a hookup leads down an interesting path. Robin (Leslie Mann) is looking for a stronger relationship. Steven’s father (George Segal) is concerned that you are taking “the pot.” Rick (Jack Black) just wants to go to a concert! And, there’s a couple of rounds of Porno Password with the family. With all of this going on, is there even time to watch the Sam Sweet (Ben Stiller) verdict? Can you even imagine a world where everyone was glued to a screen? Can you imagine being raised by one? Can you fathom 1996’s limited channel options and a lack of streaming services? RTS hosts Denver’s most epic karaoke party and dishes out some “scramby” eggs. La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy will be jousting and wearing chicken skins at Medieval Times. Tune in for this polarizing precautionary tale. Ever hear the phone ring while blow-drying your hair? Call us. Let’s talk about it! “Salt Peanuts. Salt peanuts.”

She's All That

Fri, 16 Feb 2024 07:00:00 +0000

It’s Valentine’s week, and hopefully no one has broken your heart. Growing up, what are your memories of romance? Grab some Sweetarts, and let’s take a trip back. After getting dumped, highschooler Zach Siler (Freddie Prinze Jr.) makes a bet with Dean Sampson (Paul Walker) that he can turn introverted art student Laney Boggs (Rachael Leigh Cook) into the belle of the ball. This Pygmalion transformation is epic! Once Laney gets a haircut, takes off her glasses and puts on a dress, you will see her true ultimate form! Watch the school’s cutie become “ALL THAT.” Now, nothing can stop her! Art houses, beach trips, parties, dances, etc… Is anyone doing any homework in high school? The cast list is impressive! Kevin Pollak, Anna Paquin, Kieran Culkin, Dulé Hill, Gabrielle Union, Elden Henson, Clea DuVall, Usher, and others make appearances. Matthew Lillard makes his fourth appearance in a film here! 4-peat! RTS consider joining the “dork outreach program.” La-Mar and Collin become part of a “brilliant” performance piece and then make sure the hacky sack doesn’t drop. We hope love blossoms and you melt the heart of a “falafel fairy.”

Winners and Sinners

Fri, 09 Feb 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Happy Lunar New Year! Join us as we celebrate with some Hong Kong cinema. 5 Lucky Stars: Teapot (Sammo Kam-Bo Hung), Curly (John Sham), Exhaust Pipe (Richard Ng), Vaseline (Charlie Chin) and Rookie (Stanley Sui-Fan Fung) have all been released from prison. Crime is behind them as they now run a cleaning service with the help of Curly’s sister, Shirley (Cherie Chung). Unfortunately, these fellas are crime magnets, and some mob bosses have counterfeiting plates and money that unintentionally finds its way to this cleaning crew. The mob wants it all back! CID 07 (Jackie Chan) will make some random appearances that may or may not assist in taking down these crime organizations. But, worry not, there is ALWAYS time for a martial arts rumble! RTS shmooze their way into fancy parties and look forward to cash rewards. La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy make sure you won’t get robbed the next time you head to the food court. Make sure to steadily practice the art of invisibility. Be calm! Be Brave! It’s the Year of the Wood Dragon!

Turbo Kid

Fri, 02 Feb 2024 07:00:00 +0000

The future is closer than you think! It is a window into an alternate past. The future is a loop? The year is 1997! The future is upon us. Times are tough, friends. Getting some water and a comic will cost you epic amounts of scavenging hours – you earn very little exp. The Kid (Munro Chambers) is just trying to get by. When he meets up with Apple (Laurence Leboeuf), his world becomes interesting and a bit dreamy. Electric-blue eyes and pink hair dreamy. Too bad Zeus (Michael Ironside) and his head henchman Skeletron (Edwin Wright) are being ’97 boners about everything. Frederick (Aaron Jeffery) is effectively arm-wrestling everyone in his way, but things get complicated. Alt future/past ’97 complicated! Paths cross and forces are joined. RTS get an education on robot lore and scope out nearby scrapyards. Jeremey and La-Mar deflect buzzsaw blades and question their water source. Can TK BMX his way into your heart? YES! Grab your View-Master and listen to this masterpiece soundtrack. Turbo!

Hudson Hawk

Fri, 26 Jan 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Eddie Hawkins, aka “Hudson Hawk” (Bruce Willis), is the best cat burglar in the city! In the country! In the world? But, he’s quit all that, or so he thinks. He’s just been released from prison and is already being blackmailed back into another job involving alchemy and Da Vinci art. This fella just wants a cappuccino! Luckily, his pal Tommy “Five-Tone” (Danny Aiello) is there to accompany him on his peculiar heist and to sing a little bit of Bing Crosby and other hits – when there is or isn’t time. Numerous covert and/or villainous groups want in on this hot crime! We have the eccentric Darwin (Richard E. Grant) and Minerva (Sandra Bernhard) Mayflower, The Candy Bars led by George Kaplan (James Coburn) and the Mario brothers! Who knew? Anna (Andie MacDowell) and her faith cannot fight off the magnetism she has for “Hawk.” She has her own secrets though. RTS will be wearing dusters and leaping from rooftop to rooftop within the shadows of the night. La-Mar and Collin will be hopscotching around with the Mayflowers – Jeremy has an early valentine for Minerva. Is this film part of your past? Will it be part of your future? “My name is Kit Kat. This is not a dream.”

Dirty Work

Fri, 19 Jan 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Mitch (Norm MacDonald) has a long history with his best friend, Sam (Artie Lange). He learns that Sam is his brother. Pops (Jack Warden) has been productive throughout the years, but he’s got a bad ticker. He’s been like a father and is now his father. For real! Dr. Farthing (Chevy Chase) will help get Pops a better heart for 50K! As one would, Mitch chooses to start a revenge business to raise cash. He has to get dirty! It’s a dirty business! And, the work? Dirty! Kathy (Traylor Howard) doesn’t know what to make of any of it. Christoper McDonald is back for another week being mean. RTS uncovers a secret infatuation with Full House and the characters in the show. Collin and La-Mar join in the fun and get awfully messy. Sometimes you must get a little dirty to get clean. Wait! No, you don’t! We miss you Norm, Bob and many of the cast and crew in this film.

Terminal Velocity

Fri, 12 Jan 2024 07:00:00 +0000

Richard ‘Ditch’ Brodie (Charlie Sheen) is the bad boy of the sky. If you are into that, you know all about Ditch’s antics around Arizona. He becomes insta-smitten upon meeting a hesitant student, Chris (Nastassja Kinski), wanting to skydive for the first time. His over-the-top flirtations distract him, and the fun day out turns brutal. But not all is what it seems. Was she former KGB? There is gold! The Russian mafia wants that gold! James Gandolfini might want some of that gold! You know Christopher McDonald wants that sweet, sweet gold! There is intrigue and espionage but there is sky gold! RTS will be watching all of this safely from the ground. What kind of drinks do they have around these parts? La-Mar will be keeping his distance from Sheen-shenie but will also be taking some of that tantalizing gold. Ditch highlights his former Olympian days. Is this Gymkata in the sky? They wish!

Dredd

Fri, 05 Jan 2024 07:00:00 +0000

We made it to a new year! Is this the year you were hoping for? Judge Dredd (Karl Urban) is all about justice. It’s his job! He’s now tasked with the assessment of a potential new judge, Cassandra Anderson (Olivia Thirlby) – and she’s a psychic. A routine patrol goes bonkers quickly when Ma-Ma (Lena Headey) and her gang don’t like what these judges are up to. Mr. Dredd isn’t about that hot garbage, and Anderson is all about nawwww. Time to shoot your way out of this future noise. If you’re a baddy, a bullet or a psychic blast might be headed your way. RTS check out all the local haunts in Mega-City One. What kind of ice-cream do you think we can get? Are we eating it on Slo-Mo? Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar buff their cybernetic implants and barricade amongst the unstoppable gangs. You don’t need a clairvoyant to tell you that this film is pure fire. We are telling you! The judge has been judged – awesomely!

