In this episode, I was joined by the amazing author and parenting coach, Mary Van Geffen. Since 2011, Mary has coached over 1,700 moms of “Spicy Ones”, walking with them through the same struggles she once thought would break her. She now has a book titled, “Parenting a Spicy One: A Compassionate Guide for Raising a Deep-Feeling and Wonderfully Strong-Willed Kid” which prompts today’s conversation. 

As parents of foster and adoptive kids, sometimes we have a “spicy” child - a child who is very emotional, passionate, strongwilled, and maybe labeled as “challenging, difficult, stubborn” and any other descriptors. It can be extremely taxing and difficult navigating this relationship - what do you do when the kid refuses to brush their teeth or change out of their pajamas? It feels like one battle after another, and it can send our nervous systems into overdrive and survival mode, hijacking us into an overly reactive state because we are at our limit. Mary offers a ton of practical advice throughout this conversation – it’s almost like she’s an amazing coach! She has a lot of great insight for shifting our perspective on this “spicy” little one of ours and how to truly connect with them. 

I am so glad you’ve joined me for this episode! Let’s dive in! 

Key topics in this episode: 

• Defining a spicy child and their temperament
• The importance of communication and connection
• Practical tools for daily parenting challenges
• The power of repair and forgiveness in relationships
• Shifting mindset from control to compassion

Connect with Mary on her website or Instagram, and get a copy of her book! 

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

In this episode, I was joined by a mom who’s message spoke near to my heart and I believe many parents in this calling: Jamie Erickson. Jamie is the busy mama of five kiddos, ages ranging from college to 8th grade, and she also homeschools. She is also an author with a recent book that speaks to my heart, “Overwhelmed Mom: Quiet the Chaos, Mind What Matters, and Enjoy Your Life Again.”

As adoptive and foster parents (and even just biological parents, of course!), we are carrying a very heavy load and I feel overwhelmed. Jamie’s book comes at a perfect time in my life and I hope you will also find it encouraging and practical. 

Key topics in this episode: 

• Types of overwhelm: circumstantial, emotional, and self-inflicted
• The importance of managing priorities and setting boundaries
• Practical tips for reducing overwhelm: analog life, digital detox, and community support
• The role of faith and trusting God in overcoming stress
• Recognizing physical and emotional signs of overwhelm

Connect more with Jamie on her website. 

And check out new book and topic of today’s episode, Overwhelmed Mom: Quiet the Chaos, Mind What Matters, and Enjoy Your Life Again

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

In this episode, I was joined by Dr. Kelly Flanagan. Dr. Kelly Flanagan is an award-winning author, international speaker, personal and relationship coach, and licensed clinical psychologist with two decades of expertise in interpersonal relationships. His thought leadership has been featured in The 5 Love Languages, the TODAY Show, Reader’s Digest, HuffPost, and Success Magazine. Kelly’s two non-fiction books, Loveable and True Companions.

He has recently released The Road Less Triggered which is the topic of our discussion as foster and adoptive parents. Dr. Kelly discusses what it means to be triggered in the clinical sense and how we as parents can experience it and our children - biological, adoptive or foster. He also shares his own personal journey and how he overcame his own triggers which were causing destruction in his relationships. This is a great and practical conversation to help us in any stage of this calling. 

Key topics in this episode: 

• Understanding the clinical and broad definition of triggers
• Physiological signs of being triggered and interoception
• Balancing regulation and recognition in emotional responses
• Empathy and boundaries in trauma-informed care
• Practical steps for owning moments and teaching children

Connect more with Dr. Kelly on his website. 

And check out his book, The Road Less Triggered. 

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

In this episode, I chat with the amazing Abbey Wedgeworth and through our conversation we promise you: you are not ruining your kids!

Abbey is a wife, mother, bible teacher, and writer. She's the author of the Training Young Hearts children's book series, Held, a resource for women who have lost life in the womb, and most recently Help! I’m Ruining My Kids: A Gospel Guide for the Mom Who’s Desperate for Change. Abbey and her husband, David, live on the South Carolina coast, where she homeschools their three boys. 

In our conversation today, we unpack some of the ideas in her latest book. Abby drops some amazing truthbombs for us as adoptive and foster moms. Sometimes we feel the pressure to “do it all” and forget that God is in control and sovereign. With this unnecessary pressure, we can feel like we’re failing and “ruining” our kids. Abby reminds us that human limitations are not sin. While our role as parent is a large one in our child’s life, it is not equal to or as big as God’s role. We are imperfect people trying to raise these broken kids and God knows exactly what He’s doing when He pairs us with them. It will not be perfect and that’s where He shows up. Abby says if our kids share their testimony and they share something we did wrong, then praise the Lord because it is part of their testimony! 

Connect more with Abby on her website and Instagram. 

Click here to buy her book! 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I was joined by the amazing author, mother, and ministry warrior Blair Linne. Blair recently wrote a children’s book called, “Yara the Brave and the Swirling Worry” and any time we have a resource for our adopted and foster kiddos, I want to talk about it! This children’s book is all about anxiety which sparks my conversation with Blair - what is anxiety, how does it manifest physically in us or our kids, what are some techniques to cope or calm down? Those are just a few of the things we cover and all from a Biblical perspective. 

Connect more with Blair online and Instagram! 

Click here to buy her book! 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest is so full of energy and passion for uplighting you as a prayer warrior: Shellie Rushing Tomlinson! Shellie is a multi-published author, speaker, and farmer’s wife known for saying “Life can be hard when it’s good, but it’s always better when you’re laughing.” She joins me today for a conversation about prayer, and specifically Shellie says, “Don’t pray like her!” It is easy to compare ourselves to others at church, in bible studies and such, thinking “Oh, she’s got it all together, her prayers are so nice and she knows what she’s doing” but Shellie reminds us that no one can pray like we can to our Father in Heaven! 

Shellie encourages us to embrace what makes us unique and our season of life. Instead of obsessing over “quiet time,” just pray right then and there when you feel led to do it. Don’t wait for an opportunity to pray - just talk to God! Shellie also gets into other practical tips and advice she has learned over the years on her walk with God and hopes you feel empowered to pray. It is especially important as foster and adoptive parents in this calling to be rooted in God as we face so many challenges. 

Connect more with Shellie on her website, Instagram, and Facebook. 

Click here to buy her book! 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest is a children's book author, public speaker, and a busy biological, adoptive and foster mom: Beth Guckenberger. Beth is someone I have seen speak in sessions at Christian conferences and my daughter loves her latest book! I am so grateful she is my guest today to speak into the lies our kids believe and even ourselves, and how we can combat this with God’s truth to build emotionally stable homes. 

Deception, manipulation, triangulation, aggression, even violence, these are just some of the challenging and problematic behaviors we may experience with our foster and adoptive kiddos but what if I told you these were symptoms? These behaviors come from a child’s fear and insecurity, and not knowing how to deal with it in a healthy way. Often these kids have needs which are unmet, and when you grow up not having your needs met by parental figures, it develops these unhealthy coping mechanisms or methods of getting what you want. While this is frustrating for us as the parents trying to love our kids (and then to feel like they’re angry at us or lying to us all the time) it is important to remember this is coming from a place of fear, insecurity, and not knowing any difference. This is the key to breakthroughs - addressing the roots and not the symptoms: overcoming lies with truth. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Understanding children’s emotions and thoughts
• How challenging and problematic behaviors are often symptoms to a child’s inner identity and thought-process, and that’s the root which should be addressed. 
• Identifying lies and intrusive thoughts
• Recognizing behavioral signs of struggle
• Creating emotional safety in chaotic environments
• Marriage as the concrete foundation for the home and how to protect it
• Balance between child’s needs and parent’s needs 
• Understanding spiritual warfare in your home
• Empowering children with tools against the lies of the enemy 

Connect more with Beth on her website and Instagram! 

Check out her children’s book series, StrongHeart Series: 

The BRAND NEW addition to the series, “The Heart Who Wanted to Lasso Thoughts (A story about turning bad thoughts to good with prayers of gratitude)

The Heart Who Wanted to Be Free (A story about finding freedom through admitting our wrongs)

The Heart Who Wanted to Find a Way (A story about calming anxiety through resting in God)

The Heart Who Wanted to Be Whole (A story about healing from negative talk through God's truth)

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest is an unusual one for this show but still speaks relevant truth to us as adoptive and foster parents–especially fathers. My guest is Trey Tucker, the founder and owner of Rugged Counseling, known for providing therapy without the fluff. He is a mental health expert and social media influencer, specifically targeting young men to help them live out their God given purpose. His counseling and videos resonate because they challenge passive, surface level advice and speak honestly about responsibility, identity, boundaries, and purpose. He is also now an author with a book titled, “Tough Enough: Hone Your Habits, Cultivate Purpose, and Forge Genuine Strength.” 

Our conversation today stems around how fathers can step up in their role with foster and adoptive children, and how mothers can support their husbands, too. I ask Trey a lot of questions around the husband and father’s experience, their mental health journey, and some of it parallels what we know traumatized kids experience: feeling isolated, purposeless, and unseen. Fathers are vital in the household but can be often misunderstood. This conversation benefits both husband and wife, father and mother, as they are united in this calling. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Defining Biblical manhood
• The insecurities many men face and don’t voice 
• How men can be resilient and possess emotional strength
• What wives can do to support their husbands  

Trey Tucker’s new book: “Tough Enough: Hone Your Habits, Cultivate Purpose, and Forge Genuine Strength.” 

Trey Tucker’s website

Trey Tucker on YouTube

Trey Tucker on Instagram 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest is an adult adoptee named Niemah Scherlacher. Niemah is currently working on a book detailing her incredible adoption story, but we are honored to hear her share pieces of this story on the podcast. She is now a retired and happy grandma, but her story begins in Israel, after being born to a fifteen year old Palestinian girl. As Niemah describes, God protected her mother and her during this tumultuous time between Israel, Palestine and even the United States, and He orchestrated everything so Niemah would be adopted at the age of two and brought over to the states.

 Niemah also shares her experience as an adopted child in her family, how the church community interacted with her, and the secular world. Niemah encourages parents to talk with their children about the child’s story because the child is always wondering those questions but might be afraid to ask them. Niemah had an unusual experience when compared to other adoptees because she primarily wrestled with God in her later years after more information was revealed about her birth mother…

 Here are a few key takeaways:

●     Naima's story is a testament to God's divine intervention.

●     Adoption can be a celebrated aspect of a child's identity.

●     Open communication about adoption is crucial for children.

●     Children often think about their adoption, even if they don't express it.

●     It's important for adoptive parents to initiate conversations about identity.

●     Healing from adoption-related trauma can be a lifelong journey.

●     Understanding a child's background helps in parenting.

●     Adoptive parents should not be too hard on themselves.

●     Children's struggles can be transformed into hope for others.

●     God's purpose is at work in the lives of adopted children.

Niemah is still working on her book so follow her on Facebook and Instagram to stay connected!

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

 To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here!

 You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

 I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest is an adult adoptee named Niemah Scherlacher. Niemah is currently working on a book detailing her incredible adoption story, but we are honored to hear her share pieces of this story on the podcast. She is now a retired and happy grandma, but her story begins in Israel, after being born to a fifteen year old Palestinian girl. As Niemah describes, God protected her mother and her during this tumultuous time between Israel, Palestine and even the United States, and He orchestrated everything so Niemah would be adopted at the age of two and brought over to the states. 

Niemah also shares her experience as an adopted child in her family, how the church community interacted with her, and the secular world. Niemah encourages parents to talk with their children about the child’s story because the child is always wondering those questions but might be afraid to ask them. Niemah had an unusual experience when compared to other adoptees because she primarily wrestled with God in her later years after more information was revealed about her birth mother… 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Naima's story is a testament to God's divine intervention.
• Adoption can be a celebrated aspect of a child's identity.
• Open communication about adoption is crucial for children.
• Children often think about their adoption, even if they don't express it.
• It's important for adoptive parents to initiate conversations about identity.
• Healing from adoption-related trauma can be a lifelong journey.
• Understanding a child's background helps in parenting.
• Adoptive parents should not be too hard on themselves.
• Children's struggles can be transformed into hope for others.
• God's purpose is at work in the lives of adopted children.

Niemah is still working on her book so follow her on Facebook and Instagram to stay connected! 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest and friend is Cynthia Yanof, who has been featured on this podcast before. Cynthia is the biological mother to two kids who have flown the nest, one graduated from college and one just starting, and her family also adopted a son who is in third grade. Cynthia stays busy not just as a mom but as a podcaster, speaker, and author. Her latest book, “How’d I Miss That?” sparks a lot of today’s conversation. 

It is so easy to get distracted as a foster or adoptive parent by all the busyness and urgent tasks of life, and I wanted to take a minute with Cynthia to focus on what really matters in this calling. A lot happens in life, a lot of distractions or even too much information, so let’s get back to the basics. Somewhere along our journeys, God opened our eyes to loving children who are not our own. How do we do this well? Cynthia offers advice gained from her own experience, along with humor and gut-punches (the good kind!).

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Understanding what really matters as parents is crucial.
• Little differences in our actions can lead to significant impacts.
• The urgent tasks in life often don’t have an eternal impact.
• Finding humor in parenting challenges can ease stress.
• If you’re going to laugh about it later, laugh about it now
• Community and support are essential for foster and adoptive parents.
• Being a 'namer' helps children understand their identity in Christ.
• A reluctant 'yes' to God's calling can still lead to great things.
• The Lord is faithful and will reveal Himself in our journeys.
• Life is short; we must not miss the opportunities God gives us.

You can learn more about Cynthia Yanof on her website

You can follow her on Instagram

You can check out MESSmerized with Cynthia Yanof click here

You can find her book on Amazon or wherever you shop for books! It is called, “How’d I Miss That?: Gas Pump Confessions, Drive-Thru Obsessions, and Figuring Out What Really Matters”

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest and friend is Christie Erwin! Christie is an author, adoptive and biological mother, and Founder and current Executive Director of Project Zero. Christie’s deep love for children led her and husband, Jeff, to become foster parents in 1993, for a private, non-profit adoption agency. It was there that the foundation for Christie’s passion and driving concern for children in foster care was laid. After fostering for eleven years with the private agency, the Erwin’s became foster parents for the Arkansas Department of Children and Family Services in 2004. They fostered over fifty children during their twenty years of fostering. She wrote the book, “The Middle Mom –How to Grow Your Heart by Giving it Away.” 

In our conversation today, Christie shares part of her story in adoption and foster care. There is so much to tell, we couldn’t go over everything, but we covered a lot. Christie also offers advice for you if you’re saying “Yes!” to this calling. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Christie's journey into foster care began with a powerful calling from God.
• Maintaining a healthy marriage is crucial when navigating the challenges of foster care.
• The concept of being a 'middle mom' emphasizes the importance of loving children unconditionally.
• Grief is a part of the sacrifice when fostering and adopting children.
• Understanding a child's past is essential for effective parenting in adoption.
• Preparation for adoption includes understanding trauma and its effects on children.
• It's important to make God's voice the loudest in your calling.
• Community support and resources are vital for foster and adoptive families.

You can learn more about Project Zero and Christie Erwin! 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my guest is Pastor Andrew Hopper. Andrew serves as the lead pastor of Mercy Hill Church, launched in 2012. He is the father of three biological children and one adopted daughter with downs syndrome. He is also a recently published author of the book, “Chosen: Building Your Family the Way God Builds His.” 

In our conversation, we talked about the theological foundation of adoption. We, as Christians, are intimately connected to adoption because God has adopted us. This should highly motivate us, if not compel us, to support adoption or even pursue adoption ourselves. Andrew talked about how churches can support members who are pursuing adoption and how the calling may have its challenges but is also rewarding. He also shares his personal story going through the adoption of his special needs daughter. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• There is no love without sacrifice.
• Cute pictures and sad stories are good reasons to adopt, but the great reason is that we were chosen.
• No one should adopt alone.
• Chosen people choose people.
• The enemy hates Christian adoption.
• The deepest things come from the most sacrifice.
• Adoption is the single greatest metaphor for what God has done in our life on the planet.
• We have to prepare people for the spiritual war that comes with adoption.

