Helping Couples Heal Podcast

102. Women Betray Too

Fri, 27 Mar 2026 00:29:15 +0000

In this episode, Marnie talks with Patty, a female betrayer, and Judith Nisenson, a betrayal trauma coach, to confront the often-ignored reality that women betray too. They dive deep into the unique patterns of female betrayal, the emotional drivers behind it, and the specific challenges women face when seeking recovery in a field traditionally focused on male betrayers.

The conversation explores:

Patty’s personal story: A brave and vulnerable account of a lifelong pattern of betrayal, from early childhood emotional detachment and teenage sexual trauma to two marriages and a secret sexual basement.
The nuances of female infidelity: Judith discusses why women's reasons for cheating often differ from men's, highlighting themes of emotional neglect, a lack of self-identity, and the chameleon effect of morphing to fit others' expectations.
The double standard of shame: A discussion on the societal and "Scarlet Letter" stigmas that create an extra layer of isolation and self-loathing for female betrayers.
A roadmap to recovery: Vital resources for healing are shared, including 12-step programs (SAA, SLAA) and specialized coaching groups.

Whether you are a woman or a man, a betrayer seeking to understand your own patterns or a betrayed partner navigating the trauma of betrayal, this episode offers a compassionate and honest space for healing and hope.

Resources:

Helping Couples Heal Services: Click here to learn more about our ongoing coaching group for female betrayers.
Connect with Judith Nisenson: Visit womenswrk.com to learn more about Judith’s work with female betrayers.
Join a Coaching Group: Explore Judith’s eight-week curriculum-based coaching groups for women by clicking here.
Tune in to "Women Cheat Too": Check out Judith's podcast for bite-sized episodes on navigating female betrayal here.
Resources for Men: To learn more about the male betrayed partners group led by Adam (Judith’s husband), click here.
Want to connect with us? Click here to book your free 15-minute call

101. Beyond Talk Therapy: Life-Changing, Somatic Self-Care Practices With Gemini Adams

Tue, 17 Mar 2026 02:25:51 +0000

In this episode, Marnie welcomes back her friend and longtime collaborator, Gemini Adams, a renowned somatic practitioner. Together, they explore a missing piece of the healing journey that many couples overlook: the body. While traditional talk therapy is vital, Marnie and Gemini discuss why cognitive understanding often isn’t enough to move couples out of the painful, repetitive cycles of betrayal trauma.

Gemini shares her personal journey from living with the effects of complex PTSD and chronic conflict avoidance to finding what she calls "conflict confidence." They dive deep into the science of the nervous system, explaining why the betrayed partner is often "flooded" with sensation while the betrayer may be completely numb or dissociated.

This conversation is a foundational look at the tools needed to move out of survival mode and back into what Gemini calls the "Green Zone," the place where relational connection and empathy actually become possible again.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

The Power of Interception: Why many survivors lose the ability to feel their own physical needs and how to begin reconnecting with their body’s cues.
The Relational Nervous System: Why you literally cannot listen, retain information, or connect with your partner when you are in a state of fight, flight, or freeze.
Numbness vs. Flooding: How to understand the different trauma responses between the person who caused the harm and the person who was betrayed.
Building "Adult Self": How somatic skills help you stay grounded as an adult rather than being "ping-ponged" by inner-child survival responses.
Triggered to Together: An introduction to Marnie and Gemini’s new program designed to help couples manage triggers and crisis moments in real-time.

Click here to learn more about the upcoming 12-week Triggered to Together programs for couples and individuals.

Want to connect with us? Click here to schedule your free 15-minute call.

100. One Hundred Episodes of Hope

Wed, 04 Mar 2026 22:20:04 +0000

In this landmark 100th episode of Helping Couples Heal, we take a moment to pause and reflect on the journey that brought us here. Healing from betrayal is often a lonely, exhausting path, but for 100 conversations, we have walked it together. What started as a mission to bring clarity to the chaos of betrayal trauma has grown into a global community of resilient survivors and recovering couples. To celebrate our 100th episode, we’re going back to the "Why."

Join us as we revisit the original mission that sparked this podcast: to provide a lifeline for those drowning in the aftermath of betrayal and broken trust. We discuss what this milestone means for our community, the lessons learned along the way, and why our commitment to your healing remains stronger than ever. We also explore the core values that have guided Helping Couples Heal since day one and why the work of healing and restoration is more important today than ever before.

Whether you’ve been with us since Episode 1 or are just joining the journey, this episode is a dedication to your courage and a promise for the future of this show.

Want to connect with us? Click here to schedule your free 15-minute Zoom call.

99. The Other Side of Betrayal: The Ten Core Wounds of The One Who Betrayed

Tue, 10 Feb 2026 23:37:30 +0000

In December, I released a podcast called The Ten Core Wounds of Betrayal, which explored the deep and lasting wounds experienced by betrayed partners. In this follow-up episode, we turn toward the other side of the rupture - the often unseen and rarely discussed wounds carried by those who do the betraying.

This conversation is not about justifying or minimizing betrayal. Instead, it’s about understanding the internal landscape that often exists beneath betraying behavior. Drawing from clinical insight and relational patterns, this episode explores ten core wounds commonly experienced by people who betray - wounds that can show up in both men and women, while also acknowledging that some tend to appear more frequently in men due to socialization, attachment patterns, and emotional conditioning.

By naming these wounds - such as shame, emotional disconnection, unmet attachment needs, and identity fractures - we begin to see betrayal not as random or purely selfish, but as something that often emerges from unresolved internal pain. Understanding these wounds can be a powerful step toward accountability, empathy, and meaningful repair.

Whether you are a betrayed partner seeking clarity, someone who has betrayed and wants to understand yourself more deeply, or a couple navigating the long road of healing, this episode offers language, insight, and perspective to help move the conversation away from blame and toward connection, healing, and ultimately, transformation.

Click here to receive your free worksheet.

Want to connect with us? Click here to schedule your free 15-minute Zoom call.

98. The Long Road Back: One Couple's Journey Through Betrayal

Thu, 22 Jan 2026 17:20:57 +0000

In this episode, Marnie sits down with Scott and Laura, a couple who courageously share their journey of healing after betrayal. What followed Scott’s infidelity was not a quick fix or a straight path forward, but years marked by pain, rupture, and a slow, non-linear process of rebuilding trust and connection.

Together, Scott and Laura reflect on the early days after discovery - when fear, confusion, and disconnection felt overwhelming - and the hard truths they had to face along the way. Laura speaks openly about her struggle with boundaries and the painful realization that she had been tolerating more than she should have. Scott shares vulnerably about his own abandonment wounds, how they fueled a sense of righteousness, and the moment he recognized he was expecting Laura to carry pain that was his to heal.

They discuss the concrete steps that helped shift their relationship, including Scott joining a men’s group, learning to take responsibility for his emotional world, and the transformative impact of Imago dialogue. They also explore the power of couples recovery check-ins and the clarity that emerged through Laura’s second impact letter.

This conversation offers a hopeful and grounded look at what it takes to move from living in fear and survival to standing side-by-side in honesty, accountability, and connection. For anyone navigating the aftermath of betrayal trauma, this episode is a reminder that while healing is hard, it is possible.

Connect with us: Book a free 15-minute consultation call here.

97. Navigating Betrayal Anger with Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck

Tue, 13 Jan 2026 01:01:16 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie sits down with Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck, a therapist, trauma survivor, and author of Betrayal Trauma Anger: You’re Not Crazy, You’re Angry, and You Should Be. They explore a topic that is often misunderstood and shamed: the intense and very normal anger experienced by betrayed partners after betrayal.

For too long, the clinical field has labeled this anger as “vengeful” or “unforgiving.” Crystal helps us flip that narrative, showing why anger is a natural, healthy response to the profound injustice of betrayal and an important part of the healing journey.

In this episode, you will hear about:

Why anger is a natural response and how betrayal creates deep emotional and nervous system reactions
The S.C.I.P. Protocol, Crystal’s 4-step tool, Sit down, Calm down, Identify, and Process, for navigating triggers
Anger on the brain and why it is impossible to reason through a trigger when the amygdala is hijacked
Reframing for the partner who betrayed and how accountability, consistency, and presence can reduce ongoing anger
Moving toward repair and how seeing anger as a signal of wounding rather than a flaw supports connection and empathy

By reframing anger as a signal of wounding rather than a character flaw, couples can move from defensiveness to empathy, and from shame to true repair.

Click here to download Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck’s S.C.I.P. Protocol.

Click here to purchase Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck’s book, Betrayal Trauma Anger: You’re Not Crazy, You’re Angry, and You Should Be.

Want to connect with us? Click here to book your free 15-minute call.

