Table Reads

133 - Bill & Ted's Friggin' Badass Voyage, Part 3

Mon, 14 Sep 2020 19:08:01 +0000

Our rebooted Bill & Ted continue on their "voyage" through time, picking up as many historical figures that are roughly analogous to the ones from the original film as they can, eventually making back with all of them to the present day... which is where the script REALLY diverges from the original movie. Haha! Just Kidding! It's almost exactly the same.

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Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producers: Ricardo Lugo and YoshiKiller2S

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

132 - Bill & Ted's Friggin' Badass Voyage, Part 2

Mon, 24 Aug 2020 15:14:28 +0000

Bill and Ted's Friggin' Badass Voyage continues as they begin to collect historical figures in earnest... Adding Eric the Red, Cleopatra and Calamity Jane to their roster...

There's also a bit of a time kerfluffle at the Circle K, where a startling (and kinda dumb) fact about reality is revealed!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

131 - Bill & Ted's Friggin' Badass Voyage, Part 1

Mon, 10 Aug 2020 16:11:06 +0000

Bill and Ted will face the music soon, but in 2007 they almost faced the threat of a reboot! Why the studio felt hat a new generation wanted a Keanu-free Bill & Ted reboot is anyone’s guess, but if you’re curious what was being considered back then, we have you covered!

As much as a reboot of the property was a poor idea, this is a surprisingly smooth read! We don’t agree with everything these writers chose to do, but its a fun read that may-well have been a fun movie if given the chance! After the slog that was “The Star Wars,” this light fare goes down really well and we ended up reading about 30 pages in a single episode, as opposed to only about 20 for our average script! Give it a listen, we think you’ll like it!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

130 - The Star Wars, Part 8

Mon, 27 Jul 2020 04:05:14 +0000

It’s finally the end of The Star Wars! Have you ever gone to write “Happy Birthday” or something as one line, and you start out with real big letters and you’re feeling good about yourself, and then you get toward the end and realize that you need a lot more room, so the last few letters are small and bunched up? Yeah, that’s this script.

Lucas decided that in the last 20 minutes, he would set up an entirely new threat, move all the plot lines in a whole new direction to address that threat, build up a huge finale, and then wrap everything up in literally half a page.

This script is bad, even for a first-time screenwriter. But keep in mind, George Lucas had already made two feature films by this point!! Anyway, we had to suffer through this, so now you do, too.

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

129 - The Star Wars, Part 7

Mon, 06 Jul 2020 04:15:09 +0000

There is some really unfamiliar stuff happening, but with familiar names! Like giant, slimy (but also hairy) creatures called JAWAS! Also, BERU turns up on YAVIN, but she’s some weird lady that lives in a futuristic tree hut. There are also WOOKIES, but they’re not quite the same, either. But the spider-dog is exactly like you remember it. Oh, wait, there’s no spider dog in Star Wars, that would be insane.

This is the penultimate (we hope) chapter of The Star Wars. Join us as we move inexorably toward what we hope is some sort of conclusion.

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

128 - The Star Wars, Part 6

Mon, 29 Jun 2020 04:05:03 +0000

Strangely enough, with part six we kind of start understand what’s happening in this script! We’re not given new information or anything… It just sort of brute-forced itself in and we were able to see the overall story through the sea of pointless one-line characters that have been distracting us all along.

This episode is mostly a space dogfight, the likes of which Star Wars has come to be known for, but the story doesn’t really move forward all that much and we’re left wondering… are they going to give us a liquid brain payoff before this script is done??

And if you think we’re focusing a little too much on the liquid brain subplot, we can only ask: WHY AREN’T YOU??

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

127 - The Star Wars, Part 5

Mon, 22 Jun 2020 04:05:04 +0000

As we head into the second half of the script, our heroes are still trying to escape Townowi with the royal children, droids and… uh, liquified scientist brains.

They go to a familiar-to-us cantina where they meet up with someone who is going to help them get off-planet: Han Solo! That’s right, we finally get an appearance by everyone’s favorite… green monster… with gills?

Okay, so things are a little different! But we get some really familiar stuff in the cantina, so we’re not TOTALLY lost at sea this time around!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

126 - The Star Wars, Part 4

Mon, 15 Jun 2020 04:35:10 +0000

While George continues serving up a complex web of political intrigue to rival Game of Thrones, he throws in the most insane bonkers hard sci-fi bullshit we’ve ever seen… Like, for real, you will be ASTONISHED… Guys, it involves Brain smoothies. Yeah, you read that right. No, we’re not misleading you.

If your curiosity piqued yet? If not, I just don’t know what to tell you… but for the rest of you, give it a listen! You won’t be disappointed! Unless you were looking for some real quality storytelling… then, yeah, you’re gonna be pretty disappointed. But it’s episode 126, you should know what we do here by now.

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

125 - The Star Wars, Part 3

Mon, 08 Jun 2020 04:05:11 +0000

We made it to part 3 of The Star Wars! This week, we have in store for you… like 30 more characters that have a line of dialogue or less, several colors of sky, and SO MUCH CHROME.

Beyond that, there’s not much I can say about what actually happens… maybe you can give it a listen and fill us in? Because we ABSOLUTELY could not follow the story!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

124 - The Star Wars, Part 2

Mon, 01 Jun 2020 04:05:15 +0000

It’s part two, and we’re giving you more of everything you love about Star Wars; Political maneuvering! Debate! Senatorial grandstanding! The heroic lead punching a princess in the face! Dozens of characters introduced to exist for the duration of a single scene! Truly, it is the Star Wars experience as George Lucas envisioned it!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

123 - The Star Wars, Part 1

Mon, 25 May 2020 04:25:18 +0000

Years before he wrote Star Wars, George Lucas wrote “THE STAR WARS,” an epic Space Opera that has some words you might recognize but otherwise bears almost no resemblance to what we now think of as Star Wars. The story, goals and themes are completely different. And, oh yeah, Artoo talks.

There are 4 main drafts of the original Star Wars script, and while you might expect that they progress from something strange to something familiar, they are essentially all completely different stories, with only a few things in common throughout, finally leaping with the 4th draft into what eventually made cinema history.

So get ready, because we’re gonna show you that, oh yes it can get worse than Midichlorians!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

122 - Sam Hamm's Watchmen, Part 6

Mon, 18 May 2020 04:10:10 +0000

It’s the conclusion of Sam Hamm’s Watchmen, and it’s worth noting that this is now SAM HAMM’S WATCHMEN, because the finale bears absolutely NO resemblance to Alan Moore’s Watchmen and is, in fact, completely incompatible with the world that Moore established.

This whole episode is a series of “wait, what?” moments for anyone with even a passing familiarity with Watchmen. Time bubbles, main characters vaporized, and a turn for the meta that feels like Hamm ran out of ideas but really needed to meet a deadline.

If you thought most of this script was a fairly boring and straightforward re-trace of the major points go Watchmen, then this is the part where all that is thrown out the window!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Also: please visit our sister podcast Screenplay Archaeology, at www.screenplayarchaeology.com

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

Various musical tracks by Rafael Krux (orchestralis.net) — Used with permission.
Additional tracks from the public domain courtesy of www.FreePD.com

121 - Sam Hamm's Watchmen, Part 5

Mon, 11 May 2020 04:05:18 +0000

Nite-Owl and the Silk Spectre take to the skies in the most… written… blimp dogfight in history! BLIMP DOGFIGHT! You read that correctly!

There’s also some hanky-panky (sans Leonard Cohen), some more Rorschach violence in lockup and, of course, a PRISON BREAK! You won’t want to miss this!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

Table Reads Created and Produced by Shawn McBee in association with Fandom Limb Media.

Executive Producer: Ricardo Lugo

120 - Sam Hamm's Watchmen, Part 4

Mon, 04 May 2020 04:05:10 +0000

It’s Rorschach’s turn in the spotlight! There’s action! Violence! A revealed Identity! Prison! Therapy! It’s everything you could want from an unhinged psycho vigilante backstory!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

119 - Sam Hamm's Watchmen, Part 3

Mon, 27 Apr 2020 04:05:11 +0000

Learn about the origins of Dr. Manhattan! How did he get his powers? Answered! Where…uh…do his powers come from? Answered! What did his dad do for a living? Mentioned!

Actually, the guys do more to inform you of the backstory of Dr. Manhattan (neé Osterman) than the script does. But it is a very Manhattan-centric episode, if you’re into Big Blue! So come spend some time with the only superhuman on Earth… We have been assured that doing so via a podcast will not give you Blue Dick Cancer.

And speaking of Dick, you’ll never guess who the President is! (Just kidding, you’ll totally guess, because it’s the most idiotic “reveal” in the history of cinema).

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

118 - Sam Hamm's Watchmen, Part 2

Mon, 20 Apr 2020 04:05:07 +0000

Have you been listening to this just because you want to hear us talk about big blue dick? You sick pervert. YOUR WISH IS GRANTED! This is the episode where we’re introduced to a not-flashback Dr. Manhattan, in all his naked glory! And, look, we’re about to tell you more about the episode, but be honest: you’re already in. This is all you wanted.

There’s also some great unhinged Rorschach action, as he decided to bust heads, literally at random, in the hopes someone has info about the Comedian’s murder.

But back to the blue dick… and the infamous threesome scene! Yeah, THAT’S IN THE EPISODE, TOO! So. Many. Blue. DICKS!!

Are you still reading this? Hit play already, you’re not fooling anyone!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

117 - Sam Hamm's Watchmen, Part 1

Mon, 13 Apr 2020 04:40:01 +0000

It’s 1989. Alan Moore’s Watchmen is a commercial and critical success. Batmania is taking the nation by storm, ushering in a golden age for superhero movies. So there’s only one thing to do: Hire the Batman guy to write a script for Watchmen… and hire Terry Gilliam to direct!