You can learn more about Pastor Andrew Hopper and his new book on his website. 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest is the amazing Nicole C. Mullen, a Grammy-nominated, Dove Award-winning American Christian singer, songwriter, actress, and author of the new book, “It’s Never Wrong to Do the Right Thing: Courageous Stories to Inspire Godly Decisions”. She also has an incredible story of overcoming domestic abuse, adopting her two sons, choosing life for her daughter, and a story of choosing life from her grandparents. 

Our conversation spans stories of the Bible to Nicole’s own personal journey to how it is relevant for us as adoptive and foster parents today. We may not see the total impact of saying “yes” to this calling, but it can ripple through generations. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• God is with you in the dark seasons of life, as Nicole puts it the “night seasons” and often He works a lot in the dark. 
• The impact of choosing life may never been seen earth-side but it is full of rewards from God 
• The impact of saying “yes” to life can continue for generations, like Nicole’s personal story and the story of Moses
• Nicole worked through a dark season of domestic abuse. She encourages parents to children from abusive homes to model Jesus the Good Shepherd in being patient and gentle. 
• Even if we are Christians, we are not immune to the hard things of this world. Nicole points out how God is with us even when we sin, suffer the consequences of our actions, or the consequences of other people’s sin and actions, and how He is good in that. 

You can learn more about Nicole on her website

Here is her new book, It’s Never Wrong to Do the Right Thing: Courageous Stories to Inspire Godly Decisions

Connect on instagram! 

Christian Parenting resource for you: Morning Minute

Subscribe now at MorningMinute.org  to receive each weekday morning a verse to strengthen your spirit, one parenting insight grounded in Christ-like wisdom, one short action item to guide your heart and your kids’ and one resource to help you go deeper.

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Thank you for joining me on the very first episode of Season 4! It is a privilege and gift from God to be able to share the practical, clinical, and Biblical information with you every week about adoption and foster care, which is a calling so near to our Father’s heart. In this episode, I am sharing with you the power and significance of praying for your child, whether they’re with you for a brief season or a long one, and a list of prayers you can use. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• The most important practice of the Christian faith is prayer.
• Prayer carries over the course of a lifetime.
• We need the power of prayer as adoptive and foster parents.
• More is caught than taught; let children see you pray.
• Prayer is about communing with God, not just asking for things.
• We should pray for our children's specific needs and concerns.
• Prayer is our greatest weapon against the enemy.
• Let's gather together in prayer as a community.

In this episode, I also share some big and exciting news! I am working on a book! I have been working on a book based on my adoption journey for a few years now, so to finally partner with a publishing company to make this a reality is amazing. The book is coming in the Fall 2027, which seems far away but it will come before we know it. 

To submit your prayer requests, use this form by clicking here! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. 

I would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This is the end of season three. The team here at Called to Love are so grateful for you joining us every week to learn practical and Biblical tools and knowledge for adoption and foster care, a calling which is so reflective of God’s adoptive love for us. As we look forward to another year and a new season, we wanted to share with you the five top moments from 2025.

#1 is from “Trusting God With What We Cannot Control: Waiting for Adoption” released on February 25th. The clip chosen is about how to wait with God for adoption.

#2 is from “Tools for Self-Regulation, Anger Management and Coping Mechanisms” released on April 8th. The clip chosen is about helping regulate your child. Somer is joined by Kimberly Dubose. Kimberly is a Family Centered Therapy Clinical Caseworker with Connected Families.

#3 is from “You're Not Too Late: Trusting God's Timing for Your Adoption Story” released on June 3rd. The clip chosen is about the challenge of trusting God’s timing. In this episode, Somer was joined by a special guest: Rebecca George, a dear friend, author, speaker, and host of the Radical Radiance podcast. 

#4 is from “Understanding Blocked Care with Lisa C. Qualls” released on March 25th. The clip chosen is about the result of high need care-giving. In this episode, Somer is joined with Lisa C. Qualls. Lisa is the proud mother of both biological and adopted children, twelve in fact, and is an accomplished author, speaker, and Enneagram coach with TBRI training.  

 #5 is from “Adopted By God: The Spiritual Healing in Adoption & Foster Care” released on May 20th. The clip chosen is about parenting while being broken yourself. In this episode, Somer is joined by author and adoptive father, Matt Lambert. Matt and his wife live in the UK with their two adopted children. 

Please join us in a prayer over Called to Love, that it will continue to serve and reach families in need of support, encouragement and resources. 

You can email Somer your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. Somer would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you her monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This is the second part to my special episode where my husband, Corey, and I reflect on ten years as adoptive parents. We share stories from when God first placed this calling on our hearts, the messy beginnings to bringing our baby daughter home, the changes in our marriage, and how God always had a plan. 

Corey shares valuable insight from his perspective as the head of our household and a calming technique he uses in his practice as an occupational therapist. Corey says you will never be ready to say “yes” because there are simply too many question marks, so you have to take a leap of faith. He also encourages parents to equip themselves with two things while proceeding in this calling: wisdom and bravery. 

Here are a few key take aways: 

• Adoption brings out both the best and worst in parents.
• Communication is key in navigating parenting and marriage.
• Faith is essential in parenting and decision-making.
• Every child has unique needs that must be understood and met.
• Parenting is a form of discipleship, not just a task.
• It's important to seek God's guidance in parenting.
• The journey of adoption is filled with challenges but is rewarding.
• Parents should not wait for the perfect moment to adopt.
• Learning to communicate effectively can strengthen a marriage.
• It's okay to not have all the answers as a parent. 
• Seek the Lord and pray. 

Want to keep Christian Parenting going? The network is listener-supported! Consider giving an end-of-year gift that provides resources to Christian parents. Check out cpgive.org 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This is a very special episode, split into two parts, where my husband Corey and I reflect on ten years as adoptive parents. We share stories from when God first placed this calling on our hearts, the messy beginnings to bringing our baby daughter home, the changes in our marriage, and how God always had a plan. 

Corey shares valuable insight from his perspective as the head of our household and a calming technique he uses in his practice as an occupational therapist. Corey says you will never be ready to say “yes” because there are simply too many question marks, so you have to take a leap of faith. He also encourages parents to equip themselves with two things while proceeding in this calling: wisdom and bravery. 

Here are a few key take aways: 

• Adoption brings out both the best and worst in parents.
• Communication is key in navigating parenting and marriage.
• Faith is essential in parenting and decision-making.
• Every child has unique needs that must be understood and met.
• Parenting is a form of discipleship, not just a task.
• It's important to seek God's guidance in parenting.
• The journey of adoption is filled with challenges but is rewarding.
• Parents should not wait for the perfect moment to adopt.
• Learning to communicate effectively can strengthen a marriage.
• It's okay to not have all the answers as a parent. 
• Seek the Lord and pray. 

Want to keep Christian Parenting going? The network is listener-supported! Consider giving an end-of-year gift that provides resources to Christian parents. Check out cpgive.org 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, my special guest is the founder of The Mission Driven Mom and creator of the MDM Academy: Audrey Rindlisbacher. Audrey’s world was turned upside down when she, at the time a mother to four kids herself, decided to foster her cousin’s four children, ages ranging from twelve years old to newborn. In this conversation, we unpack her story, this incredible experience, and how God led her to utter faithfulness. 

Specifically, I ask Audrey how to cope with the weariness that comes from this calling. When Audrey was at her lowest point, she turned to God like she never had before and was completely changed. Audrey encourages moms to seek resources, fill their needs, and especially fulfill their spiritual needs like prayer. 

Here are a few key take aways: 

• Foster and adoptive parenting can be incredibly challenging and rewarding.
• Prayer is a powerful tool for finding clarity and strength.
• Self-care is essential for caregivers to effectively support children.
• The feelings of love often stem from actions of love.
• God's plan may not always align with our expectations, but it is always good.
• Community support can make a significant difference in the foster care journey.
• Being a foster parent requires vulnerability and courage.
• Every child in foster care has a unique story and needs.
• Sometimes when God says “No” it can be scary, and we have to trust His plan.

Want to keep Christian Parenting going? The network is listener-supported! Consider giving an end-of-year gift that provides resources to Christian parents. Check out cpgive.org 

Check out Audrey’s amazing resources at https://www.themissiondrivenmom.com/

Listen to her podcast: click here

Check out the Mission Driven Mom Academy: click here 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, Jill Marier joins me on the podcast to discuss the need for fostering medically fragile children. Jill has a rather unique family, and in her words she says “we get stares.” They have a large household full of children that are adopted, biological, and fostering, many of them are medically fragile. Jill’s heart was moved to medically fragile kids after her biological son JoJo was born with cerebral palsy. He is non-verbal and confined to a wheelchair. Going through this experience, Jill’s heart broke for all the kids with these medical hardships without any parents or guardians to walk through it with them. They’re alone and often abandoned because of their medical needs. 

Not only did Jill and her husband begin to foster and adopt many of these children, and the need is so great, but they started a non-profit farm which has wheelchair accessibility. The farm is a safe space for parents to bring their medically fragile children to have fun with some animals.

Together in our conversation, we unpack the fears surrounding foster care and adoption with medically fragile children:  “I’m not qualified” or “I’ll be too attached” or “What if they die?” and more. These fears are lies from the enemy to keep you from following God’s calling. Jill and Somer do not shy away from the hard things but God is with you always. 

Here are a few key take aways: 

• Every child deserves a loving family, regardless of their medical needs.
• Foster care can be a rewarding but challenging journey.
• It's important to overcome fears and say “yes” to fostering if God calls you.
• Daily life with medically fragile children involves careful planning and routine.
• Community support is crucial for families in foster care.
• Loss and grief are part of the foster care experience.
• Building connections with nonverbal children is possible and rewarding.
• Creating inclusive spaces for children with special needs is essential.
• Setting boundaries is necessary to maintain family dynamics in foster care.

You can check out Christian Parenting’s gift guide by clicking here. 

You can learn more about the Mad Hatter Farm on their website: https://www.madhatterfarm.org/

And on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/madhatterfarmandrescue 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am helping you better understand embryo adoption. IVF treatments have risen in popularity as desperate families seek to get pregnant, but the process comes at a great cost— and not just financially, but also emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually as families navigate what to do with excess embryos. Because the success rate is so small, facilities will create more embryos than a couple may necessarily want to carry and raise. There are a few options for these embryos: adoption (which I highlight) or termination or scientific experimentation. This is an extremely heavy decision for the parents to make. 

Embryo adoption is where an adoptive mother has the embryo placed inside her to carry to term, if successful. There are some factors to this adoption which are different from a traditional one: in utero bonding and potentially breastfeeding. (A newborn adoption could also involve breastfeeding, but it is a different process to achieve this.) 

Through this episode, I seek to make you aware of all the different factors of embryo adoption, what it is, and what is happening with so many families in the IVF process. 

There is plenty of controversy even in Christian circles on this topic and I seek to approach it with information and empathy. There are countless little lives frozen right now, waiting for homes. 

Here are a few key take aways: 

• Embryo adoption is a process of placing fertilized embryos with adoptive parents.
• The IVF process can lead to difficult decisions regarding surplus embryos.
• Success rates for embryo adoption can be as high as 59%.
• Embryo adoption allows for biological siblings to be raised together.
• The financial cost of embryo adoption is generally lower than traditional adoption.
• There are emotional challenges and grief associated with embryo adoption.
• The process requires legal documentation and a home study.
• Adoptive parents can bond with the child during pregnancy.
• Controversies exist regarding the ethics of IVF and embryo adoption.
• Seeking God's guidance is essential in the decision-making process.

You can check out Christian Parenting’s gift guide by clicking here. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by a joyful and light-filled author, speaker, and mom: Alice Matagora. Alice shares her story about a painful waiting process, depending on God’s promises. Inspired by this waiting journey, as a new mom Alice wrote the book, “You Are My Miracle”. All children are a miracle from God and this book helps us affirm this truth over our children. Through our conversation, we discuss the miracle it is to be a parent, to raise our kids, and the challenges of the waiting process till that child enters our life. 

Here are a few key take aways: 

• Waiting can be emotionally taxing and filled with uncertainty.
• There can be a lot of grief in infertility. 
• It's important to seek God during times of waiting and uncertainty.
• Community support is crucial for those going through infertility or adoption processes.
• Every child is a miracle, regardless of how they come into a family.
• The journey of waiting can lead to personal growth and deeper faith.
• Parents should communicate to their children how loved and wanted they are.
• It's essential to remember the struggles of waiting even after fulfillment.
• Hope is a continuous journey, not just a destination.

Connect more with Alice on Instagram and Facebook. 

Check out her website to learn more! 

Here is her book referenced in this episode, “You Are My Miracle”

You can check out Christian Parenting’s gift guide by clicking here. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by the amazing and inspiring Jamie Finn. Jamie is an author and busy mom to both biological and adopted children, and their family has been fostering for years. She is also the founder and president of Foster the Family, a national nonprofit that serves vulnerable children and the families welcoming them, as well as the founder of the Filled Gathering, the largest gathering of foster and adoptive moms in the world. 

Together, we discuss adopting children from foster care. There is a huge stigma against foster kids, being labeled as “problematic” and an underlying fear that you can’t handle their pain and trauma. There is also the fear of becoming attached to a foster child only for them to be reunified, even though reunification is the first priority of foster care. There are many more fears and apprehensions, so how do we face them as Christians, standing on God’s Word and His calling for us to care for “the least of these”? 

One big point is we are all called to love these kids, but that doesn’t mean everyone is called to adoption or fostering. You can start by supporting those who already are! This may be a small thing but it is huge to the families who desperately need this support and community. And if God does call you into this, you may find yourself with support and community because you served others. Another key point Jamie and I discuss is surrendering to God in this calling. You have no control over what happens and that may be scary but it strengthens your faith. There is also so much beauty in adoption because God has adopted us. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Foster care is a mission that requires commitment.
• Fear is a natural response to the unknown in foster care.
• Preparation is key, but you can never be fully ready.
• Reunification is the priority, but permanency is also important.
• Grief is a complex emotion in foster care.
• God's love is constant, even in brokenness.
• Community support is essential for foster families.
• Surrendering control is a part of the journey.
• Children need to see a model of unconditional love. 

Connect more with Jamie on Instagram or her website. 

Check out Jamie’s book: Foster the Family: Encouragement, Hope, and Practical Help for the Christian Foster Parent

Check out Jamie’s new book for foster kids: God Loves Kids: A Gospel-Centered Book About Foster Care

You can check out Christian Parenting’s gift guide by clicking here. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Leah Brandon Akannam and Brian Murphy from the Gift of Adoption Fund. One of the biggest things stopping people from pursuing adoption is the cost. Resources like the Gift of Adoption Fund are here to bridge the gap and take down this barrier to a child finding their home. 

We discuss the different ways the fund helps various circumstances from traditional adoption to kinship, foster-to-adopt, and even adult adoptees. Leah and Brian also share stories from the families impacted by this resource. Brian highlights that while their organization does a lot, there are plenty of funds out there as well, and the biggest thing is spreading awareness about these resources so children can find a home. Brian emphasizes that if this is something God has laid on your heart, He will ultimately provide the financial support you need to bring the child home–all you have to do is answer the call.  

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Over 2 million families in the US are waiting to adopt.
• 81% of potential adopters cite high costs as a barrier.
• Gift of Adoption has awarded over $22 million in grants.
• Adoption costs can range from $25,000 to $50,000 for domestic adoptions.
• Foster care adoptions typically have no costs for families.
• Gift of Adoption provides grants from $1,000 to $15,000.
• Families should apply for assistance as soon as their home study is complete.
• There are no strict income limits for eligibility; each case is assessed individually.
• The organization has programs for young adults aging out of foster care.
• Crowdfunding grants are available to help families raise funds for adoption.

The Gift of Adoption Fund website: https://giftofadoption.org/ 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by the founder of Finally Home: Kristin Orphan. Finally Home exists to walk alongside foster, adoptive, and kinship families with faith-rooted resources that bring hope, healing, and strength. They are a national non-profit that provide tools, courses, resources and community to families so they can find connection and confidence every day. 