96. Beyond Words: How Friends and Family Can Truly Support Betrayed Partners

Wed, 24 Dec 2025 02:40:49 +0000

In this deeply moving episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie is joined by four courageous women (Sabra, Ally, Liz, and Rachel) who vulnerably share their personal experiences navigating the aftermath of betrayal. Together, they explore a critical but often overlooked aspect of the healing journey: the complex role of friends and family.

The group discusses the universal need for external support and the painful reality that loved ones often don't know what to say or how to show up effectively. From the impulse to retreat and isolate to the trauma of being judged by those closest to them, these women highlight the delicate balance between needing a "safe place to land" and requiring firm boundaries to protect their own healing process.

Key topics in this conversation include:

The Grey Area of Discovery: Why betrayed partners often withdraw from social circles while trying to make sense of their shattered reality.
The Burden of the Fixer: How the well-intentioned advice of friends, like telling a partner to just leave, can often add to the trauma rather than alleviate it.
Connection with Boundaries: Defining what safe support looks like, from the power of a meal train to the simple, profound act of sitting in silence.
The Role of Support Groups: How finding a community of others who get it becomes a lifeline when family and friends fall short.

Whether you are currently navigating betrayal trauma or you are a loved one seeking to support someone you care about, this episode provides essential insights into moving from judgment to empathy and from isolation to authentic connection.

Download the Do's and Don'ts Guide for Family & Friends here!

Want to connect with us? Click here to schedule your free 15-minute call.

95. The Ten Core Wounds of Betrayal

Wed, 10 Dec 2025 00:20:07 +0000

When betrayal enters a relationship, it doesn’t just break trust - it fractures a person’s sense of self, safety, and connection. In this episode, we explore the ten core wounds that betrayed partners often experience, each one carrying its own story and its own emotional truth:

Worthiness Wound – “I’m not enough.”
Safety Wound – “I’m not safe.”
Reality Wound – “I can’t trust myself.”
Control Wound – “I have to manage everything.”
Belonging Wound – “I’m alone in this.”
Burden Wound – “I have to carry everything.”
Abandonment Wound – “You’ll leave me.”
Inadequacy Wound – “I’m not as good as what I was betrayed with.”
Powerlessness Wound – “I didn’t have a choice.”
Trust Wound – “Trust is dangerous.”

Each wound reveals a different layer of the emotional devastation betrayal creates - and each one shapes how betrayed partners think, feel, and try to protect themselves in the aftermath.

In this episode, Marnie breaks down what these wounds look like in real life, how they impact day-to-day interactions, and why healing them requires understanding, patience, and consistent repair. We also talk directly to betrayers, offering a compassionate but honest framework for recognizing the impact of their actions and supporting their partner’s healing journey.

This episode is an invitation to move beyond surface reactions and into the deeper emotional landscape of betrayal - where clarity, empathy, and repair become possible. This episode is an invitation to move beyond surface reactions and into the deeper emotional landscape of betrayal - where clarity, empathy, and repair become possible.

Click here to download your free worksheet. This worksheet walks both partners through all ten wounds, helping identify which ones are active, how they’re showing up, and what healing might require.

Want to connect with us? Click here to schedule your free 15-minute call.

Visit our website to learn more about Empowered at Sea and Empowered on Land.

94. Finding The Way Through with Jeanne Vattuone and Tim Stein

Tue, 04 Nov 2025 05:12:03 +0000

In this episode, Marnie sits down with two of her colleagues from Northern California, Jeanne Vattuone and Tim Stein to talk about Finding The Way Through, their new workbook designed to integrate sobriety, recovery, and betrayed partner sensitivity into the healing process.

Purchase the workbook Finding the Way Through: A Workbook for Sex and Pornography Addiction here!

Click here to join The Healing Room.

Want to connect? Click here to book your free 15-minute call.

93. Unscripted Truths: A Candid Conversation with Dr. Omar Minwalla

Mon, 20 Oct 2025 21:50:04 +0000

In what was originally intended to be a structured discussion on “The Ten Steps to Constructing the Secret Sexual Basement,” this episode took an unexpected and deeply personal turn. Instead, I’m joined by Dr. Omar Minwalla for a raw, unfiltered conversation that traces the arc of our individual and shared professional journeys.

What unfolds is a rare, intimate glimpse into the foundation of a long-standing friendship - one built on mutual respect, hard truths, and a shared commitment to integrity, even when it’s uncomfortable or controversial. We talk openly about what it means to stay committed to telling the truth, to each other and to the work, despite pushback or disagreement.

This was never meant to be a public conversation - but by the end, we both felt that what emerged was too meaningful not to share. I believe listeners will find resonance, insight, and maybe even a sense of companionship and loyalty in the honesty of this exchange.

Dr. Minwalla will be back soon and hopefully next time we’ll get to the secret basement. Until then, this is something different… and maybe more important.

Want to connect with us? Schedule your free 15-minute call here.

92. Honoring Your Grief Without Letting It Define You

Mon, 06 Oct 2025 21:08:04 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie explores the delicate balance of grief and hope in couples working to heal after betrayal. She shares why grief must be honored - not rushed, bypassed, or minimized - and how acknowledging the depth of loss is an essential step toward authentic healing. At the same time, Marnie reminds us that grief does not have to define your whole story. By integrating grief into the narrative of your relationship, you create space for resilience, growth, and new possibilities. This episode offers a compassionate invitation to couples: you can carry grief and hope side by side, honoring what was lost while also making room for what can still be built.

Schedule your free 15-minute call

Want more information on our Workshops? Click Here.

Get your free reflection guide to go along with this episode here!

91. Still Becoming: Chandler Rogers on Recovery, Marriage, and Growth (Part 2)

Mon, 08 Sep 2025 20:39:53 +0000

In this continuation of our conversation with Chandler Rogers, we dive deeper into his journey of recovery from pornography addiction and the ongoing challenges of healing within his marriage. Chandler shares honestly about what it means to keep showing up in the work of recovery—not just for himself, but for his relationship—and how hope can grow even in the midst of setbacks.

We also explore Chandler’s powerful decision to create Relay, an app designed to fill in the gaps he saw in traditional recovery support. Relay was born out of his own experience and the recognition that people struggling with addiction need consistent accountability, connection, and encouragement outside of therapy or group sessions.

Chandler's story is an important reminder that Recovery is ongoing. Healing from porn and sex addiction isn’t a one-time choice—it’s a daily practice of showing up for yourself and your relationship. This episode offers inspiration, practical insight, and a reminder that healing—both personally and in a marriage—is possible when we’re willing to reach for support and keep leaning into growth.

Want to Learn more about Relay? Click here

Connect with us by booking a free 15-minute call!

90. From Regression to Repair: Continuing the Conversation with Jon Lee

Tue, 26 Aug 2025 19:45:31 +0000

In this follow-up conversation with therapist and author Jon Lee, we continue our deep dive into emotional regression and its profound impact on couples recovering from betrayal. Building on the foundation we laid in Part 1, Jon and I explore how regression shows up in relationships—when intense pain, fear, or shame pulls partners back into younger emotional states that can feel overwhelming and destabilizing.

We discuss the ways regression complicates communication, trust-building, and repair, and how it can create cycles of disconnection even when both partners desperately want to heal. Jon offers clinical insight and compassionate strategies for recognizing regression in real time, staying grounded, and learning how to respond to one another with empathy instead of reactivity.

Whether you’re a betrayed partner, a person working to rebuild integrity, or a couple navigating the aftermath together, this episode provides tools and perspective to help you move toward connection rather than getting stuck in regressed patterns.

Want to connect with us? Click here to book a free 15-minute call.

89. Relapse, Repair, and Growth with Chandler Rogers (part 1)

Tue, 29 Jul 2025 22:15:18 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie sits down with Chandler Rogers, a recovering porn addict and the founder of Relay, a group-based recovery app designed to support those on their healing journey. Chandler shares his personal story of seeking help for his addiction long before it was discovered—a rare and powerful experience that sheds light on the strength it takes to face the truth head-on.

He opens up about the vulnerability it required to be honest with his now-wife early in their relationship, the ups and downs of recovery, and the reality that honesty doesn’t erase the ongoing struggles. Chandler reflects on moments of setback, the weight of shame, and the vital role that connection, accountability, and personal ownership have played not only in his healing but also in inspiring him to create a community where others can find hope and support. Also, be sure to catch Marnie's conversation with Scott and Susan Rankin just before the podcast starts about the HCH Online Couples Community, a supportive space designed for deep connection and healing, opening its doors to a small group of couples this September.

Click here to schedule your free 15-minute call

88. Sober Doesn't Mean Safe

Thu, 03 Jul 2025 19:55:43 +0000

In this episode, Marnie unpacks a critical truth in the betrayal recovery process: sexual sobriety is not the same as relational healing. In other words, just because the acting out has stopped doesn’t mean the relationship is safe or healing. In fact, ongoing emotional / integrity abuse can re-traumatize a betrayed partner.