Does all of that sound too good to be true? Well, if you’ve paid any attention to what this podcast is about, then, yeah, it should. That’s kinda what we’re about here.

This first part of Sam Hamm’s Watchmen script gives us a glimpse at the downfall of the superhero team known as “the Watchmen.” Yes, we know that they’re never actually called that in the comics. TELL SAM HAMM, NOT US. Because they are explicitly referred to by this name. It’s a whole, weird opening sequence set at the Statue of Liberty, complete with Dr. Manhattan, an oddly glib Rorschach, and one exploding superhero. Who? Well, hit play and find out!

This week's cover photo is courtesy of Michael Stoler... and make sure you check out his site: http://www.stoler.info -- so many projects there that you absolutely MUST SEE!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

116 - Batman Year One, Part 6

Mon, 06 Apr 2020 04:40:16 +0000

We have reached the end of our Batventure! While it’s tempting to tell you that this is the most bananas conclusion ever, the truth is that this final installment of the script sort of settles down. It’s still… weird… but it never again reached the insane heights of the previous couple episodes.

Why on Earth would we be so honest? Because we respect you, we know you’ll listen because you love the show and, most importantly, it doesn’t matter… after 5 episodes, you KNOW you need to know how it ends!

Will Robin be introduced? Will the Joker be teased? Does Batman carry a picture ID? You’ll have to listen to find out!

Give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

115 - Batman Year One, Part 5

Mon, 30 Mar 2020 04:40:14 +0000

Witness the full, uncompromising power of the BAT-MAN, as he takes on the entirety of the GCPD, while hobos burn around him, like the most demented level of some rejected Arkham Asylum game!

This episode is almost wall-to-wall action of the most bananas-insane variety we've experienced yet, and that includes the cryogenic warg escape from the Lord of the Rings script!

Seriously, this craziness has to be heard to be believed. This is really the crescendo of the script, where we reach the apex of just how goddamn NUTS this script can get!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

114 - Batman Year One, Part 4

Mon, 23 Mar 2020 04:50:14 +0000

Having worked his way all the way to Gotham’s highest-ranking criminal, Bat-Man is shocked to discover that there is a deep conspiracy, and the real criminals are someone you’d never suspect! Unless you’ve ready any of the heavy-handed and childish foreshadowing all throughout the script.
What follows is some intensely-psychotic dead-dad letter-writing, followed by some skulking in some bushes and an encounter with the Catwo—uh, whore (sigh), Selina.

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

113 - Batman Year One, Part 3

Mon, 16 Mar 2020 04:45:10 +0000

With the news somehow mistaking the TW left in criminal’s face’s by Bruces Signet Ring for a Bat, the decidedly un-bat-like vigilante is dubbed The Bat-Man! Donning his familiar…um…catcher’s mask… Bruce finally becomes the dark avenger of the night we’ve been waiting for. Sort of. Ish.
He fights his way up the criminal ladder, seeking out the “general” of crime…

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

112 - Batman Year One, Part 2

Mon, 09 Mar 2020 04:40:03 +0000

Inspired by the televised heroics of Detective Gordon, Bruce the scrapyard worker set off to do battle with crime, by turning himself into a sort of crime honeypot!
For the better part of an evening, he fights crime by beating up everyone that tries to mug him… until he bites off more than he can chew! A stunning defeat teaches Bruce that if he is truly going to strike fear into the hearts of criminals, he’s going to need more resources… Namely, the local library!
While all this is going on, we get still more examples of the GCPD’s corruption, which seems to be what a 4th grader thinks corruption is… And Jim Gordon is NOT having it!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

111 - Batman Year One, Part 1

Tue, 03 Mar 2020 05:05:10 +0000

It’s time for Batman’s origin again. So, of course we’re going to go over the well-worn tale of Bruce Wayne being taken in by Sanford and Son and spending 15 years living in a scrapyard directly across the street from where his parents were murdered.

Wait, what?

We also meet Jim Gordon, the only stand-up cop in Gotham who apparently gets home from work and struggles with whether to blow his brains out. EVERY NIGHT. With his wife IN THE NEXT ROOM.

Join us as we experience Frank Miller’s slope from comics great to the hard-boiled, alt-right misogyny machine that he would eventually become. N this case, guided by the vision of extraordinary filmmaker Darren Aronofsky, who was just 15 years early on this concept.

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

110 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 11 (FINALE)

Tue, 25 Feb 2020 05:05:09 +0000

It’s the stunning (and overdue) conclusion to John Boorman’s Lord of the Rings! It’s been a thrilling and utterly weird 11 episodes, but we finally reach the conclusion of the greatest saga never filmed!

Sam and Frodo reach Mount Doom while war rages at the Black Gate... though that war seems mostly concerned with protecting a Frodo effigy, for some reason.

Unlike the Peter Jackson trilogy, which has basically an entire normal-length movie left to go after the good guys win, this one wraps up ALARMINGLY quickly, to the point where your head is left spinning, wondering if there was a time jump you missed!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

109 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 10

Tue, 18 Feb 2020 17:05:16 +0000

It’s the conclusion of the Battle of the Pellenor Fields, and Gondor has a new king! You’ll never guess who. Well, you might.

After a full episode away from them, we also re-join Sam and Frodo and see what they’re up to… HINT: They’re not currently having an easy time.

This is an action-packed episode that sees the conclusion of one major battle and the start of another, with the fate of Middle Earth in the balance! Don’t Miss it!

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

108 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 9

Tue, 11 Feb 2020 17:05:15 +0000

Who wants some Battle of the Pellenor Fields? I hope it’s you, because that’s what this whole episode is!

There’s death, and drama, and a new way to use horses! Do you like giant snakes? We’ve got that, too!

Going into part 9 of a script is completely unprecedented for us, but it somehow keeps being fun! Join us and find out what craziness John Boorman would have brought to the great battle at Minas Tirith!

Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

107 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 8

Tue, 04 Feb 2020 05:45:06 +0000

Sam and Frodo finally make it to Mordor, and we get the Battle of Minas Tirith! What an action-packed episode! Hell, there’s even a montage! And an army of the dead (guys, Jeff is so happy about that)!

We also learn that the defense of Minas Tirith is contingent upon treadmills! No, really, treadmills are VITAL to the survival of Gondor’s capital city… I guess all those soldiers are wearing Lulu Lemon under their armor, as well.

Middle-Earth Spin Class aside, things really heat up in this episode, so you’re not gonna want to miss it!

In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

106 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 7

Tue, 28 Jan 2020 05:10:04 +0000

As Frodo and Sam continue with Gollum toward Mordor, we’re reminded that in 1970, Gollum would have just been an actor in makeup. Stop reading this, close your eyes, and just picture an actor dressed as Gollum. In the movie makeup of 1970. Honestly, how great is that??

Meanwhile, things continue pretty much in line with what audiences will be familiar with from the books and movies… Merry and Pippin discover Gandalf the white, then travel to Rohan to free King Theoden from the influence of Wormtongue, while Aragorn and crew meet up and ride with Eomir. Also, Shadowfax turns up. Yeah, Shadowfax. Gandalf rides around on Shadowfax. Why do I keep saying Shadowfax? I HAVE NO IDEA.

All told, this is a lot more normal than what we’ve come to expect, but we’re pretty confident that it’s going to take a turn soon.

In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

105 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 6

Tue, 21 Jan 2020 05:10:18 +0000

We finally get through the Fellowship of the Ring portion of the story, as the aforementioned Fellowship disbands and goes on their separate quests.

Frodo sets off for Mordor on his own, with Sam in tow and Gollum not far behind, while Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas set off to rescue Merry and Pippin from a hoard of orcs…

It’s pretty much what you remember from the Peter Jackson movies, but stripped of all that dumb character-building, motivation, and emotional core. BUT WE FINALLY GET GOLLUM! Yay!

In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

104 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 5

Tue, 14 Jan 2020 05:20:05 +0000

Mourning the loss of Gandalf, the Fellowship has a sleepover with the elves, and Galadriel shows Frodo the full depths of the hospitality of the elves. All. Night. Long.

Look, I don’t want to spoil shit, but that’s not a joke. Frodo literally bangs the fuck out of Galadriel. That’s in there. Listen for yourself. Other stuff happens, too, but Frodo and Galadriel going to the bone zone is really the centerpiece. I mean, do you need to know more?

In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned.

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

103 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 4

Wed, 08 Jan 2020 04:25:13 +0000

The trials of the Fellowship continue, as does the abject weirdness of this script! There’s man-on-man sexy blood magic, cryogenic stasis, and everyone’s favorite part of the books, where the only way into Moria is for Gandalf and Gimli to engage in some weird (and oddly racist) BDSM!

Side note: Have you ever had a lost language BEATEN into you? With a stick? What am I saying? Of course you have! It’s a typical rite of passage, right? Right, guys? Right??

Moving on, we get to see John Boorman’s take on Gandalf’s big (non-BDSM) scene. I was going to make a joke about how you need to subscribe or YOU SHALL NOT PASS, but it seems too on the nose, so I’m not gonna.

But hey, if you want to join us for a livestream, just head over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and become a patron! You’ll also get early access to our episodes, AD-FREE, plus so much more!

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

102 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 3

Tue, 31 Dec 2019 05:05:15 +0000

John Boorman takes us through the history of Middle Earth, the Rise and Fall of Sauron, and the One Ring falling onto the hands of Bilbo Baggins, including the rich tradition of Vaudeville in Rivendell. Oh, you didn’t know that Rivendell is known for juggling, interpretive dance, Kabuki theatre and pantomime? Jeez, have you even read the books?