Kristin was inspired to start Finally Home after her own adoption journey and being devastated by the calling. God called her and her family to this but that didn’t make it easy. There was a lot of sacrifice, heartache, and learning through her journey–in fact, the journey isn’t over even though her children are adults! In this conversation, we discuss how God brings encouragement when you’re discouraged or depressed. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• The importance of unity in marriage when considering adoption.
• Adoption is a lifelong commitment that requires ongoing support and learning.
• Resilience is key in parenting adopted children, especially through challenges.
• Community support is crucial for families navigating adoption.
• Trauma-informed care focuses on relational connection with children.
• Distraction techniques can help manage challenging behaviors in children.
• Parents should seek to understand their child's unique needs and responses.
• It's important to give children a voice in family decisions without placing the burden of choice on them.
• The journey of adoption can lead to personal transformation for parents.
• God is WITH you in this calling! 

Learn more about Finally Home and access all their parenting courses and more at https://finallyhome.net/ 

Email and mention Called to Love so the team can connect with you: info@finallyhome.net 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Hally Wells. Hally Wells is speaker, author, and mental health advocate. After struggling with infertility, Hally and her husband had their biological child, but following a miscarriage she felt God place adoption on her heart. She is now the mother of bio, step, and adopted children, and advocates for their mental health and the mental health of parents too. 

Hally discusses what things to look out for in our adopted and fostered kids, some of the warning signs, and unique struggles they may face with identity. We also discuss the need for support, resources, counseling, and strong communication with your children. Hally brings up that adoptive parents can also experience trauma which is why it is important to take care of yourself too, so you can be a calm, strong presence in your child’s life. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Mental health concerns in youth have escalated, especially post-COVID.
• Adopted children often experience grief and identity issues.
• Trauma impacts all adopted children, even from in utero and birth. 
• Parents should be aware of signs of mental health struggles in their children.
• Support groups for adoptive parents can provide essential encouragement.
• Cultural heritage plays a crucial role in a child's identity and mental health.
• Open communication is vital for adopted children to express their feelings.
• Counseling can be beneficial for both children and parents.
• Understanding the unique challenges of adopted children is essential for effective parenting.

Learn more about Hally Wells on her website here: https://www.hallyjwells.com/ 

The book Hally recommends, “The Anxious Generation” 

Another book she recommends, “The Deepest Well” 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week I am fan-girling out just a little bit because my special guest is Dr. Kathy Koch. Dr. Kathy has a PhD in reading and educational psychology from Purdue and is a former university professor now turned child advocate who founded Celebrate Kids. She has written several books, and her latest one (co-written with Dr. Jeff Myers) is called “Raising Gender-Confident Kids: Helping Kids Embrace Their God-Given Design”. This is the topic of our conversation, as many foster and adoptive parents may find their children especially vulnerable to the gender identity crisis. 

Together, we discuss how to be bold in our parenting while also pursuing connection, trust, and relationship-building. God has given us the task of stewarding these kids and we cannot shy away from this reality. At the same time, if your child is coming to you already in a gender-confused state, it is important to show them love, compassion, and build trust so perhaps they can tell you what’s really going on. Dr. Kathy gives us powerful information and practical tools to equip us for this reality we face as parents.

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Parents need to be bold and honest about gender issues.
• Stereotypes can trap children in false beliefs about their identity.
• Churches must address tough topics to help guide youth.
• Creating a safe space for discussions is crucial for trust.
• Parents should affirm their children's identity and interests.
• It's important to teach children about the beauty of God's creation.
• Parents should not blame themselves for their children's struggles.
• Encouragement and support are vital for parents facing challenges.
• Identity formation is a lifelong process that requires consistent effort.

Learn more about Dr. Kathy’s organization, Celebrate Kids: https://celebratekids.com/

Dr. Kathy recommends one of her books, “Five to Thrive” and her latest release which informed a lot of this episode: ”Raising Gender Confident Kids” 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week I am joined with Bill High. Bill is the CEO of Legacy Stone and the author and co-author to many books. He is a counselor and public speaker, passionate about empowering families to leave a legacy for generations. 

In our conversation, we explore the importance of building a lasting family legacy through faith, family values, and purposeful living. Bill shares practical steps for families to create structure and stability, emphasizing the power of repetition in instilling values. We hope this offers encouragement for parents navigating the challenges of foster care and adoption. You're playing a vital role in shaping the next generation.

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• The calling of foster and adoptive parents is significant to the kingdom of God.
• Defining family values is crucial for protection and attraction.
• Kids are a heritage from the Lord, and families should treat them as such.
• Regular family meetings can help reinforce family values and vision.
• Structure and stability are essential for children from chaotic backgrounds.
• Repetition is key in teaching values to children.
• Parents should focus on being faithful rather than fixating on outcomes.
• God can turn broken situations into something good. 

Connect more with Bill High on his website or social media. And the website for Legacy Stone: https://legacystone.com/ 

Bill High’s new book: THE LEGACY LIFE: BOOK AND DEVOTIONAL - A Paradigm Shift that Will Help You Build Your Family for Generations to Come, Guided by Biblical Values.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week I am joined with Dr. Zoe Shaw. Dr. Zoe is a licensed psychotherapist, author, speaker and an expert on what she calls “Complex Shame”. She is also a busy mom of five kids, and actually part of her story is being a birth-mom. We talk a lot about being adoptive and foster parents, and this conversation gives us a small glimpse of a birth-mom’s experience. For Dr. Zoe, it was an experience filled with shame.  

This episode is all about unpacking that: shame. All of us experience shame to different degrees, in fact its origins can be seen in the first few chapters of Genesis, where Adam and Eve are ashamed and hide from God. That is how Dr. Zoe describes and differentiates shame and guilt: shame is when we hide. Shame can be destructive and impact our relationships. 

This is incredibly important for us to understand as parents, to navigate our own shame, and also to help us better understand our kids’ shame. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Shame causes us to hide and affects our relationships.
• There is a difference between guilt and shame.
• Guilt can lead to positive change, while shame distances us from God.
• Complex shame is often tied to past trauma and experiences.
• Recognizing our shame story is crucial for self-worth.
• Healthy emotional boundaries allow for better relationships.
• Walking alongside children helps them process their feelings.
• Writing can be a powerful tool for communication with children.
• Repairing relationships requires acknowledging our own shame.
• Healing from shame is a journey that involves vulnerability.

Connect more with Dr. Zoe Shaw on her website or on instagram.

You can also buy her new book, “Stronger in the Difficult Places: Heal Your Relationship with Yourself by Untangling Complex Shame”

Christian Parenting’s latest resource: Friday Favorites Newsletter 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week I am joined with Daryl Potter. Daryl doesn’t have adopted or fostered children but he does have a miraculous daughter with complex medical needs and another biological son. Whether your kids are biological, adopted, or fostered, there are universal truths in parenting and along with it circumstances which take us to the brink of our capacity–physical, emotional, mental and even spiritual. 

In this episode specifically we are looking at the unique challenges of raising kids with complex medical needs. Daryl shares his personal experiences, insights, and advice for you if you’re in the trenches of that right now. This may be a calling on your life – to adopt or foster children with complex needs – or this is a circumstance out of your control in your biological children. Whatever the case may be, the grueling long nights in hospitals, the panic, the fear, the weight of it all can wear you down. This is why Daryl shares how mindfulness as found in Ecclesiastes is so powerful and a Biblical tool for managing it. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Navigating parenting with complex needs requires emotional resilience.
• Communication is key in marriage, especially during challenging times.
• Personal growth often comes from facing unexpected parenting challenges.
• Building a support network is crucial for families dealing with special needs.
• It's important to maintain perspective in difficult situations.
• Mindfulness can help parents enjoy the present moment.
• Parents should learn to express their emotions, including vulnerability.
• Children can be affected by the caregiving dynamics in the family.
• It's essential to listen to children's feelings and experiences.
• Finding joy in small moments can help alleviate stress. 

Connect more with Daryl on his website or social media. 

You can also check out his books! He recommends your local library but you can also purchase wherever books are sold. The books he explicitly mentions are: 

“Something More: Living Well in a Broken World” and “Even the Monsters. Living with Grief, Loss, and Depression: A Journey through the Book of Job”

Christian Parenting’s latest resource: Friday Favorites Newsletter 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week I am joined with an adult adoptee and new author, Emmanual Jean Russle. Emmanuel grew up in Haiti with his grandmother before being adopted into the United States. In our conversation, we briefly discuss his upbringing and transition to the states and then Emmanuel shares his passion for sharing this message: God has a plan for  every child. Emmanuel also offers encouragement to adoptive families navigating their unique journeys.

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Emmanuel's story highlights the importance of purpose in every child's life.
• Adoption can bring about significant changes, but love and support are crucial.
• Quality time spent with children fosters a sense of belonging.
• Every child's experience with adoption is unique and should be respected.
• Parents should treat adopted children as they would biological children.
• It's essential to acknowledge and celebrate a child's heritage.
• Prayer and guidance are vital for families considering adoption.
• Books can be powerful tools for understanding and discussing adoption.

Connect more with Emmanuel on social media. 

Check out his book: “Hello! My Name is Emmanuel - An inspiring true story of adoption, celebrating new”

Christian Parenting’s latest resource: Friday Favorites Newsletter 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week I am joined with Dana Hargrus, a mental health counselor with over twenty-five years of experience in trauma-informed care. We discuss the innovative approach of biofeedback in helping foster and adoptive parents navigate the challenges of caring for children from hard places. Dana shares her personal journey as a foster and adoptive parent, emphasizing the importance of connection and healthy attachment in mental health. The conversation highlights the need for alternative solutions to traditional medication and discipline methods, advocating for a more compassionate and understanding approach to parenting.

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Biofeedback is a form of brain exercise that helps improve mental health.
• Connection is essential for healing trauma in children.
• Punishment and discipline are often ineffective for children from hard places.
• Healthy attachment is crucial for mental health and can be developed at any age.
• Parents should focus on building connections rather than enforcing strict discipline.
• The current mental health system often fails children in foster care.
• Biofeedback can be a beneficial alternative to medication for managing mental health issues.
• Understanding a child's trauma history is key to effective parenting.
• Parents need support and resources to navigate the challenges of foster care and adoption.
• It's never too late for healing and change in a child's life.

Learn more about Dana’s practice Restore of Ada by calling 580-453-1076 or email them at contact@restoreofada.com or you can find their website https://restoreofada.com/about-restore 

Check out Dana’s resource, a brief podcast about trauma: Find it on Apple or Spotify. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Every Monday, host Courtney DeFeo shares a short prayer to help you lift up your kids. This year’s series follows Christian Parenting’s brand new prayer journal, A Great Cloud of Witnesses. 

Each week highlights a biblical hero of the faith, paired with Scripture-based prayers for your kids. Here is a sneak peek into week one:

This first week is all about Noah—a man of incredible faith and obedience. While the world around him turned away from God, Noah walked in righteousness. Building the ark probably looked foolish to everyone else, but Noah trusted God’s word even when it didn’t make sense. That’s the kind of faith we want for our kids: to listen to God’s voice over any others and walk confidently with Him even when it means standing apart.

If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes. 

Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today

Follow Pardon the Mess on Apple or Spotify

Called to Love is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

This week I am joined with Abby Halberstadt, who’s been on the show before. Abby is a busy mom of ten biological kids, homeschools all of them, builds houses with her husband, and works as a fitness instructor, but most importantly she is a woman firmly planted on a Biblical foundation. In this conversation, we unpack the myth she shares in her recent book “You Bet Your Stretchmarks” which is a myth that your motherhood is wasted. Even though Abby has biological kids, all of us as foster and adoptive moms have the scars of motherhood and often the mundane and thankless jobs of wiping bottoms, sleepless nights, and sweeping cheerios can make us ask, “Is this worth it?” Abby reminds us that our motherhoods are eternally significant and callings from God. Even if our acts of love are unthanked and unseen, those sacrifices have an immeasurable impact. 

Abby also walks us through some of the lies in our culture that prey upon moms and their identities. She strongly encourages us to find our contentment in God and not in comparing ourselves to others. Our culture, and the Enemy through it, are feeding lies to moms that they are alone and the motherhood experience is all negative. We know, however, through scripture that nothing is wasted. 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Motherhood is a calling of eternal significance.
• The 'wasted mother myth' undermines the value of motherhood.
• Daily sacrifices of mothers are meaningful and sacred.
• Creating rhythms in daily life can help manage overwhelm.
• Contentment comes from focusing on God's word, not worldly standards.
• Community support is essential but not always available.
• Every act of motherhood, no matter how small, has value.
• Mothers should not compare their journeys to others.
• Recognizing the mundane as sacred can transform perspective.
• Motherhood is a legacy that impacts future generations.

Learn more about Abby on her website and social media or buy her new book “You Bet Your Stretchmarks!” wherever you get your books, like Amazon. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more! 

This week I am joined with author and busy mom, friend of the show, Molly DeFrank! Molly is the proud mom of six kids, ages ranging from teenagers to young ones, both biological and adopted. Her family has also fostered children, and her two adopted kids came first from fostering. 

In this episode, we are talking specifically about raising Godly sons as we live in a world that is telling them their masculinity is toxic and they just need to sit still. Anyone with a little boy knows they have so much energy and can’t focus, and while this may be frustrating it is also how God made them. Molly wrote a book titled, “Mothering Boys: 8 Things Your Son Needs From You Before He Turns 10” which has inspired this conversation. Especially if you have children in your home who come from foster care, they may have negative relationships to masculinity, either from bad male role models, failed father figures, or even abuse. 

We have such an important role as parents to train up these kids, help shape and root their identity in God, and establish their worldview. Let’s talk about the practical ways we can help them be empowered young men for Christ! 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Boys face societal pressures that can negatively impact their self-worth.
• Building connection and trust is essential for effective parenting.
• Simple moments can create meaningful connections with boys.
• Unconditional love is crucial for boys to feel safe and accepted.
• Storytelling can help boys understand their identity and values.
• Creating safe spaces for boys to fail fosters resilience.
• Moms should focus on their own well-being to better support their children.

Learn more about Molly on her website or connect with her on social media! 

Interested in her book? Click here to learn more! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more! 

This is the fifth and final episode in this summer series breaking down how to emotionally regulate your household, tips that I have learned and personally used and hope will benefit you. Specifically, this episode wraps up our series as I talk about five ways you can recover after a dysregulation incident. There is so much adrenaline rushing in our kiddos bodies, and maybe even in our own, that it is very unlikely things will “go back to normal” or what you or the child was doing before the breakdown. So, what do you do? 

I have five methods we use in our household: presence, gentle touch, pressure, going outside, and playing. In this episode, I dive deeper into each one of these with some clear examples as well! 

I would love to hear from you if you begin using these strategies or share ones you’ve found that work in your household! 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Your presence as their safe and trusted caregiver is invaluable.
• Gentle touch can help regulate the central nervous system.
• Pressure can offset pent-up energy in children.
• Going outside and grounding can aid recovery.
• Fun and play are essential for emotional healing.
• Laughter can create positive connections with children.
• Caregivers must discern the right approach for each child.
• Nurturing after dysregulation is crucial for recovery.
• Building trust takes time and patience.

Free Downloadable Resource From Somer: Click Here & Enter Your Email

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more! 

We are in the fourth week of my series breaking down how to emotionally regulate your household and I am going to give you tools for de-escalating your child during those meltdown moments. This week has honestly been challenging as I’ve been at my own breaking point and needed to use these regulation tools on myself. 

I am going to share my personal experiences dealing with overwhelm and introduce you to the Three C’s of regulation: Cold, Counting, and Choices. And I have had to use all three this week myself! I am going to emphasize the significance of modeling self-regulation techniques, understanding children's fears, and empowering them through choices to foster a sense of control and calmness. 

I would love to hear from you if you begin using these strategies or share ones you’ve found that work in your household! 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• You're not alone in feeling overwhelmed.
• Modeling regulation techniques is crucial for effective parenting.
• Cold can help de-escalate intense emotions in children.
• Counting provides a distraction and helps regain focus.
• Choices empower children and reduce power struggles.
• Praise your child's progress to encourage better behavior.
• Understanding fear can help address escalated behaviors.
• Building skills takes time and repetition.
• Children are capable of learning to regulate their emotions.

Free Downloadable Resource From Somer: Click Here & Enter Your Email

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more! 