Marnie explores why emotional sobriety is just as essential as sexual sobriety, and what it really takes to rebuild trust and connection after betrayal. A betrayed partner needs emotional safety, not just behavioral changes. Trust isn’t rebuilt by abstinence — it’s rebuilt by transparency, accountability, and empathy.

Simply stopping problematic sexual behaviors (porn, affairs, acting out) does not address the underlying relational damage caused by betrayal. True healing involves rebuilding the foundation of the relationship.

If you've ever said or heard "But I'm sober...”, this conversation is for you.

87. Growing Yourself Back Up: Understanding Emotional Regression with author John Lee

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 20:14:04 +0000

In this powerful and eye-opening conversation, Marnie sits down with renowned author and therapist John Lee, whose classic book Growing Yourself Back Up has helped thousands understand the profound impact of emotional regression on adult relationships.

Together, we explore what emotional regression is and how it silently shapes our reactions, the difference between responding as an empowered adult vs. a wounded child, and how identifying your own triggers and patterns of regression can create healthier relationships.

We introduce practical tools for recognizing when you’ve been “emotionally hijacked” and how to avoid relational ruptures in those moments. Perhaps most important, we discuss the importance of developing the necessary awareness and compassion that can break cycles of blame, withdrawal, fighting, and relational despair.

If you’ve ever wondered why certain moments with your partner (or any loved ones) trigger outsize reactions or why the wounds of betrayal take over in the heat of conflict - this conversation is for you.

Learning how to spot and shift emotional regression is one of the most empowering skills we can develop—for ourselves and our relationships.

Buy John's book Growing Yourself Back Up Here!

Purchase The Anger Solution Master Class Here!

86. Empowered at Sea with Marnie and Maddie

Thu, 22 May 2025 21:19:20 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with betrayal trauma coach and actress Maddie Corman to explore the profound power of community in the healing journey. Maddie opens up about the importance of not going through pain alone, and how finding connection with others can be a lifeline during life’s most difficult moments. We also discuss the Empowered at Sea retreat, a transformative experience designed to support, uplift, empower, and inspire. Join us for a heartfelt conversation about resilience, support, and the courage to heal together.

Learn more about Empowered at Sea: https://helpingcouplesheal.com/empowered-at-sea/

85. Betrayed: Who Helps Him Heal?

Tue, 13 May 2025 18:55:33 +0000

In this deeply honest and compassionate episode, Betrayal Trauma Coach, Therapist, and Certified Sex Addiction Therapist (CSAT) Adam Nisenson shares his personal journey through the heartbreak of being betrayed by his now ex-wife—and how that experience transformed both his life and his work. Now the founder of betrayalshrink.com, Adam offers vital support and resources for men navigating the aftermath of infidelity. We explore the raw realities of male betrayal trauma, the often-overlooked emotional toll it takes, and how men can begin to reclaim their sense of self and safety. Adam also discusses his powerful book, A Man’s Guide to Partner Betrayal: Overcoming the Pain & Repercussions of a Cheating Partner, offering practical guidance and insight for those ready to begin healing. This conversation is a lifeline for anyone walking the lonely road of betrayal—and a testament to the resilience of the human heart.

Betrayal Shrink Website: betrayalshrink.com

Check out Adam’s book: https://a.co/d/fdk7BMI

Take the MBT (Masculine Betrayal Trauma) Recovery Assessment:

betrayalshrink.com/mbt-assesment

84. Bridge to Connection: A Pathway to Healing and Relational Growth

Wed, 07 May 2025 17:50:48 +0000

In this episode, Marnie, Ilyse, and Luke sit down to share an inside look at Bridge to Connection—Helping Couples Heal’s 5-week online group coaching program designed specifically for couples navigating the painful aftermath of betrayal.

Together, they explore how couples can benefit from ongoing structure, a slower pace than a workshop, and the opportunity to process what they’re learning between sessions.

They also emphasize how community is key; being with other couples who truly get it—is not only comforting, but vital to the healing process.

This conversation dives into the heart of what makes Bridge such an impactful program: a potent blend of expert-led psychoeducation, exponential growth through powerful coaching, and the intimacy and dynamics of the group.

Through weekly 90-minute coaching calls and access to thoughtfully crafted on-demand video lessons, couples are supported in understanding the core issues driving disconnection and begin to rebuild safety, trust, and emotional intimacy.

They encourage listeners to consider how they learn and heal best, and to recognize that rebuilding after betrayal requires more than insight—it requires support, connection, and intention.

The next Bridge to Connection cohort begins June 2nd.

If you’re ready to feel less alone and more equipped to face what’s ahead—together—this could be the next best step.

To learn more or to register, reach out to us at support@helpingcouplesheal.com

83. Porn, Masculinity, and Meaning: A conversation with Josh Radnor

Tue, 22 Apr 2025 20:34:57 +0000

In this honest and deeply personal conversation, actor, writer, director, songwriter, and musician Josh Radnor opens up about his journey away from pornography and alcohol, and the deeper realizations that led him there. Together, we explore the often-overlooked harms of porn — how it distorts intimacy, disconnects men from their emotional selves, and shapes the way boys grow into men. Josh reflects on the cultural messages that normalize these habits, the pain they often mask, and the liberation he found in stepping away. This episode is a call to curiosity, compassion, and courageous self-inquiry — for anyone questioning what true connection really looks like.

Subscribe to Museletters by Josh Radnor- https://joshradnor.substack.com/

See Josh Radnor on Tour: https://www.joshradnor.com/tour

82. Meet the Raabsmiths: Love, Rebuilt

Mon, 07 Apr 2025 20:57:12 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks to Joanna (marriage and family therapist) and Matthew (relationship coach) Raabsmith about their story of betrayal and recovery. Joanna and Matthew share how hard work, fierce commitment and the principles outlined in their book “The Intimacy Pyramid” created the foundation necessary for healing their marriage and relational transformation.

Buy their book here: https://www.amazon.com/Building-True-Intimacy-Creating-connection/dp/B0C2RX95WN

Together, they lead their private practice, The Raabsmith Team.

81. Empower Her (re-release)

Thu, 27 Mar 2025 15:22:07 +0000

We’re re-releasing a very meaningful podcast episodes for all the women who missed it the first time—or haven’t yet heard about the EmpowerHer Program.

The transformations we’re witnessing inside this group coaching program are breathtaking.

It’s the kind of healing and reclamation we wish for every woman—but especially for those who’ve walked the painful, disorienting road of betrayal.

In this episode, Marnie and Ilyse share the story behind the creation of EmpowerHer—a program born from the need to support women in the aftermath of betrayal, whether they’re staying, leaving, or still unsure.

Betrayal often throws women into a world they never asked to enter—one filled with trauma, addiction, infidelity, and confusion.

It’s easy to get stuck in survival mode, feeling shattered, lost, and disconnected from who you truly are.

EmpowerHer shifts the focus inward. It offers a new kind of conversation—one centered around self-reconnection, emotional safety, and personal power.

This is about rebuilding from the inside out: reclaiming confidence, restoring intuition, strengthening your voice, and creating a vision for the life you want.

You’ll learn more about the EmpowerHer program and how to join—either as a self-paced course or through our 12-week guided group experience, with the next cohort beginning April 14, 2025.

If you’ve felt the nudge toward healing, clarity, and wholeness, this is your sign.

We invite you to book a free 15-minute consultation call here: https://keap.app/booking/helpingcouplesheal2/free-15-minute-zoom-call or send us an email at support@helpingcouplesheal.com

80. Money and Betrayal with Deb Kaplan

Tue, 11 Mar 2025 17:07:17 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal Podcast, Marnie talks with Deb Kaplan, licensed therapist, CSAT and former Wall Street career woman, about money - a topic often dismissed or neglected entirely when helping couples heal from the traumatic impact of betrayal. In this rich (no pun intended) conversation, Marnie and Deb explore the financial impacts of betrayal and discuss the process of building trust around money and creating emotional and financial intimacy.

Debra Kaplan Books on Money:

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18892949-for-love-and-money-exploring-sexual-financial-betrayal-in-relationship

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/55589790-battle-of-the-titans

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/109581461-coupleship-inc

79. "Ghosts in the Bedroom” with Gary Katz

Sat, 22 Feb 2025 16:54:58 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with Gary Katz, LCSW and CSAT about the complex dynamics surrounding infidelity, pornography and betrayal that impact sexuality and intimacy. If you are struggling with sexual and intimacy-related issues after betrayal, including desire, safety, rejection and arousal, this episode will offer clarity and compassion and and opportunity to begin to explore the complexity of sexual and relational healing.