End of Days

Fri, 29 Dec 2023 07:00:00 +0000

The end is nigh! Every thousand years the devil visits earth to impregnate someone, spawn the antichrist, take over the world and destroy it, etc… You know the story. But, it’s this year! So, now it’s happening! Jericho Cane (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is depressed. His life is in shambles and is circling the drain. Although he cares very little for anything, he will be damned if the devil (Gabrriel Bryne) is going to have his way with Christine (Robin Tunney) and ruin the New Year’s Eve festivities. RTS wade their way through delusional promises and have a good time. Jeremy and Collin grab a bite with Bobby Chicago (Kevin Pollak) and meld into others. Pour a glass of bubbly and enjoy this terminator take on supernatural forces. Make sure to have fresh biscotti if you run into the Vatican Knights. Salute!

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

Fri, 22 Dec 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Happy Holidays! We are back with, what is for many, a holiday classic. For others, this might have slipped past them over the years. However you found yourself to this film, you have found a holiday present. Kevin McCallister (Macaulay Culkin) is back causing mischief, booby-trapping houses and striving to find the perfect Christmas. He might learn, again, what the season is really all about, but this time it will be in New York after he accidentally boards the wrong plane. Conveniently, the same criminals from the original, Harry (Joe Pesci) and Marv (Daniel Stern), have broken out of prison just in time to run into Kevin on the streets of New York. These Sticky Bandits plan on robbing a toy store. And, now that Kevin is charged with the holy spirit/pigeon magic and has a new torture house, the season is back on! Meanwhile, Kate McCallister (Catherine O’Hara) leads the family in a charge to find her son. She’s never lost her luggage though. This was written by John Hughes and directed by Chris Columbus! Tim Curry is in it! What else do you need? RTS will be playing at Duncan’s Toy Chest with a nice cheese pizza. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin will be ordering three scoops of ice-cream. They’re not driving! It’s all about the nuts of the season! “Turtle doves.”

The Gingerdead Man

Fri, 15 Dec 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Just in time for the holidays, we have a listener request from our friend Paul. We have all the ingredients to make the holiday even more magical. Millard Findlemeyer (Gary Busey) is a cold-blooded criminal. After robbing a diner and shooting everyone up, he is eventually caught, convicted and executed. His ashes and some guy’s blood are thrown into an industrial mixer, molded into a gingerbread man, placed into an oven and, well, we think you know where this is going. You’re right! Gary Busey plays the loveable and incoherent “Gingerdead Man.” He’s back from beyond the grave to wish you warm tidings. Knife tidings! Sarah (Robin Sydney) and her questionable group of townies battle this confectionary demon with their wits, a magical gun and a little bit of the holiday spirit. Also, Sarah’s mom has a lot of spirits too. RTS engage in a pie to the face war. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar decorate the bakery in garland and finish off the spiked eggnog. You’ll knead this movie this holiday season!

Gymkata

Fri, 08 Dec 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Jonathan Cabot (Kurt Thomas) is an American gymnast who travels to Parmistan to enter in a last man standing survival game. What is the winner given? A wish from The Khan of Parmistan. More specifically, the U.S. government wants to set up a satellite there. We are sure these would be everyone’s first wishes as well. This is a strange journey that Joanathan will embark on. He starts ‘embarking’ with Princess Rubali (Tetchie Agbayani). She assists in “all forms” of training. She’s also trying to stop Zamir (Richard Norton) from overthrowing her father. They are also engaged. It might get needlessly complicated in areas, but that’s Gymkata, baby! RTS will definitely be hanging out with the guy with the ginormous hawk. Collin, La-Mar and Jeremy will be keeping their distance from Thorg (Bob Schott) and will follow the ninjas – but only the cool ninjas. This movie will aerial cartwheel its way into your heart! Well, if you can make it past the rope bridge.

Speed Racer

Fri, 01 Dec 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Let’s start a month where there are presents for all. Speed Racer (Emile Hirsch) is the fastest on the track. He’s a force to be reckoned with. “He’ s a demon on wheels.” When his racing family is approached by Royalton (Roger Allam) and his shady but infinitely wealthy company for sponsorship, and when Speed declines his offer, things take a dark turn. There’s much more than racing going on here. Who is really in control? Racer X (Matthew Fox) will unravel some mysteries and participate in secret racing with Speed. Taejo Togokhan (Rain) forms a temporary alliance. We are treated to all the fun and classic characters such as Trixie (Christina Ricci), Mom (Susan Sarandon), Pops (John Goodman) and Spritle (Paulie Litt) and Chim Chim. RTS strap into their Mach 5s and gun it. La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy take to the skies in their helicopters and keep us safe. “All you gotta do is listen. Close your eyes and listen.”

Tower Heist

Fri, 24 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000

We hope you all ate 50 pounds of food and are now ready for a heist – a tower heist! Blend yourself a smoothie of potatoes and gravy, and let’s get the money back that is owed to you. Josh Kovaks (Ben Stiller) is a diligent manager of a wealthy condo complex and does everything that is asked of him – and more! This includes supervising the pensions of the employees at the tower. When Arthur Shaw (Alan Alda) is arrested, it becomes clear that he has stolen all the employees’ pensions, and he is most likely going to walk. Hard work leads Josh to only losses when the game is rigged. With some ego prodding from FBI agent Claire Denham (Téa Leoni), Josh enlists the help of an incredible group of people with special skill sets. Slide (Eddie Murphy) trains them to become criminals. Charlie (Casey Affleck) flip flops through the plan. Enrique (Michael Peña) oversees all things electric. Odessa (Gabourey Sidibe) can crack any safe. Mr. Fitzhugh (Matthew Broderick) is a human calculator and simply amazing. If they can get their acts together, this team might get some payback. RTS will sneak through backrooms and elevators during this covert mission. La-Mar and Collin will be drinking cranberry martinis while distracting you with the Thanksgiving Day Parade. Why spend on Black Friday when you can take it back?

Rollerball

Fri, 17 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Another broken future is coming for you! But, this one has sports! Jonathan E. (James Caan) is the best around in Rollerball, but now he is being asked to retire after this season's championship. He wants answers – he has too many questions about everything. Some corporate executive took his wife, Ella (Maud Adams). That’s something most would wonder about. Those in power, such as Mr. Bartholomew (John Houseman), do not like this. Answering questions in the future is not how it’s done! Having 4 TVs in every room so you can pine over your stolen wife by watching surveillance video and horse rides with her is how it’s done! Moonpie (John Beck) is the party teammate you want to have looking out for you. RTS kicks some computers while looking for answers. Collin and Jeremy lace up their skates and gas up their motorcycles for this hot action! No penalties for being amazing! Grab your “privilege pass” and let’s hang out.

The Running Man

Fri, 10 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Richard Bachman is Stephen King, the author of this book! He brings us into a dystopian future (seems like all the futures are going this way) where corporations rule and freedoms are restricted. Ben Richards (Arnold Schwarzenegger), a soldier, somehow just learned of the future and how the future operates, so he’s not in for randomly killing innocent people when ordered to do so. Future baddies don’t like this, so they arrest him, manipulate the media with public lies and they eventually put him on a game show. Within the game, hosted by Damon Killian (Richard Dawson), Richards learns a lot about friendship, love and the power of people – just like a trip to summer camp. Amber (Maria Conchita Alonso) finds out the truth of it all, and there are tons of fun cameos – including Yaphet Kotto, Jim Brown and Jesse Ventura. RTS will be getting an autograph from Professor Subzero (Professor Toru Tanaka – you are missed). Chris joins us to chainsaw where chainsaws don’t belong. Mario makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut, and he makes sure we all get the home version of the game. Tune in and make sure you return beyond the reruns. Always trust Kelton Flame Throwers!