This episode goes a little long, but that’s okay with us, because we got through almost TWO WHOLE SCENES! Yeah, almost. This shit is pretty insane, guys.

If you want to join us for a livestream, just head over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and become a patron! You’ll also get early access to our episodes, AD-FREE, plus so much more!

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

101 - John Boormans Lord of the Rings, Part 2

Tue, 24 Dec 2019 05:05:06 +0000

The Hobbits set off for Rivendell, for reasons that are never, ever made clear, and are pursued relentlessly by water-soluble bad guys! They meet an ally along the way, who literally pops up out of nowhere and who they follow for literally no reason at all! The characters manage to have no personalities while simultaneously being somehow unlikable, but at least someone gets stabbed! Who? You’ll just have to listen to find out!

But our Patreon supporters already know, because they got to tune in when we recorded the episode, all the way back in October! If you want to join us for a livestream, just head over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and become a patron! You’ll also get early access to our episodes, AD-FREE, plus so much more!

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

100 - John Boorman's Lord of the Rings, Part 1

Tue, 17 Dec 2019 05:05:08 +0000

The start of any movie is where characters, themes and conflicts are established. There is a call to action, the establishment of the central conceit of the movie. It appears John Boorman skipped that part of screenwriting school. What we get here in part one is a confusing party, inconsistent characters, and a completely unmotivated quest, that the characters literally believe to be a vacation.

The beginning of this script is like a seven-year-old child recounting what they remember of the beginning of Peter Jackson’s Fellowship of the Ring, 3 months after they watched it. Join us as we discover John Boorman’s vision of Middle-Earth with all the pomp and circumstance of Bilbo’s eleventy-first birthday, and none of the boring establishment of what the One Ring is!

We also have a Patreon now! Go to http://www.patreon.com/TableReads and sign up for early, ad-free access to all our episodes, livestreams of our recording sessions and more!

Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!

As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads

If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

99 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 8 FINALE

Tue, 10 Dec 2019 05:45:19 +0000

This episode is ACTION-PACKED… by which we mean that there are pages and pages of no dialogue… but the sheer level of bonkers in that action makes up for it!

No exaggeration here: the insanity of this last part of Indy 3 is far in excess of all the insanity that has come before! There is so much insanity that we couldn’t contain it to a normal-length episode!

That’s right, as a special treat to you, our beloved listeners, this is a special episode that is almost TWO HOURS LONG! There was just so much indy we had to deliver into the world, we had to push through til the end. It might also have something to do with the fact that we’d rather start a new script for our 100th episode next week rather than be finishing one.

Join us for this unparalleled finale episode. It’s so crazy, it moves right past terrible and swings around to amazing. It closes the loop. Unbelievable, really. Just, wow.

Another special treat for you is that Table Reads is now available as a video podcast! Check out youtube.tablereadspodcast.com to see the video! Feel free to subscribe over there to never miss an episode. We make funny faces, it’s worth it.

Let us know what you think by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

98 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 7

Tue, 03 Dec 2019 05:45:21 +0000

I know we’ve given you Nazi speedboats, machine gun arms, haunted castles and even a giant tank, but part 7 is where things really start to get silly! We’re talking distracted giant tank driving, African Mountain Sharks, golden cities and gorilla-people!

Play a drinking game with this episode: When you get to a point where you assume Stephen Spielberg threw down the script in disgust, take a shot!*

*Table Reads claims no responsibility for liver failure as a result of this drinking game.

This episode also marks the first time we recorded the podcast as a video! Check out youtube.tablereadspodcast.com to see the video! Feel free to subscribe over there to never miss an episode. We make funny faces, it’s worth it.

Let us know what you think by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

97 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 6

Tue, 26 Nov 2019 05:25:13 +0000

This whole episode is basically just the fight against the giant tank. BUT OH, WHAT A FIGHT! It has a Rhino! And a Ravine! And a bi-Plane! And a friendship tree!

The giant tank sequence is basically the Death Star Trench run, but if the Ewoks were fighting on the sides, and TIE fighters worked by crashing into people, and there was a random Tauntaun.

The point is: this is the most ambitious and also bonkers sequence ever dreamed up for Indiana Jones, and that’s including the infamous fridge.

Agree? Disagree? Let us know what you think by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

96 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 5

Tue, 19 Nov 2019 05:20:16 +0000

As we re-join Indy, he is in the midst of a huge pirate battle in the Zambesi river. But that’s far from the most exciting thing to happen to Indy in this episode! Because we go from Pirates to the jungle, where the Nazis have unleashed a new weapon seemingly just to use against Indy!

And I really want to elaborate but I also really, really don’t want to spoil the surprise! So give this a listen. It is absolutely unbelievable. You’ll kick yourself if you miss this one.

And, as always, your input is welcomed! Let us know what you think by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

95 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 4

Tue, 12 Nov 2019 05:00:09 +0000

Hey there. Are you looking for some exposition? WE’VE GOT IT! Are you looking for a bunch of Betsy hijinks? WE’VE GOT THAT TOO! How about some Pirates? Oh, we’ve fucking GOT THAT.

Join us for Part 4 of Chris Columbus’ most notorious script, as Indy continues his journey to find… some very nice fresh fruit?

And, as always, your input is welcomed! Let us know what you think by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

94 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 3

Tue, 05 Nov 2019 05:00:05 +0000

Part three opens with Indy having just arrived in Africa, where he quickly meets an immortal pygmy, upsets some Nazis, and has to get in a speedboat chase in order to rescue that pygmy from those Nazis, lest he give Hitler the secret to his immortality...

And if all of that sounds reasonable to you, then we’re flattered that you’ve discovered our podcast, Mr. Columbus!

Whether you’re Chris Columbus or just someone suffering through his writing with us, let us know what you think by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

93 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 2

Tue, 29 Oct 2019 04:00:18 +0000

As we continue reading Chris Columbus’ Indy script, we wrap up the Scooby Doo portion (which appears to have no bearing on anything to come), we get some bizarre Professor Jones hijinks before our quest is finally established, and yes, there is a fair amount of attempted suicide, as all Indiana Jones movies must have…?

If you watched Temple of Doom one time, on an airplane, drunk, with a crying baby next to you and headphones that kept cutting out and that was all you ever knew about Indiana Jones and then 10 years later, you tried to write a script based on what you remembered, you might write this exact script!

Let us know what you think by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

92 - Indiana Jones and the Monkey King, Part 1

Tue, 22 Oct 2019 04:30:04 +0000

Before we tell you about the episode, you should know: We have launched a Patreon page at http://www.patreon.com/TableReads -- sign up for ad-free episodes, early access, live-streamed recording sessions and more!

Shawn, Josh and Jeff are reading a pre-Last Crusade Indy 3 script, and right out of the gate, Chris Columbus gives us the most-unlike-Indy Indiana Jones script you can possibly imagine. In fact, if you were to tell me that he had written a Scooby-Doo movie and just changed all the names, I WOULD BELIEVE IT. In the first 16 pages of this script, there are no less than a dozen Scooby-Doo Tropes… and nothing at all that you would affiliate with Indiana Jones.

So far, this has been one of the most bonkers, mind-twisting scripts we’ve done so far. So give a listen and see if you agree! Then let us know by dropping us a line on Twitter @theTableReads. You can also follow us on Instagram @theTableReads or Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads.

You can also find us wherever fine podcasts are downloaded! Find us on your favorite platform by visiting http://www.tablereadspodcast.com/listen

91 - Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman, Part 5 (Finale)

Tue, 20 Aug 2019 04:05:07 +0000

It’s the Finale of Joss Whedon’s Wonder Woman script and, guys, it starts off in pretty much the dumbest way you can imagine, introducing the silliest aspect of the Wonder Woman mythos, and not even in a good or motivated fashion. Honestly, it feels like he was getting bored with writing the script and decided to just wrap it up as fast as he could.

Give it a listen and let us know if you agree!

If you'd like more, visit us at www.tablereadspodcast.com.

You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram under the name @TheTableReads or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads

If YouTube is your favorite place for podcasts, head to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com or find us on whatever your preferred podcast platform is.

Lastly, please visit our friends over on Screenplay Archaeology for in-depth stories behind some unproduced screenplays: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

90 - Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman, Part 4

Tue, 13 Aug 2019 04:35:12 +0000

We were warned that this script got a bit icky, and this is the part where Joss finally endangers his Feminist Cred, as Diana is made less of a Wonder Woman and more of a Wonder Possession.

And all for a man. For shame.

If you'd like more, visit us at www.tablereadspodcast.com.

You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram under the name @TheTableReads or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads

If YouTube is your favorite place for podcasts, head to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com or find us on whatever your preferred podcast platform is.

Lastly, please visit our friends over on Screenplay Archaeology for in-depth stories behind some unproduced screenplays: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

89 - Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman, Part 3

Tue, 06 Aug 2019 04:25:13 +0000

Steve and Diana arrive in Gateway City, where Diana faces off against Strife for the first time in what must be the biggest coincidence since that Venom goop randomly fell right next to Peter Parker in Spider-Man 3.

Also like Spider-Man 3, there is a dance number. And, no, I am not fucking making that up.

Luckily, this is overall not anywhere near as bad as Spider-Man 3, so you should be able to get through it without feeling the need to knock yourself unconscious.

If you'd like more, visit us at www.tablereadspodcast.com.

You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram under the name @TheTableReads or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads

If YouTube is your favorite place for podcasts, head to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com or find us on whatever your preferred podcast platform is.