This is our third week in my new series breaking down how to emotionally regulate your household and I am going to give you tools for de-escalating your child during those meltdown moments. This episode is all about the 3 B’s: Breathing, Bilateral Movement, and Beating Heart. These three tools can effectively help you calm your child, build trust and connection, ultimately leading to better emotional regulation and communication within the family. These strategies do not take away the need for guidance, correction, and addressing dysfunctional behaviors but help your child receive your instruction because you’ve built trust and love. 

I would love to hear from you if you begin using these strategies or share ones you’ve found that work in your household! 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• Dysregulated behaviors require a confident caregiver's presence.
• Breathing techniques help reset a child's nervous system.
• Bilateral movement engages both sides of the brain for regulation.
• Heartbeat time provides comfort and connection during distress.
• Practicing tools alongside children builds trust and safety.
• Regulation tools prepare children for better communication and correction.
• Planning and having tools ready can improve family dynamics.

Free Downloadable Resource From Somer: Click Here & Enter Your Email

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more! 

This is our second week in my new series breaking down how to emotionally regulate your household. Specifically in this episode, I am explaining the HALT method--Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired—a powerful tool to help manage behavioral escalations. I am also sharing some personal examples and practical insights to guide you in fostering a nurturing environment with a biblical foundation. 

Tune in to learn how addressing basic and felt needs can transform family dynamics and build trust. Don't miss this essential episode for every parent looking to enhance emotional and behavioral regulation at home! 

Here are a few key takeaways: 

• The HALT method is essential for emotional regulation.
• Understanding hunger can prevent behavioral issues.
• Anger is a natural emotion that needs management.
• Loneliness can occur even in crowded spaces.
• Rest is crucial for emotional and physical health.
• Building trust is key to effective parenting.
• Recognizing triggers can help in de-escalation.
• Biblical examples provide insight into caregiving.
• Practical tools can be adapted for individual needs.
• Consistency in approach fosters better relationships.

Free Downloadable Resource From Somer: Click Here & Enter Your Email

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more! 

In this episode, I am kicking off a five-part series on emotional and behavioral regulation in your family. We are in the thick of summer but if we’re being honest, it hardly feels like a “summer break.” From summer camps, VBSs, traveling, and all other kinds of extracurricular activities that keeps our summers busy, there is hardly a “normal” day. The routine of the school year is almost completely out the window for many of us. This can be a fun time but it can also be an exhausting and overstimulating time of year. That is why it is the perfect time for me to tell you about these emotional and behavioral regulation tips and strategies, and I will be diving deeper into them over the next four weeks. 

I hope in this episode you will:

1. Better understand the signs of dysregulation and its impact on family dynamics
2. Learn how to model emotional regulation and create a calm environment
3. Discover the importance of maintaining healthy authority and setting boundaries
4. And, explore practical tools like positive reinforcement and teaching emotional language. 

Here are a few takeaways: 

• Disregulation affects both parents and children.
• Recognizing signs of disregulation is crucial.
• Self-regulation is essential for effective parenting.
• Creating a calm environment can reduce disregulation.
• Modeling emotional regulation helps children learn.
• Validating emotions while maintaining respect is important.
• Teaching emotional language aids in communication.
• Establishing boundaries provides safety for children.
• Encouraging problem-solving fosters ownership in children.
• Patience and consistency are key in parenting.

Grab your FREE DOWNLOAD: 10 Ways to Promote Emotional and Behavioral Regulation in Your Family

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more! 

In this episode, I am joined by Katie Davis Majors. You may know her as the author of “Kisses from Katie” and she is the founder of the Amazima Ministries which works to keep kids with their biological families in Uganda. Katie shares her incredible story of how God took her “Yes” and and multiplied not just her family (raising 13 adopted girls and having two biological boys with her husband) but her ministry. 

In our conversation, I ask Katie about how on earth she juggles fifteen kiddos and all the work she does, along with other questions about trauma, supporting those kids with resources, and what she has learned along this wild journey. 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• Katie's journey began with a mission trip to Uganda.
• Many children in institutional care have living relatives. 
• These kids are living in orphanages because it can be their best option for education, meals, and healthcare but it means separation from their biological families. This broke Katie’s heart. 
• Foster care experiences led Katie to adopting 13 children.
• Community support is vital in parenting and service.
• Learn how to say “I need help!” and not feel ashamed or embarrassed; we need each other, especially in this calling. 
• Dependence on God is essential in parenting challenges. 

Connect with Katie on social media

Check out her website

Check out her book, “Kisses From Katie” 

Learn more about Amazima Ministries! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Rachel Van Kluyve, who is a homeschooling, book-writing, bio and adoptive mama to four kiddos! Rachel’s two adoptive daughters are both Black American which has given Rachel some interesting challenges to navigate. She realized they do not have a lot of representation, from baby dolls to storybooks, which inspired her to create her own children’s book series about two black girls. 

In our conversation, we unpack the unique challenges of a transracial adoption: the unsolicited questions and comments from friends, family, or people online, how to style their hair, how to incorporate their culture and affirm their identities, and more. Rachel also shares that both of these adoptions are open adoption and recommends parents consider it, even though it seems “scary.” In fact, Rachel encourages parents to consider any kind of adoption and trust the Lord will provide the child, no matter the race, gender, background, etc… 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• Understanding the Lord's sacrifice is comparable to adoption.
• Open adoption can provide a sense of connection for children.
• Faith plays a crucial role in the adoption process.
• Representation in children's literature is essential.
• Navigating criticism as a transracial family can be challenging.
• Building relationships with birth mothers is important for the child's identity.
• Every adoption story is unique and requires grace and understanding.

Connect with Rachel on social media

Or you can check out her website 

And pre-order her new children’s book! “Louie and La'Ree Empty the Sea (Sister Adventures)”

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by a man with an incredible and powerful story: Jackson TerKeurst. If you recognize that name, it is probably because he was adopted by author and speaker Lisa TerKeurst. Jackson came to the TerKeurst family after trying to survive gunfire and starvation during the Liberian Civil War. He was a teenager when he was adopted and now he’s a published author too. 

In our conversation, Jackson discusses the challenges he faced, the importance of faith, and the lessons learned through adversity. He emphasizes the significance of being present for adopted children, celebrating their cultural identity, and embracing God's plan, which often diverges from our own expectations. His story is a testament to resilience, hope, and the power of community. 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• His adoption story is unique, filled with years of prayer and longing for family.
• Adoptive parents should prepare their hearts, not just their homes.
• Celebrating a child's culture is crucial for their identity.
• Struggles in adoption are part of the journey, not a sign of failure.
• Being present and patient is essential for adoptive parents.
• God's plan often differs from our own, requiring surrender and trust.

Connect with Jackson TerKeurst on Instagram

Or you can check out his website 

And buy his new book on Amazon! 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by New York Times best-selling author, speaker, podcaster, advocate for Downs Syndrome kids, and adoptive mom: Heather Avis. Heather started “The Lucky Few” movement to change the narrative behind children with Downs Syndrome. She says every time her kids walk out her door and into the world, they are walking into a world that does not value them. 

As Heather shares in this podcast episode, if the narrative behind Downs was different it is likely the bio families of her two kids wouldn’t have put them up for adoption. Adoption inherently comes with the breaking of what God created to be together: family. There is immense beauty and joy in adoption, in redeeming what has been broken, but we cannot shy away from or “fix” that brokenness. It can be a hard thing to sit with but it cannot be ignored. Still, Heather advocates not only for the value of children with special needs but she encourages Christian families to consider adoption. This calling may not be easy but it is a calling straight from God - to love the widows and orphans. 

In our discussion, we unpack Heather’s incredible adoption story. She shares wisdom from her experience raising not only two children with Downs syndrome but also a bi-racial child that does not have special needs. 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• The importance of letting go of control in parenting.
• Create an inclusive home environment for children of all backgrounds.
• Encourage curiosity and understanding differences in children.
• The significance of affirming children's worth and identity.
• Recognizing the ongoing struggles of children with disabilities in society.
• The value of connecting with resources and stories from adoptees and birth families.

Connect with Heather Avis on social media or learn more on her website. 

You can also buy her books! Her new book is titled I Like You So Much

You can also learn more about The Lucky Few Foundation. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Susan TeBos, an author and adoptive mom to three now-grown children. Susan shares her experiences and insights on parenting adopted teenagers, focusing on the unique challenges they face as they process loss and identity. She emphasizes the importance of creating safe spaces for emotional expression, recognizing warning signs, and building trust through consistent communication. Our discussion highlights the need for adoptive parents to be patient and understanding as their children navigate their feelings and experiences related to adoption.

There is a myth that if you adopt a child straight when they are born, take them home from the hospital, that somehow there is no trauma or loss. This isn’t true, and I have first hand experience with it. Our kids may exhibit the trauma in different ways or at different stages of life, but there is trauma due to the loss of one’s biological roots. Susan described her kids as being “fun and playful” during their younger years, but showed more of those signs of trauma as they entered puberty. 

I hope that through this episode, you will be more equipped to support your adoptive or foster kids, even if they haven’t entered their teenage-years yet. 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• Adopted teens process loss in unique ways.
• Curiosity can lead to clarity and compassion in parenting.
• Consistency in communication builds trust with teens.
• Parents should recognize warning signs of emotional distress.
• It's important to check in with teens regularly about their feelings.
• Adoptees often feel alone in their experiences and emotions.
• Grieving is a process that should be shared with parents.
• Parenting adopted children is a lifelong commitment.
• Understanding adoption-related issues is essential for emotional support.

Connect with Susan TeBos on Facebook or Instagram 

You can also check out her website and her book, “We've Been There: True Stories, Surprising Insights, and Aha Moments for Adopted Teens” 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Kate Rietema. Kate is an author, speaker, and mama to five kiddos, some adopted and some biological. In our conversation, we discuss how to navigate sharing your child’s adoption story with them. Adoption is beautiful but it comes at a huge loss, a heartbreak for our kids, and it can be hard to share this with them or help them understand it in a way that helps them still feel loved and chosen. 

Stories are powerful and the stories our foster and adoptive kids tell themselves have a huge impact on their identity and worldview; that is why it is crucial we carefully craft a story that rings true Biblically. It is also important to pause when our child wants to tell us something about their past, and be there, listening and supporting.  

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• Storytelling helps build strong identities in adopted children.
• It's important to highlight both the difficult and beautiful aspects of adoption.
• Creating a culture of openness allows for ongoing conversations.
• Children often want to hear stories about themselves.
• Patience is key when introducing sensitive topics.
• Listening is more important than responding immediately.
• Resources like life books can help children understand their stories.
• Trusting in the Lord's plan is essential for adoptive parents.

Connect with Kate on Instagram or check out her website 

You can also find her books on Amazon or wherever you find your books. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by a dear friend, author, speaker, and host of the Radical Radiance podcast, Rebecca George. Rebecca is sharing her heart and experiences as we discuss God’s timing and how hard it is to wait. Our hearts are longing, especially in this calling, and that longing isn’t bad but it can easily turn into an idol. So, how do we navigate this God-given longing while honoring Him in the waiting? 

The truth is the longing doesn’t stop even when we’ve reached the point we’ve been praying and waiting for. A new longing takes its place. This is why it is so important we learn how to be present with God in the season He’s put us in right now and trust His timing. 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• You're not too late, trust God's timing.
• Longing leads to more longing in life.
• It's important to celebrate others' blessings.
• You need a support system in your journey.
• Be honest before the Lord about your desires.
• Don't miss out on your life today.
• Learn how to talk about your journey.
• Your longing is valid and part of your story.

Connect with Rebecca on Instagram or her website! Listen to the Radical Radiance podcast wherever you find your podcasts. 

Check out her brand new book, which sparked today’s conversation: “You’re Not Too Late: Trusting God’s Timing in a Hurry-Up World”

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by a fellow adoptive mom, Megan May. Megan is also a self-published book author and creator of the You Matter Boutique which is designed to create meaningful things for both birth-moms and adoptive moms. Originally, Megan wanted zero kids, but God had other plans. Now Megan is the joyful mother to three biological children and one adoptive daughter. 

God does not offer us happiness or comfort in this life but we can definitely experience His joy which is far greater. God also likes to change our plans and change our hearts, which is exactly what happened to Megan. Adoption can feel scary, stressful, and daunting as we might feel unequipped, imposter syndrome, and uncertainty–that’s why we wanted to emphasize the joy in this episode! 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• Adoption can bring immense joy despite its challenges.
• Finding joy in the hard moments is essential.
• It's okay to feel doubt and fear when considering adoption.
• Choosing joy is a daily decision that can transform lives.
• Creating a culture of joy in the home is vital for family dynamics.
• Community support can help find joy during tough times.

Find Megan’s Self Published Book: “From Zero to Four - My Journey Of Stepping Into A Life I Did Not Plan”  

Check out the You Matter Boutique 

Follow Megan on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/youmatter.boutique/ 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by author and adoptive father, Matt Lambert. Matt and his wife live in the UK with their two adopted children. Through the adoption experience, Matt unpacked some of his own brokenness and began to experience spiritual healing as he was “adopted by God.” This inspired him to write his book “Adopted by God: Healing Through Connection to the Father” which is the topic of our conversation. How does the adoption process bring up your own burdens, childhood memories or trauma? For Matt, it was feeling disconnected and misunderstood by his own parents, because he was “weird.” He reframed this as an adoptive parent in a lightbulb moment as being “wired” by God in a unique way. This realization helped him in raising his adoptive children, who also have attachment and connection struggles. 

Together, we talk about the spiritual healing that can happen with this calling because it is so closely aligned to God’s love for us - adopting His broken children. We are broken as parents, so how do we raise our adopted and fostered kids, who inherently experience brokenness too? 

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation: 

• Adoption can lead to significant personal growth.
• Therapeutic parenting is essential for adoptive families.
• Self-examination is crucial for effective parenting.
• Neurodiversity impacts family dynamics and parenting styles.
• Healing often comes through understanding one's own brokenness.
• Parenting is a long-term journey, not a quick fix.

Matt Lambert’s Book: Adopted by God: Healing through connection to the Father

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I ask the question posed by many in the foster care system: should I adopt my foster kids? How will I know if that is what God is calling me to do? Or… what if He says no? I share statistics, information, but also share my personal experience where God told our family “no” to an adoption and I was not expecting it. As I like to say, in this calling you must “love fiercely and hold loosely.” In this calling, you have to be prepared for the unexpected, various outcomes, unknown possibilities and know God is with you every step of the way. Prayer is crucial, as well as unity in your marriage, and your support systems. 

Hopefully, through this episode, you are better equipped to face those situations… 

Here are a few takeaways: 

• Statistics show that 400,000 children enter foster care annually.
• Adoption through foster care is often unpredictable.
• Foster parents must guard their hearts due to impermanence.
• Congruent planning can put pressure on foster parents.
• Unity in marriage is crucial for decision-making.
• Children in the home should be a top consideration.
• Not every foster child is meant to be adopted.
• Peace in decision-making is a sign of God's will.
• Listening to your body's stress signals is important.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by author and adoptive mama, Jessica Mathisen. In light of Foster Care Awareness Month, we discuss Jessica’s profound journey into foster care and adoption. We dive into unique family dynamics, the calling to foster care, the challenges faced by foster parents, and the importance of community support. It is crucial there is unity in marriage before stepping into this calling because the support and foundation is needed when facing the emotional, mental, and sometimes physical demands of this calling.  

Our conversation also turns to emotional complexities that come with fostering or adopting such as facing infertility. Jessica shares her personal experiences and insights, providing encouragement and practical advice for those considering or currently navigating the foster care system. Jessica shares her journey through foster care and adoption, discussing the challenges and joys of welcoming children into her home. She emphasizes the importance of community support, the need for older children in care, and the reality of disruptions in foster placements. Jessica also highlights the significance of trusting God's plan and finding joy amidst the challenges. Additionally, she introduces her new children's book, 'No Matter Where I Go,' which aims to provide resources and support for families navigating foster care. 

Here are a few takeaways: 

• Every foster parent has a unique story and experience.
• Motherhood can be defined by love, not biology.
• Building a care team can ease the journey of fostering. 
• Foster care and adoption are not solutions for infertility.
• It's important to involve children in the family mission of fostering.
• Older children in care, especially teenagers, need loving homes.
• Seeing a child in need can change perceptions and reduce fear.
• Disruption in foster care can be necessary for safety.
• Children in foster care still love their biological families.