Demolition Man

Fri, 03 Nov 2023 06:00:00 +0000

In 1996, Det. John Spartan (Sylvester Stallone) is sent to a cryo-prison because he has awesomely brought in maniac Simon Phoenix (Wesley Snipes), and he is just too rad for modern society. In 2032, this “Demolition Man” is reinstated, and this upgraded killer is let loose on the wimps of the future. Lt. Lenina Huxley (Sandra Bullock) is smitten with this chaotic crime spree (and Murder Death Kills) and learning from Spartan’s action-forward ways. Seems there has been little crime since the earthquake of 2010. Edgar Friendly (Denis Leary) and his underground gang want in on some Taco Bell. TB did win the Franchise Wars, so they are quite popular! RTS will be hanging underground but not eating rat burgers! La-Mar and Jeremy are naturals at the three seashells but are not fans of the lack of salt and alcohol. Let’s all look at this future where VR sex is awful, but the streets are clean. The music is amazing, but the food lacks everything! Seems like a real boggle!

Tales From the Crypt: Demon Knight

Tue, 31 Oct 2023 06:00:00 +0000

It’s time for another SUPER HALLOWEEN SPOOKTACULAR episode! Happy Halloween from RTS! The stars have aligned on the palm of Brayker (William Sadler), a man (and Demon Knight) on the run with what might be the most important mission in the universe. Tracking him and breaking hearts along the way, we have The Collector (Billy Zane). He’s hellbent on finding Brayker’s key/container that contains the blood of Christ. If he obtains this key (the last of seven), the universe will become a demon’s playground. This night turns into a vicious game of hide and seek – with demons and demon goo! Jada Pinkett Smith, CCH Pounder, Dick Miller, Thomas Haden Church and others make appearances in an attempt to survive within an inn until sunup. La-Mar and Jeremy shield their minds and try not to get Zaned! The Crypt Keeper is there – laughing! Join for this RTS ghoulish Halloween episode and for some party trivia

House

Fri, 27 Oct 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Roger Cobb (William Katt) is the Greatest American Hero and an okay writer – maybe. He’s got a lot going on. He’s going through a divorce with Sandy (Kay Lenz), their child has been missing for a questionable amount of time, he’s writing a terrible book and there are weird demons (including Richard Moll) haunting his newly inherited house. Side note: Aunt Elizabeth (Susan French) might be the real villain here. Luckily, Harold (George Wendt) is always nearby with some beers and Chinese takeout. Tanya (Mary Stavin) will be wearing little and swimming outside or dropping off her kid for impromptu babysitting. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin take on this evil and endure Cobb’s endless drone writing about walking around. Why did this house want to haunt anyone? Who knows! RTS want to give you answers, but only a bathroom mirror portal can help you now.

Something Wicked This Way Comes

Fri, 20 Oct 2023 06:00:00 +0000

It’s October in the 30s in Green Town, Illinois in the world of Ray Bradbury. The townspeople are full of memories and regrets. Kids will be kids. Evil will lurk. Dark’s Pandemonium Carnival comes to town, and evil does lurk! Green mist-lurking! Will Halloway (Vidal Peterson) and his best friend Jim Nightshade (Shawn Carson) are relentless with their curiosity about the carnival and those who run it. Mr. Dark (Jonathan Pryce) is sick of their childish tomfoolery and constant interference, and while he is granting wishes/taking souls (it gets spiritually complicated) in town, he's on the search for Will and Jim. Charles Halloway (Jason Robards) is Will’s dad and too old to swim? He's under the doc’s orders for daily cigars though. RTS will be running wild in the woods at night. There’s a night train to catch! Jeremy and Collin get SUPER into “dust witch” and things of the like. ‘Tis the season! Keep carving your pumpkins and watching Are You Afraid of the Dark? Also, be careful what you wish for.

Shocker

Fri, 13 Oct 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Horace Pinker (Mitch Pileggi) is on a killing spree! This seems convenient in a town that does little about it. Jonathan (Peter Berg) is having a bad life. Everyone he loves has been taken by Pinker – except Lt. dad/Don (Michael Murphy). Now that Jonathan has magic dream powers and an “anything goes” town pass, he’s ready to track down Pinker, send him to be executed and then chase him into a beyond death electric game of cat and mouse and possession cat and mouse (which is hardcore in cat/mouse circuits). RTS join the football team/the real Dudes of Wrath. La-Mar and Jeremy are SHOCKED to find out how it all ends. Does it ever really end? A child drives a backhoe. Allison (Camille Cooper) is a ghost flirt. Rhino (Richard Brooks) is a true BFF! John Tesh, what’s going on!?

Maximum Overdrive

Fri, 06 Oct 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Welcome to the start of Halloween month! What better way to start than being attacked by machines that have come to life? “You can’t! We made you!” Bill (Emilio Estevez) is just a short order cook working for Bubba (Pat Hingle) at the Dixie Boy when he’s called to become a hero. This hero is mainly hooking up Brett (Laura Harrington) and figuring out how to survive. And, this is Estevez’s third movie with us! Did you know there was a UFO in this story? Did you know this was the only film directed by Stephen King? Yeardley Smith is here! AC/DC is going to rock your face off! RTS will be hiding out in the arcade with the guy from Breaking Bad during much of this. La-Mar launches many-a-rocket towards the machines! Ryan makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut, and he is representing Fiction Beer Company. He graciously brings us beer goodies and discusses the brew as we view. Make sure to try their Sweet Sedition of Magic (Pumpkin Amber with spices) and MAV – Oktoberfest all month long. We will be! Taste the fall! Hide from the diffuse tail of Rhea-M.

Wizards

Fri, 29 Sep 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Thousands and thousands of years after the world’s collapse and collapse again, twin wizards are born. One, Avatar (Bob Holt), focuses on peace and smoking cigars with scantily clad fairies. The other, Blackwolf (Steve Gravers) is obsessed with war, propaganda and destruction. RTS adores post-apocalyptic scenarios and assembling crews. After a failed assassination attempt from Necron 99, Avatar gets his fellowship in order. With a reprogrammed assassin (now known as Peace), a fiery elf, Weehawk (Richard Romanus), and half-fairy, Elinore (Jesse Welles), they set out to sing, to get intoxicated and bewitched with the fairy folk and most importantly, to take down evil to restore the land. Collin and La-Mar discuss our first animated film and secretly take a multitude of fae elixirs. By the end of this episode, we’ll all be rolling a D20 to see if we make it through unscathed.

The Stuff

Fri, 22 Sep 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Corporations are scrambling to find out what the ingredients of The Stuff are. It’s so good! Have some Stuff! You know you want to! Hell, people are eating it from the ground! To find the truth of it all, we have a real crack crew investigating it. David ‘Mo’ Rutherford (Michael Moriarty) is hired as a corporate spy. He somehow has unlimited funds and immediately hires and dates Nicole (Andrea Marcovicci). They pick up Jason (Scott Bloom) to make poor decisions. And, we have ‘Chocolate Chip’ Charlie (Garrett Morris) on a mission to get his money back. Get ready for a “goo” drinking game. The mention of “goo” is good for a sip – don’t be a heavy pour here. RTS goes “bonkers” in a grocery store to get away from Stuff consumption. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin get goo-tastic with this goo-riffic film! The horror! The loss! The intrigue? Double your drinks/sips when someone randomly gets punched in the face! “Everyone has to eat some shaving cream once in a while.”