Lastly, please visit our friends over on Screenplay Archaeology for in-depth stories behind some unproduced screenplays: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

88 - Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman, Part 2

Tue, 30 Jul 2019 18:55:10 +0000

It's part 2 of Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman and things have not gone too badly thus far...
Diana establishes herself as a badass, we meet some proper villains, and a reporter is murdered by a train...dragon...skull...thing.

Enjoy some fun screenwriting while you can, because we have been assured that this script takes a turn...

If you'd like more, visit us at www.tablereadspodcast.com.

You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram under the name @TheTableReads or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads

If YouTube is your favorite place for podcasts, head to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com or find us on whatever your preferred podcast platform is.

Lastly, please visit our friends over on Screenplay Archaeology for in-depth stories behind some unproduced screenplays: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

87 - Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman, Part 1

Tue, 23 Jul 2019 04:15:12 +0000

Shawn, Kelly and Joshua start reading Joss Whedon's much-reviled 2006 Wonder Woman script!
It starts off with a pretty straightforward Wonder Woman origin story and, honestly, there's not much to be upset about in this first episode. Joss is a great writer who knows what he's doing... but this is also the straightforward part. There's time to go off the rails. For now, though, it's good enough to just enjoy Joss' take on the start of Diana's journey to becoming Wonder Woman...

If you'd like more, visit us at www.tablereadspodcast.com.

You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram under the name @TheTableReads or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads

If YouTube is your favorite place for podcasts, head to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com or find us on whatever your preferred podcast platform is.

Lastly, please visit our friends over on Screenplay Archaeology for in-depth stories behind some unproduced screenplays: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

86 - Gladiator, Part 6 FINALE

Tue, 16 Jul 2019 04:10:14 +0000

This is it! The stunning finale of Gladiator 2! And by stunning, we mean "wherein literally not a single thing that has been set up in the entire script gets paid off and the story is completely abandoned in the middle of what should be the climax in order to just do something weird and dumb that makes no sense!"

Yes, this script fulfilled all our greatest wishes for it.

If you'd like more, visit us at www.tablereadspodcast.com.

You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram under the name @TheTableReads or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/tablereads

If YouTube is your favorite place for podcasts, head to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com or find us on whatever your preferred podcast platform is.

Lastly, please visit our friends over on Screenplay Archaeology for in-depth stories behind some unproduced screenplays: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

85 - Gladiator Part 5

Tue, 09 Jul 2019 04:05:20 +0000

As we reach the penultimate segment of our journey through... whatever this script is... we find that the unyielding resolve of the Christians is... pretty yielding, honestly. We get to spend some time with some pretty hip cats, get to stare at some people and get to take a full and precise inventory of everyone and every thing in Rome. With all this counting, you'd think they didn't have a confusing and complicated numerical system!

Remember to check out our site at www.tablereadspodcast.com for all the latest news, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts to make sure you always get the latest episode.

LASTLY: If you'd like to know more about the back story of some of the scripts we've read (and a bunch we haven't!), check out Screenplay Archeaology Podcast: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

84 - Gladiator, Part 4

Tue, 02 Jul 2019 04:45:06 +0000

Maximus reconnects with his son. Meanwhile, Lucius proves himself be a total douchebag.
Meanwhile, Giraffes get a bizarre mention, and we find out that the pen is indeed mightier than the sword... in the most ham-fisted way possible.

And in podcast news, we are now on a BUNCH more platforms, including iHeartRadio! In fact, I challenge you to find a platform we're NOT on!

Remember to check out our site at www.tablereadspodcast.com for all the latest news, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts to make sure you always get the latest episode.

LASTLY: If you'd like to know more about the back story of some of the scripts we've read (and a bunch we haven't!), check out Screenplay Archeaology Podcast: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com

83 - Gladiator Part 3

Tue, 25 Jun 2019 04:40:03 +0000

Maximus continues on his quest to... something something Rome? Look, I'm sorry. This script makes no sense, has no structure, and was almost certainly written only during Nick Cave's blackout periods. Trying to summarize what's happening in a given episode is, frankly, futile.
Some stuff happens. Not much, but some. Shawn, Joshua and Jeff do their best. Which is more than we can say for Nick Cave.

82 - Gladiator, Part 2

Tue, 18 Jun 2019 04:30:20 +0000

This week, we're diving further into Gladiator 2, the aborted attempt to resurrect Russell Crowe's Maximus by having him... wander aimlessly through the afterlife?
Find out how bad something as great as Gladiator could go wrong!
And don't forget to subscribe to make sure you get every episode as soon as it posts!

81 - Gladiator 2, Part 1

Tue, 11 Jun 2019 04:30:22 +0000

"Gladiator 2," you may ask? -- Yes, you read that right.
"Didn't the titular Gladiator die," you may ask? -- Oh, yes.
"Who wrote this," you may ask? -- Nick Cave.
"The musician," you would be remiss not to ask? -- The very same.
"I loved 'Red Right Hand!' but does that qualify him to write the sequel to a Best Picture-winning film," you may ask? -- No, it clearly fucking does NOT.

That's right; Shawn, Joshua and guest host Jeff are reading the bonkers Gladiator sequel that no one wanted! It's a fun look at what happens when people don't stay in their damn lane!

Give it a listen and, if you haven't already, SUBSCRIBE!

80 - Preacher, Part 4 (Finale)

Tue, 04 Jun 2019 04:15:19 +0000

It's the conclusion of John August's Preacher script! We got through this in a brisk four episodes because, honestly, it was fucking GREAT! A really solid script deserving of the source material that should have made it to the big screen (though, perhaps not with DJ Caruso at the helm... that could still have ruined it).
It's not often that we get a chance to read something good on this show, so consider this a special treat and give it a listen.
Also, don't forget to like and subscribe!

79 - Preacher, Part 3

Tue, 28 May 2019 04:25:05 +0000

It's the third installment of John August's 2010 Preacher script, and we've got an Irish Vampire road tripping with a deformed youth, astral projection at a serial killer convention, Jesse and Tulip taken hostage, and something unpleasant going through Tulip's mind.
The wild ride continues apace, as we continue to have NO COMPLAINTS with this script! Do you even understand how rare that is?
[NOTE: if the answer is no, you really need to go back and listen to old episodes.]

78 - Preacher, Part 2

Tue, 21 May 2019 04:15:11 +0000

John August's Preacher script moves into full swing as the titular preacher, Jesse Custer, takes possession of the entity known as Genesis, he and Tulip are reunited, we're introduced to Cassidy and Arseface, and the Saint of Killers comes into play.
It's an action-packed episode that continues to BLOW OUR MINDS with how good it is! Give it a listen, you will not be disappointed!

77 - Preacher, Part 1

Tue, 14 May 2019 04:55:11 +0000

While Kelly is sadly indisposed, Shawn and Joshua are joined by Jeff Lewis to read a genuinely good Preacher script written by John August.
Gone is the normal snark and derision, as the gang just thoroughly enjoys an engaging and well-written script. So, our apologies.
For real though, guys... this script is SO GOOD. You're going to enjoy this.

76 - Shazam, Part 6

Tue, 07 May 2019 04:45:14 +0000

The FINALE of Shazam!! It’s been quite the journey to get here, but it’s worth it for what must be the single most bizarre ending scenes of any superhero script ever. Or, as this script would put it: THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE SUPERHERO FINALE YOU EVER SAW. Join the gang as they wrap up their reading of this utterly strange take on the Character that Zachary Levi ended up bringing life to!

Ep 75 - Shazam, Part 5

Tue, 30 Apr 2019 12:30:10 +0000

Captain Marvel has his first super-powered smackdown.
Billy Batson is revealed as the vulnerable alter-ego of Captain America through a combination of gigantic leaps of logic and miracle-level computer software (that comes pre-installed).
Sivana pulls off the single most convoluted kidnapping in the history of film. And I wish that were hyperbole.

Join us for the penultimate episode of William Goldman’s SHAZAM!

74 - Shazam, Part 4

Tue, 23 Apr 2019 04:25:17 +0000

Sivana makes Magnificus a super-powered adversary to Captain Marvel!
This movie says that ‘You’ll Believe a Girl Can Fall!’ — for, like 18 pages!

We see just how much Captain Marvel sucks. Literally.
Sivana kidnaps some billionaires, including Orphanage magnate Augustus Gates, leading CM to his first true act of Super-heroism, which is a nice change of pace from using the power of the gods to cheat on a test. Which is a thing that also happens.

What I’m saying is that William Goldman was not someone who you would want to have super powers. That guy’s moral compass is permanently pointing to “I’MMA GET MINE”

All this and more, in part 4 of William Goldman’s SHAZAM!

73 - Shazam, Part 3

Tue, 16 Apr 2019 04:20:17 +0000

The resurrection of evil incarnate! The power of the gods used to hustle at chess and play the MOST TEDIOUS game of baseball in film history! And if you think that Billy’ isn’t going to a “mature” movie on his first day with an adult body, YOU ARE MISTAKEN.
But don’t worry... there are some actual super-heroics. With juggling.
Y’know, writing a synopsis like this really does a great job of illustrating how little thought must have gone into this script.
But, hey, the gang take a brief break from a particularly painful part of the script to discuss how the game of Quiddich could be improved. So there’s that...