78. Accidentally Brave Part 2 with Maddie Corman Podcast

Mon, 10 Feb 2025 22:00:00 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal, Marnie talks to Maddie Corman again about her journey through a public discovery, grief and betrayal trauma and her powerful film (just released on HBO), Accidentally Brave. In this conversation, Maddie shares more about life, healing and recovery where the film left off including the gifts and lessons she learned along the way. With honesty and humor, Maddie brings us with her as she continues to bring hope to those still in the depths of despair.

Marnie and Maddie also announce their first professional collaboration, a women's empowerment retreat taking place March 14th - 16th in Temecula CA. (see below for details)

Details:

Intentionally Brave with Maddie & Marnie: A Healing & Empowerment Retreat for Women

Location: Temecula, California (March 14 - 16, 2025)

Join us for an intimate, transformative retreat designed for women on the path to healing from betrayal trauma. Co-facilitated by Maddie Corman, who courageously shared her story in Accidentally Brave, and Marnie Breecker, host of the Helping Couples Heal podcast and licensed therapist, this weekend offers a safe space for connection, self-discovery, and empowerment.

What to Expect:

Healing Group Sessions: Meaningful conversations and guidance designed to support your journey toward recovery and growth.

Yoga & Meditation: Gentle, mindful practices to help you reconnect with your body and find inner peace.

Sound Healing: Transformative sound experiences to release emotional blockages and restore balance.

Delicious Meals: Enjoy nourishing, beautifully crafted meals prepared by our onsite chef.

Supportive Community: Connect with a circle of women who understand your journey and are committed to healing and empowerment.

Whether you're seeking solace, inspiration, or a way to reconnect with your authentic self, this retreat offers an opportunity to transform pain into empowerment.

Space is Limited — Reserve Your Spot Today! Email maddieandmarnieretreats@gmail.com

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-news/maddie-corman-accidentally-brave-steven-soderbergh-max-1236120320/

77. Life After Discovery - A Son’s Journey Through Betrayal and Healing

Tue, 04 Feb 2025 22:24:28 +0000

In this intimate and powerful episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with Brett Rankin, son of HCH Betrayal Trauma Coaches Susan and Scott Rankin, who vulnerably and courageously shared their story of relational betrayal on the podcast in August of 2024. In this candid conversation, Brett reflects for the first time publicly on his experience navigating life after the discovery of his father’s addiction when he was 18 years old. He opens up about the emotional impacts of betrayal on himself, his role in supporting his younger sister and and his relationship with both of his parents throughout their separation and healing. He reflects on the healing process, finding resilience, and the steps he's taken toward forgiveness and personal growth.

This episode offers a rare and deeply human perspective on the ripple effects of sex addiction on families and the strength it takes to find hope and healing in the aftermath. Whether you're on a similar journey or simply seeking insight into complex family dynamics, this conversation is both eye-opening and inspiring.

Gaslighting with Dr. Kevin Skinner

Mon, 27 Jan 2025 23:36:31 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with Dr. Kevin Skinner about gaslighting and abuse in the context of betrayal trauma. Together, they explore how psychological abuse and gaslighting impacts betrayed partners and creates a significant barrier to relational healing and emotional intimacy. While an incredibly painful topic that can also trigger immense shame and a host of other difficult emotions, turning towards the reality of abuse is the only way to heal.

75. How Workshops Work

Mon, 13 Jan 2025 15:27:53 +0000

In this episode of Helping Couples Heal, Marnie Breecker speaks with Jaclyn Schwartz, licensed therapist and betrayal trauma expert , to discuss the transformative impact of workshops for couples navigating betrayal.

They explore the importance of hearing the same expert education and guidance together, the power of connecting with other couples facing similar challenges, and why early intervention is crucial to prevent further trauma caused by well-meaning but ill-informed professionals.

Marnie and Jaclyn are hosting the next Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop on January 30-31, 2025, where couples will gain a shared understanding of betrayal’s impact and leave with a defined roadmap to heal and rebuild together.

To learn more please send an email to support@helpingcouplesheal.com

To book a free discovery call please click this link 🔗: https://letsmeet.io/helpingcouplesheal2/free-15-minute-zoom-call

Don’t miss this essential conversation for couples seeking healing , clarity, and connection.

74. Empower Her

Thu, 19 Dec 2024 21:44:02 +0000

In this episode, Mamie and Ilyse share the story behind the creation of the EmpowerHer course and the need for this for women staying in the relationship, leaving the relationship or are unsure and haven't made that decision yet. They discuss how the aftermath of betrayal throws women into a whirlwind of unfamiliar world of addiction, Infidelity, and recovery. This often leaves them feeling shattered, lost, and spending years of their lives navigating a world they never asked to be in.

The EmpowerHer program shifts the focus Inward, creating a new conversation; one that prioritizes self-reconnection. It's about reclaiming her confidence, finding, and strengthening her voice, restoring her intuition while creating a vision for her life. This is a relationship program and empowers women to rebuild their lives from the Inside-cultivating a deeply connected and committed relationship with themselves.

You will learn more about the EmpowerHer course and how to join-whether through self- study at your own pace or by participating in our 12-week group coaching program starting January 7, 2025 and connecting with a supportive community of women seeking clarity and a new, empowered narrative for their lives.

73. Interview with Dr. Omar Minwalla (re-release)

Tue, 10 Dec 2024 18:28:15 +0000

This week I decided to re-release an old podcast episode from 2019 when me and Duane first interviewed Dr. Omar Minwalla. Since the time of this interview, Dr. Minwalla has expanded his model to include terms such as compulsive entitled sexuality and integrity abuse and I decided to re-introduce this initial interview to provide some context and understanding of where we are now and how we got here. The model referred to in this episode is an integral part of the Helping Couples Heal poly-theoretical approach to treating betrayal trauma.

72. Rebuilding Self-Trust After Betrayal

Wed, 20 Nov 2024 21:24:42 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Ilyse dive into the profound impact betrayal has on self-trust, exploring how infidelity and sex addiction can leave betrayed partners questioning their intuition, worth, and decision-making abilities. Together, they unpack the ways betrayal damages one’s ability to trust oneself and share actionable steps towards empowerment and self-trust. With empathy and expertise, they offer a compassionate guide to help listeners reconnect with their inner strength, rebuild confidence, and find their way back to themselves. Whether you’re navigating betrayal personally or supporting someone who is, this episode provides invaluable tools for healing.

71. A Call to Men with Ted Bunch [re-release]

Fri, 01 Nov 2024 21:15:45 +0000

This week I decided to re-release an episode from April 2023 when Duane and I interviewed Ted Bunch, the COO and co-Founder of A Call to Men.

Recently Helping Couples Heal has been focusing a great deal of attention on the topic of male socialization and male sexual entitlement. This interview with Ted provides an opportunity to further the conversation and facilitate a deep dive into the unhealthy psychology that fuels sex addiction and betrayal.

70. Consistently be Consistent

Fri, 11 Oct 2024 21:55:58 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks about the importance of consistency in healing from betrayal. Marnie candidly and directly guides both betrayed partners and betrayers to develop an understanding of what consistently means in the context of betrayal and how the role consistently plays in helping couples heal.

69. After Betrayal: Moral and Ethical Decisions Beyond the Lies and Deception

Thu, 19 Sep 2024 19:56:14 +0000

In our last episode, Marnie talked about how to move forward after betrayal with a partner who refuses to provide safety, reassurance, consistency and active participation in the healing process. In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Ilyse continue the conversation, this time turning the focus to the betraying partner. Just as the betrayed partner has important life altering decisions to make, so does the person who caused the relational destruction. These decisions must be navigated in the spirit of a fierce commitment to truth and reality, both elements which were non-existent for the betrayed partner prior to discovery.

While both partners have difficult decisions to make in the aftermath of betrayal, the discussion of the betraying partner in this context is often neglected or dismissed. In this candid discussion, Marnie and Ilyse explore some hard questions including how can the betrayer even consider leaving a relationship after years of betrayal and deception and under what circumstances could it be the kindest and most honoring of the betrayed partner to make the decision to leave.

68. The Unchangeable Truth: We Can't Change Others

Mon, 02 Sep 2024 16:00:00 +0000

The Unchangeable Truth: We Can't Change Others

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks about the pain and confusion that arises for couples when one partner is not doing the work to heal. She gently and compassionately addresses the hard truth that nobody can force another person to do recovery work, demonstrate empathy, tell the truth, change and/or heal. Using the metaphor of a bridge, we will explore the frustration and grief that accompanies the healing process, specifically when one partner isn't willing or able to cross the bridge together.

67. Healing After Betrayal: One Couple's Story

Thu, 22 Aug 2024 21:02:14 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks to HCH coaches Susan and Scott Rankin, a husband and wife with their own story of relational betrayal and healing. Susan and Scott vulnerably share their journey of healing and rebuilding their relationship and open up about the painful impact the addiction had on their lives and their relationship and the path that led them back to themselves and each other.