Dead Man's Curve

Fri, 15 Sep 2023 06:00:00 +0000

There is a familiar story here. Two affluent college students, Tim (Matthew Lillard) and Chris (Michael Vartan), kill their roommate, Rand (Randall Batinkoff), and make it look like a suicide. The plan is to then accept the school’s policy of giving students who have a deceased roommate all A’s for the semester. Things quickly start to unravel amongst the friends, Emma (Keri Russell) becomes more involved in this crime and things might not be exactly as they seem. RTS love Matthew Lillard – it’s his three-peat! We learn a lot while hanging out at that lighthouse with these students. Jeremy and Collin help to unravel this mystery and to smoke some random cigars everywhere that is inconvenient for everyone else. Join us for this second part of our back to school special. School or die! Don’t forget to pack a suitcase when you jump into the water. And, always carry some nunchucks!

Dead Man on Campus

Fri, 08 Sep 2023 06:00:00 +0000

When Josh (Tom Everett Scott) isn’t drumming for the Oneders, he’s trying to go to school for a medical degree in the 90s. His roommate, Cooper (Mark-Paul Gosselaar), is trying to go to school for parties and nonstop fun. The problem is that Cooper is likeable, and he sucks Josh into his never-ending merriment. Now, both face the realities of failing the semester. Josh will lose his scholarship. Cooper will lose his dad’s tuition payments. They learn that there is a school policy that states if anyone’s roommate dies, surviving students will receive all A’s. Now, this duo is in search of their future roommate, “Mr. Z.” They’re betting on the worst for them to score the best. RTS will meet an array of interesting characters. Collin, La-Mar and Jeremy discuss their amazing attendance records and these improbable situations. Join us for part one of two in this back to school special. School or die! Buckley (Randy Pearlstein) forever!

The Hard Way

Fri, 01 Sep 2023 06:00:00 +0000

John Moss (James Woods) is the stereotypical cop you know from any drama series. He’s foul-mouthed. He is divorced and trying to make a new relationship work. His job consumes him. He’s hunting down a serial killer in New York. And, his life gets even more complicated when an eager but oblivious to the real world actor, Nick Lang (Michael J. Fox), shows up to shadow him for a possible upcoming role. Between these two polar opposites running around and Party Crasher (Stephen Lang) shooting everything up, New York might be in trouble! RTS have a lot of fun with this buddy action comedy, getting to see LL Cool J and enjoying some “frog dogs.” We even get to see Greendale Community College alum, Luis Guzmán. La-Mar, Jeremy and the Captain get new merch jackets and hats. Sarah makes her Rabbit Troop Sucks debut to make sure this all plays out by the books. And, in the end, you will only get one take at this.

Volunteers

Fri, 25 Aug 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Recent 1962 Yale graduate Lawrence Bourne III (Tom Hanks) is an “Ivy League schlemiel.” After racking up an outrageous gambling debt and failing to get daddy’s help to pay it off, in an attempt to flee all his responsibilities, he quickly trades places with his buddy Kent who is working for the Peace Corps and heading to Thailand. Once there, and forced to stay, Lawrence might change his ways – or at least adapt them. It’s not all bad! There’s a budding romance with Beth (Rita Wilson). At Toon (Gedde Watanabe) is a true friend and fun to hang with. Tom Tuttle from Tacoma (John Candy) has specialized training and a mind like a steel trap. And, we get to meet John (Tim Thomerson) and “Mike.” A different kind of Mike. Play it cool with RTS when the red army and the local crime syndicate need access to a bridge. Collin examines this film like a real hot rod. And, if anyone is having romantic troubles, just remember, “she’s no good for you, big guy.”

Without a Paddle

Fri, 18 Aug 2023 06:00:00 +0000

The loss of a close friend and the funeral that follows reunites Jerry (Matthew Lillard), Dan (Seth Green) and Tom (Dax Shepard). To honor their friend and fulfill their childhood dreams, they decide to track down D.B. Cooper’s hijacked cash. Secret money? Treasure? Goonies-esque adventures? Make sure to hit up RTS if you have any hot leads on where such loot is located. To grow and conquer what the world is dishing out, these friends will experience it all along the way. Losing all the food and supplies, running from crazed pot farmers, a mommy bear who just wants to love, Flower and Butterfly! Oh my! La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy are all in for this fortune-seeking adventure. Together, we learn that sometimes the real treasure has been inside all of us all along. But, you know that’s BS and you want that cold hard cash!

The To Do List

Fri, 11 Aug 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Sex! Sex! Sex! It’s 1993 and Brandy Klark (Aubrey Plaza) just graduated high school as valedictorian. As you have guessed, the public education system has left some things out – and that includes anything about sex education. Now, determined to become sexually experienced before college starts, this academic go-getter gives herself some summer homework – with some guidance from her friends and her sister, Amber (Rachel Bilson). During the day she works at the local pool for Willy (Bill Hader), and during the night Brandy juggles dates with Cameron (Johnny Simmons) and others while checking off a list in an attempt to achieve the final goal with Rusty Waters (Scott Porter). RTS are hanging at the pool this summer, and so should you! La-Mar and Nemo discuss this sex positive summer romp over Otter Pops, a SNES and a fun 90s soundtrack. When are we all going to Water World?

Judgement Night

Fri, 04 Aug 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Attending a friends night out for a boxing match? Fun! Taking a wrong turn to beat traffic? Questionable. Witnessing a murder and being chased by Denis Leary, House of Pain and others? Now, this night just got bizarre and exciting! This is exactly what happens to four friends (including Emilio Estevez, Cuba Gooding Jr. and Stephen Dorff). They will take you on a wild ride that includes destinations such as totally abandoned city blocks, train yards, sewer systems (sorry, no Ninja Turtles!), street after street and some kind of flea market/multilevel strip mall. Note: as we keep score of the team body count, RTS have a group bigger than any of these. And, we have our own Jeremy – a better Jeremy! We are also joined by La-Mar and Collin while we all try to flee the city in the strangest ways. The soundtrack is incredible! A special shoutout to Peter Greene who plays Sykes. You are amazing!

Get Smart

Fri, 28 Jul 2023 06:00:00 +0000

When the world is threatened with KAOS, it’s good to have Control. Too bad the rest of the government believes otherwise. After the destruction of the head office, Maxwell Smart (Steve Carell) gets promoted to his dream job of becoming a field agent. He’s no dummy, but he sure can use some help. Luckily, Max's partner, Agent 99 (Anne Hathaway), has a sleek, tough wardrobe to back her spy skills and face-kicks. Each with a special skill set, these two will have a lot to learn from one another. We also have Agent 23 (Dwayne Johnson) showing everyone up and getting the job done, but now he’s stuck at his desk. The Chief (Alan Arkin) doesn’t really know what to do with any of these misfits, and the world, yet again, is under threat. Collin and Nemo join us to go undercover, to use fun gadgets and to sexily dance through lasers. Nemo also gets to discuss her boo, Johnson. RTS encourages you to bring your shoe phones and your cone of silence. Thank you to the Westword for your recent write-up! We miss you, Alan Arkin! A swordfish almost went through your head!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Fri, 21 Jul 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Do you have a 90s childhood or part of one? Need to borrow one? You might need to start here. Reporter April O’Neil (Judith Hoag) is digging up too much dirt on the rumors of an ancient ninja gang who may now be operating in New York. The Shredder (James Saito) delivers a slap message to silence it. What is his master plan outside of fathering wayward teens and owning the world’s coolest warehouse? As we figure that out, he will continue onward with his crime wave. He also kidnaps Master Splinter (Kevin Clash). The four ninja brothers (Leonardo, Donatello, Raphel and Michelangelo) you know and love are here to put a stop to it and to hang with April. Street vigilante Casey Jones (Elias Koteas) is here for the assist – and to hang with April. This is going to be a bodacious time! La-Mar and Collin slice and dice their way through some Foot Clan madness. RTS scramble for some fun pizza! Popular pizza bars and restaurants in Denver are shutting down. Please, stop! There’s only one way to make it all work, and that’s going to take some turtle power! Do you prefer cowabunga?