72 - Shazam, Part 2

Tue, 09 Apr 2019 04:35:08 +0000

It's part 2 of Shazam, so you know what that means! Captain Marvel [not the Brie Larson character -ed.] makes his big debut, allowing William Goldman to explore the sexual desires of a 15 year old girl for a man described as being 25! Ew!
Aside from the super inappropriate sexual tension, Jenny helps Billy get a grip on his new situation as Earth's Mightiest Mortal while elsewhere, we meet the children of Sivana, who have the Rowlingest names you ever heard! The transport their father's remains home in a rather unconventional way.
But don't worry! Before the end of the episode, we get STILL MORE incredibly discomforting sexualization of a 15-year-old girl! Gah!
It's like Lolita, if Nabokov thought her behavior was totally normal.

71 - Shazam, Part 1

Tue, 02 Apr 2019 04:45:10 +0000

This is the first episode of the ALL NEW TABLE READS!
With this episode, we welcome back Kelly Leviay as a full-time co-host and introduce Joshua Baker as a second full-time co-host in addition to show creator Shawn McBee, making Table Reads a 3 person podcast!
For the first foray of the new lineup, we’re reading our first script authored by an Academy Award winner: Shazam, by the legendary William Goldman!
Get a listen at what might have been if the new film starring Zachary Levi had been made about 10 years earlier (probably without Zachary Levi).
Guys, it’s pretty weird.

70 - Termite Terrace, Part 4

Tue, 26 Mar 2019 04:05:22 +0000

It's the Looney conclusion of Termite Terrace! You'll find out what this has all been building to! Spoiler: think of the most groundbreaking and/or popular and/or revered cartoon character to come out of the Warner Bros animation department... IT'S NOT THAT ONE.

No, this film builds up to... nothing you would expect to be the culmination of the story of the creation of the Looney Tunes. It's like if a Biopic were made about Stephen King, where the big finishing note was a shot of the manuscript for Rose Madder.

Next Week:
Table Reads will return with William Goldman's SHAZAM! -- As well as an all-new Table Reads lineup! It's a new chapter for Table Reads and we think you're gonna love it!

69 - Termite Terrace, Part 3

Tue, 19 Mar 2019 05:40:21 +0000

Pete deals with the fallout from taking a movie starlet to bone-town, which involves the conspicuously-introduced Dot to cool to him... but not so much that they don't still get married before this episode is over. And if you feel like that's a spoiler, it's only because you don't understand how little importance this event seems to hold for anyone involved, including the writer.
Far more important seems to be Pete getting his own unit with Landy (who is up to something shady), a labor union forming in Hollywood, and some incremental development of a rabbit character at the studio.

68 - Termite Terrace, Part 2

Tue, 12 Mar 2019 05:10:11 +0000

Our young hero Pete gets an opportunity to sneak a peek at a big-time actress for a cartoon, and ends up meeting a dame in the process. Yeah, that’s right, a dame... this IS the 1930s we’re talking about. The cartoon leads to some success and something altogether unexpected (and not completely believable)

Join Shawn and Trevor as they continue to be entirely unimpressed by the professional attempt at telling a story they've found interesting all their lives!

Ep 67 - Termite Terrace, Part 1

Tue, 05 Mar 2019 06:50:07 +0000

Table Reads co-founder and YouTube's own Looney Tunes Critic is back on Table Reads for the most appropriate script ever: Termite Terrace, the failed Joe Dante project that would have told the interesting tale of the birth of the Looney Tunes in probably the least interesting way imaginable!
In part one, you will meet all the pseudonymous creators of your favorite cartoons--and I do mean ALL, right down to the guy who delivers memos--while also learning IN SUCH DETAIL how an animated cartoon is made! It's like reading the script to an instructional video from the 40s!
It's a good thing Shawn and Trevor are here to put this script in it's place, while also doing a better job than the script at telling the real origins of the Looney Tunes, as animation history is a passion of theirs going back decades.

66 - Six Million Dollar Man, Part 7

Tue, 26 Feb 2019 05:30:06 +0000

The stunning FINALE of Kevin Smith's Six Million Dollar Man!
The final confrontation between Klatch and our hero, Steve Austin... and the fate of the world hangs in the balance! Or so we're led to believe. In reality, a script that is MUCH longer than it needs to be, still somehow ends up feeling like the ending was rushed to get it in under a 4 hour run-time.
Remember, if you want to read a 173 page script from 1996 that reboots a property from the 70s by stringing together every cliché on Earth, you can download it at www.TableReadsPodcast.com!

65 - Six Million Dollar Man, Part 6

Tue, 19 Feb 2019 07:00:12 +0000

After taking an extended hiatus to completely overhaul our lives, the studio and the show, TABLE READS IS BACK!
We left you hanging in the middle of Kevin Smith's utter masterpiece *cough* The Six Million Dollar Man, so we have picked up right where we left off...
As we re-join our hero, he's setting off on the mission for which he was created: Stopping Klatch!
This episode features a Bond-Villain-Like Mountain base, a Die-Hard-Like ventilation shaft incursion, robot ninjas and enough exposition to choke a blue whale to death! Oh, and guard sharks. Yeah. Really.

64: Six Million Dollar Man, Part 5

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 12:00:00 +0000

Having faced off against the mysterious Klatch, Steve confronts the Old Man and learns the origins of Project Six Million, as well as the limits of his freedom.

Needless to say, there's a lot that doesn't make sense. That's where we come in. Oh, no, we don't make sense of it, we make FUN of it! Is this your first time here?

Enjoy part 5 of Kevin Smith's Six Million Dollar Man (who costs $1.6 Billion).

Anyway, SUBSCRIBE! You won't regret it! (Probably).

63: The Six Million Dollar Man, Part 4

Tue, 26 Sep 2017 04:00:00 +0000

Alright, we're back again for another read of this marvelous script! People die, secrets are exposed, and Cliche? Yea, there's lots of that too.

SUBSCRIBE TO THIS THING. And check out RogueIntel.com for other great podcasts. And remember: Where we're going, we don't need good scripts!

62: The Six Million Dollar Man, Part 3

Tue, 19 Sep 2017 04:00:00 +0000

Who'd believe that we're finally getting to the "Good" (Finger Quotes) part of the script...you know, the part where Steve Austin actually gets to enjoy his new body!

Steve has a little fun, gets into a tight spot...and not unlike any other action screenplay, gets into a little trouble!

SUBSCRIBE TO THIS THING. And check out RogueIntel.com for other great podcasts. And remember: We're your real father.

61: The Six Million Dollar Man, Part 2

Tue, 12 Sep 2017 04:00:00 +0000

Following the not-at-all-seen-from-a-million-miles-away tragic crash of Col. Steve Austin, he wakes to find himself a little the worse for wear, much in the same way that Anakin Skywalker was a little the worse for wear after his fight with Obi Wan on that weird volcano planet.

What were we talking about? OH, YEAH!

So, you'll never guess who the government decides to use for their super-secret bionics program. Never in a millio--oh, yeah. How'd you guess? Damn, you're good!

SUBSCRIBE TO THIS THING. And check out RogueIntel.com for other great podcasts. And remember: We're your real father.

60: Six Million Dollar Man, Part 1

Tue, 29 Aug 2017 16:00:00 +0000

Meet Steve Austin, the non-wrestlingest test pilot in the world! And he know's his fiancee! (They've spent some time together). How does he fit with robot-crushing, data-downloading ninjas? Um. Okay, you don't find that out in this part. Sorry. BUT YOU"LL WANT TO KNOW, so HAHA, we trapped you.

Also, this episode Shawn welcomes a new co-host in Patrick Duffy! No, not the guy from Step By Step, even better... the guy from Prime, on the Rogue Intel Podcast Network!

Subscribe to this podcast to make sure you get it right away every week. And, if you'd like to read the script with us (or on your own), head to tablereadspodcast.com, where you can download this and every script we read. FOR FREE.

...The things we do for you people...

59: James Cameron's Spider-Man, Part 5 (Finale!)

Tue, 01 Aug 2017 22:00:00 +0000

This is the moment you've all been waiting for: the end of the stupid James Cameron Spider-Man script from hell! It's been a long, strange trip down megalomania lane with "Professor" Octopus, A.K.A. "The Real Spider-Man" and everyone's favorite wall-crawler.

We're not going to even discuss the batshit insanity that happens in this final installment because it must just be heard to be not believed. Needless to say, it's basically the Batman and Robin of the Spider-Man franchise, except nowhere near as good or believable.

And remember, if you'd like to read the script on your own, all our scripts are available HERE.

Subscribe, or we'll hire James Cameron to adapt YOUR life into a movie!

58: James Cameron's Spider-Man, Part 4

Tue, 25 Jul 2017 14:00:00 +0000

In this, the penultimate part of James Cameron's Spider-Man, Spidey proves himself SO BAD at maintaining his secret identity that even with a full face mask, his disguise is less convincing than Clark Kent's glasses.

Beyond that, Liz and Aunt May have a Bechdel test-failing conversation, Plutonium turns out to be pretty easy to get your hands on, and traffic out of New York continues to be the real menace of the Big Apple.

PLEASE NOTE: We do not make any money off this podcast. But when people listen, it validates our sad, sad lives. Be a hero: SUBSCRIBE

57: James Cameron's Spider-Man, Part 3

Tue, 18 Jul 2017 04:30:00 +0000

As Halloween comes about at Empire State University, find out what the hot costumes are this year (1993)! Learn about J. Jonah Jameson's amazing photo reconstruction powers! Find out just how little protection a cinched robe offers against gunshots! Marvel (HA!) at Spider-Man's complete inability to mourn his departed loved ones! And finally, witness the first full-on confrontation between Doctor Octopus and the Amazing Spider-Man! All on this week's thrilling episiode of Table Reads!

Of course, when new episodes post, you want to be among the first to receive them, so don't forget to subscribe, or we'll hire James Cameron to write a toast for your wedding!