Listeners will hear about the pivotal moments in their recovery journey, including the decision to seek therapy, the role of honesty and vulnerability, and the long, challenging process of rebuilding trust. Susan and Scott share the tools and resources that helped them, the support systems they leaned on, and the personal growth they each experienced.

This episode offers a powerful message of hope for anyone facing similar challenges, highlighting the possibility of healing and resilience even after the deepest wounds. Whether you're dealing with betrayal in your own life or simply seeking to understand the complexities of addiction and recovery in relationships, this conversation provides valuable insights and inspiration.

66. Breaking the Silence: A Woman's Journey Through Pornography Addiction

Tue, 06 Aug 2024 17:23:59 +0000

In this deeply personal and eye-opening episode, Marnie sits down with "Jess", who bravely shares her experience with pornography addiction. Jess discusses the roots of her addiction, the emotional and psychological impact it had on her life, and the challenges she faced in seeking help.

She opens up about the stigma surrounding female pornography addiction and the misconceptions that often prevent women from seeking the support they need.

Through her story, Jess sheds light on the recovery process, the strategies that helped her heal from pornography and sex addiction and the importance of self-compassion and community support.

This episode aims to break the silence on a taboo topic, offering hope and encouragement to others who may be struggling with similar issues. Join us for a candid and inspiring conversation that demonstrates the power of vulnerability and the possibility of healing.

65. Betrayal Violence with Hope Ray

Wed, 24 Jul 2024 18:20:49 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with her friend, colleague and author of the Complex Partner Trauma magazine, Hope Ray, about integrity abuse and betrayal violence. With compassion, Marnie and Hope have a brutally honest conversation about the power and control dynamics present in relationships where betrayal has occurred.

Recognizing and acknowledging abusive behaviors, especially those tied to deceptive sexuality, is a challenging but crucial step toward healing. It requires a deep level of self-awareness and honesty, as well as a willingness to confront difficult truths about one's actions and their impact on others. This process can be painful but is essential for personal growth and the restoration of trust and relationships.

64. Financial Shame and Anxiety: Transforming fear to empowerment after betrayal

Thu, 18 Jul 2024 18:23:43 +0000

In this episode of the helping couples heal podcast, Marnie speaks with Ilyse craft, Joni ogle and Stephanie roman about the complexity of finances and more specifically, in the aftermath of betrayal.

Navigating financial fears can be daunting, especially after betrayal. It's common to feel avoidant, but it's crucial to face these issues head-on to make informed decisions and move forward. There are options and plenty of support available to help you through this.

Our own issues and fears about money can often be what keep us feeling stuck.

Developing financial confidence is key to effectively handling financial matters.

Resources for the podcast notes and/or to reference

TOP PODCASTS

Money Girl with Laura Adams

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HerMoney with Jean Chatzky

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Her Honest Money Talk

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The Ramsey Show

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BOOK RESOURCES

Smart Women Finish Rich - David Bach

Rich Dad, Poor Dad Robert T. Kiyosaki

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I Will Teach You to Be Rich: No Guilt. No Excuses. No BS. Just a 6-Week Program That Works -Ramit Sethi

Women with Money” The Judgment -Free Guide to Transforming your Relationship with Monday and Achieving Financial Independence - Vivi Robin and Joe Dominguez

Joni Ogle - Heights Treatment, Houston Texas

63. Should I stay, or should I go? with Ilyse Craft

Mon, 08 Jul 2024 20:04:16 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with HCH President and betrayal trauma coach Ilyse Craft about the complexities partners face after experiencing betrayal, specifically the decision of whether to stay or leave their relationship.

Finding clarity about the future of a relationship traumatized by betrayal involves navigating a spectrum of emotions, from hurt and anger to confusion and doubt. Factors such as the history of the relationship, finances, the extent of the betrayal and the presence of children further complicate this decision-making process.

Each individual must weigh their emotional well-being against practical considerations, often seeking clarity over time as they contemplate the impact on their future and that of their family. This episode explores these multifaceted dynamics, shedding light on the complexities that partners face when grappling with the aftermath of betrayal.

62: Men and Shame

Fri, 14 Jun 2024 19:26:07 +0000

In their final podcast episode together, Marnie and Duane talk about men and shame in the context of healing relationships after betrayal.

61: The Loss of Memories with Jake Porter

Mon, 20 May 2024 21:59:42 +0000

In this special edition of the Helping Couples Heal podcast we are sharing Marnie's segment with Dr. Jake Porter at the Choose Connection Summit, discussing the loss of memories resulting from betrayal and integrity abuse.

If you're facing the trauma and impact of betrayal, you will likely relate to what you'll hear. Take a listen to how the grief and loss is described by both the betrayed and the betrayer and the difference between their experience.

60: Integrity Abuse: The Elephant in the Room

Thu, 02 May 2024 16:34:08 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with Ilyse Craft, Certified Transformational Coach, about the "A" word that many betrayers seek to avoid.

Marnie and Ilyse dive deep into integrity abuse through the lens of deceptive and compartmentalized sexuality. Using the metaphor of the "secret sexual basement", they turn the spotlight on the word that nobody wants to say (or hear) because developing a language based in truth and creating a shared narrative is necessary for couples to heal. Accepting and naming the integrity abuse inherent in sexual betrayal is profoundly helpful for both betrayers and betrayed partners.

59: Looking Back with Stan Tatkin

Wed, 17 Apr 2024 01:19:13 +0000

In this special edition of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie talks with Stan about the original episode they recorded back in 2021 and explore why that episode was so popular with our listeners. Their conversation is followed by the re-release of the original episode.

58: One Woman's Story of Hope

Tue, 02 Apr 2024 19:34:52 +0000

In this episode of Helping Couples Heal, Marnie talks with award-winning actress Maddie Corman about her journey of healing from betrayal trauma in the aftermath of discovering her husband's secret life.

In 2015, life as Maddie knew it came to a screeching halt when the police came to her home to arrest her husband. In an instant everything changed and her life as she knew shattered in a very public and shocking way.

With raw vulnerability, Maddie shares with us how the biggest trauma of her life led to transformation, hope and healing.

57: One man's story of hope

Tue, 12 Mar 2024 20:02:12 +0000

In this episode of Helping Couples Heal, Marnie interviews Chris Jones, a coach and therapist who shares his own story of healing from problematic sexual behavior. Chris opens up about his own process, what he has learned and what was the prominent factor that caused his wife to never doubt his commitment to recovery.

56: Grief & Loss after Betrayal

Tue, 27 Feb 2024 23:24:05 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk about the losses that result from betrayal and the grieving process couples must walk through together as an important part of relational healing. When couples are able to do the hard work of grieving together, they create the shared narrative necessary to envision a future for their relationship.

55: Looking Ahead After Betrayal At The Start Of A New Year

Wed, 17 Jan 2024 00:23:24 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane discuss setting goals and intentions for the new year and the difficulty that might arise in the process when thinking about and planning for the future for couples trying to heal their relationship after betrayal.

Our intention for all of our listeners as you begin the new year is healing and peace.

54 How to Reconstruct a Relationship with Jake Porter

Sat, 21 Oct 2023 00:45:34 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with Jake Porter of Daring Ventures about trauma, addiction, secure attachment, grief and loss, and how to reconstruct a relationship that has been traumatized by betrayal. We discuss how couples can create new meaning in their relationships after betrayal and the importance of working together to develop a shared collaborative narrative of their history.

We also explore the steps and tools necessary to help couples heal and explain why it is so important for the person who has committed the betrayal to become a part of the healing process even though they are the person who is responsible for the hurting.

Please use this link to purchase Making Saves as referred in the podcast. Use the coupon code "helpingcouplesheal" for a 50 percent discount.

53: Shattering the Stigma: Providing Hope for Men Impacted by Betrayal Trauma

Thu, 14 Sep 2023 03:32:41 +0000

In the face of betrayal, healing may seem like an impossible task for male partners.

Male betrayed partners are often overlooked in the treatment of betrayal trauma. In this episode, Marnie and Duane address the challenges that male betrayed partners face in the aftermath of betrayal and emphasize the need for support in their healing process.

Men are often taught to be strong and emotionally stoic, making it difficult to seek help when they experience betrayal. The void of resources specifically for men reinforces this.

You're not alone in your pain. We see you, we hear you, and we are creating resources and support specifically for male betrayed partners.

- Marnie Breecker

While female betrayed partners, in general, have gained much more attention and resources in the last decade, men often continue to be overlooked. This podcast episode addresses the need to create safe spaces where men can express their hurt without judgment. We provide valuable insights about how the socialization of men discourages asking for help and acknowledging their pain and emphasize that acknowledging the hurt is the first crucial step toward healing.