Cyborg 2: Glass Shadow

Fri, 14 Jul 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Corporations of the future enjoy making sensual cyborg assassins. In a world with heavy laws against cyborg and human relations, they all really want sexy times to happen. Cash (Angelina Jolie), an all-too-real cyborg, has cartwheeled her way into Colton’s (Elias Koteas) heart and, um, nether regions. Now, on the run to save the endless love they established in the last 5 minutes, they are led by the digital teeth and huffy voice of Mercy (Jack Palance) while being hunted down by a thin-skinned psycho, Danny (Billy Drago). We miss you, Billy! La-Mar joins our pursuit in this low-fi electro-brawling future. Can RTS make sure that there is love and not sex bombs? Can Angelina Jolie ninja her way out of this film? Also, it’s our anniversary! Let’s celebrate! Thank you for listening!

Deep Rising

Fri, 07 Jul 2023 06:00:00 +0000

John Finnegan (Treat Williams) just wants to do a job and get paid. A bunch of mercenaries and a weird nerd who owns a cruise boat put a stop to that! Joey (Kevin J. O’Connor) adds some whiny chaos. Trillian (Famke Janssen) sneaks around like a sneaky sneak. Hanover (Wes Studi) leads gun first. Oh, and there are massive tentacle monsters sucking the liquids out of all humans and leaving their goo-bones behind! So, kind of a terrible cruise! Worry not, RTS have a plan! It involves a torpedo and a jet ski! Collin accompanies us with rotating rounds of ammunition to take down these tentacle brutes! We miss you, Treat Williams! “Now what?”

Action Jackson

Fri, 30 Jun 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Jericho “Action” Jackson (Carl Weathers) is a force to be reckoned with. Stay on his good side/stay out of his way. Coach (Craig T. Nelson) runs some shady, illegal automotive activities before he becomes the coach. Sydney Ash (Vanity) loves drugs! She simply loves them! Patrice (Sharon Stone) just doesn’t get it. When you put it all together, you somehow have an action movie as big as Jackson’s biceps! Stay vigilant with RTS on the mean streets of Detroit. La-Mar and Jeremy join for an epic car in a house party. Gabe and Cheng make their Rabbit Troop Sucks debuts for street justice and explosions. Don’t lose an arm! If you do, you have a spare!

Surf Ninjas

Fri, 23 Jun 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Surfing? Sometimes! Ninjas? Yes! A magic Sega Game Gear and becoming the heirs of the kingdom of Patusan? Yes and yes! Johnny (Ernie Reyes Jr.) is about to turn 16. So, to make sure he becomes a teen father, it is arranged that he will marry Ro-May (Kelly Hu). Zatch (Ernie Reyes Sr.) blows up the family house! Whoops! Now everyone is homeless but magical. Johnny is accompanied by his younger brother Adam (Nicolas Cowan) and friend Iggy (Rob Schneider) to help take down the mechanical hand of Colonel Chi (Leslie Nielson) and his evil army. Come along with RTS on this ninja-tastic adventure. La-Mar and Collin join to take on this assault and bask in the island’s sun. Where did Tone Loc go?

Grandma's Boy

Fri, 16 Jun 2023 06:00:00 +0000

You’re kicked to the street because your roommate has been spending your rent money on “massages.” Serious bummer! Alex (Allen Covert) is in this exact situation. Now, desperately trying to find a place to live, building a work romance with Samantha (Linda Cardellini), satisfying his Zen boss Mr. Cheezle (Kevin Nealon) and creating his own video game, Alex’s life is chaotic. RTS enjoys the witty banter and video game-themed horseplay all along the way. Collin makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut to shut down JP (Joel David Moore) and his robo-voiced nonsense. JP will never get his metal legs! Maybe he should invest in karate monkeys and lions. Or, get tofu cakes with Shiloh! Roll those thoughts up and smoke ‘em.

The Great Yokai War

Fri, 09 Jun 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Moving to a small town can be tough. Becoming the chosen one, a “Kirin Rider,” to defeat evil is a whole new level of responsibility. Was this part of the family’s relocation agreement? Tadashi (Ryunosuke Kamiki) has a lot on his hands and that includes the thigh of the River Princess (Seiko Iwaido). Don’t worry, it will make sense in context. Maybe! RTS learn a lot more about Japanese folklore in this episode. Lucor joins on this mission to destroy evil! Have fun with mystical creatures, spirit hangouts, eyeball screen doors, and Agi (Chiaki Kuriyama) skillfully slicing down all that is good. Make sure you have azuki beans! Also, help us adopt a sunekosuri!

Manborg

Fri, 02 Jun 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Join RTS for our 50^th episode! Thank you for listening! Man! Borg! He is a Manborg! This film is nothing but the sweet nectar of awesomeness! Do yourself a favor and watch this film beforehand. The members of Astron-6 deliver a delightful borgy story of a brother’s love and learning the true meaning of family – and heaven. Manborg (Matthew Kennedy) woke up in a box and life is confusing! Help him! Try your best to bewitch The Baron (Jeremy Gillespie). Pop in a future cassette with Doctor Scorpius (Adam Brooks). Escape the demon hordes with Justice (Conor Sweeney), Mina (Meredith Sweeney) and #1 Man (Ludwig Lee). The human uprising begins here! La-Mar and Lucor join in and cut through the shenanigrams. “To the death, please.”

No Escape

Fri, 26 May 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Sometimes you get dumped off on a prison island to die. Robbins (Ray Liotta) is just not having it. He’s not having it at his job! He’s not having it with the warden! He’s not having it with Marek (Stuart Wilson) and his gang! Even though The Father (Lance Henriksen) and Hawkins (Ernie Hudson) tell ‘Liottes’ that there is no escape, he’s not having it! Come along with RTS for this Lord of the Flies-esque romp. Jeremy returns for this epic jungle jam, but which camp is he on? Will he share resources? Between the homebrewed booze, visiting the “Wet Dream” and the lack of showering, it’s just like the summer camp you remember as a kid!

The Faculty

Fri, 19 May 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Robert Rodriguez has assembled true villainy. Jean Grey of the X-Men (Famke Janssen), the former host of the Daily Show (Jon Stewart), and T2 (Robert Patrick) are led by Principal Drake (Bebe Neuwirth) to take down earth, eliminate human shenanigans and to consume massive amounts of water. The new late 90s Breakfast Club needs to put a stop to this! Join RTS as they team up with Elijah Wood, Jordana Brewster, Josh Hartnett and others representing their cliques to end this stream of bad education! We have to turn these things into the frothy goo they deserve! Teen drug lab to the rescue! And, there is always time for romance! Listen, muffin, if they don’t bodysnatch you, you are probably going to have an enjoyable time!

Wing Commander

Fri, 12 May 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Watch out who you call a “Pilgrim” around these parts. Lt. Blair (Freddy Prinze Jr.) is a bit hot and cold with that topic. But, he does have a fist-sized necklace for proof of his heritage. Lt. ‘Manic’ (Matthew Lillard) is doing some Lillard things in ships. Lt. ‘Angel’ (Saffron Burrows) is also a bit hot and cold with our lead. Maybe this is a space attitude thing. Maybe these space soldiers are strange because of the cat creatures coming for them. Also, the crew believes no one existed in the past. There is also someone trying to claim the callsign for ‘Paladin’. We can’t have that! Make the space jump you may or may not regret! Join RTS as they jettison all notions they had on space and the future of cat monsters.

Never Too Young to Die

Fri, 05 May 2023 06:00:00 +0000

There is only one spy group pool to pull from. You guessed it! We need all the high school agents! RTS are back into some spy game fun. Lance Stargrove (John Stamos) is just a regular kid who lives in a mansion with tapestries. His spy father (George Lazenby), now deceased, must be avenged. Danja (Vanity) makes time for shootouts and some disrobing peak-a-boo. Meanwhile, Velvet Von Ragnar (Gene Simmons) is trying to poison everyone’s drinking water. It’s been kind of a weird day. It’s convenient that this highschooler has his own theme song – it will grow on you! La-Mar joins in for the adventures of this spy-gymnast. In your heart, you know that Uncle Jesse can do no wrong!