56: James Cameron's Spider-Man, Part 2

Tue, 11 Jul 2017 04:00:00 +0000

Picking up after Prof. Octavius' totally preventable lab accident, things kick into top gear as Peter finds himself tussling with the same spider that gave Ock so much grief and quickly discovering that he is a wrestler.

Meanwhile, Doc Ock is in the hospital, unconscious... so we have to wait until the middle of the episode to hear him mutter "Okey...Dokey!"

Also, I think Aunt May has Alzheimers. That bitch is battier than a Gotham Billionaire. Oh, and Peter is the WORST at maintaining his secret identity. So much so that I don't even feel bad calling him Peter.

You don't want to miss the rest of this script, so subscribe! And if you want to read it yourself, you can download it for free at http://tablereadspodcast.com/scripts.html

We love you.

55: James Cameron's Spider-Man, Part 1

Tue, 04 Jul 2017 04:00:00 +0000

In 1993, James Cameron took a pretty decent script for a Spider-Man film, gave it his magic touch and then turned in one of the worst scripts ever written!

In this first part, we meet a demented college professor obsessed with destroying the universe... BEFORE he becomes a supervillain! We also meet Peter Parker, a hapless college student who has no luck with the ladies! Joining them are some girls, a jock, a nerdy friend, a completely unimportant spider, and some university administrators. And SOMEONE gets bitten by a Spider in a science experiment! YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHO! (no, really).

If you want to be sure you don't miss a single part of this 5-part epic, subscribe to this podcast on the podcast platform of your choosing!

54: Roger Rabbit 2: Toon Platoon, Part 5 (FINALE)

Tue, 27 Jun 2017 04:30:00 +0000

It's an action-packed finale as Roger, Jessica, Richie and a calvacade of Toons take on the Nazis and try to save the Allied leaders from a nefarious plot! Will we win the war? Will Roger and Jessica live happily ever after? Will Roger ever find his real mother? HINT: All these questions have the same answer.

We at Table Reads would like to once again give screenwriter Nat Mauldin massive kudos for such a funny, well-executed script. Our normal fare is mockery, but this script is beyond good; it is a masterwork, a great addition to the Roger Rabbit mythos with a true love of cartoon apparent in every scene. Thanks, Nat.

If you liked this episode: don't get used to it. We're back to reading bad scripts next week! But if you like THOSE, subscribe! We're on iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher, etc.

53: Roger Rabbit 2: Toon Platoon, Part 4

Tue, 20 Jun 2017 22:00:00 +0000

In part 4 of the too-good-not-to-have-been-made Roger Rabbit 2: Toon Patrol, our brave, ink-based heroes (and their human friends) are fully engaged in war against the Nazis, fighting for love, and up against a nefarious plot to kill the leaders of the Allied Forces! Meanwhile, Shawn and Trevor keep hoping for something to make this script bad enough to be worthy of this show, but are disappointed as it just keeps being excellent!

If you want more good scripts like this one, there's probably a podcast out there for you. But if you want a podcast where good content is a fluke, leaving the hosts to mock utter garbage on most episodes, then you should go ahead and subscribe, because that's what's on offer here!

52: Roger Rabbit 2: Toon Platoon, Part 3

Tue, 13 Jun 2017 13:00:00 +0000

The 52nd Episode of Table Reads marks one full year of content on our show! (Please ignore how long it took to make it to one year... time is relative).

This Anniversary episode, we see Roger Rabbit, his friends, and all the other Toons from Toontown join in the war effort against the Nazis! That's right, THIS is the Toon Patrol of the title. Turns out, the movie isn't just about the weasels in Judge Doom's employ. Sort of a confusing subtitle to use for this particular prequel, huh?

Only here on this podcast, find out why the US Military considers Toons to be the ultimate secret weapon in the war against fascism! And find out how well that works out for them (spoiler: exactly as well as you think).

And remember to click subscribe to make sure you always get new episodes in your podcaster of choice!

51: Roger Rabbit 2: Toon Platoon, Part 2

Tue, 30 May 2017 19:00:00 +0000

Continuing onto part two of the not-at-all-terrible-but-inappropriately-named Roger Rabbit prequel, Roger Rabbit 2, Roger and Richie become roommates and jump into the bustling Hollywood dating pool. There are acting auditions, chases involving angry military men and, of course, an ominous portent of Pearl Harbor!

And the best part is, it's actually funny! Like, intentionally! (don't get used to it)

Join in the fun with Roger and the gang, subscribe if you'd like the content as soon as it posts and don't forget to check out the rest of the great podcasts on rogueintel.com!

50: Roger Rabbit 2: Toon Platoon, Part 1

Tue, 23 May 2017 14:30:00 +0000

In honor of Table Reads reaching 50 episodes, we have a special treat that breaks tradition: A legitimately GOOD script!

That's right, the aborted prequel to Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, it turns out, is a genuinely good, fun read. But it's our special treat to you and not just an accident because we don't read these things in advance, no sir.

Why it's still called "Roger Rabbit 2" when it's a prequel is anyone's guess, and we've yet to meet any Toon Patrol, but this script shows Roger's humble roots in Kansas, the quest that brings him to Los Angeles, and his fateful meeting with a certain girl named Jessica...

And that's just in part one! As lifelong fans of Roger, we can't wait to see what the rest of the script brings, especially if it's half as good as this part.

It's kinda messing up our show by being so good, but we can't help but enjoy it anyway.

So give it a listen and don't forget to subscribe!

49 - The Crow 3, part 6 (Finale)

Tue, 16 May 2017 06:00:00 +0000

It's the shocking finale of The Crow 3: Resurrection (of the 80s)! That's right, the late-90s homage to the best of 80s Cop Action Flicks Wrapped in a Crow Premise finally wraps up as we discover the secret of the bad guy's plot, establish The Crow in the familiar face-painted guise we're familiar with and find out what the hell the creature in that box is!

HAHA, JUST KIDDING. Literally none of those things happen (Spoiler). All that we really learn is that you can cobble together a sequel to a movie that you don't understand, fill it with tropes and clichés from a dated and dead genre and ignore any semblance of a coherent story and 25 years later, some assholes will mock it on a podcast!

We truly hope you enjoy this last part of The Crow 3: Die Really Hard. Do yourself a solid and subscribe! And if we're not available to subscribe to on your favorite platform, send us an email at shout@tablereadspodcast.com and we'll make it happen.

You can also follow us on Twitter: @TheTableReads

48 - The Crow 3, Part 5

Tue, 09 May 2017 04:30:00 +0000

Kato and his partner Sarah are finally reunited, but Kato is promptly taken away by men in white coats because no one believes that he's part of a secret government agency under the direct purview of the president.

Also, Lacking a Danny or a Kelly for the girl roles, Shawn attempts to read Sarah as Jim Gaffigan's "audience thought" voice for the entire script.

Will Kato convince his partner that he's a super secret agent? Will we ever see some Crow-style makeup? Will this script ever begin to make any amount of sense?? To find out, Listen and Subscribe!!

47 - The Crow 3, Part 4

Tue, 02 May 2017 12:00:00 +0000

We're a little late posting this morning because, while everyone was worried about a writer's strike causing a stoppage of quality content, WE were up all night following the news because we were worried we'd lose the awful garbage that keeps us sustained.

Speaking of which: It's time for part 4 of The Crow 3: Resurrection! Now that our hero has finally started some post-near-death badassery (aka, dick-ripping), surely this script will get into more familiar Crow territory and become the neo-gothic, angsty action vengeance flick we've been waiting for, right? Right?

Spoiler: No.

Once again, Trevor and Shawn are joined on this adventure by their old friend Jimie Williams (seriously, he has grandkids). Unfortunately, Danny had a scheduling conflict and was unable to join us, so we all had to split the voicing duties to his characters. Needless to say, we wish he'd been there.

Oh, and hey, if you're listening to this on a platform with some sort of button that says something along the lines of "Subscribe," go ahead and click that button. See what it does. I've always been curious.

46 - The Crow 3, part 3

Tue, 25 Apr 2017 04:30:00 +0000

The Crow 3: Die Hard and then Come Back for Revenge continues onto part three! Kato, still in a drooly, catatonic state, drools some more! The bad guys have a bad drug and a mysterious creature in a mysterious box! There are JUNKIES! And a mean HOSPITAL ADMINISTRATOR!

Will our hero manage to persevere over all these odds? Does he have enough drool to save himself and the ones he loves? Does anything remotely Crow-like even happen in this Crow Sequel?

LISTEN AND FIND OUT! THEN SUBSCRIBE!

45 - The Crow 3, part 2

Tue, 18 Apr 2017 11:00:00 +0000

In honor of Easter, which was mere days ago, we continue reading The Crow 3: Resurrection (because, get it, Easter... Resurrection..?)!

In Part 2, things pick up! There's more than one scene, for one thing... That's right, there are wedding bells, interrupted by gunfire -- because why not keep checking off the cliches?? -- the events that will lead to our hero becoming the Crow finally come to pass... but apparently, that Crow is taking a long goddamn time to make its way to him.

This episode features Jimie Williams and Danny Gorbachov helping to round out the cast and take some of the load off of Trevor and Shawn. Enjoy! And don't forget to subscribe!

44 - The Crow 3, part 1

Tue, 11 Apr 2017 11:00:00 +0000

Happy Tuesday, Read Freaks! Today, we're bringing you part one of a new Feature; The Crow 3: Resurrection, written by the very same guy that wrote such 80s classics as 48 Hours and Die Hard... Yes, DIE HARD.