To all the betrayed men listening, we want you to know that we recognize that your voices need to be heard, your pain acknowledged and specific resources and support dedicated to your healing.

We all deserve to heal, regardless of gender.

Betrayal does not come in one gender. When we are betrayed by the person we love the most, it does not matter what your external life is like. What you have lost is what matters.

- Duane Osterlind

The critical moments in this episode are:

00:01:27 - Differences between male and female betrayed partners,

00:03:59 - Male betrayed partners as an underserved population,

00:07:03 - Shame and stigma faced by male betrayed partners,

00:09:01 - Delayed response of male betrayed partners,

00:15:13 - Importance of Trust

Find out more about our couples workshop.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

52: Embracing a Restorative Justice Model After Betrayal

Mon, 07 Aug 2023 20:09:22 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, hosts Marnie Breecker and Duane Osterlind emphasize the importance of adopting a restorative justice model when healing a relationship after betrayal.

They advocate for moving away from a punitive mindset and instead focusing on healing, repairing the harm caused, and fostering understanding.

The hosts address common misconceptions, such as the idea that showing compassion to the betraying partner neglects or disrespects the betrayed partner. They stress that the restorative approach respects the humanity of everyone involved and allows for accountability and meaningful repair.

By embracing this model, couples can work towards true healing and wholeness in their relationships, both in the short term and for a lifetime.

The hosts highlight that the restorative justice model has been proven effective in reducing the likelihood of reoffending and increasing recovery and success rates in healing.

They invite listeners to consider this approach and reassure them of their dedication to supporting individuals on their healing journey.

Find out more about our workshop.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

51: In Each Other's Care with Stan Tatkin

Thu, 29 Jun 2023 22:01:40 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane welcome Stan Tatkin back to the Helping Couples Heal podcast to continue their discussion about healing relationships after betrayal and to talk about his new book In Each Other's Care: A Guide to the Most Common Relationship Conflicts and How to Work Through Them.

This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking to understand how to create relationships based on fairness, justice, and mutual sensitivity and how to make them thrive long-term.

Check out our free webinar on healing your relationship after betrayal trauma.

https://workshop.helpingcouplesheal.com/

50: The Power of Personal Advocacy and Collaboration in Betrayal Trauma Treatment

Mon, 22 May 2023 18:15:33 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk about being responsible for your healing and what that means. While building a treatment team is critical for successful recovery and healing, advocating for yourself is equally important.

Therapy/therapeutic coaching is a collaboration and partnership between the treating professional and the client/clients.

Learning to advocate for yourself and be a collaborative partner in this process is crucial to staying on a path that's right for you/your relationship as you heal from the trauma of betrayal.

Learn more about the HCH 2-Day Couples Workshop at:

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

49: A Call to Men with Ted Bunch

Mon, 17 Apr 2023 18:35:37 +0000

In this episode of The Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk to Ted Bunch, author, educator, activist, lecturer, and Chief Development Officer at A Call to Men, about the collective socialization of Men, the "Man Box" and how these social constructs directly impact our lives and relationships and, specifically, infidelity, betrayal, and sex and pornography addiction.

Since A Call To Men was founded in 2002, they have trained more than a million people and worked with organizations around the world, including the National Football League, National Basketball Association, National Hockey League, Major League Baseball, Major League Soccer, Uber, Deloitte, Harry’s, J.P. Morgan, the United States Military, the U.S. Department of Justice, the United Nations, and colleges and universities across the country.

Learn more about our workshop here:

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

48: Ambiguous Grief with Stephanie Sarazin

Wed, 29 Mar 2023 02:46:08 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couple Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with author Stephanie Sarazin about her book "Soulbroken: A Guidebook For Your Journey Through Ambiguous Grief," written in the aftermath of her own experience of intimate betrayal. Frequently, betrayed partners report intense feelings of grief as a result of the discovery of betrayal. Grief is a word we are all familiar with, but grieving someone who is still alive is altogether less familiar and certainly less understood. In our interview with Stephanie, we dive deep into understanding the emotional pain of a changed or lost relationship with someone you love.

To learn more about how our workshop could help your relationship heal, click the link below.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

47: Help Them Heal with Carol the Coach

Thu, 23 Feb 2023 00:47:43 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with Carol Juergensen Sheets (AKA Carol the Coach) about Help. Them. Heal., her newest book about helping couples heal their relationship after sexual betrayal. She also shares about the Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model (ERCEM) and how she trains professionals in this model to help them in their work with clients in moving towards relational healing and post-traumatic growth.

Learn more about our Helping Couples Heal workshop at https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

46: You Can't Think Your Way Out of Trauma

Tue, 24 Jan 2023 17:01:12 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with Gemini Adams, Trauma Recovery Specialist, Educator, Author, and HCH Coach, about the importance of including somatic practices in the treatment of Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD). Talk therapy and coaching have tremendous value and are often much-needed resources for individuals suffering from mental health issues, life stressors, grief, and relationship problems. Talking also has some limitations when it comes to healing complex trauma and calming a dysregulated nervous system.

After the discovery of betrayal, both partners often experience acute and chronic stress, emotional overwhelm, and relational trauma, which disrupts their ability to feel safe with themselves and may result in survival responses that increase anxiety, anger, depression, despair, and/or dissociation. Suppose you are walking the path of healing from betrayal trauma. In that case, this conversation will help you understand the importance of integrating somatic practices to help return your nervous system to safety, reduce trauma responses and move toward a greater capacity for connection, communication, and inner peace.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/our-coaches/

45: Imago Dialogue/Safe Conversations with Harville & Helen - Part 2

Wed, 14 Dec 2022 22:50:24 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane bring you part 2 of their conversation with Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt.

Harville and Helen talk about the history of IMAGO dialogue (now called Safe Conversations) and share their social vision of moving from an individualistic civilization to a relational civilization as the next stage of human social evolution. They explain how they have devoted themselves to taking a therapeutic intervention (IMAGO dialogue) that was historically taught only in a therapeutic setting and bringing it into the culture to teach all human beings how to talk.

We do a deep dive into the neuroscience behind the dialogue's efficacy, the 4 tenets of the dialogue and how the structure and safety create the necessary conditions for safe conversations.

Want to learn more about our couples workshop?

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

44: Imago Dialogue/Safe Conversations with Harville & Helen - Part 1

Wed, 09 Nov 2022 19:51:17 +0000

In part one of this special episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with relationship experts Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt about their relationship history, the struggles that almost led to divorce, and how these experiences gave birth to the co-creation of Imago Relationship Therapy and more specifically the Imago Dialogue that they now refer to as Safe Conversations. Driven by a fierce commitment to promoting the transformation of couples, Harville and Helen created a safe and structured way to help couples overcome challenges and learn to communicate and, ultimately, heal.

43: Living in Limbo

Fri, 21 Oct 2022 00:58:07 +0000

In this episode of Helping Couples Heal, Marnie and Duane answer a listener's question about how to live in limbo, without safety, after choosing to stay in a relationship after betrayal.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

42: Wholly Healthy Sex After Betrayal

Tue, 04 Oct 2022 01:32:43 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with Zoe Kors, certified Sexolgosit and HCH's resident Sex and Intimacy Coach, about healthy sexuality and sexual integration in the context of healing from betrayal and relational trauma.

Here is the link to the Sexual Reintegration Online Self-Guided Course.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/reintegration-course/

41: Betrayed Partner Trauma Responses

Fri, 09 Sep 2022 01:11:56 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane discuss the biology of partner trauma responses through the lens of attachment theory and safety. Conceptualizing partner trauma from this lens allows those who have betrayed to learn the necessary relational skills to help heal. In this short but informative episode, Marnie and Duane address the complexities of healing from betrayal trauma and the mistakes made by those who were betrayed when trying to help their partner recover from triggers and trauma responses.

40: Community

Fri, 05 Aug 2022 22:12:36 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal Podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with a couple about how the HCH couples community has profoundly changed and transformed their relationship. As Corrie and Pat reflect on their experience, Marnie and Duane discuss the importance of community and connection in healing from betrayal trauma.

Special Episode - Carol The Coach interviews Marnie about the HCH Couples Community

Thu, 21 Jul 2022 00:03:56 +0000

We hope you enjoy this special edition of the Helping Couples Heal Podcast. This is a repost of an interview on Sex Help with Carol the Coach where Carol interviewed Marnie about the Helping Couples Heal Online Couples Community and why community is so important for couples recovering from betrayal trauma.