Vice Versa

Fri, 28 Apr 2023 06:00:00 +0000

RTS take a trip to Chicago (and sometimes Thailand) to get a glimpse into the struggling family life of Marshall (Judge Reinhold) and Charlie (Fred Savage). They might not be seeing eye-to-eye, but once a magic Tibetan skull is in the mix, there will be growth in empathic perspectives. Sam (Corinne Bohrer) will become the adhesive needed to make this work. The Judge is dealing out his verdict – which is all body swap mayhem! You know the story – why keep low when you can create pandemonium all along the way!? Jeremy makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut for this ancient eccentricity. Sooner or later maybe your dad will stop dumping on you! Maybe! Only your department store drum skills can help you now!

How High

Fri, 21 Apr 2023 06:00:00 +0000

You never know who you might need to dig up. Obtaining one’s power happens in many ways and through many mysterious means – smoking them might be preferable. RTS peers through the haze with Silas (Method Man) and Jamal (Red Man) to get some sweet ghost powers from Ivory (Chuck Deezy). Harvard is demanding and these students need to spirit blunt themselves to the top – or at least to a position where they can stay in school. Join in on the fun when the main characters decide to dig up, grind and smoke John Quincy Adams! You better do it quick because Baby Powder (Mike Epps) is powdering up his slapping hand! Celebrate this 420 weekend the proper way! Smoke a dead president or a friend! Become the “popcorn playa.”

King Solomon's Mines

Fri, 14 Apr 2023 06:00:00 +0000

There will be no whips or spiritual artifacts where you are venturing off to. But, you will be given reminders of Indiana Jones all throughout this film. RTS tags along with treasure hunter and adventurer Allan Quatermain (Richard Chamberlain) in search of Jesse’s (Sharon Stone) father and the road to riches. Maybe the real treasure is in their hearts. Colonel Bockner (Herbert Lom) and Dogati (John Rhys-Davies) have some devious, murderous plans of their own if they can keep it together. Sometimes it’s hard to find a diamond mine that everyone knows about. Sometimes it's easy to find a plane and all the supplies you need. Sometimes you have to swallow the jewels instead of running them.

Ghost Ship

Fri, 07 Apr 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Welcome to the ghost boat! RTS join a team of salvagers – led by Murphy (Gabriel Byrne) to explore a lost passenger ship from 1962. It’s not all fun and games on the Bering Sea. Epps (Julianna Margulies) takes a nice stroll to the boat’s pool. Dodge (Ron Eldard) and Munder (Karl Urban) enjoy some delicious culinary delights. Greer (Isaiah Washington) enjoys a song. And, Emily Browning creeps around! We welcome back La-Mar and Rami. Also, Lucor makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut. There will be ample amounts of ghost gold rats and soul collecting! There is a mystery within this floating ghost box! See ya in the captain’s quarters!

Ninja Busters

Fri, 31 Mar 2023 06:00:00 +0000

If your plan is to tell everyone that you trained Bruce Lee or trained with him and have no martial arts skills, it’s a bad plan! Luckily, our beaten down protagonists, Chic (Sid Campbell) and Bernie (Eric Lee), are willing to train to the max! This improves their relationship status with women and their self-esteem. Sonny (Frank Navarro) will team up after accepting a three-year challenge. And once we have the entire team assembled, mob bosses running rusty warehouses in junkyards will stand no chance! We hope this kind of bustin’ makes you feel good! RTS could use a Tina back massage!

Prayer of the Rollerboys

Fri, 24 Mar 2023 06:00:00 +0000

RTS might be at home in dystopian futures. Enter Griffin (Corey Haim). He has established himself since he was eight years old (or before). He’s got all the moves, but he doesn’t have the world currency needed to make a better life for himself and his down-to-mist brother, Miltie (Devin Clark). Gary Lee (Christopher Collet) might have solutions. Friendship like this is everlasting. Casey (Patricia Arquette) has many outfits and many secrets – can she be trusted? Can she be seduced? Can’t we have it all? Also, did you know that during most of this movie the characters are on rollerblades? It’s that kind of future! Sara makes her Rabbit Troop Sucks debut just in time to meet Speedbagger and Bango! Also, enjoy a slice of some “boss kelp” pizza.

Irish Jam

Fri, 17 Mar 2023 06:00:00 +0000

Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Join RTS on a journey to find the most delicious green jam in all of the land. Wait!? That doesn’t seem right. This is more about Jimmy (Eddie Griffin) who wins a poetry contest and a bar in Ireland. This village and Jimmy have a lot to learn from each other. Even if Euros are owed, love could be in the air. Also, nets will be thrown! La-Mar joins us for the magic of Ireland and to hang with the “Jam-Man.” You better believe that you will figure out who’s buttering your bread by the end of this film.

Six-String Samurai

Fri, 10 Mar 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Thank you to Kara for this listener request. This film has a bit of everything. Rockabilly and surf rock set the stage for this unique adventure in an alt-universe where Russia has nuked and taken over the U.S. RTS joins Buddy (Jefferey Falcon) as he makes his way to “Lost Vegas” to become the successor to Elvis. This 90s world needs a new king! But a kid melting hearts and death and his metal horsemen might cause a few delays. If you aren’t shredding, you need to be slashing! Sometimes both! Stay good lookin’ and avoid ALL spinach monsters!

Flashback

Fri, 03 Mar 2023 07:00:00 +0000

John Buckner (Kiefer Sutherland) is finally bringing radical Huey Walker (Dennis Hopper) to jail. But, Walker’s hippy way of thinking might just bring out the past in John. RTS will be with you on a long, long train ride. We get to see Union Station! You’ll be delighted as the ever-charming Carol Kane and her unfortunate character Maggie suck your soul out with an endless Time Life Classics-esque montage of the 60s. The soundtrack might make up for it. We really need to read Huey’s book already! Tie-dye forever!

Wildcats

Fri, 24 Feb 2023 07:00:00 +0000

At the beginning of the year, we received a listener request. Thank you, Hillary! RTS have a view from the sidelines as Goldie Hawn kills it as a newly appointed football coach getting a bunch of inner-city Chicago high schoolers into shape. See the film debuts of Wesley Snipes and Woody Harrelson. Sip on spiked punch with Robyn Lively! Have some cake with Finch (Tab Thacker). Find out why Frank (James Keach) and Coach Dan (Bruce McGill) are the worst! La-Mar and Nemo are here to tackle the opponents with some rough and tumble hilarity. Have a good time! In the words of Nipsey Russell, “righhhhht.”

Miami Connection

Fri, 17 Feb 2023 07:00:00 +0000

How hard are you rocking out to Dragon Sound? You aren’t rockin’ as hard as you can or should be! They just want to be your friends forever. Integrity? Loyalty? Honesty? This martial arts band has it all. When they aren’t fighting ninjas and crime syndicates in Florida, they are studying for the big exam – in what? We do not know. RTS have front row tickets for this rock-fueled battle royale. Are you as awesome as Y.K. Kim? Are you “against the ninja”?

If Looks Could Kill

Fri, 10 Feb 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Get ready for Valentine’s Day! La-Mar joins us to go undercover on this top secret and academic mission. Pass high school and save the world. A fun story as old as time. Get ready for Michael Corben (Richard Grieco) and his smoldering antics! But, you don’t need any secret weapons when you have “bitchin’ wheels” and Mariska (Gabrielle Anwar) to hang around with. RTS doesn’t want to break any hearts, but Roger Daltrey may not make it back for another mission. Follow “The French Teacher” and listen to “Mother.” Avoid scorpion dances and anyone telling you they will “nail your ass to the wall.”