Learn more about Jessica Mathisen: https://www.jessicanmathisen.com/ 

Connect with Jessica Mathisen: https://www.instagram.com/jessicanmathisen/ 

Her new book and excellent resource for families: click here

Christian Parenting’s Faith Centered Gift Guide: https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/gifts/ 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Scott Fuller, vice president of advancement at Murphy Harpst Children's Centers. We discuss the importance of community support in foster care, the various programs offered by Murphy Harpst, and share inspiring stories of transformation in the lives of children who have experienced trauma. 

Scott emphasizes the need for churches and families to step up and support these vulnerable children, highlighting the role of mental health resources and the importance of seeking help without shame. 

Here are a few takeaways: 

• Community involvement is crucial for the success of foster care. 
• Children who have experienced trauma can heal with the right support.
• Foster families need ongoing community support to thrive.
• There are many resources available for families in need of help.
• Churches have a responsibility to care for vulnerable children.
• Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
• Every individual can contribute to making a difference in a child's life.

Murphy Harpst website: https://murphyharpst.org/ 

“We don’t all do the same thing, but we can all do something.” -Scott Fuller. 

Reach out to your church or local nonprofits to get involved. Share this podcast and spread awareness. Let’s rise up as the body of Christ and pour out the love of God to these kids! 

Christian Parenting’s Faith Centered Gift Guide: https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/gifts/ 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Tanner Olson. Tanner said when he went to college he knew he was picking a major where he would end up poor and it was a matter of how. He bounced around until finally landing on spoken word poetry and writing. Today, he performs his spoken word poetry with friends who play music, in an effort to communicate God’s heart to the listening ears. Tanner is also the proud father of his adopted son, Judah. 

Together, we explore grief, adoption, and the power of prayer. Tanner shares his personal journey through infertility, leading to the adoption of his son. They discuss the importance of storytelling and how words can heal, as well as the significance of teaching children to pray. Tanner introduces his new children's book, 'All the Things I Say to God,' which aims to help families facilitate conversations about prayer and faith. Our discussion emphasizes the complexities of emotions in the face of grief and the beauty of trusting in God's timing. 

Here are a few takeaways: 

• Prayer can be a simple, honest conversation with God.
• Grief can be a powerful teacher in faith.
• Children can learn to pray anytime, anywhere.
• Storytelling can heal and connect us.
• Adoption brings both joy and challenges.
• It's okay to hold multiple emotions at once.
• God's timing is perfect, even when it feels late.

Get your copy of “All the Things I Say to God” https://www.amazon.com/All-Things-Say-God-Learning/dp/0310165954 

Tanner’s website https://www.writtentospeak.com/ 

Follow him on Instagram @writtentospeak 

Christian Parenting’s Faith Centered Gift Guide: https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/gifts/ 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

I am joined by Terri Marcroft. Terri Marcroft is an adoptive mom, author, and adoption advocate who works hard spreading the word on adoption through Unplanned Good. In 2008 Terri identified the need to more actively suggest adoption: today only 1% of young US women facing unplanned pregnancy choose adoption for their babies, while there are almost two million couples in the US hoping to adopt. After ten gratifying years of parenthood and twenty-five in high tech marketing & communications, Terri founded Unplanned Good in 2010. Terri leads the Unplanned Good efforts to encourage young women facing unwanted pregnancy to consider making an adoption plan.

In our conversation, we explain what open adoption is, why it's so beneficial for everyone: birth-parents, babies, and the adoptive family. Terri also highlights the importance of education on this topic, spreading awareness, and how people can be involved in their local communities because 1 in 4 girls will have an unplanned pregnancy from ages 14 to 20. That means this is happening in your community–it could be next door. With so many babies needing homes and so many homes wanting babies, it is imperative that we as the Church work to bring these two together.

Here are a few takeaways:

● Less than 1% of women facing unplanned pregnancies choose adoption.

● Open adoption allows birth mothers to make informed choices.

● Transparency in adoption benefits everyone involved.

● Community support is crucial for women facing unplanned pregnancies.

● Education about adoption can change societal perceptions.

● Legislative advocacy can improve adoption processes.

● Encouraging open conversations about adoption is essential.

● Adoption is a loving choice, not a loss.

Learn more about Unplanned Good: https://www.unplannedgood.org/

Christian Parenting’s Faith Centered Gift Guide: https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/gifts/

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Kimberly Dubose. Kimberly is a Family Centered Therapy Clinical Caseworker with Connected Families. She shares her expertise on managing challenging behaviors in children, particularly those who have experienced trauma. She emphasizes the importance of caregivers in modeling self-regulation and establishing healthy boundaries. Our discussion covers practical tools for emotional regulation, the significance of resilience in children, and the need for open communication about emotions. Kimberly also addresses the complexities of anger management and the role of community support in caregiving. Ultimately, she offers you encouragement and reminds you of the vital work you do and the importance of seeking help when needed.

Here are a few takeaways: 

• Healthy authority is essential for building trust and connection.
• Children can be very resilient when provided with consistent support.
• Practicing regulation techniques when calm is more effective.
• Caregivers should model self-regulation for their children.
• Emotional language helps children express their feelings better.
• Anger often masks deeper emotions like sadness.
• Providing options during anger can help de-escalate situations.
• Community support is vital for caregivers.
• Caregivers should give themselves grace and seek help.

Here is the resource Kimberly referenced: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fTzXFPh6CPI 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined with the amazing author and adoptive mom, Dorian Stewart. Dorian has written the “Promise Pals” series, which was envisioned when she realized there weren’t many resources and books out there for adopted kids. Adopted kids are just as much chosen and wanted as biological children, especially since we are all adopted by our Heavenly Father. This is something Dorian and her husband wanted to strongly emphasize with their daughter. In our conversation, we discuss exactly how they enforced positive messaging for their child, how they prayed for their daughter’s biological family, and how to answer the hard questions their child asks. 

Here are a few takeaways: 

• The journey of adoption can be seen as God's divine blueprint.
• Positive affirmations are crucial for building confidence in children.
• Infusing God's truth into daily life helps children understand their identity.
• Creating safe spaces for children to ask questions is essential.
• Adoption should be framed as a loving choice, not a rejection.

You can learn more and connect with Dorian Stewart on social media and find her books! 

https://www.facebook.com/dorian.mcdonald.90/ 

https://www.instagram.com/de_stewarts/

https://www.amazon.com/stores/Dorian-Stewart/author/B08WM36MJP?ref=dbs_a_mng_rwt_scns_share%3Flanguage%3Des&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true&ccs_id=0127f328-2b6f-40e9-8dfc-6321bf6506c9 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined with an incredible guest: Lisa C. Qualls. Lisa is the proud mother of both biological and adopted children, twelve in fact, and is an accomplished author, speaker, and Enneagram coach with TBRI training. Together, we focus on the concept of 'blocked care'—a self-protective mechanism that can hinder emotional connection between parents and children. 

Lisa shares her personal journey into adoption, the challenges faced, and the development of her ministry aimed at supporting adoptive and foster families. We discuss the neuroscience behind blocked care, signs to recognize it, and the importance of acknowledging these feelings to begin healing and reconnecting with children. Our conversation helps explain the concept of blocked care, its effects on parents, and practical strategies for overcoming it. We discuss the importance of understanding the nervous system, building supportive relationships, and finding hope through simple practices like breath prayer. We emphasize the need for self-care and the significance of recognizing beauty in everyday life as a means to combat feelings of overwhelm and despair. A great and practical technique is “YAHWEH” breathing, because sometimes we simply don’t have words when we are so depleted. 

Here are a few takeaways: 

• Blocked care is a common experience among adoptive parents.
• Parents often feel shame for not feeling the love they expected.
• Acknowledging blocked care is the first step to healing.
• The Connected Child was a pivotal resource for many adoptive parents.
• Parenting children with trauma requires ongoing support and education.
• It's important to find community and resources to navigate the challenges of adoption. 
• Caring for the nervous system is essential for recovery.
• Simple activities like walking can help regulate the nervous system.
• Sleep is crucial for managing stress and blocked care.
• Negativity bias can hinder our ability to see joy and beauty.

You can learn more and connect with Lisa C. Qualls with these resources:

https://www.lisacqualls.com/

https://www.instagram.com/lisacqualls/?hl=en

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by a very special guest! I first met Allison when she taught at an adoption support group last Fall, and I just knew she had to be on the podcast! Allison is a trauma informed sleep expert, something which did not exist when she was raising her adopted son who struggled at night. Needless to say, sleep is crucial for everyone’s health–physical, mental, and emotional! Yet sleep is not something we as parents fully understand and that is why this episode is so important. 

Together, Allison and I emphasize the importance of understanding the emotional and psychological aspects of sleep, shifting parental mindsets, and providing children with tools to help them feel safe and secure at bedtime. We discuss the complexities of parenting, particularly in the context of sleep issues faced by children. We explore the importance of consistency in parenting, the need for trial and error in finding effective strategies, and the significance of creating a safe and comforting sleep environment. We also address the impact of sleep deprivation on both children and parents, emphasizing the necessity of community support and self-care for caregivers. We highlight the emotional challenges faced by parents, particularly those in foster care and adoption, and offer practical advice for building confidence and reframing expectations in the parenting journey. 

I learned so much from Allison and I know you will too! So many eye-opening points which help me reframe my understanding of sleep and trauma, and how the two are connected. Here are a few key takeaways: 

-Sleep is a vulnerable act for children, especially those with trauma.

-Understanding the emotional triggers around sleep is crucial.

-Parents should shift their mindset from discipline to support during sleep struggles.

-Adding tools to a child's sleep routine can help them feel more secure.

-It's important to view sleep as an opportunity for bonding and connection.

-Children need time to adjust to new environments and routines.

-Parents should approach sleep challenges with compassion and understanding.

-Building trust takes time and consistency in sleep routines . 

I am so glad you’ve decided to join us today! Below are ways to connect with Allison:

https://www.dwellpediatricsleep.com/about-me 

https://www.instagram.com/dwellpediatricsleep/ 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Della Lago, an adoptive mom and  advocate for how Christians everywhere can play a role in supporting teens in the foster care system. Della shares her personal journey of adopting a 17-year-old girl from a group home, discussing the challenges and triumphs of building trust and connection. Our conversation highlights the realities faced by teens aging out of foster care, the importance of community support, and the need for a safe space for these youth to dream and thrive.

 Della emphasizes that every child deserves a family and encourages listeners to step up and make a difference. She also shares the importance of understanding trauma, the need for community support, and the role of faith in the healing process. Together, we provide practical advice for families considering foster care and highlights the significance of being open to unexpected joys and connections that come with this journey. 

I am so glad you’ve decided to join us today! Below are resources from Della to learn more:  

https://nationalcasagal.org/ 

https://bethany.org/

https://enotahcasa.org/ 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Whitney Newby, author of the new book “Lift Your Eyes: Daily Invitations to Behold Christ in Motherhood”, founder of Brighter Day Press, and a homeschooling mom of four. Whitney joins me to talk about the challenges and beauty of motherhood, particularly in the context of foster care and adoption. 

Whitney shares insights from her upcoming devotional based on Psalm 121, emphasizing God's attributes as a source of comfort and strength for mothers. Our conversation highlights the importance of relying on God for help and rest amidst the demands of parenting. Together, we explore the challenges of motherhood, emphasizing the importance of faith in God's provision, overcoming feelings of failure and comparison, and finding stillness amidst the chaos. We also offer practical ways to lift our eyes to Christ and incorporate biblical truths into daily rhythms, encouraging mothers to trust in God's promises and create an atmosphere of worship in their homes.

Here are a few takeaways: 

-Psalm 121 is a comforting scripture for mothers.

-God's attributes provide strength and reassurance in motherhood.

-Jesus invites us to find rest in Him amidst our weariness.

-God's grace is sufficient for us in our weaknesses.

-We need to lean on God as our helper and provider. Leaning into faith in God's provision is essential for mothers.

-Comparison can lead to feelings of isolation and guilt.

-Living out our faith in front of our children is impactful.

Connect with Whitney: 

Website

New book

Instagram

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I discuss the challenges and realities of waiting for adoption. The most important thing is trusting God during this process and part of that is managing expectations and actively engaging in the waiting process through praise, seeking God, and serving others. Throughout today’s conversation, I want to encourage you with scripture and my own experience as someone who struggles to wait. 

Here are a few takeaways: 

-Waiting is a part of life and a valuable experience.

-Impatience is a common struggle, not limited to modern society.

-The average wait time for adoption can be lengthy and unpredictable.

-Adoption often involves the reality of broken families.

-We can control our expectations, how we wait, and what we do while we wait.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I discuss what to do and how to respond to the choices our adopted or foster children make. This topic is one of the first inspirations for this podcast as many families have asked me what to do when a situation arises where your child is making problematic, concerning, even destructive and harmful choices.

It is important to always remember that God is in control and we cannot control our children. Even in the most loving Christian homes, children will be led astray and make bad choices. The question in this episode is how do we respond to it in a loving and protective way. I encourage you to acknowledge your weakness, embrace your role as the parent, and understand that your child’s choices do not define you as a parent, nor do they define your child. 

Here’s a few key takeaways you’ll find in this episode: 

-Trusting God is essential when facing challenges in parenting.

-Parents should not lose confidence in their role due to children's choices.

-Love should be confident and not fearful.

-It's okay to acknowledge weaknesses and seek support from God.

-Perfection in parenting is unrealistic; mistakes will happen.

-Children's identities are not defined by their parents' successes or failures.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I discuss the complex and multifaceted issue of trusting God in the face of abusive situations within the foster care system. This episode topic was inspired by a listener’s question - this is a very real issue that so many foster parents face. That is why this episode is focused on some practical advice and how to lean into the Lord when we don’t understand the “why” behind these situations. I emphasize the importance of focusing on what can be controlled, such as prayer and education, while advocating for children's rights and safety. 

It is incredibly important that foster and adoptive parents provide a safe environment, create a safety plan, and be a voice for the children in their care. Empower these children beyond their trauma and trust in God's sovereignty over their circumstances. 

Here’s a few key takeaways you’ll find in this episode: 

-Focus on what you CAN control (Like prayer! Specific prayer!)

-Teach your children proper body anatomy, safe touch, and boundaries with adults 

-KNOW your rights as foster and adoptive parents! 

If the children in your care do not have a history of sexual abuse, it is still super important to stay informed and create a safety plan to prevent it. I hope this episode has been empowering and informative. 

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I discuss what it means to trust God with what we cannot control when it comes to adoption and foster care. I am honest with you, sharing my personal journey through failed adoptions, especially my emotional struggles. I wrestled a lot but also learned about control, God's sovereignty, and the importance of relationship over results. Even when you succeed in adopting your child, it isn’t a fairytale “...and they lived happily ever after…” Part of my story is how I cared for a traumatized baby who screamed every single night because she was separated from her birth mama. 

Here’s a few key takeaways you’ll find in this episode: 

-Failed adoption is NOT cruelty or punishment from God! 

-Failed adoption does NOT mean that God isn’t in control! 

-Failed adoption does NOT mean you have missed your calling! 

-To walk through failed adoptions, can teach you a lot about the adoption system, yourself, and God. 

-This is about a relationship, not a result. 

Ask yourself this as you wrestle failed adoptions:

*Am I closer to God because of this? 

*Have I grown in Biblical wisdom and knowledge because of this? 

*Do I have new insight and opportunities that I wouldn’t have if I hadn’t said “yes” to this calling? 

*Has my understanding of God’s ultimate fulfillment to His plan changed? 

I hope this has been an encouraging episode! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this powerful episode, I am fortunate enough to welcome back advocate, speaker, author, and foster mom Tori Hope Petersen. Drawing from her journey through foster homes, aging out of the system at 18, and overcoming labels like "self-sabotager," Tori shares how destructive patterns rooted in past trauma can be recognized and broken.

This conversation dives into the challenges of foster and adoptive parenting, offering encouragement to love and guide children in survival mode with grace and perseverance. Tori emphasizes the importance of living with integrity, proclaiming biblical truth over oneself and others, and trusting God’s timing for healing. We also explore why dysfunction often feels familiar, the power of rewriting personal narratives, and how to embrace healthy relationships with resilience and faith.