To learn more about the community, click the link below.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/helping-couples-heal-online-couples-community/

39: Life After Recovery

Wed, 06 Jul 2022 18:53:49 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Duane and Marnie answer a listener's question about what to expect further along the recovery road for a couple recovering from betrayal trauma. What does moving forward look like after early tasks such as disclosure have been achieved? What's on the other side? Should there be more to compensate for years of acting out and integrity abuse? Marnie and Duane answer some of these questions and explore what life can look like beyond recovery when both partners are very much invested in healing the relationship

38: Transparency After Betrayal

Mon, 20 Jun 2022 20:48:10 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane discuss the importance of full transparency in a relationship traumatized by betrayal. Often we hear from hopeless partners who are in so much pain because after the discovery of betrayal, there remains a lack of integrity, specifically when it comes to full transparency.

Full transparency allows a partner to move from a place of trauma and despair to a place of security, trust, and healing. To those who have betrayed their partner, helping your partner and your relationship heal from betrayal trauma requires full transparency and the willingness to consistently provide evidence of fidelity and honesty when requested. Recognizing that a partner is seeking safety after discovery and taking action to provide full transparency without resistance, defensiveness, or anger is essential to relational healing.

www.helpingcouplesheal.com

37: Time and Expectations

Wed, 18 May 2022 18:23:04 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane discuss the importance of managing expectations around the time it takes to heal relationships after the discovery of betrayal.

Learn more about our workshop:

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

Learn more about our online couples community:

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/helping-couples-heal-online-couples-community/

36: Shame

Tue, 26 Apr 2022 20:44:21 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane discuss the topic of shame, the greatest obstacle/barrier to healing relationships after betrayal.

It is crucial that a betraying partner be accountable for their betrayal; shame doesn’t accomplish that. Shame makes healing much harder, perhaps impossible.

What accompanies shame most often is the feeling of hopelessness because it tells you that this (what you have done) is who you have always been and always will be. Rather than conceptualizing your betrayal as behavior that caused trauma to your intimate partner (and perhaps others as well), shame frames the betrayal as an integral part of your identity. Most people who feel that, at their core, they are bad will not believe that they are worthy of forgiveness and healing.

While humility pushes you to change and become a better person, shame paralyzes and prevents you from growing and healing. It disables you, blocking your capacity to take the necessary steps to heal yourself or your relationship.

Relational healing requires the ability to be relational and present. Shame does the opposite; it pushes you away from your spouse at precisely the moment you should be trying to rebuild your connection.

If shame is keeping you or your relationship stuck, please listen to this episode.

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/

35: Sexual Health with Dr. Emily Morse

Wed, 23 Mar 2022 18:58:44 +0000

PLEASE READ BEFORE LISTENING:

Please be advised that we will be talking about sexuality in this episode and, at times, will be using graphic language that may be triggering or bring up uncomfortable emotions for some. The content of this episode will not be appropriate for those of you who have recently had discovery, are in acute trauma or crisis, and/or have not yet (or have just started) to work on relational healing. This episode is for our listeners who are at a place in their healing and couples recovery where they want to begin to explore sexuality after betrayal. We don't believe anyone should even consider being sexual with a partner when there is a lack of safety, ongoing abuse, or danger. Sexual Reintegration comes at a later stage of recovery once there has been trauma reduction/resolution and relational stabilization.

Episode Synopsis

In this episode, Marnie and Duane talk with sex expert Dr. Emily Morse about sexual health and wellness and how to create the safety necessary for couples recovering from betrayal trauma. By exploring such questions as "What is healthy sexuality?" and "What is not healthy sexuality?" we begin to create a template to guide and assist couples who are ready to take this next step in their relational healing.

34: Betrayed By Porn

Wed, 02 Mar 2022 19:58:53 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane discuss the topic of pornography, specifically in the context of betrayal. This episode isn't a moral debate about pornography. Instead, it is a candid discussion about the traumatic impact of discovering a secret sexual life on an unknowing partner.

"It's just porn" is often used as a way to minimize the damage or pain experienced by the partner who was left in the dark for years. However, by definition, betrayal in itself (regardless of the nature of the sexual behavior) causes complex trauma to those who had no idea about their partner's secret sex life.

Please listen to understand how a secret pornography life causes betrayal trauma and creates deep and long-lasting wounds in couples who want to heal.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

33: The Complexity of Trust

Mon, 14 Feb 2022 18:58:37 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Duane and Marnie discuss how the compartmentalization of trust can hinder relational healing and further traumatize a betrayed partner.

While many betrayers are able to understand why their partner can no longer trust them when it comes to sexual and relational fidelity, many do not understand why their partner is no longer able to trust them in other areas "separate from the betrayal." Marnie and Duane explain why nothing remains "separate" after betrayal and how understanding the danger of distorted thinking in recovery can help prevent further trauma.

32: Therapeutic Separation

Tue, 14 Dec 2021 17:39:40 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane address therapeutic separation in the context of betrayal and relational trauma, a topic often talked about but not often understood. They discuss everything from what it is and what it is not to why a therapeutic separation can feel threatening or scary and why (if used correctly and with professional support and guidance) it can be a practical intervention for couples trying to heal their relationships after betrayal.

31: Feeling Stuck

Tue, 09 Nov 2021 20:38:01 +0000

A note to our listeners:

We want you to know how sorry we are that it's been so long since we released a podcast episode. Please know that you've been on our minds and in our hearts; it's just been a particularly crazy busy time for us and we're doing our very best to meet the needs of all of our clients, staff, and listeners. Sadly, there just isn't enough time in the day. Please bear with us, we're here for you!

Feeling stuck can mean a lot of things. In this episode, Marnie and Duane discuss what feeling stuck means in the context of relational healing and betrayal trauma. What does it look like when sobriety has been established but integrity disorder behaviors, abuse, and/or deception continue and trust and safety remain unattainable? How can you as the betrayed partner take care of yourself and get your needs met when the person who has hurt you is incapable or unwilling to take the necessary action to help you heal? This is an important conversation to listen to if you're feeling stuck in healing your relationship and don't know how to move forward with or without your partner.

30: The Truth: A Conversation with Neil Strauss Part 2

Tue, 22 Jun 2021 15:41:12 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, author and transformational journalist Neil Strauss joins Marnie and Duane once again to continue their conversation about his personal journey of betrayal and healing and the transformative work that changed his life.

Part 1

https://helpingcouplesheal.com/the-truth-a-conversation-with-neil-strauss/

29: When Feeling of Safety Don't Align: Sexual Recovery is Not Enough

Mon, 07 Jun 2021 18:53:44 +0000

In this episode of Helping Couples Heal, Marnie and Duane, explore why betrayed partners often still don't feel safe even after sexual recovery has been achieved.

28: Couples Therapy: Too Soon or Not Soon Enough?

Wed, 14 Apr 2021 17:38:11 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane respond to a listener's request for guidance about couple therapy, including when it is and isn't clinically recommended and the indicators that it is too soon or not soon enough. Betrayed partners commonly report that they have been pushed to do therapy as a couple early on in the process before they are ready and while they still feel unsafe. Join Marnie and Duane for this important conversation as they discern early couples work focused on crisis management and safety building from later couple therapy where bonding, connection, repair, and vulnerability are encouraged.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at helpingcouplesheal.com/about

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop

27: PACT Therapy, Attachment and Betrayal Trauma with Stan Tatkin

Fri, 05 Mar 2021 19:45:34 +0000

In this episode of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane talk with Stan Tatkin - clinician, researcher, teacher, and developer of the psychobiological approach to couple therapy (PACT) neuroscience and the role of attachment theory in healing betrayal and relational trauma.

Please listen carefully to every word of this interview if you are someone who has betrayed your partner and can't understand why she is as traumatized as she is by your betrayal.

26 Finding Professional Support

Tue, 02 Feb 2021 00:43:05 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane discuss the unique and often challenging process of finding the "right" help in the aftermath of betrayal. They stress the importance of a collaborative and systems-focused approach to relational helping and address the potential pitfalls of using a non-relational model, including further trauma.

25: Grief & Loss During the Holidays

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 22:41:46 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane address the topic of grieving during the holidays, when loss and grief are often felt more acutely. The holiday season, which extends from Thanksgiving to the beginning of the new year, is a very long stretch of time when there is an expectation of celebration and joy. This can feel very incongruent for those in recovery from betrayal and relational trauma because the mood of someone who is grieving is very contrary to most others' mood during these festive times.

Marnie and Duane offer some practical suggestions for surviving the holiday season, starting with simply accepting that you are grieving and that it will be different this year. Permitting yourself to make the necessary compromises and adjustments is crucial in making the holidays a bit more tolerable for yourself and your family.