The First Power

Fri, 03 Feb 2023 07:00:00 +0000

You have been warned about the first power! Also, what!? How many powers are there? Lou Diamond Phillips gets a crash course on demonic powers as he investigates a serial killer that continues the body count even after death. We have psychic predictions, getting “horoscoped,” Sister Marguerite brandishing a Jesus blade, a horse trampling, roof jumping from a 10-story building, a spinning ceiling fan of death, floating taunts and more! RTS narrowly escapes possession for this horror-thriller. What did Easy E feel about it all?

A Boy and His Dog

Fri, 27 Jan 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Vic (Don Johnson) has a telepathic link with his dog. That’s cool! That should help after the fallout of WWIV. Note: RTS has standing invites for any and all talking and/or telepathic animals to join us. Between the lack of popcorn for Blood, the night porn arcade, the Screamers, the endless walking and hiding and the need for food, Vic has a lot on his hands. Quilla June (Susanne Benton) enters the scene and has secret plans of her own. You know things are getting bad when you must face the clown council! Oh, Jason Robards, how did this all happen?

The Seventh Curse

Fri, 20 Jan 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Happy Lunar New Year! It’s the year of the rabbit! Rabbit Troop? Follow your heart on this! Also, follow Chow Yun-Fat. He might have a yacht you can party on. RTS teams up with Dr. Yuan to cure himself of a recently forgotten blood curse – you know those are the worst. Get naked in a river! Fight off the Worm tribe. Be besties with Dragon. Deal with a high-octave vocal sorcerer dousing a coffin in blood. Wait until “old ancestor” demands rhymes – and death! Hong Kong cinema, you have it all!

Nomads

Fri, 13 Jan 2023 07:00:00 +0000

Dr. Eileen Flax is having a terrible day. Is it as terrible as Pierce Brosnan’s French accent? Only you can decide! RTS are in on this anthropological study on Adam Ant’s goth van gang! They’re van people! They’re demons? They’re a bunch of goody two shoes!? Is “crawl metal” a thing? Is this how you make the leap to Predator and Die Hard? It’s all about perspective. Bon, bon!

Night Vision

Fri, 06 Jan 2023 07:00:00 +0000

We are back in Denver while being in Denver! RTS joins Andy on his adventures of writing, exploring, crying during sex and learning about himself. Remember renting movies? Remember the satanic rituals you would rent at Video One? Jill does! Tell us more about the director Michael Krueger! La-Mar is back with us to kick off the new year! Maybe you’d like to share a vision with us. A night vision!

Miracle Mile

Fri, 30 Dec 2022 07:00:00 +0000

The year is ending! Flashbacks and brief overdubbed narratives aside, the world is going to end too! Will RTS make it to the new year? What would you do if you answered a phone call at a payphone where someone told you the world was going to end? Also, where is the closest payphone? Anthony Edwards is that person! La-Mar is also a person! He joins us on our adventure into the end of the world. Or is it? Someone should tell us something. Let’s celebrate together! What are you into?

Rare Exports

Fri, 23 Dec 2022 07:00:00 +0000

Happy Holidays, everyone! La-Mar joins us for this Christmas trek into the Korvatunturi Mountains. Our friend Rami makes his RTS debut! Grab a hot mug of coco, let a snowflake melt on your tongue, snuggle up and hide your children because Santa’s helpers are rounding up your children in preparation for the Santa excavation. This holiday episode is full of fun and surprises. RTS wishes you a safe and demon free holiday season. If you are lucky, maybe next year you will receive the town cranberry.

Deadly Games: Dial Code Santa Claus

Fri, 16 Dec 2022 07:00:00 +0000

36.15 Code Père Noël! Game Over! There is a lot going on in this film! When you live in a lair, you are going to run into some complications – holiday complications. La-Mar joins us on our first non-English film. RTS wants to talk to you about it on your local BBS. Some crazy Santa comes for young Thomas and Papy, and that guy is going to get what he deserves! Join us for secret passages, a computer lab worthy of Batman, infinite wealth and toys, a room for all occasions, and much more! “Happy Birthday, Christmas!”

Xtro

Fri, 09 Dec 2022 07:00:00 +0000

Is this about an alien? An extra-dimensional being? Some solar jerk? Who knows? This entity is on a mission to impregnate everyone in the area. RTS suggest that you consider moving, even if your cottage is a sweet mansion. Sam is going to be abducted and then explodes back into the scene. Rachel is going to be into it. Analise is going to be nude a lot. Tony is going to be covered in blood. And, Joe is going to be taking photos. It’s the all British family! Politely deny all face hugs and accept their tea.

Black Roses

Fri, 02 Dec 2022 07:00:00 +0000

The music of Black Roses is going to grow on you! RTS is already invested in their message. Soon, all of the town’s teens will be part of the message as well – something about being the evil flower and true followers. We don’t really know. They do have a rad drummer and a bunch of He-Man and Road Warrior villains in the band! And, if the music isn’t entertaining, you are always able to join in a game of Strip Gin with Mr. Miller and Tina! Have a glass of milk with Damian. Teach isn’t having any of it! “I am for real. You don’t know what I feel. My strength is in my will.

Grabbers

Fri, 25 Nov 2022 07:00:00 +0000

There are only a couple of rules on this island off the coast of Ireland. First, O’shea is gonna drink! Second, grabbers gonna grab! If you can live with that (or attempt to live), you are going to have a fun time! RTS celebrates this Black Friday with you by giving you a glimpse of what you will need for the holiday season, a stiff drink or six. When aliens want to suck your blood, give them a dose of your alcohol-filled life juice! If you can! Even Garda Lisa can’t keep it together with this much booze!

Welcome to the Jungle

Fri, 18 Nov 2022 07:05:00 +0000

You asked for it! We think you did! It’s a Van-demption! Let Jean-Claude Van Damme lead you and your company retreat into a jungle! RTS learns the true JCVD story here! There will be a tiger too! Between the company’s drug-fueled orgies, nap times and pure chaos led by Rob Huebel, Adam Brody is having a hard time getting to know Megan Boone. Even though everything has gone awry, it doesn’t mean there won’t be fun! Tiger fun and hiding in shame.

In Hell

Fri, 11 Nov 2022 07:00:00 +0000

Tournament fights? No! Prison fights and beatings? Yes! There is a lot of hardship in this prison for Jean-Claude Van Damme. He does become besties with a moth, so we have that! Lawrence Taylor will narrate many-a situations to keep it all together. La-Mar joins us on this voyage In Hell. RTS will avoid messing around with JCVD. There is too much Van-damage! Don’t forget, you’re messing around with Van-dingo!

Project: Metalbeast

Fri, 04 Nov 2022 06:00:00 +0000

If you develop a plan to inject yourself with werewolf blood, it’s a bad plan! RTS goes on a scavenger hunt for werewolves. Are you going to play a drinking game for werewolf appearances? Well, you are going to be sober by the end of this film. Why does all the synthetic skin have to turn hard? Why is the soundtrack so epic? Why is Barry Bostwick so mean? You might want to join Debbie for that glass of vodka!

The Midnight Hour

Mon, 31 Oct 2022 06:00:00 +0000

It’s Halloween! Happy Halloween from RTS! We take a look at this made for TV film from the 80’s! The lead, Phil (Lee Montgomery), wins Halloween costume of the year! Who doesn’t want to fall in love with a dead cheerleader? This soundtrack is killer (all puns intended)! LeVar Burton does not read you any books! Where is our invite to the Pitchfork Cove Halloween shindig? Always invite witches! La-Mar and Nemo join for this RTS Halloween spooktacular episode that includes thrown candy and plenty of trivia.