And, as if to prove he had written those movies, this abandoned Crow sequel has every single 80s cop movie cliché in the book... right down to a forklift being involved in a shootout on the docks!

For this script, Shawn and Trevor are joined by Jimie Williams and, new to Table Reads, Danny Gorbachov! Sadly, Kelly could not join in on this script, but she'll be back soon.

In the meantime, enjoy The Crow 3, part one of which is one big 80s cop movie action scene. I'm not kidding. Like, the whole episode is just this one action sequence. The guy had some clichés to check off his list, what can I say? Oh, and if you haven't already: SUBSCRIBE ON YOUR PLATFORM OF CHOICE (please).

43 - A Sweet Kid, Part 2

Tue, 04 Apr 2017 11:00:00 +0000

We pick up with our drug dealer with a heart of gold and his mystery woman after they've gone back to her place for some... wine. We conclude Jericho's tale and move on to talking about the origins of the project and what would have come next, before conversationally meandering all over the place.

This week's guests are Kelly Leveille and Jimie Williams.

42 - A Sweet Kid, Part 1

Tue, 28 Mar 2017 11:00:00 +0000

Taking a break from pop culture's greatest mis-fires, the gang turns to their own oeuvre, picking a script written by Jimie, based on an idea by him and Shawn.

It centers on the kind of likable drug dealer that idiot screenwriters think exist. Smart, artistic, really concerned with the well-being of their customers... you know, REALISM. This drug dealer's world is turned upside-down when he meets a mysterious woman at a coffee shop (not a Starbucks, though).

This is a relatively quick read, covered in just two episodes. So enjoy making fun of the first half and we'll see you next week for part two!

And, hey, don't forget to subscribe!

41 - E.T. 2: Nocturnal Fears!

Tue, 21 Mar 2017 11:00:00 +0000

Remember the light-hearted wonder of 1982's E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial? Apparently, Stephen Spielberg didn't when, that same year, he wrote a 9 page outline for a sequel, rife with child torture, alien abduction and overtones of intergalactic race war! Oh, you think I'm joking? Then give a listen to our reading of this horrific follow-up to one of the most beloved films of all time. Guest-starring Jimie Williams!

40 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, Part 8 (FINALE)

Tue, 14 Mar 2017 11:00:00 +0000

It's been a long road, but we've finally reached the end. Welcome to the last installment of our reading of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian!

As Beetlejuice's "Juicifer" rampage continues, Lydia, along with the Beatniks (ugh), the Deetzes and Otho try to get everyone to safety and fight to stop the dreaded Beetlejuice! But how? It's not like the answer to stopping him was clearly established in the first film and even alluded to earlier in this one!

Be prepared for the climactic... well, no. It's not really. Honestly, even with me telling you right now that the ending is entirely anticlimactic, you'll still be astonished at how much of a climax it isn't when it happens. I can even keep talking it up and it's not spoiling a thing. It doesn't matter what I say, you'll never imagine just how tame it actually is. So enjoy this last part!

Next week, we have a tiny one-off for you as a palate cleanser!

And, between now and then, expect a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT from Table Reads! We're very excited! So stay tuned!

Also, subscribe and shit!

39 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, Part 7

Tue, 07 Mar 2017 14:52:58 +0000

THIS IS IT! The moment you've all been waiting for! The PENULTIMATE installment of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian!

Okay, I know you're really waiting for it to be fucking over, but this is the only way I can get through this, so let me have it, okay?

ON THE UPSIDE: Beetlejuice finally gets to... Beetle..juicing...? The Ghost with the Most unleashes his full ghostitude! We also learn that screenwriter Jonathan Gems believes Easter Island to be in Hawaii (see above) and we get the most well-written, subtle environmental subtext that Gems can manage. The caveat there being that he is very clearly a VERY bad writer. So keep that in mind. So, without further adieu, please enjoy our 39th episoide, part seven of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian.

Also, like us on Facebook, subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or Stitcher or Google Play! OR ALL THREE! FOR SOME REASON!

38 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian Part 6

Tue, 28 Feb 2017 11:00:00 +0000

Welcome back to the Deetz Paradise Resort, where you'll find more than your typical allotment of beachgoing beatniks, fuckable cacti, and culturally ambiguous hawaiian witch doctors!

This week, we tackle part 6 of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian by Jonathan Gems. Or it tackles us. Because, whoof. It is rough. This week features the resolution of a love quandrangle between a goth, a ghost, an inaccurately-labeled beatnik, and a catus. Well, a tree. Named Cactus. And I want to be very clear ALL OF THAT IS REAL, I DIDN'T MAKE UP ANY OF IT. It also features, what else? A fucking surf competition. Give it a listen and see if the Fonz turns up. At this point, anything could happen.

Also, please check out our redesigned site at www.tablereadspodcast.com and, special announcement, we're now available on Stitcher AND the Google Play store! If we're not on your favorite podcast platform, let us know and we'll make it happen! With so many options to choose from, you can't possibly have a reason left not to SUBSCRIBE!

37 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian Part 5

Tue, 21 Feb 2017 11:00:00 +0000

Trevor, Shawn and Kelly resume reading of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, in which Jonathan Gems continues to prove how little he understands any of these characters, their motivations, the basic idea of the whole concept or even the art of screenwriting.

There’s a surf competition, a lot of dancing, and a lot of utter fucking nonsense. Join us for part five of our Master Class in why this shit never became a movie.

36 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, Part 4

Tue, 14 Feb 2017 11:00:00 +0000

It’s time to check back in with the Ghost With the Most™ as he once again is hired to perform a Bio-Exorcism of the Deetz family… but this time in Hawaii!

It’s sure to be a fun— I’m lying. It’s awful. Just awful. Come join us in mocking the ever-loving fuck out of it. Guest-Starring Kelly Leviay!

Also, Happy Valentine’s Day!

Please Note: This is actually, really Part 4… if you donwload the file, please do not be confused by the name of the file, indicating this as part 3. That is incorrect.

35 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, Part 3

Tue, 07 Feb 2017 18:39:37 +0000

This week on Table Reads, we continue our very-serious and respectful read of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian with the gravitas it truly deserves.

As Lydia struggles to overcome the burden of her tedious family, she makes friends with some beatniks, proving conclusively that the screenwriter has no idea what a beatnik is.

And MAYBE Beetlejuice turns up somewhere. ou’ll have to listen to find out for sure.

Please Note: This is actually, really Part 3… if you donwload the file, please do not be confused by the name of the file, indicating this as part 4. That is incorrect.

34 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, Part 2

Tue, 31 Jan 2017 14:23:48 +0000

The Ghost with the Most is Back! …ish.

Join us for Part 2 of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian and learn what happens when the baddest Bio-exprcist to ever tame a sand worm visits a tropical paradise!

That is, if the script can move the story along that far.

With special guest, Kelly Leviay!

33 - Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, Part 1

Wed, 25 Jan 2017 17:14:25 +0000

Okay, we promised you a new original script this week, but things didn’t work out with scheduling. So, instead, we bring you one we have been ITCHING to do!

That’s right, the never-to-be sequel: Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian! Really, the title says it all.

For this script, Shawn and Trevor are joined by real human girl, Kelly Leviay (no more terrible falsettos!). Come marvel at the amazingly poor writing of Jonathan Gems, screenwriter for Mars Attacks.

32 - Streets of Amber SPEED READ!

Tue, 17 Jan 2017 11:00:00 +0000

The last Speed Read for a while (barring some unforeseen issue), we present to you what would have been a touching and thought-proving piece of drivel, had it ever been completed. This is another unfinished script by Shawn, who once again proves that he’s better than Trevor at totally failing to finish a script!

Also, it was Shawn’s birthday two days ago! What do you mean, you forgot to get him a present? All he wanted was for you to SUBSCRIBE! Better do it now. Better late than never.

31 - Speaking of Quinn SPEED READ!

Tue, 10 Jan 2017 11:00:00 +0000

As we work diligently to get more full episodes ready for your voracious consumption, this week we’re bringing you another Speed Read… this time, it’s a script written by Shawn. Rather, it’s a script that Shawn got an entire PAGE into before abandoning. And boy, is it douchey! But don’t take our word for it, give it a listen!

We’ll probably have one more Speed Read next week before resuming regular episodes, so be sure to subscribe so you can get them as soon as they post!

30 - H20 SPEED READ

Tue, 03 Jan 2017 14:20:38 +0000

Happy 2017, everyone! We’re still off for the holidays, so we have a Speed Read for you: A shorter script that comes in shorter than our usual episoides, just to remind you that we exist!

This script is called H20, sort for Hollywood 20, the movie theater that both Shawn and Jimie spent years working at. When this unfinished script was discovered floating around on a hard drive, no one could remember having written it, but as the reading progresses it becomes imminently clear that Shawn was behind it. Not enough to finish it, but whatever.

Enjoy this Speed Read and we’ll be back soon with a new feature!

29 - Ocean Child

Tue, 27 Dec 2016 11:00:00 +0000

Trevor and Shawn are out of town for the Holidays, so we recorded some short subject, quick episodes to tide you over on such occasions that we’re calling Speed Reads. This was to be the first of them, but it ended up coming in at the length of a regular episode, so we’re posting it as a regular episode. But lucky you, it’s just one part!

This is a short film that Trevor wrote and even mostly filmed back in about 2000. But it was never completed so you get to experience it as a podcast. Remember this moment, because you’ll be telling your children about it.

And when you’re done listening to this episode, try to imagine this stretched out into a 160-Page feature! Because THAT’S the next thing we’re recording! Oh, it’s gonna be glorious.