24: Betrayal Trauma & The Polygraph

Mon, 02 Nov 2020 19:18:59 +0000

In this episode, Marnie talks to Ryan Angulo, a Los Angeles based Polygrapher who she has been working with since 2008. With differing opinions amongst treatment professionals and clients alike about the efficacy of polygraphs in the context of sex addiction and betrayal trauma recovery, traumatized couples are often left confused, frustrated, and uncertain about whether or not to include the polygraph as a part of their disclosure and healing process. Marnie and Ryan answer the most commonly asked questions and explore the benefits and risks of using the polygraph as a tool to promote relational healing and rebuild trust post sexual betrayal.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at helpingcouplesheal.com/about

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop

23: The Shame of Staying

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:32:41 +0000

This episode of the HCH podcast focuses on the shame many betrayed partners' experiences related to their decision to stay in the relationship with the person who betrayed them. In this conversation, Marnie and Duane conceptualize the shame of staying as another burden partners must bear in the aftermath of the discovery of betrayal.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at helpingcouplesheal.com/about

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop

22: The Truth: A Conversation with Neil Strauss

Mon, 07 Sep 2020 18:19:15 +0000

In this episode, Marnie has an uncensored and candid discussion with New York Times bestselling writer and transformational journalist Neil Strauss. Neil talks openly about his sex addiction recovery journey as chronicled in his book "The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships" With humor, humility, and honesty, He shares many of the lessons he learned in treatment, including the moments in therapy that changed his life, healed his relationship, and, most important, brought him home to himself.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

21: A Conversation With Dr. Rob Weiss

Mon, 17 Aug 2020 20:00:00 +0000

In this episode of Helping Couples Heal, Marnie and Duane talk with Dr. Rob Weiss, a clinical sexologist and the Chief Clinical Officer at Seeking Integrity in Los Angeles. In his book "Out of the Doghouse; a Step by Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating," Rob offers concrete steps men can take to rebuild trust, restore intimacy, and heal relationships traumatized by betrayal. Sex addicts are intimacy-challenged and empathy-challenged. As such, they lack the skills needed to overcome the damage caused by their infidelity and associated patterns of manipulation, deceit, and emotional and psychological abuse. In this episode, we emphasize that identifying and learning about these crucial relational skills and eventually being coached in their practice is a necessary component of recovery for sex addicts to healing relationships traumatized by betrayal.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

20: Emotional Attunement & Shame

Mon, 06 Jul 2020 19:00:00 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane share and address a listener's question about the role of empathy and emotional attunement in healing relationships traumatized by betrayal. More specifically, they conceptualize shame as a barrier to relational healing and explore the importance of shame reduction in treatment.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

19: Emotional Attunement & Empathy

Mon, 25 May 2020 18:38:47 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane discuss why emotional attunement is a necessary component for relational healing and why the" right words" without a felt sense of compassion for what your partner is experiencing and feeling just isn't enough. They also explore the role of empathy in emotional attunement and why compassionate empathy is crucial to healing partner and relational trauma.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

18: Understanding Betrayal with Dr. Omar Minwalla Part Three

Tue, 28 Apr 2020 10:00:00 +0000

In the final episode of a 3-part interview with Dr. Omar Minwalla, Marnie and Duane continue the conversation about integrity abuse disorders and gender pathology in the context of betrayal trauma.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Online Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

17: Coping With The Pandemic

Mon, 30 Mar 2020 18:00:00 +0000

In this special edition of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane speak to those impacted by betrayal about the added stress and trauma caused by the current global crisis and the importance of social connection during a time of physical distancing and isolation.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

16: Understanding Betrayal with Dr. Omar Minwalla Part Two

Mon, 23 Mar 2020 10:00:00 +0000

In the second of a series of three interviews, Marnie and Duane continue their conversation with Dr. Minwalla about integrity abuse disorders; the clinically significant deficits in integrity and patterns of psychological, emotional and relational abuse which cause complex trauma symptoms in betrayed partners.

15: Understanding Betrayal with Dr. Omar Minwalla Part One

Mon, 10 Feb 2020 11:00:00 +0000

In the first of a series of three interviews with Dr. Omar Minwalla, Marnie and Duane explore the impact of emotional and psychological abuse in the context of betrayal trauma and explain how this kind of abuse is part of a larger problem that Dr. Minwalla calls an integrity abuse disorder.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

14: Marsha & Michael's Recovery Story

Wed, 08 Jan 2020 11:00:00 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane interview "Marsha and Michael" about their relational recovery journey in the aftermath of sex addiction and betrayal. With incredible vulnerability, they share with us how they survived and healed from relational and betrayal trauma To protect their anonymity, we have changed their names and used software to disguise their voices.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

13: Trust After Betrayal

Fri, 20 Dec 2019 11:00:00 +0000

Marnie & Duane discuss why it is so difficult to rebuild trust after betrayal.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

12: Understanding Disclosure with Dan Drake

Wed, 20 Nov 2019 22:39:57 +0000

In this interview of the Helping Couples Heal podcast, Marnie and Duane speak with our colleague Dan Drake, LMFT, CSAT-S about the process of the formal therapeutic disclosure. We discuss and explore the value of disclosure and its impacts on recovery from betrayal and relational trauma. We address some of the most common questions and discuss the importance of safety and therapeutic support in the disclosure process.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

11: Evolution of Partner Trauma Treatment with Stefanie Carnes

Tue, 22 Oct 2019 10:30:00 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane speak with Stefanie Carnes about the evolution of the partner trauma model and the necessary shift from the codependency model in treating betrayal trauma.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

10: A Partner Sensitive Recovery Plan

Tue, 08 Oct 2019 21:00:00 +0000

In this episode, Duane and Marnie will introduce and explain the fourth (other) circle and explore how it changes the treatment for both partners and promotes relational healing for couples impacted by betrayal trauma.

The Three Circle Plan originated from Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) and has been effective for years in helping sex addicts achieve and maintain sobriety. However, in a field that continues to evolve and move from a traditional addiction/codependent model to a partner trauma model, the absence of a fourth circle fails to acknowledge the others impacted by the addict's recovery plan.

Introducing a fourth "other" circle invites the others impacted by an addict's sobriety into his recovery plan and treatment from the very beginning.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

09: Discovery: Managing the Crisis

Tue, 17 Sep 2019 18:00:00 +0000

In this episode, we discuss universal partner trauma responses and explore how the discovery of betrayal creates a crisis for the entire family system.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

08: John & Jane's Recovery Story

Mon, 12 Aug 2019 20:00:00 +0000

In this episode, we talk with John & Jane (not their real names) about their recovery journey through betrayal and relational healing and how the trauma model changed the trajectory of their healing. This episode is filled with hope for those who are still suffering.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

07: Interview with Dr. Omar Minwalla

Mon, 05 Aug 2019 10:00:00 +0000

In this episode, we interview Dr. Omar Minwalla, Clinical Sexologist, licensed psychologist and founder of The Institute for Sexual Health about his compulsive-abusive-sexual relational disorder model. Dr. Minwalla explains how his model significantly changes the treatment of betrayal and relational trauma.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

06: The Sex Addict: Integrating the Partner Trauma Model Part 2

Fri, 19 Jul 2019 20:00:00 +0000

In this episode, we continue to discuss why it’s so crucial to integrate the partner trauma model into the addict/offending partner's treatment right from the start; abstinence alone is not enough to heal a relationship.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

Learn More About Our Helping Couples Heal 2-Day Workshop at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/workshop/

05: The Sex Addict: Integrating the Partner Trauma Model Part 1

Mon, 01 Jul 2019 19:30:00 +0000

In this episode, we discuss why it’s so crucial to integrate the partner trauma model into the addict or the offending partner's treatment right from the start; abstinence alone is not enough to heal a relationship.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

04: Survival Responses

Tue, 04 Jun 2019 10:00:00 +0000

In this episode, we discuss the two causes of trauma in a betrayed partner's experience; the initial trauma or "discovery" and trauma-induced survival responses and how these responses can cause further trauma to a betrayed partner.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

03: Pathologizing the Partner vs. Partner Trauma Model

Thu, 23 May 2019 21:39:45 +0000

In this episode, we discuss the two approaches to the treatment of betrayal trauma; the traditional codependency/co-sex addiction model and the partner trauma model. We explain why the traditional approach lacks the necessary relational component and why we use this approach to treat partner and betrayal trauma.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

02: Betrayal Trauma & Relational Healing

Fri, 10 May 2019 18:40:47 +0000

In this episode, we define betrayal and relational trauma, why it is so important to talk about this topic and discuss why it is so difficult to heal. We also explain why understanding betrayal trauma is crucial to relational healing.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/

01: Introduction & Hope

Tue, 07 May 2019 22:40:28 +0000

In this episode, Marnie and Duane introduce themselves, share their professional experience and explain why they created the Helping Couples Heal Podcast.

They also share powerful quotes from addicts and partners about how they healed from the trauma of betrayal.

If you have been traumatized by betrayal, listen to this episode for hope and inspiration.

You can find out more about Duane and Marnie at: http://www.helpingcouplesheal.com/