Whether you’re a foster or adoptive parent or navigating personal challenges, this episode offers wisdom, practical tools, and faith-filled encouragement to break free from cycles that hold you back and embrace a life of hope and healing.

To learn more about Tori, her work, and her resources click here. 

You can also purchase her book Fostered or preorder her upcoming book Breaking the Patterns That Break You.

She is on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok with the handle @ToriHopePetersen. 

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this powerful and heartfelt episode, I get to dive into a topic of deep significance: the sanctity of life and the journey of redemption after abortion. I am joined by Robin Gerblick who is the founder of the Exodus Women’s Retreat, author of Giving Up Grace, and an adoptive mom. 

Robin candidly shares her journey from a point of crisis, navigating feelings of abandonment and loss, to finding profound healing through faith, grace, and forgiveness. We discuss the emotional, physical, and spiritual consequences of abortion, shedding light on the real struggles women face and the importance of creating a safe, grace-filled space for them to heal. Robin also shares practical insights for adoptive and foster parents seeking to minister to women in crisis and children from difficult backgrounds.

This episode is a call to Christian parents to understand the complexities women face in times of crisis and explore how to extend grace-filled support. Whether you carry abortion as part of your story, or you're parenting children touched by these realities, Robin’s testimony is a beacon of hope and a reminder of the redemptive power of God’s love.

You can learn more about Robin and her work here. 

Her book Giving Up Grace: A Spiritual Rebranding of the Soul can be found on a wide variety of sites such as Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Redemptive Press. 

Other resources mentioned include the Exodus Women’s Retreat and Focus on the Family Post-Abortion Resources. 

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this powerful episode, I had the opportunity to sit down with Bradley Pierce, attorney and co-founder of Abolish Abortion Texas, to discuss the church’s role in addressing the issue of abortion. We explore the challenges faced by pro-life advocates, the importance of equal protection legislation, and how the body of Christ can truly step up to make a difference for the unborn.

Bradley unpacks the resistance to equal protection laws, even within pro-life circles, and shares insights from his experience drafting and advocating for abolitionist legislation across the U.S. We highlight practical ways Christians can engage, from educating themselves and influencing legislation to supporting families and fostering meaningful conversations within their communities.

This episode is a call to action for believers to live as "living sacrifices" and step boldly into their role as defenders of life. Whether it’s advocating for change in the legal system or offering tangible support to families, everyone has a part to play in this fight for life.

Let’s move from simply saying we are pro-life to living it out with conviction, compassion, and purpose.

You can watch the "Abortion-Free" docuseries here to learn more about the current state of abortion, biblical perspectives, and actionable steps for individuals and churches.

Learn more about Bradley Pierce and his work at Abolish Abortion Texas or Foundation to Abolish Abortion. 

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Dr. Nicole Wilke, author and director at the Christian Alliance for Orphans Center on Applied Research for Vulnerable Children and Families. Nicole helps to explore the powerful intersection of scripture and science in building resilience in children and families.

Her passion for helping vulnerable children and connecting research with frontline practice shines through as she discusses her new book, Overcoming: What Scripture and Science Say About Resilience. We discuss practical ways for parents, caregivers, and communities to become agents of change and support children through adversity.

Nicole's books are available for purchase from Amazon or the Christian Alliance for Orphans page. 

Here's where you can learn more about Nicole and the Christian Alliance for Orphans. 

She is also present on Linkedin and Instagram. 

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

As 2024 comes to a close, Somer wants to highlight one of the best episodes from this year -- in case you missed it!

Often people think infertility leads to adoption. It isn't always the case, but it can be for some. Joined with Somer on the podcast are authors Jenn Hesse and Kelley Ramsey who were connected from miles apart thanks to social media. They both share similar infertility stories which is what dawned their friendship and eventually collaborating on this book, "Waiting in Hope: 31 Reflections for Walking with God Through Infertility"

In this episode, they tackle the emotional rollercoaster that is infertility. There is hope and there is pain, and it can be isolating. Kelley and Jenn remind us how important marriage is, community, and leaning into God who has the plan we may not understand.

Something beautiful can come from this grief, and something beautiful can also be different from what we expect.

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

Somer would love to connect with you on Instagram or send you a monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

As 2024 comes to a close, Somer wants to share the best from this year. This episode is a 2024 highlight, to make sure you didn't miss it! The conversation is about how hard isn't the same as bad, and we all know how hard adoption and foster care is.

Joined with Somer on this insightful conversation is the author "M is for Mama" Abbie Halberstadt. Abbie is the busy mom of ten kiddos who also finds time to encourage Christian mamas in their calling of motherhood. As moms, we are laying the foundation for our kids to know Christ; it is a heavy responsibility but one we can do with God on our side.

Somer and Abbie talk about the hardship of parenting, and how that relates to adoption and foster care. Whether you're parenting adopted, foster, or your own biological children, its all hard! And hard is where God grows us.

So glad you're here to join us!

Link to:

Abbie's Instagram

Abbie's website

Abbie's new book "Hard is Not the Same as Bad"

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This is a special episode where Somer shares clips from the five most downloaded, most popular episodes from Called to Love thus far:

1. Reframing Your Mindset As A Christian Adoptive Parent: Reflect on Your Calling
2. Lessons Learned in Our Adoption Journey with Somer & Corey
3. Everything You Need to Know from an Adoption Attorney (featuring Lucrece Bundy)
4. Listener Q & A: Am I Really Called to Adopt or Foster? 
5. Understanding God's Heart for Adoption and Foster Care with Tim Wolkiewicz

As the year closes, it is the perfect time to reflect on everything God has done and God has done great things for this podcast. Somer hopes and prays this show has been a blessing for you and a valuable resource! She is crafting a series for 2025 titled, "The Lies Adoptive and Foster Parents Believe" and she needs your help! Submit that "lie" the enemy is whispering in your ear so Somer can help point you towards God's truth.

You can email your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

Somer wants to connect with you on Instagram or send you her monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am focused on talking about our neurodivergent kiddos, whether they're our biological ones, adopted, or being fostered. "Neurodivergent" has been a popular term in the past few years but what does it mean? And how do we love our kids well when we struggle to understand them? I explore all of this and other ways to regulate the big feelings and much more in this episode.

And please reach out to me with your questions, comments, and especially your "lies" that you've experienced as an adoptive or foster parent, for a series I am doing in the New Year.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am focused on talking about how to help our kids with holiday anxiety. Christmas is quickly approaching and maybe you've already experienced some the holiday stress with this past Thanksgiving. There is so much overstimulating our kids, from school activities, sugary sweets, family and friends gathering, and so much more... and with all this stress, anxiety and overstimulation can come the fights, tantrums, and big feelings that can even cause us to burst out in anger. So, how do we manage all of this? In this episode, I offer my recommendations from my personal experience and research. I hope you greatly benefit from what I have to share!

And please reach out to me with your questions, comments, and especially your "lies" that you've experienced as an adoptive or foster parent, for a series I am doing in the New Year.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Christmas is quickly coming around the corner which is why I thought this would be a great opportunity to talk with Donna Amidon about the connection between Jesus and the Old Testament, how God is the same through all the ages and the promise of Jesus is woven throughout scripture.

As foster and adoptive parents, the holidays can be challenging and one thing that can be stabilizing is having some family traditions. One thing that Donna talks about is the Jesse Tree, something she didn't realize was having an impact on her daughter. We can plant seeds in our kids and not see the fruit till years later which is why it is so important to persevere and keep planting!

Here's a link to Donna's book: Tracing His Promise: Understanding the Bigger Story of Jesus and What That Means for Us

Here's where you can learn more about Donna: her website, click here!

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This is such an important episode because there is such a stigma around adopting older children. Joined with me on this important conversation of breaking-down, understanding, and destigmatizing the need for older child adoption is an amazing expert from the field, Dr. Kimberly Offutt.

Dr. Kimberly Offutt is an adopted mom herself who's first adopted child was eight years old, and has welcomed more children since then. She has been a part of Bethany.org for years and shares her experiences with the organization along with her personal stories. Here's the truth: adoption will break you, but it's also a sanctifying process where God refines you. It is hard and that is why it is so important to be aligned with your spouse and surrounded by a support system.

Dr. Kimberly Offutt's resource: Bethany.org

The book she continued referencing in the episode, "The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog"

The podcast episode Somer references: "Safeguarding What is Sacred: Keeping Your Marriage Strong as Foster and Adoptive Parents"

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined with Brandie Thomas who shares her incredible story about the unique relationship her family has with her adopted son's bio mother. Adoption is an inherently painful and beautiful process; beautiful in how we are able to give a child a loving home and painful in the separation of a child from their biological family. Brandie talks honestly about this pain and what she would have done differently in another open adoption and shares a lot about her experience in this process.

You can follow Brandie on Instagram, check out her website, or the new book she's a part of, "Restore My Soul: Stories of Redemption, Deliverance, and Hope."

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined with two amazing guests who are on the other side of their adoption journeys: Jodi Jackson Tucker & Lisa Qualls. They each share their stories and how they ended up adopting and all the ups and downs along the way, and they emphasize the need for healing when it comes to this calling.

No matter which way you look at it, adoption is traumatic. While it is beautiful and sanctifying to open up your home and heart to a child in need, it doesn't mean there isn't heartbreak in the fact the child could not be with their biological parents. As Christian adoptive parents and foster parents, we especially need to acknowledge this heartache which can help us better understand what our child is experiencing. There is also so much healing, redemptive, and sanctifying power that comes with this calling... but it's also hard and we need Jesus every step of the way!

To learn more about Jodi Jackson Tucker, click here!

To learn more about Lisa Qualls, click here!

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Adoption Wise ministry, including free Blocked Care Webinar:

Second Mothers ministry with bookshelf of resources:

Pre-Order/Order: Healing for Every Heart in Adoption

Buy the book now!

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined with Rachel Wojo for this discussion on the desperate prayers we have as adoptive parents. Rachel's story is full of grief, trauma, love, loss, and Christ holding her together tenderly. In this conversation, Rachel shares her story and how we can pray when we don't even have the words...

You can buy her book "Desperate Prayers: Embracing the Power of Prayer in Life's Darkest Moments" by clicking this link.

You can learn more about Rachel from her website!

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Cynthia Baker. Cynthia is life-coach, speaker, and author, and sparks today's conversation on being a helipad parent as opposed to a helicopter parent.

You're probably familiar with the term "helicopter parent." A parent that is always "hovering" over their child, anxiously trying to control everything around them so nothing "bad" happens. But the truth is bad stuff is going to happen to them, the question is are they prepared to handle it? Being a helipad means being there for them when they need it.

When it comes to fostering and adopting kids, they especially need us to be safe spaces that let them feel all the feelings (good and bad). Cynthia shares her insight as both a life-coach but also someone in a unique situation raising a child that isn't hers biologically.

You can learn more about Cynthia from her website!

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Brandon Stiver. Brandon has worn many hats but has one vocation: to see God’s Kingdom come to Earth through proclamation and demonstration. A respected leader in the field of global care for children, Brandon is a professor, a podcaster and has led in nonprofits based in the US and in Tanzania. A community builder at heart, he has collaborated with organizations from Central America to Southeast Asia.

Together, we unpack some of the ways people can get involved with foster and adoption without necessarily adopting or fostering. We are all called to love the widows and the orphans, but there are different ways God can use us to do that work. Also, Brandon tells us about the struggles of international adoption and what is the definition of an orphan.

You can connect to Brandon on LinkedIn and learn more about him here!

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Sally Clarkson. Sally has written several books and her most recent release is titled, "Well Lived: Shaping a Legacy of Gratitude and Grace" which sparks today's conversation on how to live well as adoptive and foster parents.

Let's be real... this calling is a hard one, there are tons of challenges, stressors, and things which make us feel defeated and deflated. How do we live well in this calling? Sally shares some of her story and experience with living well while caring for her children with special needs. She encourages us with knowing there is so much love and grace from the Father and it's okay to be human...

Click here to learn more about Sally from her website!

Click here to follow her on Instagram!

Click here to buy her new book!

So glad you're here to join us! You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Billie Jauss who sparks today's conversation with the release of her new book: "Baseball Family: The 9 Core Qualities for Developing Healthy Relationships." Billie shares her story of raising her three boys in a busy season of being married to a professional baseball coach and on top of it all -- fostering! Billie has a lot of stories and experiences that she shares in this episode along with those nine core qualities for developing healthy relationships.

Click here to check out her book!

Click here to follow her on Instagram!

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Courtney Seibring who sparks today's conversation with the release of her new book, "Every Body Wonderfully Made: God's Good Plan for Boys and Girls." Together, Courtney and I talk about how our adopted kids may recognize how different they look from the rest of the family and we need to remind them of how wonderfully they're made!

A resource from Courtney, click here!

A link to Courtney's website, click here.

You can follow her on social media.

And here's her brand new book!

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined by Amanda Erickson. Amanda and her husband Dr. David Erickson are the founders of Flourishing Homes & Families. They equip and empower Christian parents to lead their families with grace and gentleness through parenting principles that are rooted in the teaching of Jesus and backed by modern neuroscience. Along the way, they have cultivated a community of parents in the trenches, guiding them towards being peacemakers in their home, and offering practical tools for parenting with Jesus at the center.

Together, Amanda and I talk about the power of neuroscience and how God has made our human bodies and minds to work. Understanding how we process our emotions, how our kids process them, makes us better parents!

Amanda and David's new book: The Flourishing Family: A Jesus-Centered Guide to Parenting with Peace and Purpose

You can follow them on social media. Click the link.

And you can check out their website!

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am sharing what I have learned and experienced with blocked care. Blocked care is a physical reaction our body undergoes when it is enduring too much stress. It's something God has designed in us as a self-protective measure. But when we are in the adoption and foster care journey, we are often over-taxed and stressed... so how do we cope with blocked care when we're fulfilling God's calling in our life?

I share more information about blocked care, what it means to have a blank slate, white space, anchors, self-regulation, and more so you can feel more equipped to handle this burden.

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Adoption, however, is not as easy as it sounds, and even after you bring home that child there is still a lot of trauma to walk through and challenges ahead. Jep and Jessica share their story and offer encouragement, and share how having a strong support system and a strong marriage make all the difference.

Plus, Jep and Jessica want to share this amazing resource for you and your family! A brand new, interactive book about a tiger named Valor who's adopted. Learn more about the book by clicking this link.

You can also learn more about the organization Jep works for called All God's Children.

And you can follow them on social media!

If you're new to this podcast, I just want to say welcome!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this two-part series, Bethany shares part of her story with foster care and the heartache that comes with it... but also the incredible God-filled joy. They also discuss the need for not just people who "love you" but people who "get you" and what the difference is. They also the discuss the refining power of this calling and how it changed her and her husband.

You can learn more about Bethany on her website or Instagram, and check out her podcast and YouTube channel!

If you're new to this podcast, I just want to say welcome!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this two-part series, Bethany shares part of her story with fostercare and the heartache that comes with it... but also the incredible God-filled joy. They also discuss the need for not just people who "love you" but people who "get you" and what the difference is. They also the discuss the refining power of this calling and how it changed her and her husband.

You can learn more about Bethany on her website or Instagram, and check out her podcast and YouTube channel!

If you're new to this podcast, I just want to say welcome!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

When Ben Locke was in his darkest valleys, he was determined to tell God exactly what he thought. He poured out his agony and anger--and was met with God's grace, love, forgiveness, and mercy. He discovered in those moments that God can handle it. All of it.

In this episode, Somer and Ben discuss how the church should handle sexual abuse, some of the signs to watch out for as parents, and the deep hope there is in Christ through this suffering.

You can get your copy of Ben's book here on Amazon or wherever you find your books!

So glad you're here to join us!

If you're new to this podcast, I just want to say welcome!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Tim is a very talented animator who has worked on Veggietales, Hasbro’s “Transformers Rescue Bots,” Warner Brother’s “Green Eggs and Ham,” and Disney’s “Monsters At Work." He is also passionate about adoption and foster care. Him and his wife both fostered and adopted children, two of which internationally. With this passion, he created a children's activity book specifically for adopted and foster kids called "The Flock."

In this episode, Tim and I discuss:

• His family's story and how they came into this calling
• How important it is for both husband and wife to be on board for this calling
• How this calling doesn't just impact the child you're adopting or fostering, but it has an impact on the bio family and social workers and more.