And if you’d like to read alon [...]

28 - Carnivore FINALE

Wed, 21 Dec 2016 03:25:03 +0000

Hey everyone, it’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for, the SHOCKING* conclusion of Carnivore! That’s right, it’s finally time to find out what’s going on with John and the soup kitchen, who’s for dinner and just who the Hell Rex Mundi really is. Strap in, it’s gonna be hack-a-licious!

*In this instance “shocking” should be taken to mean “absolutely telegraphed every step of the way starting on page one.”

27 - Carnivore Part 4

Wed, 14 Dec 2016 16:06:11 +0000

Welcome to the latest installment of Table Reads for the penultimate reading of Carnivore by the Wachowskis. Here, we see the script’s downward progression in quality and not-suck-itude continue, as… Okay, I don’t remember what happens in this episode. We recorded it like a month ago and I haven’t had time to re-listen to it.

YOU’LL JUST HAVE TO BE SURPRISED.

26 - Carnivore Part 3

Tue, 06 Dec 2016 11:00:00 +0000

Okay, NOW things are getting good! Which, as you should know by now, means bad. This is the spisode where the script (Carnivore by the Wachowskis) gets pretty ridiculous. It is pretty great fun and we’re glad to have you join us for the fun. With special guest Jimie Williams!

And remember, if you hate this podcast, click subscribe. Oh, boy, do we hate when people do that!

25 - Carnivore Part 2

Tue, 29 Nov 2016 11:00:00 +0000

Welcome back to part 2 of Carnivore by the Wachowskis… Part 1 was actually better than anticipated and didn’t leave too much room for mockery. But not to worry, Part 2 improves… by which I mean, worstens. Which is more fun! With special guest Jimie Williams!

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving (or, if you’re not in the US: Thursday)!

Also, please subscribe. Pretty please. Someone told me begging works. No, it wasn’t a woman, why do you ask?

24 - Carnivore Part 1

Tue, 22 Nov 2016 11:00:00 +0000

It’s a NEW SCRIPT!!

This week, we start reading the first, unfulfilled script by The Wachowski Brothers (at the time) Larry and Andy (now Lana and Lilly).

The script is called Carnivore and has never been unleashed on the world… until now. Join us as we learn that, yes, even successful filmmakers like the Wachowskis can start their careers thinking they’re far more clever than they actually are. Listen as they lay the most glaringly obvious foreshadowing in the history of cinema.

With special guest Jimie Williams!

And don’t forget to subscribe!

23 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 8 (Finale)

Tue, 15 Nov 2016 11:00:00 +0000

Batman v Superman, Dawn of Justice was re-unleashed on the world this summer, in the form of an even longer pile of garbage, so the time seems ripe to visit what might have been!
To that end, we present Asylum: Batman vs. Superman! This was a script from 2002 that was meant for a 2003 release. There are some tiny seeds of what would become BvS:DoJ but it is VASTLY different and, if we may get all preachy for a moment: seems to actually get who these characters are.This is another feature and you’ve probably noticed by now that we stop to mock shit a lot and digress more than we should, so it takes a while. This is THE FINAL PART! You did it! You reached the end!!!

22 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 7

Tue, 08 Nov 2016 11:00:00 +0000

21 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 6

Tue, 01 Nov 2016 11:00:00 +0000

20 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 5

Tue, 25 Oct 2016 11:00:00 +0000

19 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 4

Tue, 18 Oct 2016 11:00:00 +0000

YES, I KNOW! It has been MONTHS since part 3! It started as a technical error and then…whatever, it’s here now. And the rest of the episodes for this script are scheduled for every Tuesday, as is proper and right. So you can enjoy the rest unencumbered with fear that you won’t reach the stunning finale!If you don’t know what I’m talking about, allow me to present “Asylum: Batman vs. Superman!” This was a script from 2002 that was meant for a 2003 release. There are some tiny seeds of what would become BvS:DoJ but it is VASTLY different and, if we may get all preachy for a moment: seems to actually get who these characters are.

18 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 3

Tue, 19 Jul 2016 11:00:00 +0000

Batman v Superman, Dawn of Justice is coming out to own soon, so the time seems ripe to visit what might have been!
To that end, we present Asylum: Batman vs. Superman! This was a script from 2002 that was meant for a 2003 release. There are some tiny seeds of what would become BvS:DoJ but it is VASTLY different and, if we may get all preachy for a moment: seems to actually get who these characters are.This is another feature and you’ve probably noticed by now that we stop to mock shit a lot and digress more than we should, so it takes a while. This is part 3.

17 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 2

Tue, 12 Jul 2016 11:00:00 +0000

16 - Asylum: Batman vs. Superman 2003 Part 1

Tue, 05 Jul 2016 11:00:00 +0000

15 - BTTF First Draft, Finale

Tue, 28 Jun 2016 11:00:00 +0000

Hey, did you know that Back to the Future was originally written in 1981, featured a refrigerator-based time machine, an organ grinder monkey named Shemp and a bonkers ending? It stalled out for a few years before being rewritten as the movie we all know and love but we wanted to explore what might have been, if only someone had jumped at that original draft.
This is our first foray into material outside our own body of work and we had a LOT of fun with it! Unlike what we’ve done so far, there’s no way to call this script awful, but working through the differences between this and the Back to the Future we know is a blast. Being a feature, it’s split into a few episodes. This is the LAST PART! Ohmygosh, enjoy!

14 - BTTF First Draft, Part 4

Tue, 21 Jun 2016 11:00:00 +0000

13 - BTTF First Draft, Part 3

Tue, 14 Jun 2016 11:00:00 +0000

12 - BTTF First Draft, Part 2

Tue, 07 Jun 2016 11:00:00 +0000

11 - Back to the Future First Draft, Part 1

Tue, 31 May 2016 11:00:00 +0000

Hey, did you know that Back to the Future was originally written in 1981, featured a refrigerator-based time machine, an organ grinder monkey named Shemp and a bonkers ending? It stalled out for a few years before being rewritten as the movie we all know and love but we wanted to explore what might have been, if only someone had jumped at that original draft.
This is our first foray into material outside our own body of work and we had a LOT of fun with it! Unlike what we’ve done so far, there’s no way to call this script awful, but working through the differences between this and the Back to the Future we know is a blast. Being a feature, we had to split this up into a few episodes. This is part 1. Enjoy.

Supplemental - Our new website!

Fri, 27 May 2016 17:15:15 +0000

Just a quick update to let you know that we have a new site at tablereadspodcast.com

10 - Ghostbusters, The Next Gen

Wed, 25 May 2016 18:59:00 +0000

After taking a prolonged hiatus to wrap up some projects, Table Reads is back with new episodes EVERY TUESDAY. (this one is a day late due to some technical difficulties, but from here on out, you can expect to be able to listen on your Tuesday morning commute, if you so wish!)

In this episode, Shawn and Trevor dip back into the well to a collaborative effort from around the turn of the millennium: Their never-completed Ghostbusters Reboot!

This one is a shorty, they got it all done in a single episode!

09 - Urban Folktale Part 6

Tue, 12 Jan 2016 02:13:00 +0000

In our teen years, we wrote a short heist film that was later turned into a mopey teen angst NOT-Heist film.
THIS is that mopey teen-angst not-heist film. It was the first feature-length screenplay we ever wrote and, guys, it stinks. BUT, this is also the third draft. So imagine how bad the earlier two must have been, eh?Being a feature, we had to split this one up into a few episodes. This the LAST PART. Enjoy.

08 - Urban Folktale Part 5

Mon, 21 Dec 2015 17:59:00 +0000

07 - Urban Folktale Part 4

Wed, 16 Dec 2015 03:32:00 +0000

06 - Urban Folktale Part 3

Mon, 07 Dec 2015 05:03:00 +0000

05 - Urban Folktale Part 2

Wed, 25 Nov 2015 08:12:00 +0000

04 - Urban Folktale, Part 1

Mon, 16 Nov 2015 16:13:00 +0000

Our last episode was a short heist film that was based on an earlier short heist film that was turned into a mopey teen angst NOT-Heist film.
THIS is that mopey teen-angst not-heist film. It was the first feature-length screenplay we ever wrote and, guys, it stinks. BUT, this is also the third draft. So imagine how bad the earlier two must have been, eh?Being a feature, we had to split this one up into a few episodes. This is part 1. Enjoy.

03 - Aftermath

Sat, 07 Nov 2015 09:28:00 +0000

For this episode, we jump forward several years to a collaboration we made when we were much more mature and wise in the ways of the world. …Only to remind ourselves that 19 is probably the least enlightened age ever, because you think you’re so damn enlightened. This is our reworking of our earlier take on a Tarantino-esqe heist movie, after that earlier take was re-worked into a mopey mope-fest without a heist.

Unlike Highlander, this is a complete short film and we managed to get the whole thing done in a single episode! Enjoy!

02 - Highlander Part 2

Fri, 06 Nov 2015 09:27:00 +0000

It’s part 2 of Highlander: The Immortal Battle Continues! This episode has the backhanded honor of containing what MUST be the worst line of dialogue in the history of mankind. We timed it, and it had us laughing so hard at its terribleness that we couldn’t form a sentence for nearly 4 whole minutes.

01 - Highlander, Part 1

Thu, 05 Nov 2015 09:27:00 +0000

For our inaugural edition of Table Reads, we delve all the way back to our earliest collaboration when we were 15 years old: A Highlander Fan Film!
And, yes, it is JUST as cringingly bad as you think it is! The script is only 16 pages long, but there was so much to mock, we couldn’t even get through it in a single episode.Here is part one. Please, mock us. We deserve it.