The Sentinel

Fri, 28 Oct 2022 06:00:00 +0000

This is our first listener suggestion! Thank you, Andy, for your recommendation. Alison (Cristina Raines) just wants to live her best life in New York in her infinitely large apartment. A bunch of ghost creeps have other plans for her! What secrets does a blind recluse priest hold? Is Ava Gardner your real estate agent? Is Jerry Orbach directing your wine commercial? Is Jeff Goldblum unbuttoning one too many of his own shirt buttons? RTS would still live in a haunted house for the low cost of $400 dollars a month. Dream or no dream, you will never forget Burgess Meredith’s kitty cat’s birthday party!

Trick or Treat

Fri, 21 Oct 2022 06:00:00 +0000

Start playing your vinyl recordings backwards. That’s the only way you are going to get the real answers you have been looking for. Also, you’ll get to summon and meet a legendary rocker, Sammi Curr! Don’t blame RTS, Marc Price did it! Also, when are we all going to this pool party we have heard about? Leslie invited us. Is that cool? Gene Simmons is Nuke! Ozzy Osbourne is a reverend! Don’t get sucked into rock’s messages! Why can’t these crispy demon rockers ever play it cool? Wait, this does seem cool. What are these messages?

TerrorVision

Fri, 14 Oct 2022 14:00:00 +0000

Attention! Listen to the alien on your television! It’s warning you! But, if you don’t pay attention to that in your pleasure den or dome, then you have options. Fancy a drink made by Spiro? Want to hang out in a basement bunker and eat some lizard tails? Swing with mom and dad? O.D. will share his musical genius with you. Suzy, run while you can! RTS needs your alien satellite feed! There are whispers of some of the haunted places in Denver. If the ghosts don’t get you, the aliens will.

Spookies

Fri, 07 Oct 2022 06:00:00 +0000

A man jumps through a wooden door! Is there anything else to know? Probably! What plans did that kid have? How many people are driving around? Why is someone’s dad hanging with these kids? Why are these people here? How long does it take until you become a mansion creep? Isabelle deserves so much better! RTS has many questions about this film. Also, bring back ALL the episodes of Are You Afraid of the Dark?!

Fortress

Fri, 30 Sep 2022 06:00:00 +0000

Play it cool at the border! RTS warned you! You are now taking a grand tour of the fortress you’ll be staying in forever. Chris makes his RTS debut within this underground prison! La-Mar joins us as well. This is the most action-packed crowd RTS has recorded. If anyone else joined, we would be taken to the fortress! But Kirkwood Smith would be our companion. So, that’s cool! And, there are many Christopher Lambert laughing impressions. Try not to intestinate anyone!

Trancers

Fri, 23 Sep 2022 06:00:00 +0000

The future seems bleak! When coffee is “going to cost you,” RTS would leave that future too! Rico makes his RTS debut to analyze a story about time traveling Jack Deth. The main character is named JACK DETH! Helen Hunt is into it! The Trancer franchise begins here! You think you know someone and sometimes they just turn into a “trancer.” That’s a real squid move!

Double Dragon

Fri, 16 Sep 2022 06:00:00 +0000

What kind of ancient Chinese talisman do you have? Our friend Nemo makes her RTS debut to discuss this and a hunky boy smokeshow. Do you want to join Power Corps? Probably not! Whips, fists and mystic powers! 90’s attire and night gangs. Just another night on the town – especially for the Lee brothers. Will Bo Abobo eventually go on Iron Chef? Robert Patrick becomes a samurai demon. What do these gangs do during the day?

Martin & Orloff

Fri, 09 Sep 2022 06:00:00 +0000

The dangers of wearing an eggroll costume are revealed. Warn the spareribs! If you have a mayonnaise face, RTS will tell you, friend. La-Mar joins in on the analysis of the analyst. Leave the children’s backpacks out of this! Avoid bathroom sinks! Are you willing to join the Mint Julep Club? Also, “this is going to be good for you.”

Brainscan

Fri, 02 Sep 2022 06:00:00 +0000

RTS are jealous over Edward Furlong’s sweet pad! Outdated technology! Yes, please! Games sent to players in the mail! 4 discs to rule them all! Love is when you and your neighbor spy on one another! There’s the Trickster and metal! How many witnesses are there? So, there are more witnesses? Okay, we know this game! More witnesses!

Highway to Hell

Mon, 29 Aug 2022 06:00:00 +0000

Chad Lowe is eloping with Kristy Swanson. Hell cop had nothing on Ben the dog! Orpheus and Dante meet the entire Stiller family! Did you think Beezle would be bad? What if his name was Dr. Satan? We also learn the quickest way to hell is sex, drugs and rock n’ roll. Hell cars! Hell portals! Hell cop! What the hell? RTS have a hell of a good time.

Freejack

Fri, 26 Aug 2022 06:00:00 +0000

Don’t Call RTS when you are freejackin’ it in San Diego! Mick Jagger is the best friend you could ever have! We have friends too! Our friend La-Mar is back! You do NOT want to be on the spiritual switchboard. Maybe you do. We don’t judge. Boone is simply the coolest! Estevez! Russo! Sir Hopkins! Buster Poindexter! Sherbet!

An Evening with Beverly Luff Lin

Fri, 19 Aug 2022 06:00:00 +0000

If you aren’t “feast[ing] on snacks” during this podcast, your loss! Gross drinks from Emile Hirsch! Aubrey Plaza lets in the “party man” and sells us on her broken heart. Why did Jermaine’s character get 14 candies from his grandmother? Adjay’s vegan “Grains of Paradise.” Craig Robinson is Scottish? Jacob Wysocki is hauntingly fabulous. Matt Berry should be in everything! RTS approves of all of this! But forget cousin Puney!

Disorderlies

Fri, 12 Aug 2022 06:00:00 +0000

Our friend La-Mar is back! Don’t make bad bets when you have The Fat Boys on the scene! Were they ordered to be the worst or the best? How many Miami gun rooms do you own? Ray Parker Jr. ninjas his way into this film! Shout out to Roller City! Inspired by The Fat Boys, RTS discuss their first video camera dance video. No!

Crimewave

Fri, 05 Aug 2022 06:00:00 +0000

Does Sam Raimi know he did this film? RTS does not know. $36 dollar dance contests! After a tussle, women in ornate scarves come to the rescue in Denver. The day Roger Rabbit died. Highspeed chases and highspeed nuns. Did Bruce Campbell say this movie “escaped”? Was he right? EXTRA! EXTRA! What is going on?

Our friend Michael Dooley stops by and plays us a song.

“Peaceful High Below” written and performed by Michael Dooley.

https://www.facebook.com/michaeldooleyproject/

Ping Pong Summer

Fri, 29 Jul 2022 06:00:00 +0000

We have our first guest! Our friend La-Mar makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut. Together, RTS goes on an epic summer vacation with Ping Pong Summer! Have you been filling your slushed iced drinks to the top? Have you had a breakdance battle? Where is your smorgasbord of food? Does “sorry” only count in church? Do you even know Tedwardo?

She's Out of Control

Fri, 22 Jul 2022 06:00:00 +0000

This movie is out of control! Find out Siskel and Ebert’s hate! Meet a young Matthew Perry. Join RTS and their discussions of this strange tale. Also, Alyssa Milano does not play Tony Danza’s daughter, and that is the biggest crime of them all.

Phantoms

Fri, 15 Jul 2022 06:00:00 +0000

It’s our first episode! Welcome to Rabbit Troop Sucks! Join co-hosts Paul and Mike on their first podcasting adventure with Phantoms! There are discussions of Georgetown, Colorado and fun things to do there! Also, there are phantoms! “Hey, you want to see somethin’?”

American Rickshaw

Fri, 15 Jul 2022 06:00:00 +0000

All RTS needed to know is that there is an ancient Chinese witch. Boat sex? An Olympian medalist too? How is there even time for rickshaw-ing?