Tim also encourages us to find support groups, trust God, and be in a church body that raises you up in this calling, "it takes a church."

There is a lot on the plates of foster and adoptive parents. In many ways, they take on several hats, becoming therapists, lawyers, taxi drivers, just with all the appointments and paperwork to navigate... and with this stress comes burn out and with burn out comes tension in the household. That is why it is so important to be supported by family, friends, and church.

Through all of it, God is at work: you are not alone.

Check out Tim's new interactive comic book: The Flock here on his Etsy store.

You can also connect with him about the book via email: theflock127@gmail.com

Or connect with him on social media or his website.

So glad you're here to join us!

If you're new to this podcast, I just want to say welcome!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

I hope you enjoyed the Refresh episodes with Kelly Hamilton as much as I did! If we're being honest, the summer season is not always full of fun and relaxation... in fact, it can be hard, lacking consistency, and stressful! That's why I wanted to pause and remind myself of those tools for behavior and emotional regulation, and these tools have been personally helpful for me in my family as I get overwhelmed.

In this episode, I talk about some resources which I have found extremely helpful during this season and I am encouraging you to find rest, find margin for God, and remember that God is in this with you.

The Colbert family has recently experienced a failed placement, and that is something I also share with you in this episode. God's faithfulness with us in this season has been so powerful and I hope this encourages you, in whatever stage you're at in this calling...

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of "The Connected Life." She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of "The Connected Life." She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of "The Connected Life." She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

In this second part of our conversation, Kelly Hamilton and I are tackling the attachment styles. Being aware and mindful of our own attachment styles and the styles of our children make a big impact on that growing connection with our child, whether they're biological or adopted. Developing your relationship with your child is a lifelong commitment and there is so much hope for reconciliation and healing, even if its hard and ugly.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of "The Connected Life." She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

In this first part of our conversation, we are tackling the definition of "mindfulness" and why it is so important for our parenting, especially when it comes to adoption and foster care where kids are entering our homes with intense emotions. We have to be able to regulate and demonstrate that regulation to these kids, help them build healthy, secure attachments, and be purposeful (not reactive) in our parenting.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, I am tackling a question submitted from a listener. I am unpacking what certain behaviors mean, how to tell if its "trauma or drama." Let's be honest, kids can act out for a number of reasons and we need to know how to respond appropriately.

In this episode, I go over a variety of behaviors, signs, things for you to look out for, and give you some tools for your own responses to these situations with your child. I hope to empower you with this insight so you can continue serving this calling well!

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, I am joined by Dr. Gary Chapman. Gary is an author, speaker, and counselor— and he has a passion for people and for helping them form lasting relationships. He is the bestselling author of The 5 Love Languages® series and the director of Marriage and Family Life Consultants, Inc. Gary Travels the world presenting seminars, and his radio programs air on more than 400 stations.

In this conversation, we talk about how important it is as adoptive and foster families to build these strong, healthy families. Notably, it's important for the mom and dad as a married, united couple to remember their family started with them and their sacred covenant, and they are modeling behaviors to every child in their home. Dr. Gary has a lot of wisdom for us!

So glad you're here to join us!

Link to:

Dr Chapman's Facebook

Dr Chapman's book, "5 Traits of a Healthy Family"

Dr Chapman's website

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, I am joined by author "M is for Mama" Abbie Halberstadt. Abbie is the busy mom of ten kiddos who also finds time to encourage Christian mamas in their calling of motherhood. As moms, we are laying the foundation for our kids to know Christ; it is a heavy responsibility but one we can do with God on our side.

In this conversation, we talk about the hardship of parenting, and how that relates to adoption and foster care. Whether you're parenting adopted, foster, or your own biological children, its all hard! And hard is where God grows us.

So glad you're here to join us!

Link to:

Abbie's Instagram

Abbie's website

Abbie's new book "Hard is Not the Same as Bad"

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, our special guest is an attorney to help us answer all the legal and financial questions: Lucrece Bundy. Lucrece always had a passion for helping children but didn't expect God would call her to helping children and parents from a legal perspective. Now, she is not only a lawyer advocating for families but has a YouTube channel dedicated to advising parents wanting to answer the call.

In this episode, we cover all those sticky questions: How much is this going to cost? How long is this going to take? How do I jump through these hoops I didn't even know existed!?

We had an incredible conversation and I hope you find it helpful and insightful!

Link to:

Lucrece's YouTube channel

Website

Instagram

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, I am joined with the incredible Jennifer Kritner who shares her powerful story of foster care and adoption.

Jennifer had a difficult time having her two biological sons but then due to some medical challenges, she was given the devastating news that she could no longer have children. Through this heartbreak, God led her to foster care, which was not an easy yes for their family. Through foster care also came adoption, and their family is even more beautiful than ever.

Jennifer and I discuss her story and experience plus practical things you can do to help those in your circles that have said yes to this calling, or what resources and steps to take if you're looking to say "yes" too.

Jennifer's Facebook & Instagram and Unclaimed Baggage organization.

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, I am joined with author, professor, speaker, and mother of three precious adopted children: Dr. Laurel Shaler. Laurel has co-written a book with Dr. Gary Chapman titled "Loving Adopted Children Well: A 5 Love Languages Approach" which has sparked today's conversation.

Laurel and I discuss some of her unique background with adoption which includes a snowflake adoption (where the adoptee mom carries an unwanted embryo to birth herself). We also discuss the ways to love our children when adoption comes inherently with loss and pain.

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, my special guest and I are talking about addressing the tough questions our adopted kids ask. Common ones can be "Why are you my parents?" "Why am I not with my real parents?" and "Why don't I look like you?" "Why am I different?" and so many more. We need to welcome these conversations so our kids feel safe and seen in their own journey which had a challenging start.

Joined with me for this amazing and practical conversation is author Carey Koenig. Her recent book is titled "Do I Belong?" which is the catalyst for this conversation. She has two adopted children who asked her these many questions and she was passionate about creating a resource to help others in this calling.

Click here to learn more about her book!

Click here to check out her online resource for adopted kids!

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, my special guests and I are talking about our adopted child's experience from their perspective. They are going to have a lot of questions about their identity and who they are, and as parents we need to help them navigate this. Joined with me on this are the authors of the book "Whose Am I" Jackie Darby and Axia de Lopez.

Jackie Darby and Axia de Lopez have an incredible story, both in their own journeys to adoption, and how they came together and eventually made this book. Jackie was adopted and Axia is an adoptive mother. Their story is incredible and their insight is eye-opening.

You can learn more about the book by clicking here!

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This week, I am joined with a special guest who has an incredible story that needed sharing. Rebekah Finney has had a long journey to finding God's goodness in adoption and foster care, a story which many of us can relate to or understand how beautiful yet painful this calling is. Rebekah's story is exactly that, full of the pain of miscarriages and yet the beauty of a family in their three adopted children which they fostered.

Join me on this journey as Rebekah shares how God moved in her life through every heartache, the dying to the self, the developing relationships with biological parents, and the sorrow with rejoicing.

You can reach out to Rebekah via email: mattandrebekah654@gmail.com

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Often people think infertility leads to adoption. It isn't always the case, but it can be for some. Joined with me on the podcast are authors Jenn Hesse and Kelley Ramsey who were connected from miles apart thanks to social media. They both share similar infertility stories which is what dawned their friendship and eventually collaborating on this book, "Waiting in Hope: 31 Reflections for Walking with God Through Infertility"

In today's conversation, we tackle the emotional rollercoaster that is infertility. There is hope and there is pain, and it can be isolating. Kelley and Jenn remind us how important marriage is, community, and leaning into God who has the plan we may not understand.

Something beautiful can come from this grief, and something beautiful can also be different from what we expect.

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

It's been a while since it's just been you and me on the podcast. We've had a lot of incredible guests over the past several weeks and I just wanted to take a moment to pause and get into a common struggle with adoption and foster care, and that's how to raise all the siblings together.

I offer you some practical advice, my own rough experience, and hopefully some information with strengthens and encourages you in this calling!

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In this episode, I am joined with pastor, author, and busy mama to five: Jessica Hurlbut. Her new book is, "Unlimited Motherhood: Overcome 12 Limits that Overwhelm and Conflict Our Hearts"

Jessica and her husband Greg are herald as adoption advocates across New York State. After adopting a sibling group of two from foster care in 2015, they discovered the massive need for foster and adoptive parents.

They founded All 4 One Adoption Awareness, an organization focused on highlighting the 110,000 children in foster care who are freed to be adopted and need a forever family. For three years straight, Jessica has promoted and organized a 110 mile run across St. Lawrence County which is held on National Adoption Day to raise awareness for this need.

In today's conversation, we talk about the challenges of motherhood, caring for special needs children, foster-care, adoption--all of the things! Jessica helps us realize the beauty in those hardships and gives us some practical ways to counteract the Enemy's methods of attacking us in these challenges: he isolates us, gets us to resent our spouse, and try to "fix" our kids.

So glad you're here to join us!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Nicole Unice is a bivocational leader, serving both in the ministry and in the marketplace. As a pastor and community leader, Nicole is the author of several books on healthy faith, honing in on the connection between our emotional and spiritual life. She’s the host of How to Study the Bible, a popular weekly podcast that reaches people in 188 different countries in the last year alone, and preaches frequently for conferences and churches.

Her recent book is the catalyst for this conversation, "Not What I Signed Up For." Together, Somer and Nicole discuss the very real and hard feelings you go through in this journey but also the incredible transformation and beauty along with it.

Nicole says when the calling is loud, it's almost always a hard one--just part of how God seems to work! And this calling is hard but it is so powerful, and if we're honest... if you knew how hard it would be, would you have been brave enough to accept the challenge? It's almost a blessing in that way to be ignorant of the storms to come and just trust God will get you through it.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Hillary is the founder and President of Mama Bear Apologetics. She feels a burden for providing accessible apologetics resources for busy moms. She is the chief author and editor of the bestselling books  Mama Bear Apologetics: Empowering Your Kids to Challenge Cultural Lies, Mama Bear Apologetics Guide to Sexuality: Empowering Your Kids to Understand and Live Out God’s Design, and the soon to be released Honest Prayers for Mama Bears. Hillary has her master’s degree in biology and loves helping moms to discern truths and lies in both science and culture. She and her husband, John, have been married for 16 years and minister together as an apologetics team. She can never sneak up on anybody because of her chronic hiccups, which you can hear occasionally on the podcast and in interviews.

Somer asks Hillary "Where do we start?" when it comes to talking about healthy, God-created sexuality with our children and there is so much to unpack. They discuss the many categories we can use to approach addressing sex with our kids, they discuss the importance of naming body parts and not being ashamed to have honest conversations, and they discuss the current climate with sexuality and gender issues.

This topic is so important and as we open up our homes to foster kids or adopting kids, it can be so hard to address but let's talk about it. Thank you so much for being here!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

On average, children spend 52 hours per week on a screen, and approximately 30% of kids in the U.S. today are believers... those are staggering statistics and the harsh reality is kids are being exposed to poison from the big media outlets or from predators online.

If you're welcoming a new child into your home, you may have no idea what they've been exposed to or what their norms are with screen time. As Brent says, it's no different than if a kid comes into your home who had candy bars for breakfast every morning, but laced with arsenic. Screentime isn't just addictive, which science proves, but it is filled with toxicity.

But Brent also cautions us that this doesn't mean we throw all the screens out the window. Kids still need to engage in our world, but in a safe and healthy way. That's why he and his team created TruPlay.

Thank you so much for listening!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Joined with me today is the author and mom of both adopted and bio kids: Sara Hagerty. Sara recently published a book titled "The Gift of Limitations" which sparked this raw conversation about dealing with disappointment in this season of motherhood, naming our emotions, and working through grief.

One thing that resonates is how we can't skip steps to reach contentment. Being content with where we are means truly reckoning with the discomfort and heartache of where we are.

Another powerful reminder is that Jesus was never in a hurry. Jesus was on mission but he also rested. He became flesh here on earth and limited His own power. With limitations, He saved the world...

And finally....Friend, you don't have to be everything. There is so much hope we can find as we surrender all our grief to Him.

Thank you so much for listening!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

We talk about establishing healthy boundaries as partners with our spouse, to be united on this front. We discuss the need for these boundaries for our kids to be not just protected but to prepared for when certain things come up. Additionally, its critical for our kids to become critical thinkers! "Uncomfortable" conversations are a must, and sometimes those talks happen in the car rides, which could be great opportunities.

When you're watching a movie or TV show as a family, ask those critical-thinking questions... which character did you identify with and why? Did they do the right thing? What did you like in this story? And more...

Thank you so much for listening!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

This question is a big one: Am I really called to adopt or foster? It is such a big commitment and there's a lot we can dive into, from the family aspect, spouses being on board, and finances...

And if I am being honest, it's a bit hard to talk about because on the one hand I don't want to scare you away from this calling but I also want to be honest about the reality of challenges you will face when you do answer the call. I am reminded of the story of Moses and how he responded to his calling and now we see him as one of the fathers of the faith. His story is super encouraging and applicable I think to what we face when we may hear God's voice beckoning us to this journey.

Not only do I offer you some encouragement, but in this episode I offer some practical information on the different types of adoption and ways to help finance the process, and how seeking God's wisdom is the most important part.

Thank you so much for listening!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Here to help me unpack this are the authors of the new release, "The Deconstruction of Christianity: What It Is, Why It’s Destructive, and How to Respond" by Alisa Childers and Tim Barnett.

Alisa Childers is a wife, mom, author, and speaker. She was a member of the award-winning CCM recording group ZOEgirl. She is a popular speaker at apologetics and Christian worldview conferences. She is the author of Another Gospel? and Live Your Truth and Other Lies. She has been published at the Gospel Coalition, Crosswalk, the Stream, For Every Mom, Decision Magazine, and the Christian Post.

Tim Barnett has worked as a speaker for Stand to Reason since 2015. He is a dynamic speaker who provides a perfect blend of expertise and humor in each talk. Using easy-to-follow and visually engaging presentations, Tim trains Christians to think clearly about what they believe and why they believe it.

The deconstruction story is powerful. It's like a testimony, except instead of a non believer sharing how they came to Christ, it's the reverse: a Christian turning away from the faith. These people's experiences are often heartbreaking, stories of abuse and misconduct in the church, but then there are those who simply don't like the idea of sin and find it offensive. Instead of deconstruction our faith when we have questions and negative experiences, we should be reforming our faith.... not unlike Martin Luther and others who held the church to the standard of Scripture, which is not what deconstructionists are doing...

There is so much to unpack, so let's dive in together.

Thank you so much for listening!

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com.

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Darby is a counselor, speaker and author with a specialization in trauma and domestic violence. One of her recent books is called "Is It Abuse? A Biblical Guide to Identifying Domestic Abuse and Helping Victims."

Together, we talk about having those tough conversations with our kids, whether biological, adopted, or in foster care, who've experienced trauma. Often these kids grow up into adults, and go through therapy wondering why no one ever talked to them about these things that happened. These conversations are important to the healing process but at the same time uncomfortable and hard to navigate. Darby equips us with some practical tools and information to help us tackle this important area of parenthood.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Nick is the founding and lead pastor of Bright City Church, and he is the author of a book titled "Don't Give Up Just Yet" which sparks today's conversation.

It feels like these days we're all struggling so hard to get through life. Add the calling of adoption or foster care on top of it all and it can feel like too much. When we face resistance in our callings, it may seem like a sign that it wasn't meant to be... but as Nick points out, it could be that the resistance gets stronger the closer we are to the finish line. In our conversation we talk about the struggles we face, the need for true rest and sabbath, and expectations verses expectancy.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Cynthia is an author, podcaster, busy adoptive mom who raised kids in foster care after having her own kids and being a lawyer. Her new book is called, "Life is Messy, God is Good."

Foster care changes you. It is beautiful and it is painful, all at the same time but Cynthia says she can't imagine who her family would be without this in their story. Some people think fostering or adoption is a mighty spiritual and noble thing, but it is very messy and doesn't feel very spiritual in the hardship. It can often feel like you're standing alone, because you have friends and family members asking "Are you sure?" with concern on their faces. You find yourself reluctant to say "yes..."

Cynthia and I also discuss the lies we often combat with giving our reluctant yes to God. There's the constant comparison game and feeling unimpressed with the ordinary, but God is the one who determines success, not the metrics of this world.

Cynthia encourages us to be intentional about the story of our life that we are writing, because it is the story our kids grow up seeing play out: what kind of story do you want them to see?

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of “The Connected Life.” She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

In this fourth part of our conversation, we are tackling reactive parenting. Let's face it, we've all done it: responding disproportionately to your child's actions, and this can happen for a variety of reasons as Kelly explains. We are likely dysregulated or triggered for some reason, and need to follow these 3 steps:

-Get curious: Am I thirsty, hungry, tired, or overstimulated?

-Make a plan to meet that need: Talk to your husband, friend, family member, to help get what you need in the moment, like a 5 minute break.

-Be consistent and keep trying. Changing habits doesn't happen overnight.

Our goal should be to build trust with our children and that comes through humility and apologizing when our actions go out of line, which in turn gives our kids an example for how they should act when they've messed up. We should be continually working towards a healthier place and acknowledge it won't be easy or perfect.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of “The Connected Life.” She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of “The Connected Life.” She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Kelly is the Founder and Executive Director of "The Connected Life." She helps people build healthy connections to God, themselves, and others. She is a speaker, trauma-informed life coach, and podcaster. She and her husband serve foster and adoptive families in their home in Kentucky. You can find all her links here!

In this first part of our conversation, we are tackling the definition of "mindfulness" and why it is so important for our parenting, especially when it comes to adoption and foster care where kids are entering our homes with intense emotions. We have to be able to regulate and demonstrate that regulation to these kids, help them build healthy, secure attachments, and be purposeful (not reactive) in our parenting.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Nikki is a teacher, foster mom, and author of the book "Help! I'm a Foster Parent!" Nikki and her husband decided to accept the call to foster after becoming empty nesters, and it has been a long, hard and beautiful journey to pour into these kids and lift them up to become healthy adults.

Nikki and I talk about the reality of fostering, the challenges it can bring, but also the beauty of it, how God uses this to refine our weaknesses and depend totally on Him. Fostering is a ministry but its in our very homes. There are over 400,000 kids in the U.S. foster system, but there are over 300,000 churches. If the Church steps up in this ministry, we could possibly reach every child who needs a home and needs hope.

Accepting the call doesn't mean God asks you to become a foster parent. There are many ways to be involved from providing meals to babysitting and more. If you're wrestling with this call, know that we are strongest on our knees in prayer.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Tori shares her foster story with me, how she was removed from her mother not just once but twice, and went through several foster homes. Tori talks about the good and hard parts of foster care, how it shaped her, and how it brought her to Jesus. Tori's story helps us better understand the experience of foster kids and equip us better with how to approach these kids, share the love of Jesus, and model what a life of hope looks like.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Together, Laura and I discuss trauma behaviors and responses in children, the relationships between the body and brain, and practical ways to help calm a child before the anxiety takes over. Laura also brings up the role model Jesus presents to us for how to navigate these hard feelings which can be overwhelming.

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

In today's episode I discuss how to navigate the holidays as foster and adoptive families, how to safeguard from unnecessary frustrations, how to prepare extended family and friends if your family needs to pivot the plan and the reality of "trauma-versaries."

Thank you so much for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Closing out our highlight of Adoption Awareness for the month of November - let’s talk about 5 practical ways you can support those who are called to love in the areas of foster care and adoption.

Whether you are waiting for your child or first foster placement or in over your head and have no idea how to answer when someone offers help - today’s episode is for you!

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

I have such a passion to see the big C church step in to this area of service beyond calling people to adopt - there are many practical ways they can do this

Oftentimes foster and adoption placements happen with little warning but always with much disruption to their normal rhythms of life

Check out my latest article on Christian Parenting and share this podcast with a friend!

Thanks for listening!

Today we will conclude with part 2 of my conversation with adult adoptee, author, speaker and Women's Ministry Specialist, Andrea Lennon.

I pray you have been encouraged and learned much through her perspective and experience.

If you have questions or specific topics you'd like to hear covered on this show, SEND ME AN EMAIL - I'd love to hear from you!

Thanks for listening!

Adoptive parents, through no fault of their own, only have one side of the story and experience. Oftentimes it can be difficult to understand the struggles our adopted children experience.

Today we have the honor of hearing from Andrea Lennon. Andrea is an adult adoptee and as she will share in today’s conversation, her journey has not always been easy, but God has written her story in a beautiful way and I know she is going to bless you today in part 1 of this uplifting and informative conversation!

Andrea is the Women's Ministry Specialist for the Arkansas Baptist State Convention, speaker and author for Andrea Lennon Ministry and host of the Inspire on the Go podcast. Andrea was called to ministry as a teen and has a passion to see women experience an authentic faith walk with Jesus. 

Thanks for listening!

If you are enjoying Called to Love, please leave a rating and share with your adoption community!

If you have questions or specific topics you'd like to hear covered on this show, SEND ME AN EMAIL - I'd love to hear from you!

We hold nothing back as we share honest and raw stories from the many experiences both beautiful and hard and offer insight into how God’s calling doesn't always turn out as we planned but it is always as He ordained. 

It's not always easy to answer God's call to love when God's calling isn't clear or results are far from what you expect, but this is what inspired this ministry and we hope it inspires and encourages you in your current season. 

If you have questions or topics you'd like to hear discussed on this podcast, SEND ME AN EMAIL and I'd love to devote episodes to come to serve you and your family.

Thanks for listening!

Have you ever struggled with the feeling of not being qualified to parent your adopted or foster child? 

Do you struggle with the fears that you are irrevocably messing up your child because there were and are things you simply didn’t know…until you learned them - sometimes through messy trial and error?

I think all parents feel that way to some degree, even with their biological kids -but there can be a heavier weight to that term adopted in front of your child’s description that leaves you wrestling with whether you are either qualified to say yes or qualified to keep going.

In this episode I am going to talk about 5 responsibilities of parenting based on scripture and talk about why you are qualified to parent the child or children God has called you to love.

Scriptures mentioned:

Psalm 4:8 -  In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.

Col. 3:20-21 - Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

Ephesians 6:4 - Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Proverbs 1:8 - Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.

Proverbs 22:6 - Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Proverbs 13:24 - the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

Deuteronomy 6: 5-9 -

5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

Our children receive a birthright when they become a part of our families - and even if you are fostering right now, they are still under your umbrella protection, guidance and spiritual authority.

God has given you the children, He’s given you the how-to manual and He has given you full access to Him through the Holy Spirit to seek Him every step of the way as you parent these unique and beautiful lives He has entrusted to your stewardship.

The reality is, when you said yes to this calling a war cry was issued against you by the enemy because you stepped into something he delighted to destroy - to take part in the ministry of reconciliation.

Oftentimes the attack is aimed at your marriage because the enemy knows a husband and wife unified in their obedience to their calling is a force to be reckoned with. 

Therefore, we need to be aware, know how to identify and understand the enemy’s tactics and take action.

In today's episode I will share 5 ways to safeguard what is sacred - your marriage!

Thanks for listening!

I'd love to connect with you on Instagram, Facebook or JOIN MY EMAIL LIST for weekly episode reminders and free resources!

Favorite Takeaways:

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. ~ Ephesians 2:10

Every day we are putting our energy toward something - those relationships that matter most deserve our most intentional effort - do the work to safeguard and maintain it, or do the work to repair it later.

During your prioritized time together, establish phrases or words to communicate a need for help or reprieve during high stress or exhausted situations - do the work on the front end to prevent hurt in the moment.

Be ready to throw the first punch because it is not a question of “if” the enemy attacks your marriage, but when.

When you said “yes” to foster care or adoption you agreed to step into something the enemy of our souls delighted to break and when you did,  the enemy said “this means war” 

Where there is declaration of war, especially when it comes to our families, we have no choice but to stand up, armor up and fight - but how? 

In today’s episode we are going to focus on the spiritual warfare adoptive and foster families face.

We are going to talk about:

• Who is the enemy?
• What is his goal?
• What is his "why?"
• What are his tactics?
• What can we do?

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

People experience spiritual warfare in a variety of ways - some are oblivious (especially if they are not a child of God yet) others brush it off as irrelevant and not a part of their daily life, others still blame satan for everything and don’t take the fair share of the credit for their own sin nature and sanctification process.

The battle can be fierce at times but we know as believers that we have been given the authority and power in Jesus’ name to reject, rebuke and resist the enemy.

I sure didn't.

While we learn along the way, it's always helpful to have an experienced and expert voice to speak into tough topics like trauma, child development and mental health.

In this episode I sat down with author and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Travis Thompson.

Travis brings clinical expertise to today's conversation with extensive experience in addiction therapy, mental health and outpatient clinics with a family-centered focus. He and his wife have fostered kids from hard places and have a heart to see families say yes to the calling of foster care and adoption.

Travis and I discuss attachment, how trauma affects development and behavior and what foster and adoptive parents can do to help a child heal and thrive.

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

If you're working from an incorrect lens you are going to be addressing things that are not there or you are going to be missing things that are readily apparent.

One of the most helpful things you can do is learn.

One of the key components to successful parenting is self-regulation.

God gives grace where you haven't learned yet

Learn more from Travis at:

https://www.travisthompsoncounseling.com/

To Those Left Behind: Helping Partners and Families Understand and Heal from Addiction

YES! Send me the BONUS EPISODE with Travis Thompson!

As we consider everything we have discussed so far in this series, notice the action words…reflect, remember, establish, surrender. Saying yes to adoption or foster care requires intentional and ongoing action and for our last episode in this series I want to add one more word to that list of intentional actions…embrace - God’s call to love.

When God speaks to your heart about adoption, He gives you a choice to say “yes” but what I didn’t understand and have since learned is He’s also issuing an invitation and a choice to learn to love in an entirely new way. I was all in and committed to the warm-fuzzy, instant connection, this-is-going-to-be-a-fairy-tale kind of love. But love in the trenches? Yeah, it wrecked me. Why? Because to love in this way meant I had to change.  

What does it mean to love in this way?

Let’s dive into that together today…

Connect with me on Instagram or Facebook!

To dive deeper Into this series, grab your FREE GUIDE at christianparenting.org/calledtolove

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

Ahavah = Hebrew word for love.

The root word is "ahav" which means "to give"

Love isn’t an emotion at all, true love is action.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Without patience and kindness, children’s brains cannot begin to heal, and their hearts cannot begin to trust and therefore, they cannot learn to receive or give love.

It can be difficult not to judge or even celebrate the removal of a child from hard places due to the nature of their former life situation, but as Christians we are called to show grace even in the worst of circumstances.

The old adage is true, “actions speak louder than words.” You can tell your child you love them all day long. But the truth of your devotion will be established and proven by your reliable presence and display of love through the way you meet their physical, emotional, and spiritual needs.

Today’s topic is surrendering your fears - this is such a big one because, no matter where you are in your journey - there is always something you can choose to be fearful about. And usually our fears are expressed through the questions we ask.

Adoption comes with countless questions, unsettling risks and a good amount of fear. Once you sense the Lord’s prompting to take steps toward adoption, a flood of worst case scenarios aren’t too far behind.

So what questions can we ask and which questions are the right ones?

Let's dive in and see what God's Word says!

Download your FREE guide HERE!

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

Behind every question concerning adoption there is a heart crying out for a guarantee.

As much as we all desire that fairy tale ending, what we really want is to dodge those worst case scenarios. This is very normal and nothing to be ashamed of because we have an innate tendency to self protect.

When God prompts you to do holy work, the enemy is always standing at the ready to whisper lies that will sabotage the whole plan.

God is not frustrated by your questions. He welcomes the wrestling as long as you do it alongside Him and with a “thy will be done” mindset.

Am I called?

What step is God asking me to take?

Our God is infinitely patient and when He wants you to do something, He doesn’t leave you alone about it.

To understand God's heart for adoption we first have to understand His heart for the family.

God designed the family before He even established the Church. This speaks volumes about the importance of family in His eyes!

The need for adoption exists because of the brokenness of sin. God’s original design for the family did not include death, divorce, abuse, neglect, poverty or addiction. Just like with Eve, the enemy is constantly and relentlessly inserting himself into the relationships between men and women. He delights in disrupting and destroying God’s perfect design for the family. 

Families who say yes to adoption are willingly stepping into brokenness, assuming a battle on behalf of another, dodging fiery arrows of lies and warring to overcome darkness with the light and truth of God’s love.

Regardless of how He designs your family, God’s heart is for your family and all families to love, serve and be in relationship with Him for generations.

This is something the enemy of our souls despises and will seek to disrupt at any cost, especially for adoptive families. Therefore, we are in a battle with him for the very legacy God desires for our children and families. 

Download Your FREE guide to this series HERE!

Today’s topic is Establish Your Expectations. It is so easy to begin to craft our expectations for who our adopted child will be, how fast the process of completion will be and what family life will look like when your child comes home. 

Without realizing it, many of the struggles adoptive parents face with their journey and with their child are the result of unrealized expectations that haven’t been met. So I want to speak into this today and offer perspective from both Scripture and personal experience. I have had a lot of “aha moments” since our daughter joined our family and one of the biggest aha moments I have experienced had everything to do with my expectations and my response to…well, how nothing happened as I planned.

It's not too late to grab free download I have created to walk you through this series. Use it to refer back to the scriptures mentioned as well as journal and prayer prompts shared at the end of today's episode.

GRAB YOUR FREE DOWNLOAD HERE!

Favorite Takeaways:

Adoption rarely turns out the way we expect.

The adoption journey is filled with messy circumstances, unpredictable timing, and constant detours. And once your child comes home, things rarely unfold the way you imagined.

The truth is, the expectations you set for your adoption journey will determine your mindset and how well you walk through it.

Expectations can be a slippery slope and cause well-intended parents to trip up and focus their time, effort and energy toward an ideal that is different from what God has planned.

Adoption is not about getting “a” child for your family, it is about walking a journey of obedience as God leads you to “the” child He has for your family.

Honestly, more than I have time to list, so I am going to begin our time together with a 5 part series I am calling: Reframing Your Mindset as a Christian Adoption Parent

All throughout scripture we see adoption - the first account being Moses then other heroes of the faith like Esther all the way to Jesus Himself being adopted by His earthly father, Joseph.

Scripture is clear that God has a heart for those in need of forever families but I want to try and help you avoid, or at least navigate better, some of the struggles my family and I personally experienced as well as common pitfalls adoptive and foster parents can face. The truth is, we simply didn’t know any better, so my hope with this series is to, right off the bat, help you establish a healthy mindset wherever you are on your journey of adoption. And if you are currently serving in foster care, this absolutely applies to you as well!

I have created a FREE download for you to utilize as a guide through these first 5 episodes and would love for you to grab it over at christianparenting.org/calledtolove.

Check out the photo mentioned in today's episode HERE!

Favorite Takeaways:

• Each of us are called to love God, love others and share Jesus.
• For those of us who are called to adoption and foster care, that calling takes on a whole new meaning as we run a very unique and beautiful race. 
• It is not healthy to look back on things God called you away from ( aka Lot’s wife), but it is healthy to look back and remember what God called you toward. 
• Ebenezer - (stone of remembrance) a place of remembrance for a time when God clearly spoke and gave direction or came through for His people. (1Samuel 7)
• Adoption is not a process, it is a journey.
• You’ve heard it said many times but it bears repeating: God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
• Let me share something I wish I understood much earlier in my journey - because God has called you to this, your journey of being qualified for this will carry on for the rest of your life.

Called to Love is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org

As Christian parents we have a deep desire to love and shepherd our children well, but it can be challenging to navigate loss, trauma and how to best love and guide our adopted children. One thing is for sure, adoption is more than a process, it is an invitation to go on a holy journey with the Lord and with your family. Like any journey, there will be valleys along with mountain tops and battles along with the beauty. The good news is, what the Lord calls you to, He will equip you for.

Wherever you are in your journey, Called to Love is here to bring you a weekly dose of encouragement from the practical, clinical, and Biblical perspective along with personal stories from adoptive parents, adult adoptees and advice from various experts to help your family thrive in your journey and continue to say “yes” to your own call to love.

Called to Love is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org